The Butt Slicer

I'M RÉMUS! INVADING AND CHAOS IS IN MY GENES! Open for asks! || banner picture is made by @Haissitall).

[ask-the-fishdick-deactivated201]

REBLOG IF IT IS OKAY TO COME INTO YOUR INBOX AND SAY THE RANDOMEST SHIT I CAN THINK OF BECAUSE I REALLY WANT TO INTERACT WITH YOU.

[thebuttslicer]

I NEED ATTENTION

GIVE ME ATTENTION

[thebuttslicer]

GHOST NOTIFICATIONS

I don't see notif in my notif and tumblr still says I have a notification? 👀👀👀

Ghosts or been eaten

BITE

[pepsinister]

tw: broken frontal bone tw: broken left parietal bone tw: broken right parietal bone tw: broken left temporal bone tw: broken right temporal bone tw: broken occipital bone tw: broken sphenoid bone tw: broken ethmoid bone tw: broken mandible tw: broken left maxilla tw: broken right maxilla tw: broken left palantine bone tw: broken right palantine bone tw: broken left zygomatic bone tw: broken right zygomatic bone tw: broken left nasal bone tw: broken right nasal bone tw: broken left lacrimal bone tw: broken right lacrimal bone tw: broken vomer tw: broken left nasal conchae tw: broken right nasal conchae tw: broken left malleus tw: broken right malleus tw: broken left incus tw: broken right incus tw: broken left stapes tw: broken right stapes tw: broken hyoid tw: broken left scapula tw: broken right scapula tw: broken left clavicle tw: broken right clavicle tw: broken sternum tw: broken left rib 1 tw: broken left rib 2 tw: broken left rib 3 tw: broken left rib 4 tw: broken left rib 5 tw: broken left rib 6 tw: broken left rib 7 tw: broken left rib 8 tw: broken left rib 9 tw: broken left rib 10 tw: broken left rib 11 tw: broken left rib 12 tw: broken right rib 1 tw: broken right rib 2 tw: broken right rib 3 tw: broken right rib 4

tw: broken right rib 5 tw: broken right rib 6 tw: broken right rib 7 tw: broken right rib 8 tw: broken right rib 9 tw: broken right rib 10 tw: broken right rib 11 tw: broken right rib 12 tw: broken cervical vertebra 1 tw: broken cervical vertebra 2 tw: broken cervical vertebra 3 tw: broken cervical vertebra 4 tw: broken cervical vertebra 5 tw: broken cervical vertebra 6 tw: broken cervical vertebra 7 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 1 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 2 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 3 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 4 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 5 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 6 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 7 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 8 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 9 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 10 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 11 tw: broken thoracic vertebra 12 tw: broken lumbar vertebra 1 tw: broken lumbar vertebra 2 tw: broken lumbar vertebra 3 tw: broken lumbar vertebra 4 tw: broken lumbar vertebra 5 tw: broken sacrum tw: broken coccyx tw: broken left humerus tw: broken right humerus tw: broken left radius tw: broken right radius tw: broken left ulna tw: broken right ulna tw: broken left scaphoid bone tw: broken right scaphoid bone tw: broken left lunate bone tw: broken right lunate bone tw: broken left triquetral bone tw: broken right triquetral bone tw: broken left pisiform bone

tw: broken right pisiform bone tw: broken left trapezium tw: broken right trapezium tw: broken left trapezoid bone tw: broken right trapezoid bone tw: broken left capitate bone tw: broken right capitate bone tw: broken left hamate bone tw: broken right hamate bone tw: broken left metacarpal 1 bone tw: broken left metacarpal 2 bone tw: broken left metacarpal 3 bone tw: broken left metacarpal 4 bone tw: broken left metacarpal 5 bone tw: broken right metacarpal 1 bone tw: broken right metacarpal 2 bone tw: broken right metacarpal 3 bone tw: broken right metacarpal 4 bone tw: broken right metacarpal 5 bone tw: broken left proximal phalanx 1 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 2 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 3 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 4 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 5 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 1 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 2 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 3 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 4 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 5 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 5 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 2 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 3 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 4 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 5 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 2 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 3 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 4 tw: broken left distal phalanx 1 tw: broken left distal phalanx 2 tw: broken left distal phalanx 3 tw: broken left distal phalanx 4 tw: broken left distal phalanx 5 tw: broken right distal phalanx 1 tw: broken right distal phalanx 2 tw: broken right distal phalanx 3 tw: broken right distal phalanx 4 tw: broken right distal phalanx 5 tw: broken left innominate bone tw: broken right innominate bone tw: broken left femur tw: broken right femur

