that tall ginger kid @thattallgingerkid - Tumblr Blog

“If a person wants to be a part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to do so. Think twice before reserving a space in your heart for people who do not make an effort to stay.”

— marcandangel

My body is tired and ready for sleep but my mind is screaming to stay awake and wait for you to come over and fall asleep with me

whozainko

I need another tattoo

I don’t know what’s worse. Wallowing in and embracing the sadness of depression throughly nightly drinks with a cigarette in my hand u til my face goes numb. Or pretending it doesn’t exist and filling that time every night trying to fill the void with something else. Currently I’m biased towards the drinking. But maybe that’s because of the sin passed down from the father to the son. The pain and hurt caused me to leave the church when I was 16. At 30 I found the church again and I cry every time I kneel in the pew and pray to God. But when I go home, I still feel the unconsolable loneliness. I’ve read my bible. I’ve done my laundry and dishes. I’ve washed my towels and sheets and cleaned the kitchen and checked on my friends and found joy in them through those few moments on the phone. But I am still lonely. Maybe I’m not good enough. Maybe this is what life is, with or without God and friends. But I have faith. And this is not the end, because I’m still breathing.