You dont need him

Queer apostate | He/him | 24 | Please feel free to block me if you aren't comfortable with me following you!

[the-jesus-pill]

Quick pinned

👉 all apostates welcome

👉 questioning believers welcome but please stay respectful

👉 curious onlookers welcome but same as above. DO NOT reblog posts for cult aesthetics or cult roleplay. 

👉 no proselytizing in the inbox. you can ask questions if you want an apostate’s view on things but I am not going to argue or change my mind

👉 any anon hate/negative asks will just be deleted

👉 ex jews and ex muslims are welcome! antisemitics, nazis, terfs, swerfs, anti-muslims, racists are not welcome and will be booted. 

👉 everything is tagged - if you need something extra tagged, please let me know!

👉 spam liking and spam reblogging is okay and encouraged!

💖 leaving is possible, escape is possible, there are others like you, the world does not hate you. it is possible to live a happy, fulfilling life outside of your church/cult/community/family and you deserve the freedom you wish for

[the-jesus-pill]

Things to ask yourself if you are scared god is punishing you or if you are doubting your deconversion

Why did you deconvert in the first place?  

Would you truly be happy if you returned back to your old life? Would you really be accepted even if you do everything “right”?  

Why would god focus on punishing you instead of doing something useful (ie curing a sick child, stopping wars, performing miracles, helping his believers, bringing joy to another person)?  

Do you want to worship a god who seems to use petty, passive aggressive tactics to get your attention?  

Are you really being punished or could there be a different explanation for your current situation?  

Was your life problem and worry free before you deconverted?  

What can you do for yourself right now to distract you from these thoughts?

Resources:

Mental Health Resources - Dare to Doubt

Religious Trauma Syndrome - ChoosingTherapy

RTS How to Heal Tips - livingbetterlivesnwa

If you find yourself becoming increasingly paranoid or anxious, I highly recommend finding a professional in your area to talk to! There are lots of great resources online to find cheap counselling services. 

[the-jesus-pill]

You did the right thing by leaving. 

Even if it feels scary or wrong, your life is ultimately going to be better for it. They made you afraid of practicing your free will because they want to keep controlling you. 

But they can’t touch you now. 

You’re free. You belong only to yourself. You can rest now. 

Your life is only just starting..

[deprogramming-techsupport]

today's deprogramming advice is the reminder that if you know it's there, and you're consciously fighting it, you're already winning.

[utopians]

mormons undoubtedly in the top 5 worst things the united states has ever invented which is really saying something

[utopians]

sorry that sometimes when I stay up too late I start posting abt how much I hate mormonism but the spirit just moves me to do it

[utopians]

like the mormon church is just such a perfect microcosm of everything wrong with christianity as it's practiced among the american right wing. everything abt it is so disgusting. one of the most utterly repulsive spectacles of racism, misogyny, and bigotry to ever leave a stain on the earth

[agni-bi]

Bringing this back because there’s been a bit of a push from Mormon influencers to normalize Mormonism, and as an exmormon I’m here to say fuck that

Do not allow the LDS Church to rebrand itself as some kind of harmless quirky church that just has a few silly rules. It’s a fucking cult that brainwashes its members and actively harms marginalized people. Mormonism deserves every ounce of hate it receives and then some

[palisadewasp]

The image in the above reblog was a bit difficult for me to read, so here's a transcript of all the text.

Public perception of Mormonism:

Bikes

Magic underwear

Tradwife bullshit

"SOAKING LOL"

Some of them do polygamy or something idk?

Reality of Mormonism:

Anti-native racism in religious canon

Not allowing black people until 1978

Missions as a tool of colonialism

The founders being slave owners & pedophiles

Extreme misogyny that fosters skewed views of consent and makes it easy to sweep abuse under the rug

Teaching minors a horrific relationship with their body and sexuality and letting bishops ask invasive questions about both

Being a $100 billion corporation in a religious trenchcoat with major right-wing lobbying power

ZIONISM holy fucking shit

[hulahoopsoupgroup]

the seven deadly sins are such bullshit fear tactics. if youve left the church, embrace them.

be proud of who you are. be happy when you look in the mirror and see how hot you are. yeah i see you flexing in the mirror after a workout. nice progress btw honey you look nice today.

dont worry about getting seconds, or thirds even, at dinner. dont worry about eating what society says is "too much" or "too little". eat until youre full. set aside what you cant finish for later so you dont waste food.

its okay to be greedy. its okay to want things for yourself. sometimes we see things that people have and we're like "dude i wish i had that." thats just human. envy and greed on that level are normal.

take a rest day. dont bother going to church this sunday. take a shower, read a book, drink some tea, eat some good food, pet a cat or dog. take care of yourself; its not lazy.

be angry with those who wronged you. punch a punching bag, write about how much you hate them, go work out aggressively and take care of your emotions in a way that doesnt hurt yourself or others. its okay to not forgive the people who hurt you. you arent doing anything wrong, babe.

embrace your sexuality (or, if it applies, asexuality, cause yall need love too). stop feeling shame for wanting pleasure. go read or watch something that turns you on. explore your body. ask your partner to try something new. if youre asexual, then fucking step on the people who say you need to have sexual attraction to be human. you dont. you dont need to be allosexual (or alloromantic) to "qualify as a human." we all experience life in different ways. find your way to experience it.

thought crime isnt real

do no harm but take no shit

[exchristianjoy]

Christianity doesn't have a moral monopoly.

