The Chaotic Ramblings Of A Small Bear

A writting blog by yours truly! //Requests are open// Reader and OC friendly// Mun 20+ // Please read the rules before following/making a request! // Follows back from happypanda101

[thatpinkpandabear]

"Don't Mind Her, She's Just A Bit Autistic."

Welcome, small travellers! I'm Panda, and this is my little writing corner! Where I ramble and write about all the things I'm hyperfixated on. Come join me! Guidelines Registration Other Blogs

𝕀 𝕨𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕨𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕖

Headcanons

Oneshots

Canon x Canon

Oc x Canon

Reader Inserts

𝕀 𝕨𝕚𝕝𝕝 𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕨𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕖

Other people's ocs (friends only)

Themes of SA

Fetishes

NSFW (subject to change)

𝔽𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕠𝕞𝕤 𝕀 𝕨𝕣𝕚𝕥𝕖 𝕗𝕠𝕣

Creepypasta/The Morgue Files/etc

Arcane

Storm Hawks

Naruto

Voltron

House Of The Dragon

The Black Phone

And more! 𝔽𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕠𝕞𝕤 𝕀 𝕣𝕖𝕗𝕦𝕤𝕖 𝕥𝕠 𝕥𝕠𝕦𝕔𝕙

Mouthwashing

Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel/etc

𝕄𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥

[thatpinkpandabear]

Finn from stork hawks having a gay panic as he relises hew bisexual/gay for y/n!male

I Wanna Ruin Our Friendship

Finn x Male!Reader //HEADER NOT FOR REUSE!// Summary: Headcanons for Finn realizing he likes you and panicking over it! Warnings for slight internalized homophia/some mentioned homophobia. And a reminder: most of the characters of Storm Hawks are MINORS. So please don't be weird about it. Reader has been apart of the team since the beginning. Piper slaps some sense into Finn and is a good big sister.

🔷The moment Finn realizes that he likes you more then a friend, it's an overwhelming moment for him

🔷Like, to the point where he gets really anxious and has to lock himself in his room in order to calm down

🔷Personally, I don't think Atmosia is as homophobic as our world unfortunately is

🔷But I do think there are some cultures that are weird about it

🔷Finn's afraid of realizing that he's not straight because he's heard about what those people say about "those types"

🔷It wouldn't take you very long to notice that he's suddenly acting off around you, and he feels guilty because he knows none of it is your fault 🔷He'd especially feel worse if he'd known you before the Storm Hawks were formed 🔷You two had been really affectionate with each other, but ever since Finn's figured out he liked you, he's been avoding hugs and pulling away from your touches 🔷To the point he'll get snappy with you if you don't back off immediately 🔷Piper is the one that eventually has to step in because at that point the whole team has noticed that something is up and she see's that both of you are upset 🔷So she doesn't beat around the bush and confronts Finn directly, since he's the one who started acting weird first 🔷Finn of course tries to deny anything is wrong, but he finally breaks and confesses everything after Piper tells him you'd been crying over this 🔷He's scared she's mad at him because of how shocked she looks for a good few seconds, and is very surprised when she just hugs him

🔷This is probably the point where he just finally allows himself to cry about everything

🔷I think Piper has been very open about herself being bisexaul, so I feel she is the best person for Finn to confide in because she's likely experienced everything he fears

🔷She tells him that she knows what it's like to feel scared of being who you are because of what people will say, but it's worse to fake being someone you are not just to make people like you 🔷She validates his feelings, but also tells him that he's going about this all the wrong way and is hurting you in the process 🔷She doesn't pressure him to confess his feelings to you, just tells him that you deserve an apology and that he'd have to let you decide what happened next 🔷Finn apologized, but it took a week for you to fully forgive him 🔷You don't pressure him, but you do ask what you did wrong and Finn tells you the truth even though he's scared to because he feels that you deserve to know after all it has caused 🔷He'd think he'd ruined everything because you are quiet for a good few minutes and is about to apologize, but then you finally say you like him too 🔷You're honest, you tell him that he hurt you 🔷But you understand his feelings and say your sorry if you'd accidentally made things worse 🔷Finn reassures you you hadn't, that he was being stupid because he didn't know how to process how he felt 🔷You two don't automatically jump into being in a relationship because neither of you feel ready, but you go back to being close and clingy again 🔷Possibly a little more clingy, there is now cheeks kisses brought into the mix 🔷You two have gotten into the habit of taking late night flights on Finn's skimmer to look at the stars 🔷Finn loves the way you light up and point out certain ones to him

