Mystery. Mastermind. Misantrophist. Millennial.

My Name is The Phantom. I am currently sending disaster over the City of Vreighton while studying digital art. Infamous for various crimes. ••• Escaped Jail counter: 6 ••• (My name is NOT „The Phantom of the Opera“! I am NOT affiliated with the Character OR the Musical!)

[thewolfatno9]

I'm not evil I just don't understand social cues. The mutilated corpse in my closet is irrelevant

[the-phantom2]

Me to the hero foiling my plans: I will stab out your eyes and shove them down your throat

Me to the underpaid cashier: good morning thank you so much have a wonderful day

[secret-blog-4sum1-secretly-evil]

do NOT recommend anything to me by saying “it’s really good!” I ONLY engage in EVIL media

[evilscientist8]

Psssst, I have news! A significant Lord of Evil has a crush!

From, Assistant and Goon's citizen friend, Vaporeon2010

(Assistant is @evilassistantbutnotmean and Goon is @boredgoon )

Oh? Well then.... I'll have to know more! This is huge news in the villainy community! A big evil lord...in BIG EVIL LOVE!?

Hehehe....~ how scandalous! Do come back with more info on this situation! I do love a little evil gossip!~

[bluejetofficial]

If you saw someone in a superhero costume passed out in a dumpster along 8th Street yesterday no the fuck you didn't.

[hell-propaganda]

I condone everything bad and I’m opposed to everything good.

[the-phantom2]

Making plans to kidnap a secretary and keep them in a secret place so they can write my emails for me

[the-phantom2]

When I think of how many more crimes I could commit if I WERENT FORCED TO WRITE EMAILS AND DO PHONE CALLS

[the-phantom2]

I know how to quietly break a lock and how to wrestle a weapon out of someone’s hand. I can move things with my mind. I can teleport. I can show people their worst fear. I am one of the most powerful and feared people alive.

Is that not enough? Why can’t it ever be enough?

Why do I also have to write emails?

[the-phantom2]

What’s with all these evil Overlords nowadays? Where are the evil Overladies?

[99-97]

People are so ungrateful. No one ever thanks me for having the patience not to kill them.

[the-phantom2]

This is a PSA:

Listen to your body and don’t overdo the crazy laugh.

I get it, we’re all dramatic bitches and it’s an important step to seem adequately evil, but know your limits.

It’s not great for your reputation as an evil mastermind to have an asthma attack in the middle of a robbery.

[mitskiacoustic]

i wish killing urself was a reversible thing i think it would be rlly cathartic & i woukd kill myself twice an hour also

[the-phantom2]

I bet it’s also nice for muscle tension

Like all the muscles relax for a bit? There’s no nerves and joints acting out?

Full body massage but better

[knifefightscene]

I don’t need therapy i need to kill people killing people would fix me being covered in blood will make me so stable and normal i promise

[the-phantom2]

I do it every other day and it works so well

[the-phantom2]

The definition of insanity is to do the same thing again and again and expecting a different result.

Therefore I’d like to say that the heros that keep on trying to arrest me, just for me to break out as soon as my powers regenerated a bit, are insane.

[nycteris]

[the-phantom2]

If I had a dollar for every chandelier I destroyed accidentally, I‘d have two dollars

Which isn’t much but it’s weird that it happened twice