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supesdavid

judge-beef

“LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO”

darktypedean-deactivated2020053

“ROUNDING THE CORNER WITH A BUNCH OF LESBIANS!”

Me leaving a staff development meeting.

zinogre

i downloaded a mod in skyrim that changes all the spiders to bears so the bears will liTERALLY DESCEND FROM THE CEILING OF CAVES

THRE BEARS AR E IN

four-seasons-sunflower

relishboi

they gave elastigirl the main role in incredibles 2 to make up for the fucked up shit they made her do in the first one

airfierce-deactivated20201208

okay first of all she is their MOTHER and she did NOTHING less than keeping her family SAFE

chambergambit

Fortune Teller reading my palm: It just says “yikes.”

captainmarvall

dance if you’re still alive and have trilogies to finish

strangehorse

i’ve never seen the cha-cha slide look cool before and i’m very perturbed rn

fuocogo

T’chacha

zimbabwe2007-deactivated2017060

memewhore

localstarboy

I think this applies to almost everyone 😂😂

keeping-up-with-the-olympians

THE GODS AS STUPID STUFF THEY DO

Persephone: Shamelessly cheats in board games. You’ll never catch her tho, so try to just accept it.

Zeus: Answers serious questions regarding all life on Earth with “Life is a mystery”, then proceeds to strike some tree with lightning to scare the ever-loving shit out of humans. Laughs himself to tears every time.

Hades: Secretly runs one of those dog-rating websites. Thinks no one in the family knows. Everybody knows. The others regularly gather to laugh at his descriptions. He gives every dog a 10/10.

Poseidon: Drank 10 ounces of sea water to win a bet once and almost died. To this day, considers it one of his finest accomplishments. Would do it again without a blink. Please don’t dare him.

Hera: Hasn’t slept in weeks, doesn’t even know where she is. Everything she does is stupid. Somehow still makes the best avocado spread you’ve ever tasted.

Athene: Thinks coffee can be a supplement for any fluid. Any. Fluid. She once tried to wash her clothes with coffee so even their smell would “keep me awake, I’m tellin ya”. Didn’t work, never will. Hermes still laughs about it.

Demeter: Tried to put braids into Cerberus’ fur once. Once.

Apollo: Bites all his nails. According to Artemis, even his toenails. That information is to be handled with doubt.

Artemis: Once called herself Apollo. She cried after. “The biggest mistake of her life”

Ares: Has a weird obsession with Japanese game shows. Has no idea where Japan is.

Hestia: Once wore the same socks for a week to prove feet don’t really stink. Turns out they do.

Hephaestus: Was convinced by Dionysus to try to forge himself into a sculpture for a Halloween prank. Got halfway done and realized he can’t escape with his hands buried. Was a half sculpture-half man for two days until Persephone took pity on him and rescued him.

Dionysus: Slept for three days straight. Nobody knows how. All he remembers is that he “peed for like 20 minutes” after waking up and considered taking a nap. Went for burritos instead, didn’t come home until a week later in nothing but a Hawaiian grass skirt. No one really cared. This shit happens weekly.

Hermes: Drunkenly tried to pierce his own ear, missed and landed a hole in his neck. Refused to get treatment, calls the scar his “earhole”, thinks it’s the funniest thing ever.

Aphrodite: She says she has a hidden tattoo. No one’s seen it. No one knows where it is. She brings it up from time to time and it drives everybody mad they can’t figure out what or where it is. It’s the word “SUCKAZ” with all caps on her inner lip done in red ink. They’ll never know.

eggings

apparently almost no one’s seen the video it’s free real estate comes from so here it is

lisbonsteresa

To Do List:

1. Buy money clip (engraved?)

nathaliehaha

2. Put $50 in it

cultofclancy

3. Chuck it away at the first sign of danger

S T R E E T S M A R T S

forever-painting-roses-deactiva

did april even………………………happen

godtechturninheads

April felt like it lasted forever……but now that it’s not April I have completely no memory of any April ever and I can’t seem to recall the last 30 days of my life.