🔷He's caught Piper giving you two little smug glances with a mischievous smile and he always sticks his tongue out at her 🔷None of the team press you for a relationship status, they just accept the two of you are "a thing," whatever that maybe

🔷They've all been very supportive and Finn feels dumb for thinking things would change

🔷He's happy, and he's happy with you

[thatpinkpandabear]

Guys I Need Your Help Again— Fem!GNR Edition

Being Friends With Fem!GNR Headcanons

Fem!Izzy Stradlin x Backup Vocalist!Reader

Fem!Izzy Stradlin And Axl Rose x Best Friend!Reader

Voting ended onAug 13

Yes I know the context is semi Izzy focused rn lol don’t worry everyone will get their turn.

[thatpinkpandabear]

Guys should I give into the brain worms and do the Bully!TD Nikki Sixx x Male!Reader idea forming in my head?

Idk Nikki gives the most bully energy out of the guys (both movie and IRL) sorry lol. It's like a former bully reader had a complicated relationship with if that makes sense.

[thatpinkpandabear]

Guys What Courtney Related Idea Should I Do First?

Being Friends With Courtney Headcanons

Being Friends With Hole Headcanons

Setting Up Kurtney On A Date Headcanons

Fem!Motley Crue Headcanons: Courtney Edition

Voting ended onAug 10

Fourth Idea Explanation: Purely self indulgent, I just love the idea of Courtney becoming friends with fem!Crue/fem!Crue taking her under their wings because they see themselves in her a lot (her and fem!Nikki are particularly close because of their shared mommy issues). They’d cause so much chaos together lol.

[thatpinkpandabear]

Flower Buds

fem!Pelle Ohlin and fem!LOC Pelle Ohlin x Reader //HEADER NOT FOR REUSE!// This was very self indulgent, sorry not sorry. Summarry: After yet again being dragged off into the woods, you soon find your hair being decorated by your two favorite blondes.     Warnings for mentions of self-harm, suicidal thoughts, and dead animals. Reader is GN, fem!Pelle goes by Pernilla and fem!LOC Pelle goes by Petra, fem!Oystein (Oydis) and fem!Jørn (Jorun—yes it’s purposely spelled differently for this fic) are mentioned. If you do not like bandom/biopic stuff, DON'T READ.

“That one shouldn’t go there.”    You have to muffle a laugh with your hand as the fingers carefully picking at your hair came to a stop. There’s a small sound, just barely audible, soon followed by a soft rustle from the leaves beneath, indicating a shift. You turn your head slightly to see what was going on.     You had to bite your lip to keep yourself from bursting out laughing.    Pernilla was wearing an expression that would have honestly made anyone believe that this was a discussion about something more serious than flowers as her blue eyes met brown, steady and serious.    “Why not? It looks nice.”    Petra met her gaze with the exact same seriousness, the exact same blankness. Not breaking eye contact as her shoulders moved upward in a subtle shrug.     “It does.” She would agree, glancing towards you and frowning when she saw you looking. “Turn back around please.”    “Oh, sorry.” You do as ask, a smile threatening to break out across your face. Not long after feeling fingers gently brush against the spot that Pernilla had been working the flowers into your hair.     “It looks pretty,” You’d hear Petra say, her voice soft, almost mumbled. “But if you put the flower here--”    The finger carefully brushes a little to the left at the back of your head.    “Then we can make a pattern.”     Leaves rustle behind you once more, and out of the corner of your eye, you see strands of blonde brushing over your shoulder as Pernilla leaned forward. Silently analyzing Petra’s suggestion as if it was the most significant thing in the world.    You hear her hum, the strands disappearing from your line of vision. “We can do a zig-zag pattern.”    “Yes.” Petra’s voice picks up a bit, and you smile because you can hear the grin in her voice. “And we can do the sections in different colors.”     As both blondes quietly ramble about color patterns and flower types to one another, you turn around once more to watch them. Pernilla was showing off the whitlow-grass she’d picked, the tip of her little finger tracing the back of one of the white petals. Petra was excitedly pointing at the pink bergfrue’s she’d found, talking about combining the two.    It still amazes you that you’d somehow managed to find similar people, let alone manage to be friends with both of them. But maybe life just worked like that. Threw unexpected things at you and tested how you’d react to them. Apparently, you’d reacted well, because there wasn’t a day you regretted meeting the two blondes.    You’d been friends with Oydis and Jorun since your school days, so you’d been around since Mayhem had first formed. So, you of course ended up meeting Pernilla through them. You’d both been nineteen at the time. At first, you were scared that she already didn’t like you because she’d barely talked to you, but Oydis had assured you that she was just shy around people she didn’t know yet. Looking back, you realize that the Swedish girl being standoffish at first may have been your fault as well. Back then, Pernilla’s behavior had unsettled you. The way she’d seem to just stare off into space while everyone else was talking, how she’d talk about death and how she was dead, when she’d suddenly say something morbid out of nowhere. It’d completely thrown you off, and you’d started to seriously question why the girls had let her into the band in the first place.  

