Just your friendly neighborhood black man.

Hi, I'm DJ. Most Famous for the Blender Post. DCI Ageout c/o 2014. Cancer Survivor. I guess I'm too old for tumblr and no longer famous. Currently travelling the world, trying to figure out lfe.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

Making Kinky Candles

You guys Trying to make some candles for spicy activities. What is really interesting is that no one who knows how to make the candles is willing to publish how they do it. Even DEEP DEEP into reddit threads. I have spent a stupid amount of time reading blogs, websies, material safety, etc etc. You kind of have to go around: - don't do THIS because it's dangerous - don't use THAT material and various forms of not harmgin yourslef or others. I am having to piece together the information in between. I feel 94% confident in my target temperatures

90% confident in the raw materials 65% confident in the recipes

30% confident in the dye/colors I really just want this to be a hobby that pays for itself, as there is no candle maker in mexico so I can sell some to some friends.

[frankiedotbiz]

I NEED TO PROTECT WOMEN!

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

The German

This one kind of came out of left field. I wasn't expecting to meet a German while in Colombia. If I'm being 1000% transparent, I had been avoiding "white" women.But she wasn't american (or british) so I figured I'd give it a chance. Educated. Poly. Great vibes. The (positive) stereotype of a girl from Berlin. I stopped paying attention to height on the apps, but I really just didn't expect her to step out of her Taxi and be the same height as me (6'3") I can say, I love an AM date. We got brunch at one of my favorite spots in the city, and then went to go hang out in the park. I figured I should add, I date like a lesbian. Or maybe not, but I learned that 1. I am really picky screeing people 2. I enjoy having a good time 3. I am very curious about people So this often lead to 4,5,6, or even 12+ hour dates. Anyway brunch turned into the park, turned into, a walk, turned into dinner, turned into night, turned into going back to my place. I laugh now. Overthinking "Don't ove rsexualize this person you just met" and I said something out loud to that effect. She looked me right in the eye and said "Shut up, tell me I'm sexy, and that you want to fuck me" Noted. From there, time got weird. One date, turned into lovers. Seeing each other nearly everyday for the final 10 days of that trip. A fun quantam entanglement. There were lots of activies to be had, of course. Something I have to admit that was both scary and exiting. Not used to someone tall enough to push me against the wall. And a couple over 6 feet walking down the street? EVERYBODY stares. I'd be lying if I said I didn't absolutely love the attention. Also? my inner 13 year-old saying "theres no way you're really dating this woman" Anyway, I didn't expect to be so sad when we parted ways, but I was thankful for the time we had.

Also? History? wow. "Well, my father was raised by his father, who was raised by his father, who was a Nazi" in reference to her Father being the bit more strict one of the family. Oh and her boyfriend back home? A lean mean fucking killling machine. But literally a Nigerian descent kickboxing champion (also, I see she has a type) I forgot how itense the german stare is, and the directness. But it definitely helped me trust myself more about what I want, in many parts of life. Again, the resounding emotion is gratitude.

[the-big-mood]

They were originally going to arrange them Mexico, Canada, USA but then some Disney lawyers appeared from the shadows. 🤣

GET THE SHIRT HERE

[the-big-mood]

I mean....

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

Anyway a project I am working on is getting really hot, BUT specifically to be visually very masculine, so I can make more contrast by playing with softness and strength.

Inspirations include: men in submissive poses/shibari, and men w/flowers

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

I've spent so long outside the US it's re-written a lot of my expectations around racial dynamics (positively) But my busienss is still at its core centered in the US. Anyway, I am a young black man working in an industry dominate by older white women. And you know who respects me the most? The women who have non-white romantic or life partners.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

bleh, adhd kicking my ass lately.

Problem - wanting to do EVERYTHING, at once. Solution? - Constraints are you friend. Finish X by date. No more than Y hours per day or per week on thngs.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

So many things I've already discussed in therapy. But I guess I just need them out in the world? Idk, guess tumblr will see me again for a hot minute. Thoughts to return to: - self image - dating after divorce - (Re)defining masculinity & identity - It's really hard to find positive male spaces, while avoiding red pill bull shit. - Queerness (?) and hot NB's and gender non-confirming people

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

I need to make a NSFW page, or REALLY rip the bandaid off because for some stories there is no way to make the PG-13 and tell them authentically.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

Highest point or lowest point?

