ellievsbear
Claire Keane
will byers stan first human second
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
tumblr dot com
No title available
pixel skylines
titsay
Janaina Medeiros
No title available
JBB: An Artblog!
No title available
almost home
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
$LAYYYTER
oozey mess
shark vs the universe
❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
One Nice Bug Per Day
seen from United States
seen from T1
seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Canada
seen from Canada
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
@thecarpenterclan
Chiles was halfway through pulling a pint for a customer when her boss came out of the back and squeezed up against her despite there being plenty of room, she smiled and pretended everything was ok as she passed the pint to the customer and turned to the next, she ignored the look on their face and smiled “What can I get for you?” She was trying to just get on with her job.
someone give me a thread where this rich dude falls for the normal down to earth girl nd introduces her to his world full of private jets nd yachts nd all that stuff and yES PLEASE
🌼 Here’s to all the dropped, abandoned, forgotten, disappeared, threads that were never continued.
May you all rest in peace. 💐
Alex almost couldn’t believe his ears. In fact, he could’t believe much of what had happened recently. Two years ago, he’d left this small town behind, along with all its small town minded people and the memories he’d made there, swearing never to return. He had bigger dreams after all, and this place would only hold him back. So as soon as he got the chance, he packed his things and moved to Los Angeles, certain that if he wanted to be an actor, preferably a famous one, LA was the right place to be.
Once he got there, nothing was as simple as he’d planned and his acting career felt like an unreachable dream once more. Still, he wasn’t one to give up and after many failed castings, Alex decided to enroll in acting classes and workshops, wanting to learn the right techniques and improve himself. Without monetary support from his family, he found a job as a barista. And while it wasn’t well paid, his charming nature and thoughtfulness towards the costumers earned him some good money on tips. Although, Alex had always been the ambitious type, born and raised surrounded by the best things life had to offer, and it didn’t take him long to understand that his charm and good looks could earn him more than just a few tips. Working as a barista in the morning, attending acting classes in the afternoon, on some nights he would assume the identity of Jax and work as a male escort. He wasn’t too proud of this, but at least he was now able to lead the lifestyle he wanted, certain that one day the tables would turn and he’d finally be able to support himself solely by being an actor.
At last, that day seemed to have arrived when Alex was cast for a small part in an upcoming series. It wasn’t the role of his dreams, but surely a good start, with a nice salary and the chance to become well known. Much to his surprise, a few episodes would she shot in the small town Alex used to live in, before moving to LA. So here he was, sitting at the town’s only pub, chatting with an old friend from high school after running into him just as he was leaving the hotel and prepared to go for a walk. In the middle of the small talk, something caught Alex’s interest, and now kept repeating itself inside his head. ‘Do you remember Chiles being pregnant? Wait, weren’t you together at the time? I wonder what happened to the kid...’ the other said, while Alex could only lift an eyebrow. No, he didn’t remember anything about a pregnancy, but Chiles was indeed his girlfriend at the time. He cared deeply about her, but she didn’t seem to want to follow him in the pursuit of his dreams, so he had to leave without her. And yet, if she’d been pregnant, she would have told him, right? Not that he was thrilled about becoming a father, but he would have liked to know. Making an excuse to leave the pub, Alex had to find out for himself, this was too serious for him to ignore. Maybe his old friend had just misunderstood? But what it he didn’t? Before he knew, Alex found himself in front of Chiles’ family home. This was a small town after all, and one could walk everywhere. Hoping that she still lived there, or at least someone who could give him her contact, Alex rang the bell, patiently waiting for someone to answer with a lump in his throat.
@thecarpenterclan
Once in the kitchen she felt safer, “What brings you back to town?” She called into the other room, still trying to act natural. Not that she did sound so natural with the way her voice shook as she asked the question. She was hoping to answer her previous thoughts about why he was here, in her house, instead of living the dream back in the big city. Living the life he’d moved away for. She hated to even admit it to herself but since she'd seen Alex on the doorstep she couldn't stop thinking about him, about them and their past. All the could have beens and the should have beens were rolling around in her head. She was glad that Alex was in the other room as she couldn't seem to control her body, her hands continuously shook as she prepared their tea. She was surprised she'd managed not to drop anything or spill something. His words from when he first arrived were on repeat in her head. 'just thought we could talk.' they kept swimming round and round faster and faster and it was actually beginning to become unnerving. Something told her that this wasn't just a casual chat, who drops round at this time of night without more of a reason than to 'talk'. Why didn't she have a reason for him not to be here. Why had she not been out and been anywhere but here. If only she had a new partner returning any minute who could cause an argument and give her an excuse to ask him to leave or cause such a scene that he’d be forced to go. The thing was that she hadn't been able to even look at anyone else since Alex and if she wasn't thinking about their baby she was thinking about him. Hoping that he was okay, and wishing for him to have a much brighter and better future than she was going to have despite how things had been left between the two of them. She'd lost count of the amount of times she'd relived it all in her head, how things had gone down and thought about all the other possible scenarios for how things could have happened. How much better it could have been. She’d