And then you heard her sing for the first time—well, scream rather than sing.    You’d been amazed. You haven’t heard anything like it before. There was something hauntingly beautiful about the way she’d push out each of the lyrics, how she’d growl during certain bits, allowing herself to be completely immersed in the performance. You understood immediately why Oydis had chosen her as the band’s vocalist then and there.     You’d watched the rest of the rehearsal slack jawed, and then when it was over, after working up the confidence, you’d complimented Pernilla. She looked genuinely surprised. But her blue eyes had lit up, and she shyly ducked her head as she mumbled a thank you. You could have sworn that you saw the ends of her lips twitch.    From then on, you’d done better to get to know her and came to just accept that Pernilla was Pernilla. She liked nature, the concept of the afterlife, and was not afraid to go to the extreme in her creative liberties. You’d even gotten into the habit of bringing the deceased animals you’d found on the way to the house to gift them to the blonde because you knew she would love it—something you’d never had imagined yourself doing in a million years. It wasn’t all nice though.    Oydis had warned you about Pernilla harming herself beforehand. So when you finally accidentally walked in on her doing it while you were over at the house one day, you were not surprised. You were severely taken off guard though. You had to stop yourself from yelling, clamping both hands over your mouth. The sound startled Pernilla, and she looked scared at the sight of you, which made you feel worse. Thankfully, Oydis had come running up the stairs the minute she heard the commotion. You had quickly learned how to bandage Pernilla up yourself after that day. You never yelled at her about it, never judged her for it. It was not your place to. Hell, you could name all the questionable things you’d done to make you feel better when you were in pain. You just silently let her know you were there for her and had gotten used to the same song and dance ever since. Nowadays, Pernilla would come to you directly when she hurt herself if you were around. Not all the time. But it was enough to make you feel grateful that she trusted you enough to do so.     You were so used to the strange by then that meeting Petra just felt like something weirdly normal.    You’d saw her when you were walking by the train station, looking lost and out of place. Duffel bag slung over her shoulder, brown eyes warily following the people that pasted by, mouth opening, then closing. Like she was trying to work up the courage to ask someone for help and kept failing. You walked over and asked if she was okay. Petra had startled, not expecting someone to approach her. Hesitating a moment before shyly explaining that she’d just come from Sweden and that she wasn’t sure where to go. You took pity on her and the two of you had ended up at a coffee shop. Petra wasn’t very talkative at first, glancing between you and the Boller you’d gotten her, chewing slowly. You didn’t press her to, both feeling a bit of a mix of protectiveness and on edge because of how much she was already reminding you of Pernilla. Eventually, she would explain that she came here in the hopes of joining or creating a black metal band. It was her dream, she’d quietly confess to you.  

