the tumblr staff

Born to app(ly our knowlege of the youngins for financial gain)(not actual staff, only ironic staff)

[the-staff-official]

I wanna buy some crabs for my friend but I don't have a credit card 😔

Do you have paypal? Have you paypal? Will you have paypal? When will you have paypay?

how do i send crabs through the internet?

[the-staff-official]

horny people have no rights. horny people are NOT protected under the constitution. if you are horny i WILL find you and then you will be sorry buster. unfollow me right fucking now of you are horny, have ever been horny, or ever will be horny. this is not a joke. please leave.

[the-staff-official]

When will the blog purge of 2020 happen?

2027

[the-staff-official]

Look we did it early! Aren't you proud of us 😇

[fishbians]

guys @staff isnt home

[the-staff-official]

ಠ_ಠ

[staff]

Announcing…

Three new features for posting from the mobile app

First, you can add images to reblogs. You asked for it, you got it.

Second, new text styles for your new text posts. Headers, lists, serifs, silly cursive, serious typewriter. Look!

Lastly, intriguingly, you can drag paragraphs and images around to reorder them. Witness it:

Have fun with all this, Tumblr 😘

[the-staff-official]

These new fonts are pretty and all, but they're so big that it looks like everyone's yelling now.

They are

[the-staff-official]

When will the blog purge of 2020 happen?

2027

[the-staff-official]

Is this the real Tumblr staff?

Obviously

[roguejedis-deactivated20170921]

us: hey tumblr can you like do something about the thousands of pornbots lol

tumblr, unveiling “safe mode” and forcibly blocking any posts having to do with being gay while blocking other random harmless posts but leaving the pornbots untouched:

[the-staff-official]

Ummmmm,,,,,,,,porn bots??? For what do you mean please??? We have save the children from the Dreaded Gay™ ur welcome.

[the-staff-official]

I think you mean porn blogs have fore skin. Not thick skin.

not all of them

[the-staff-official]

How are you guys gonna make the tumblr logo now that MS paint is gone?

we will hand draw the new tumblr logo and update the website soon. heres some things to expect in the update!

1. New logo

2. Whatever fuckery our CEO ferret comes up with running around on the keyboard

[the-staff-official]

My dashboard says you're answering asks. Is that true?

nah

[the-staff-official]

also "sensitive content" is filtered but a ton of actual porn blogs keep following me, i can still see the content that's meant to be filtered out

the porn blogs arent sensitive most of them have thick skin really

[the-staff-official]

this is one of my favorite blogs. i love you, and i also love the few people who inexplicably seem to think you're the actual staff, despite the fact that it's literally in your description that you aren't. goddamn, people are amazing. anyway, bless you for running this blog, it has brightened my work day.

how they believe that a group of people expressing no actual interest in the enjoyment of users on this site is the actual staff is beyond me

[the-staff-official]

Fiks youe're fuckihn wovsit.

thakn you

[the-staff-official]

Will you answer this ask?

i mean yeah basically thats the plan, but mostly because we’ve come to like you

[the-staff-official]

Is there anyway to change your age on tumblr I accidentally put in the wrong one so now I can see explicit content I'm literally 19 but I put it in by accident that I'm 5

you are 5 now, sorry. puberty will begin to slowly reverse until you are 5 again and live again as a 5 year old