I know I'm "preaching to the choir" here, but I was recently reminded of the deep, dark spiral of fundamentalist Christian morality. I'm lucky that I don't get a lot of angry Christians engaging with my content, but every once in a while it happens. I try to treat them with kindness and respond with respect because I remember what it was like to desperately defend my deity. And more often than not, they back off when they realize that I'm not gearing up for the theological fight that they were expecting.

Someone commented on an old post of mine from last Easter, where I said "You are not responsible for Christ's death." So many of us were told that we were-- that if humanity had remained sinless or returned to a state of total grace that the sacrifice wouldn't have been necessary. A lot of what I share here is meant to counteract harmful messages like that.

But hoo, boy, did this not sit right with my Christian commenter. They accused me of thinking that I was a god, that I was sinless, and that I thought people didn't need to be held accountable morally. It was a reminder that the fundamentalist moral framework is so delicately set up that if one piece is removed (substitutionary atonement for example), it would all be in danger of falling apart.

I believe that we are accountable for what we do, but I don't think that accepting human sacrifice as payment makes me more accountable. I try to hold myself accountable for actual harm that I might cause instead of outsourcing that task.

Figuring out our own moral and ethical systems can be incredibly challenging, but also immensely rewarding. Exploring diverse perspectives can help us build a richer, more nuanced understanding of our responsibility. And after doing that work, our moral systems can be robust enough to withstand scrutiny and not fall apart if one piece is taken out to be inspected.

my linktree ♡

[canonkiller]

I just think everyone should take a moment to consider the question "what is your visual shorthand for cruelty?" and then follow it up with a critical "and who taught you that?"

specific examples include but are not limited to

why is an evil timeline character design disabled? (why do the heroes go through equally punishing battles and never lose an arm, a leg, an eye?)

why are the futuristic scifi terrorists uniformly darker skinned? (why are the heroes so much lighter?)

why is the greedy boss fat? (why are the heroes skinny?)

why is the criminal mastermind heavily scarred? (why is the brooding, traumatized hero unscathed?)

why is the predatory creep a bearded person in a dress and makeup? (why are none of the heroes trans women?)

who taught you that this is how things are?

how long do you plan on repeating it?

[canonkiller]

guys the point is "reflect on how you have learned bigotry through exposure and you parrot it in your own works and in the fandoms you engage with without self awareness" not "tell me, specifically, what random motifs you think are evil"

[canonkiller]

on the flipside, to everyone adding notes about hooked noses, turbans + headscarves, nonwhite features and cultural clothing in general, mental and physical disorders, and surely others I've missed in recollection: you are entirely right and should say it.

[just-a-dead-kid]

It's okay if healing is the hardest thing you've ever done.

It's okay if it's slow going.

It's okay if it hurts.

It's still healing. It's still worth it.

You're still healing. You're still worth it. 💜

[traumasurvivors]

Your trauma does not make you dirty or ugly. Your trauma does not make you less valuable or less worthy of love.

You are still here, and you can still write new, wonderful, amazing chapters in your story.

You are so much more than your trauma.

[cultsurvivorsafe]

Sending all my love and support to cult survivors who struggle during holidays.

If you have been excommunicated, cut off, or are otherwise alone

If you are forced to celebrate something you don't believe in

If you are triggered by all the festivities around you

I see you. I stand with you. You're not immoral or a downer for feeling the way you do.

[moonlit-positivity]

You deserve a happy ending. No matter what the situation is, no matter how hard it is to survive and cope. You deserve a true genuine happy ending.

[forestbunch-deactivated20230418]

Reminder that Christian Ritual Abuse or Christian Religious Abuse is a well-documented occurrence. Calling all religious-based organized abuse and cult trafficking ‘Satanic’ by default even when it is happening inside a Christian or Catholic church/school/commune/etc., uses Christian ideology to excuse abuse, and uses traditional Christian rituals and holidays - is a way to divert responsibility from Christianity and the many problematic, hierarchal aspects of that ideology that can be and often are used for abuse;

Examples include “To Train Up A Child”, The Duggars, Catholic Residential Schools, Conversion “Therapy” Camps, the many Troubled Teen Industry places that are Christian, ATI, FLDS, Jehovah’s Witnesses, and literally countless more Christian cults most of which are explicitly pro-beating children into submission and staying with abusers.