From then on, when you weren’t hanging out with the girls or anyone else in your friend group, you were spending time with Petra. To both make sure that she was settling in alright and because you were intrigued by her. You’d often go on walks through the trails nearby together, Petra softly talking about Sweden and the types of music she liked. Perking up every time she learned that you liked something she liked.    Each passing day, you really wanted to introduce her to your friends, but you held off for a bit because you didn’t want to overwhelm her. You finally had your opportunity when Mayhem hosted one of their house parties once more.    You knew when they’d officially met, they would freak each other out. But it seemed that they had freaked each other out in a good way. You should have known it would happen. Because soon after, the two were sat clumsily on chairs in a quiet corner, wide eyed and rambling about Transylvania and death. You are certain that it was the first time you saw Pernilla open up to someone so quickly.     Oydis was more freaked out than either you or Pernilla were, honestly. Though you suppose that should have been expected as well.  After all, it wasn’t everyday you found someone almost identical to the vocalist of your band. Initially, she seemed amused by herself. Treated it as something to be added to the image the band wanted to present.    “We can say Perri went to the grave and brought a copy of herself back with her!” She’d joked.    Her tune soon changed the night Petra showed up, drenched in rain. Blood is running down her arms.    You’d known. You’d catch sight of the scars on her arms whenever of her sleeves hitched up, when she raised her arms above her head or when she reached for something sometimes. You never tried to talk to her about it because you didn’t know how she’d react.  

Maybe she knew that you knew anyway. At least that was your guess as to why she came. Neither of you ever really attempted to try and talk about the incident since.     Petra looked like she was in a daze when you tugged her inside, not saying a word as you frantically checked her over, asking her what happened. You never got an answer.     Oydis had come downstairs to check what was wrong not long after. She took one look at Petra and her expression changed immediately. You didn’t have to say a word to her. She was already looking around for the medical kit. You’d managed to carefully guide Petra to the bathroom when Pernilla came down.     She froze when she found the two of you in the bathroom. She looked... shocked. Scared. You think it’s the first time she’d ever seen someone else do this to themselves, and that realization hurt you a bit. Pernilla really and truly had considered herself alone. Petra opened the door to the fact that she wasn’t, and that greatly unsettled her. The blue-eyed blonde stood motionless in the doorway as you and Oydis worked together to bandage Petra up, gentle and extremely careful in your movements. It was only when the two of you exited the bathroom to clean up the red drippings on the floor that she moved. Sitting down beside the other Swedish girl, back pressed against the edge of the tub and knees pulled up to her chest.    You aren’t sure how it happened. But when you glanced back in to check on them, Petra was pressed against Pernilla’s side with her head buried against her shoulder. You didn’t say anything. Just quietly left once more to give them their privacy.    From then on, Pernilla and Petra had been inseparable. Always attached at the hip. Always asking about each other on the days they could not see each other. The only person they’d allow to touch each other at any time. Petra had officially become a member of the friend group, and will how things had been going, maybe a new addition to Mayhem. You never said anything to the doe eyed blonde, but you knew Oydis was heavily staring to consider the idea of a backup singer for the band ever since she’d heard Petra’s vocals. You were still bewildered at times by how it all happened still at times, but you were grateful. Because you could see that each of them had become a tether for the other to the land of the living and it gave you some comfort. The hope that maybe they would be okay.    You were broken out of your thoughts when you feel a poke to your cheek. You blink and soon make out the sight of the two staring at you with frowns that looked close to pouts.    “Turn back around.” Pernilla instructed you.     You feel your cheeks grow warm as you couldn’t help but giggle, doing as asked with a grin.    “Sorry, Perri.”    You stayed quiet as they finished up their work, hiding laughter as best as you could with each hum, whisper, and hum you hear behind you. You didn’t have anything to look at yourself with when the final flower was added and hands pulled away, but you still told them that they made you feel very pretty.    Petra grinned and shyly ducked her head down. Pernilla gave you a small smile, looking proud of herself as she informed you that you did look very pretty. You saw Petra nod her head in agreement.    They’re already insisting on getting you back to the house as soon as possible so you could see for yourself, each offering you one of their hands to pull you up. And you gladly take them, allowing them to guide you through the woods once more. Smiling as a common thought once again crossed your mind.    For people who wanted to rot away, they certainly made your life better and more bright.   Tagging: @lucydixon Hello! You said to tag you when I wrote my LOC fanfic, so I am! I know this is probably not what you were expecting, but I know you love Pelle, so I hope you enjoy it!

[thatpinkpandabear]

Looks like we are getting the Nikki series first!

Don’t worry fellow Mick fans, we are still getting papa Mick.

