the nerdy bunch

a diagnosed d.i.d system. This blog will be for the system to show themselves freely.

[t4timekeeper]

an “original character” is like a kind of brain parasite

[molabuddy]

having ocs is so fucked .... i miss them so bad but im the guy who has to create new content. but im sleepy

[sleeplessv0id]

what doesn't kill you makes you weird at intimacy

[decomposedmaw]

[nymphoutofwater]

fuuuuck that is my circus. are those…? yep… those are my monkeys….. goddammit.

[managerie76]

[decomposedmaw]

Leaf boat

[the-fox-collective]

Sometimes I'm a shitty person. I'm sometimes a poor communicator, I have an explosive temper, I manipulate and I ghost people and I'm a complete ass to those I love if they come near me.

But I'm getting better. I'm learning how to control my temper. I'm working on my trauma so I don't perceive so many things as threats. I'm working on better communication, which is always a two way street so it's best if my side of the street isn't a fucking minefield. I'm working on not ghosting people (which is so so fucking hard but I'm fucking doing the work).

I have been a bad person. I have done some capital e Evil shit. I've been an asshole, I've hurt people, I've been a bad friend to people who really needed me. And I've apologised to the people I can. I've put in the work to make sure I don't hurt them again. I'm working so fucking hard to be better.

And a lot of that work was only able to be done when people listened to me. I have had to be so vulnerable and say "I suck. Please help me not suck." I've had to give people warnings about myself before becoming friends. My closest circles are the ones where we have understood ways of dealing with me. And if those people hadn't trusted me to change, I never would have had the chance to.

Bad people can become better. If you don't believe that you are creating a self fulfilling prophecy where any mistake or relapse (very common in recovery) is a sign of failure.

You have to give people the chance to become better.

[the-nerdy-system]

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Chronically ill

[professionallyunstable-deactiva]

there's not a single nonchalant bone in my body. I care so much I could literally vomit.