Howdy. @thebee2man - Tumblr Blog

holy shit this blog still exists

hi! im transgender now

i miss u u r one of the funnies people ive ever met

Anon... I hear you. I know it's been literally 93 days and you have probably since decomposed into a fine powder but you can always find me on Discord at #FoofFighters#8875. That's always an option you have.

So...

Is Tumblr as dead as I think it is?

cheaphalloweencostume

courier 6 rolls up to the tops casino with a freshly bandaged bullet wound to the head they’re greasy and dusty and covered in blood and probably vomit they smell like all of the above plus body odor that would peel the skin off a death claw and they walk their stupid ass up to benny and theyre like “howdy fuck freak as you can see the bullet didnt take. you didnt do it right. im going to peg you now” and bennys like well thats just fine

sleenie

blackarachnya

akron-squirrel-reblogs

girlidiotdotcom-deactivated2023

servalias

the-axeyist-axe-deactivated2020

@where-the-fuck-is-he

pousseyluv

glumshoe

My cat has ice cream prescience.

I don’t know how she does it. I don’t know how she reads my intent so clearly.

When I walk to the kitchen to get a popsicle or thaw a slice of banana bread or warm up some mango slices, she doesn’t care. She stays on her chair and waits patiently.

But when I walk to the kitchen to scoop myself a bowl of ice cream, she’s at my heels SHRIEKING by the time I turn on the light. She knows. She’s not smelling it, she’s not hearing me say ‘ice cream’, she’s not accustomed to some predictable pattern because I rarely eat ice cream.

But she fucking figures out before I even reach the refrigerator. It’s the only human food she asks for, and I have to give her a small tithe of it to keep her from shredding the skin from my legs and popping my eardrums. She’s terrifying.

cipheramnesia

Registering the unique “ice cream gait”, try walking without rhythm so the cat will not be able to track your movements.

glumshoe

But what if it’s not my Ice Cream Groove… what if I excuse pheromones of Ice Cream Intent?

There have to be ways to thwart her Ice Cream Knowledge. Perhaps I will have to trick myself into believing that I’m actually getting up to thaw leftovers, and then I’ll start exuding Leftover Intent pheromones.

glumshoe

I DID IT!

I got up to make myself a cup of tea, thought Tea Thoughts, and then at the last moment I filled my tea cup with ice cream instead of tea.

My cat didn’t even notice. She didn’t smell it, or pester me while I was eating, or come running and yodeling her need when I opened the freezer.

I am free.