What I’m most likely gonna do is set up the masterlist for each series (like I did with Take Me From The Grave) and then do write their headcanons so people can have an idea of what is happening before we get into pieces of the fic series.

So stay tuned!

[thatpinkpandabear]

Hmmm… been thinking about what other series I could do with the TD!Crue.

What Series Idea Sounds More Intriguing?

Nikki Sixx x Younger Sibling!Reader

Mick Mars x Teenage Kid!Reader

Voting ended onAug 6

Nikki idea: Reader is Nikki’s younger sibling (biological/adopted/maybe even a stepkid his mom got custody of, it’s left up for interpretation) who is suddenly dropped onto him one day after his mom fucks off again.

Mick idea: Reader is Mick’s kid that he doesn’t find out about until later when they have to stay with him because their mother is sick and he’s just tryna figure out how the hell to be a dad (I don’t think it’s ever mentioned in the movie that he had kids? So we can assume Reader is his first child).

If anyone has any other series ideas, feel free to send them into my inbox!

[thatpinkpandabear]

Being Friends With Fem!LOC Varg Headcanons

//HEADER NOT FOR REUSE!//

Had to do this one next. Mainly because fem!Varg is very much more likeable and tolerable (and hotter) then regular Varg and Emory Cohen was hot in this movie lol. Warnings for mentions of toxic family dynamics, abuse, and body issues. Reader is GN, fem!Varg goes by Ylva as the name means "she-wolf" in norwegian, and these headcanons sorta go with the Being Friends With Fem!LOC Mayhem headcanons, as well as semi-based off the stuff I've read/heard about Varg. And again, if you do not like biopic/bandom stuff, don't read.

🐺🖤You met Ylva at one of Mayhem’s house parties    🐺🖤It’d have been a bit after she accidentally knocked into Oydis, and you find her trying to quickly clean the spilled beer off the floor, hands shaking slightly  

🐺🖤She seemed to snap out of whatever daze she was in when you spoke up and offered a hand, giving you a wary smile and muttering a small thanks 

🐺🖤You'd seen Ylva around before, you'd seen her at a couple parties, but this was the first time you talked to her  

🐺🖤Back then, she would have introduced herself as Kristi, as she hadn't changed her name yet  

🐺🖤Born the only daughter in a family of boys, Ylva always felt like an outlier     🐺🖤It didn’t help that they were always moving around because of her Dad’s job, so Ylva didn’t have a lot of friends as a child   

🐺🖤She still didn't now, and she felt that she should herself for being some weirdo who didn't grow up with any normal family dynamics     🐺🖤These were the main reasons while Ylva was so wary to open up to you initially, already reserved to the fact that you’d eventually leave like everyone else did 

🐺🖤But you didn't, you stayed even when she'd started rambling about J. R. R. Tolkien and his books 

🐺🖤And Ylva finally started to allow herself to consider the idea of actually having someone around instead of being on her own as usual    🐺🖤You were older by a few years, so you felt a bit protective her, especially with how shy she came off at first     🐺🖤Ylva didn’t open up to you immediately, it was slow 

🐺🖤The first time you smoked together, she confessed that she only started doing it to piss off her mother because it was “unlady like” 

🐺🖤That she’d purposefully smoke herself hoarse on bad nights so she wouldn’t be forced to talk     🐺🖤And once you’d actually met her mother... you didn’t blame her one bit, that woman was unsufferable     🐺🖤You’d came very close several times to telling the woman to fuck off, but you never did per Ylva’s request because she knew it would only make things worse  

🐺🖤The second thing she ever confessed to you was that she’d became vegan to get her parents off her back about her weight  

🐺🖤Ylva had always been the bigger kid and felt self-conscious about her body, and it was not helped by her parents always telling her to “eat healthier”     🐺🖤You slowly help introducing her to meat again once she tells you she wants to eat it again   🐺🖤The last thing Ylva would confess to you was that her father is the reason why she has the scar on her chin  

🐺🖤She tells you he hit her with a skate because she “wasn’t learning fast enough” and the blade sliced her chin open    🐺🖤She didn’t realize that she was crying until you hugged her, feeling a weight lifted off her shoulders at being able to tell someone the truth  