tw: broken left patella tw: broken right patella tw: broken left tibia tw: broken right tibia tw: broken left fibula tw: broken right fibula tw: broken left calcaneus tw: broken right calcaneus tw: broken left talus tw: broken right talus tw: broken left navicular bone tw: broken right navicular bone tw: broken left medial cuneiform bone tw: broken right medial cuneiform bone tw: broken left intermediate cuneiform bone tw: broken right intermediate cuneiform bone tw: broken left lateral cuneiform bone tw: broken right lateral cuneiform bone tw: broken left cuboid bone tw: broken right cuboid bone tw: broken left metatarsal 1 bone tw: broken left metatarsal 2 bone tw: broken left metatarsal 3 bone tw: broken left metatarsal 4 bone tw: broken left metatarsal 5 bone tw: broken right metatarsal 1 bone tw: broken right metatarsal 2 bone tw: broken right metatarsal 3 bone tw: broken right metatarsal 4 bone tw: broken right metatarsal 5 bone tw: broken left proximal phalanx 1 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 2 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 3 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 4 tw: broken left proximal phalanx 5 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 1 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 2 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 3 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 4 tw: broken right proximal phalanx 5 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 1 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 2 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 3 tw: broken left intermediate phalanx 4 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 1 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 2 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 3 tw: broken right intermediate phalanx 4 tw: broken left distal phalanx 1 tw: broken left distal phalanx 2 tw: broken left distal phalanx 3 tw: broken left distal phalanx 4 tw: broken left distal phalanx 5 tw: broken right distal phalanx 1 tw: broken right distal phalanx 2 tw: broken right distal phalanx 3 tw: broken right distal phalanx 4 tw: broken right distal phalanx 5

tw: bruising

just had a bad accident

[vexcite]

[parkchanwoohoo]

I'm in fucking stitches dude

[catbreon-draws]

I’m p

Yes I’m

Yes hmmms ow

Eh

Tnhk

[catbreon-draws]

Tumblr wouldn’t let me upload the video but I let the mice write a tumblr post for me and this is the result :^)

[ohfuck-abastard-deactivated2023]

i thought that was just. a regular tumblr post and accepted it

[chatmeow9]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

[theshitpostcalligrapher]

req'd by @ruunkur

oh god what is their verdict

text: BUt the snails, the snails have *spoken*

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

i was watching a video about how regional cheeses are made around the world, and was shown a type of mozzarella called zizzona (the z/zz pronounced like the 'zz' in 'pizza', with a 'tz' sound), which, yes, means "mother's breast".

so rest easy tonight knowing they have titty cheese in italy.

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

they also make special GIANT 66lb zizzona

so rest easy tonight knowing they have hummina hummina aWOOGAH iyiyiyiyi GAZONGA cheese in italy

[sociallyunacceptableart4]

This was my art school’s water fountain. Drink from them wolf tiddies

[emcapi]

good evening everyone i am here to inform you about the single funniest fucking piece of fishing gear in existence

it is called a fish fighting belt/harness.

BEHOLD.

anyways i discovered this was a thing and laughed my ass off for like 5 minutes straight. you're welcome.

[nongunktional]

SPECIALIZED EQUIPMENT FOR THE HEAVIEST OF FISH

HARNESSES AND LEVERS, ALL AS TOUGH AS YOU COULD WISH

WHEN YOU'RE ON A BOAT, YOU CAN'T JUST BRACE AGAINST A ROCK

WIELD YOUR FISHING POLE LIKE IT'S A MASSIVE FLEXY COCK

[nsync-bi-bi-bi]

[tikkunolamorgtfo]

@seesfunbucks you can't leave this in the tags

[parakeet]

20 years of neil banging out the tunes this coming monday. save the date

[firstplacegoestonotme]

[inaturalist-unofficial]

[xiiidarkside]

[hammerhome]

manchineel perfec t place for rest under in rain

[i-wear-the-cheese]

shade very Soft and Comfort human sleep soundly put human under Manchineel Tree. Put Human Under Manchineel Tree. no problems ever under mancchineel tree because good Taste and Sweet fruit for tired hungry human. Amanchineel Tree yes a place for a human put human under manchineel tree can trust manchineel for giveing good shelter to human. friend manchineel

[thebuttslicer]

BITE

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

Pick a human trait you can receive

Can see without corrective lenses

Can hear without hearing aid & actually understand conversation even

Can walk for like 4-8 hours without having to spend the next day lying down

Can enter a social situation without feeling like you're being hunted by dogs

Socks cease to feel evil / Shoes don't hurt

The Itching Finally Stops

Can eat all human foods without dietary repercussions

No longer allergic to it

Can sleep, for 8 uninterrupted hours, and feel refreshed, on command

Ability to focus on task, until task is complete, at the time of your choosing

Voting ended onApr 7

[scienceisdope]

Why did the sun go to school? To get a little brighter.

Why did the sun break up with the moon?

He needed his space, and she was just going through a phase.

Get your solar system bracelet now: https://scienceisfunn.com/products/solarbracelet

[thebuttslicer]

Last one @funnier-as-a-system

[viralfrog]

[funpression]

sometimes you dont eat fruit for awhile and then you eat some fruit and you're like oh fuck its fruit