Abuse is not about any spiritual being or spiritual belief no matter how common or obscure; abuse is about systems of hierarchy and oppression. The colonized, white supremacist version of the Christian religion is one of many such systems of power that needs to be dismantled in society if we want to actually address abuse instead of chasing boogeymen and scapegoating the mentally ill.

[thecorvidforest]

just fyi if someone tells you they were in a cult, “which cult?” is literally never an appropriate reaction. neither is “that’s so cool, i love true crime!”. hope this helps <3

[alexthepleb]

Advice for Ex-Conservatives

I was raised in a hardline GOP/Southern Baptist household. During my later teens, I deconstructed the beliefs I was taught, and I've spent my adult life as a bleeding-heart socialist.

I want to tell you the truth: you never stop learning.

I want to tell you the truth: you never stop deconstructing.

I was on Twitter back then. I followed every left-of-center person I could find. I was soaking up ideas like a sponge. I took every tweet as gospel, which turned out to be VERY unsustainable.

You see, progressives disagree with each other. A lot. About pretty much everything.

It's not possible to reconcile every idea. You can't please everybody. That's the biggest mistake I made when I was fresh out of the conservative bubble. It took me by surprise how much people who agreed on 95% of issues could turn on each other with such incredible venom. It's something you will have to accept.

You can't just sponge up everyone else's ideas. You have to take everything you read with a grain of salt. It's really okay to apply the same critical thinking you applied to your reactionary political and/or religious beliefs and apply that to what other progressives say. Test everything. Question everything. It really is okay.

On the other hand, you also want to avoid being an argumentative dick. People you agree with most of the time will sometimes express ideas you don't agree with.

If the ideas are genuinely odious (some form of bigotry) then just block them and move on. It's VERY rare to change somebody's mind online. For your own mental health, it's best not to engage unless you are doing so for the sake of others.

Yet what if the idea isn't absolutely odious? What if it's just a reasonable disagreement? In most cases, I'd still recommend not engaging. Instead, study what the other person is saying. See if it makes sense, or if you can at least learn from their perspective.

You can actually learn something from a bad idea. And you don't have to be 100% in alignment with someone to treat them with respect or learn from them.

In conclusion, my new ex-fundies and ex-reactionaries, remember two things. One, it's okay to think critically about the ideas other leftists have. None of us agree on everything! Two, it's better to block than to be an argumentative asshole. And, you can often learn something from folks you disagree with!

Let's make a kinder world!

[bogleech]

I said this a couple years ago (one year ago?) and most of the comments on tumblr actually did not know this, so to reiterate what you’re up against: a VERY mainstream belief among American Christian fundamentalists is that they are the only ones who experience love. They raise their kids to think that everyone “living in sin” (all other faiths, atheists, and LGBT people) goes through life sad and empty, falsely believing they know what love feels like, and will never know until they’re “saved.” It’s not as simple as them diminishing the humanity of others out of hate, but being deeply brainwashed to believe others are automatically mentally less human. They are also very good at convincing new converts that they really are experiencing this “real” love for the “first time;” the same way members of all cults can become wholeheartedly convinced that they’re receiving psychic alien messages or communing with spirits. Cult conditioning is simply that powerful.

[midnight-in-eden]

The flip side of the redefinition of “love” is also that Christians genuinely believe they can “love” someone by calling them to repentance for their sinful lifestyle. They genuinely “love” their gay kids by not supporting their ~homosexual lifestyle~. They genuinely “love” people in foreign countries by continuing to send missionaries to colonize “spread the gospel.” “Loving other people” gets twisted into “doing what you think is best for other people,” regardless of if it’s actually good for that person or if that person wants you to do that.

Happiness get redefined too. As a child I was taught that while “people without the gospel” may claim to be happy, they couldn’t experience true happiness, because “true and lasting happiness” only came from the gospel. Other people could only experience temporary worldly pleasure, like the kind you get from buying something cool or riding a roller coaster (yes that was an actual thing that was said) or “indulging in sin,” but it would ultimately make them unhappy in the long run.

I was told that, since those people had never known the true happiness of the gospel, they mistook worldly pleasures as happiness, but in reality their lives were empty and less meaningful and deep down, they could sense something was “missing.” Also, apostates were all depressed and angry alcoholics who couldn’t be truly happy bc they’d rejected the gospel.

One of the techniques cults and high control groups use is redefining words to make the definitions suit their purposes. Love and happiness are just two words that get redefined this way.

[dumpsterprophet]

there’s no hate like Christian love, but it also seems like there’s no missery like christian joy

[ochadenhaven]

I made this because I needed one lmao

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