🐺🖤The first time you tried to introduce Ylva to the rest of the girls, it didn’t go well 

🐺🖤Oydis, of course, was acting bitchy and Ylva ended up storming off at the end of the night  

🐺🖤You and Oydis got into a screaming match over it where you essentially called her a mean girl who thinks she’s still in highschool     🐺🖤For once, Oydis genuinely felt bad and made an effort to be nicer to Ylva when you brought her around again  

🐺🖤It was awkward, to no ones surprise 

🐺🖤But it ends when both of them realize that they have similar interests     🐺🖤They end up having a big sister/little sister dynamic were they argue over about anything, but would fight anyone that looked at the other wrong 

🐺🖤You pick up on that fact that Ylva has a crush on Occultas PRETTY fast  

🐺🖤It was obvious with how she kept nagging him about silly things, or kept engaging with him despite claiming he was annoying  

🐺🖤They’d very much be that one scene from Who Framed Roger Rabbit 

“Seriously, what do you see in that guy?   “He makes me laugh”    🐺🖤You are the one and most likely ONLY person she’d teach the basslines of any Burzum song to 

🐺🖤When you're not hanging out at Helevete, you two usually hang out in the woods as Ylva loves nature 

  🐺🖤She tells you she liked coming out here because she felt like she could connect to nature more then she could connect to people 

🐺🖤But she tells you that all changed when she met you... and then immediately becomes embarrassed for confessing it  

🐺🖤You constantly tease her about it, but the words made you very happy 

[thatpinkpandabear]

Take Me From The Grave

A fem!TD and LOC x readers fanfic series //HEADER NOT FOR REUSE!// Summary: Witnessing how much Razzle’s death has taken a toll on Vienna, you convince the Crue to step back from the spotlight and take a much-needed break. Needing to get away from the chaos, you all end up taking a trip to Norway in the hopes of getting some well overdue peace and quiet. However, you’d soon discover that you all ended up right on the doorstep of chaos instead. 

This fanfic is purely self indulgent and is intended to have two reader inserts. POVs will switch, and some chapters will not feature the readers, but the story is still x reader based. Purple will be used to represent Motley Crue!Reader and Red will be used to represent Mayhem!Reader. This fic also will be focusing on a ship between fem!Vince and fem!Pelle, so if that's not your thing, don't read. Rock Bottom Blues fem!TD Motley Crue x Reader (Motley Crue!Reader POV) Nobody is handling Razzle's death well. Unable to witness Vienna wither away any longer, you warily propose the idea of a trip to the girls in the hopes it would somehow make things better.

(Rock Bottom Blues is the first part/the set up of the story, so it is being written first. The rest of the series will most likely be written out of order. Each part will be listed in chronical order here after they are posted)

[thatpinkpandabear]

So um guys hear me out Lords Of Chaos and The Dirt crossover... but make it fem.

Aka I got brain worms and now there is gonna be a purely self indulgent x reader series

[thatpinkpandabear]

Motivation has got me writing two angsty hospital fics back to back lets gooooo

[thatpinkpandabear]

Bandom Masterlist

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Motley Crue

H E A D C A N O N S

Being Friends With Fem!Motley Crue Headcanons for being friends with fem!Motley Crue!

Crossovers Take Me From The Grave (The Dirt x Lords Of Chaos) MTBA

[thatpinkpandabear]

Storm Hawks Masterlist

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H E A D C A N O N S Achilles And The Magical Coffee Shop Headcanons Silly headcanons for my friend @/hrhowling -- @/far-side-skies about their Dark Ace finding an interdimentional coffee shop! Austry And The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad (Almost) Wedding Headcanons for my friend @/ashe-alter -- @/grimm-the-6th about her oc Austry getting rescued from marriage by @/far-side-skies's Dark Ace Achilles!

O N E S H O T S The Usual Master Cyclonis x Piper -- Storm Hawks future AU Cyclonis is cranky because of issues with the Terras of Atmos. Piper does her best to cheer her wife up.