When I realized I could have a date a different person every day of the week if I wanted to, without really trying. In reality? Very exhausting. To be clear, always direct, clear communication, lying about your intentions is stupid. And the was not a specific goal. Spend qualitty time with quality people. I think lots of free time + ADHD + really high dopamine response in meeting new people, kind of led me down a weird rabbit hole. Also, you can never have enough of something you don't need. External validation only gets you so far. Rebuildig my self-esteem was great, but I had kind of forgotten about the "self" part.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

Going back to journaling in public I guess till I say something that accidentally gets me cancelled. I am no longer out here in these streets. But I go to be "rich", hot and single in the big city (Bogota, Colombia) and essentially live out maybe not the best version of my life, but the version that I needed, and really enjoyed. Truly, a male That Guy fantasy was my reality for a long time [also what a fucking way to rebound after ending a relationship, eh?] I am just having a hard time neatly packing away that Playboy Bachelor identity, that isn't serving me anymore. Maybe talking/writing about it will help.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

Women in Male Dominated Fields (The One With the Lingerie)

She got exactly what she wanted from me. Nothing more, nothing less. This was a weird one. I set up the date, and then I didn't get a real confirmation. Cultural barriers, language barriers. Whatever. New city, new country, and I was still enjoying myself. When my friend hit me up to hang out, I told him, I don't know. I'm supposed to meet up with this woman, and I'm not sure if I'm being ghosted. Thankfully, I lived in the zone where all the cool stuff is, so we hit up a bar down the street. I managed to grab a drink, get dinner, and as soon as I settled in, I got a text that said she was on her way. Well, fuck. A quick tirp back to my place, a hange of clothes, and then we met up where I proceeded to have my 2nd dinner within the span of 90 minutes. And that's where it got interesting. We tried to grab a drink afterwards, and the bar staff totally ignored us, I think an innocent mistake. SO we tried looking for another palce, as we were already in the cool zone, but nothing was quiet enough, and she was the one to suggest we go back to my place. So, along we went, after a quick trip to get a bottle of wine from the bodega next door. What happened next was a bit of a blur... ONly 2-3 glasses in, the conversation flowing, and the tension building, you could tell all was going well. She excused herself to the bathroom, and I new this was game time. What I was not prepared for, was for her to step out in an intriciate mulit-peice lingerie set. Oh shit.... Well, Ill spare the details but we do as adults do. And again. and again. and finally got to sleep. In the flash of a moment it's the next morning, and here comes round 4, and round 5. Again sparing the details, but it's VERY amusing to me when someone only learns enough english for dirty talk. Bilnguism scratches an itch in my brain, that was kind of fun.

I try to always be a gentlmen, but there is she is getting dressed, she's already called her self a taxi, and leaves my apartment walking herself to the front door of the building. In a daze, it hits me. Damn, I was the plan all a long. So that's what it feels like to be the one who's been hunted. She got exactly what she wanted. Nothing more, nothing less. Kudos to her. Definitely up there with some of the wilder ones I met. I still think La Toxica, takes the cake. But that's for another time.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

back on my bullshit (journaling, reflecting, uncovering then healing deep wounds)

[ontologicalevil]

The trick is to be more curious than you're scared.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

I'm back here I guess, I have so many random stories of my life I have not shared anywhere. On the topic of dating, this one time this woman was IN MY BED, and texting another guy. I, too, had a roster, and I don't really care about seeing other people, but homegirl we are IN MY BED? She was the epitome of incredibly crazy = great sex though, I have to admit.

[thatdrumcorpsguy]

in other newsssssssss. I tried hand sewing because I needed to alter a coat as part of a costume, and I didn't think it was worth taking to a tailor. I am happy with the result, but jeesus I didn't expect to spend 4 hours doing it.