[thatpinkpandabear]

Writing Masterlist

//HEADER NOT FOR REUSE!//

Creepypasta Masterlist Bandom Masterlist Storm Hawks Masterlist MTBA

[thatpinkpandabear]

Being Friends with LOC!Fem!Mayhem Headcanons

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This jumps back and forth in the timeline, I just wrote the things that came to me first. Also this is a bit AUish because I did not want to write all the angst this time. And sorry if these are a bit more Pelle and Oystien centric, I just had a lot of thoughts for them. Warnings for mentions of self-harm, attempted suicide, knife wounds (specifically to the neck), forced isolation (cut off from friends), arson/church burnings, and stabbing/attempted murder. Reader is GN, fem!Pelle is Perri (nickname for Pernilla or Petra), fem!Oystein is Oydis, fem!Jorn is Joruun, fem!Jan is Janne, and there is a mention of fem!Manhiem (Kjersti). These fem!headcanons are only Mayhem focused, so everyone else is the same. The others will get their own fem!headcanons at some point. These headcanons are purely meant for fun and shouldn't be taken seriously. Lords Of Chaos is simply my guilty pleasure movie lol. If you do not like bandom/biopic stuff, DON'T READ. The “real” Mayhem will eventually get their own fem!headcanons. I just wanted to do LOC first to motivate me into writing Moth With A Flame content again.

💀🩸You’d known and been friends with Oydis and Jorunn since high school, so it was honestly easy for you to end up getting dragged into everything  

💀🩸Most times after school, you’d end up in the basement of the Aarseth family household to watch Oydis, Jorunn, and Kjersti rehearse 

💀🩸When Kjersti left the band, you’d taken over for a little while to help the girls out until they got a permeant drummer  

💀🩸They appreciated it, but... you weren’t exactly the greatest/what they were looking for  

💀🩸Plus, as supportive as you were, at time you DID sort of think the whole aesthetic/appearance that Oydis wanted to go for was kind of silly  

💀🩸Eventually Janne was picked to be the new drummer, but you two didn’t really get off on the right foot as she came off too cocky to you and made you feel embarrassed about your drumming albitites  

💀🩸But then Janne gave you advice and would give you drumming lessons between/after rehearsals  

💀🩸Meeting Perri was a TOTALLY different story 

💀🩸Like Oydis, you couldn’t help but just be intrigue by her 

💀🩸Perri always kept you on your toes, always secretly excited for her next idea or unexpected adventure she would take you on  

💀🩸The five of you kind of just ended up adopting Faust and taking him under your wing when you first met him  

💀🩸Same with Occultus, he just followed along like a lost puppy  

💀🩸And you, Metalion, and Ann-Marit end up bonding/becoming your own little trio outside of the group since the three of you are usually the ones that are tasked with taking the photos 

💀🩸Perri always loved playing with your hair, and would (after getting your permission) spend hours carefully playing with the ends of it as she mumbled about her ideas about the band or anything else 

💀🩸She also loved to take you out into the woods at the strangest hours to either show you something or just explore with her, holding your hand the whole time  

💀🩸The day Perri attempted suicide, you were home and thankfully found her before she could get to the gun 

💀🩸You of course we always aware that Perri struggled with suicidal thoughts and self-harmed, you had walked in on her doing it several times 

💀🩸But the fact that she tried to go through with it was still surreal and startling for you 

💀🩸Thankfully, Oydis came home not long after, and you had some help while calling for the ambulance  

💀🩸Because of this incident, Perri spent most of her recovery back in Sweden without any way to contact the rest of the girls because her parents thought they caused this with their “satanic music” 

💀🩸You were the only one that was allowed to call because you were not apart of the band and Perri always had pleasant things to say about you 

💀🩸You managed to take a trip Sweden at least once during this period, and the whole visit was just you silently cuddling with Perri in her room as she cries in your arms about everything that had happened  

💀🩸And even when she allowed to finally go back to Norway, she is still out of commission for awhile because of the injury to her neck 

💀🩸The slash had did some damage to her vocal cords, and the doctor had been extremely strict with his instructions, so she was unfortunately off the De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas 

💀🩸Oydis promised repeatedly that the band would rerecord the album with her vocals when she got better, but you can tell she is still upset about it  

💀🩸Perri’s simply happy that she can be around you all again and help around Helvete, but that means she gets into the... very chaotic things that happen 

💀🩸Because you had been friends with Oydis for so long, you can easily read her like a book 

💀🩸She absolutely hates it  

💀🩸Her nickname for you is “sweetheart” because her mother had called you that an annoying amount of times  

💀🩸You had grown as close as you’d had because you babysat Oydis’s younger sister when the two of you were still in school  

💀🩸And years later you grow even more close during the time Perri’s off recovering in Sweden  

💀🩸You’d hesitantly had to become the new leash that prevented her from getting into trouble since Jorunn was off being focused on being a mom  

💀🩸It is Oydis’s fault you have a smoking habit  

💀🩸In the earlier days of the band, after the shows, you’d give Perri and Oydis a full washdowns in the bathtub 

💀🩸Oydis will never say it a loud, but her favorite part was you washing her hair, you were always so careful with your fingers 

💀🩸From the beginning, she knew Varg was bad news, but she hesitated on kicking him out of the group because she didn’t want to be seen as weak 

 💀🩸This caused numerous arguments between the two of you, especially after you got dragged along into one of the arsons 

💀🩸You had become dangerously close to being burned, and instead of getting at Varg for having put you in that position... she scolded YOU for it 

💀🩸This damaged your relationship a lot, and that’s when Oydis starts to hide stuff from you as things really start to escalate  

💀🩸Instead of having you cut her hair, you help remove the hair dye to get it back to it’s natural brown when you two eventually make up  

💀🩸Ann-Marit is still present to help, and the three of you make fun of each other as you try to figure out what you were doing 

💀🩸You were originally supposed to leave with her, but you get the gut feeling that something bad was going to happen and end up staying  

💀🩸And thank god you did, because not long after Varg show’s up 

💀🩸During the attack on Oydis, you literally throw yourself on top of him to try and get him off her, which results in you getting stabbed a few times too 

💀🩸The madness finally ends when you manage to find enough strength to SHOVE him down a fleet of stairs (good riddance!) 

💀🩸You pass out not long after, but thankfully by then one of the neighbors called for help because of all the commotion and the two of you get help in the nick of time 

💀🩸Oydis regained conscious to you sobbing into her chest, blabbering out apologizes about not sticking by her and not trying harder to get rid of Varg yourself  

💀🩸To which she weakly called you and idiot and kissed your forehead  

💀🩸You two are stuck in the hospital for a while and are very insistent on staying in the same room, at times even sharing one of your beds for reassurance that the other was still there 

💀🩸 Janne is that friend that will always jokingly flirt with her friends  

💀🩸And she is always making crude sex jokes to gross you out  

💀🩸She’d gotten you a bandana like one of hers so the two of you could match  

💀🩸Janne was always the one that tried to keep you all together by being the peacemaker that always fixed things with funny jokes  

💀🩸She absolutely HATES conflict  

💀🩸And her diversion from it ends up causing problems between you and her when shit starts happening with Varg  

💀🩸Because of everything that happened after, Janne feels INCREDIABLY guilty  

💀🩸She visits you and Oydis the most while you are stuck in the hospital to keep you company and to keep your spirits up 

💀🩸Jorunn has always acted as the mom friend of the group  

💀🩸You two bond over trying to keep the rest of the girl’s safe from their own stupidity  

💀🩸 She was the one who took care of Perri when she hurt herself, and you would help when you were around   

💀🩸Jorunn loves all of you, she really does 

💀🩸But at some point, the band got too much for her, and she started to want something more normal  

💀🩸You were the only one she really confessed this too and you were the first person she introduced her boyfriend to when their relationship got serious 

💀🩸Jorunn ended up naming her daughter after you (middle name) 

💀🩸Because of motherhood, she didn’t really get to spend a lot of time with you anymore 

💀🩸But the shit with Varg helps all of you reconcile, and Jorunn realizes being in the band is still something that she wants  

💀🩸She ends up rejoining and Mayhem finally completes De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas the way it was intended to be  

[allthingswhumpyandangsty]

anon in my inbox said fanfic writers who wrote about dark and taboo topics were not “real writers” because of what they wrote about.

reblog if you believe anon is wrong and writers are writers, no matter what they write about. no matter how they portray these taboo topics.

reblog if you believe art can be about topics that are controversial, taboo or outright disturbing, and artists who create controversial, taboo or outright disturbing art are as valid as artists who create art of conservative values.

reblog to laugh at anon ♡