even dreamed about a different life, with the three of them together. She tried not to admit it to herself, that she thought about Alex so much, that she missed him but it had brought it all back up since she couldn't stop thinking about him in the last few minutes since he turned up. It was almost exhausting, the trying to push it all out of her mind but she’d recently gotten to a point of not thinking of him so much and so she felt almost irritated that he’d chosen now, when she was so close to getting over him to turn back up. She took a deep breath to try and calm herself or gather herself up a little. "Tea's almost ready" she called, grabbing the teapot from the cupboard. Her mom had always told her that tea was served in a pot because it tasted better, not that she thought it made any difference, but it certainly took more time to set up which she was thankful for at this moment in time. Everything was almost set up on a tray like the perfect little hostess, just like her mom would want. It was all part of distracting herself as much as possible and she just needed the sugar which she had just put into a bowl. When she turned to do so, there he was, curls and all and she was shocked. She leaned against the counter to steady herself with her breath caught in her throat and made an awkward, strange noise. It was a mix of clearing her throat and coughing. Pressing her lips together tight to stop anymore strange noises she nodded at him, not that she knew why she did. She wasn't sure why this was so unbelievably awkward either, and was questioning herself as to why it was so. As he ran his fingers through his hair she couldn't help the way she looked at him, couldn't help but remember her own fingers sliding through those curls in moments past. Her jaw even then dropped slightly as she thought about it before she forced it back up. As she watched him she realised he seemed kind of, she wasn't sure of the right word for it, on edge, nervous. It made her nervous, what was he about to say, why was he really here? When he finally spoke it was like the words he spoke were in a long tunnel, and the person speaking them was at the other end, she heard them but they were echoey, and distant. In the instant that they registered in her mind she dropped the sugar bowl and she knew that if she hadn’t been leaning against the counter she would have gone down with it. Standing in the kitchen, staring at him with as blank a face as her emotions would allow, she urged herself to say or do something. Her feet now covered in sugar wouldn't move from their position, she managed to force herself to look away from him and stared down at the floor. When she finally managed to let herself look back up at him, she had to swallow hard to stop the tears from forming in her eyes. Something suddenly, without warning just burst from within her and she just stated simply. “Yes.” It was blunt and she paused for no longer than a single second before she muttered. “Forget the tea, I need alcohol.” She pushed a hand through her hair, let out a huff of air that it felt like she’d been holding for eternity, like a relief that the truth was out, and walked away from him. She rushed into the lounge and to the bar that her mom had set up in the corner. Sloshing a large measure of vodka into a glass. The atmosphere was more than tense but she had no idea what she was even supposed to say now. Why she had even said ‘yes’ so quickly and casually. She felt mad at herself because it gave the idea that this was nothing to her, meant nothing to her and it was the exact opposite. She didn’t know why it mattered to her that he understood that but her emotions were boiling up inside her and she felt a mix of everything. The truth to her was that despite this mattering to her, she knew it wouldn’t to him because she had his letter, she knew how he really felt about her when he’d left and now she felt this rage and annoyance that he even dared to question her like he actually cared. She threw the vodka down her neck swallowing with a shake of her head as the taste hit the back of her throat. “Look, I have work in less than an hour so I have to get ready.” She told him, as she pressed her fingers to her temples, knowing the tension was going to give her such a bad headache. With her hands over her eyes she had no clue if he’d followed her into the room or was still in the kitchen but knew he would have heard her either way. It was a total lie that she had work, she didn’t have to be at work until tomorrow but with her current range of changing emotions she just wanted him to leave. She also had the sudden urge to cover herself up. In all the madness of the last few minutes she’d forgotten that she was in-front of her ex in barely any clothing and she suddenly felt like she did not know what to do and she knew she was close to breaking at any moment. She just didn’t think she wanted him to be witness to that.
Jensen Ackles being a beautiful human being | Virtual Stageit Panel 09/08/20
Starter @naturally-recklessly
Alfie was beyond hammered. A boys weekend away to Vegas had seemed like the most amazing idea. To get away from his crazy family and the constant drama. Only now he had no boys, he had no idea where anyone was. Except for Eli, he’d definitely picked up a hooker even though he insisted it wasn’t the case. Alfie downed a shot from off the bar, they’d been giving them out all night and he had tasted his fair share. Moving through the crowd he mingled, a little, but mostly searched for a sign of any of his friends. He was beginning to think maybe he should call it a night when his favorite song came on. “Fuck. Yes. Tuuune.” he shouted as he moved to the dance floor. Sober Alfie did not dance. Drunk Alfie on the other hand. He moved to the middle of the crowd. “I love this song.” He screamed as he threw his arms up into the air and threw himself around. Sober Alfie would be mortified if he could see him.
thecarpenterclan:
Alfie thought for a while about the hardest lesson he’d ever had to learn. It was a difficult one. Because the truth was he’d had to learn quite a few difficult lessons in his life. Truth be told he’d gone through quite a few things that someone his age probably shouldn’t have, or had been witness to things at least. Maybe witness wasn’t quite the right word but, most of it was because of his twin sister and if he hadn’t been directly involved himself, even after to help clean up a mess, he definitely knew too much about things that had happened. Even if he wasn’t supposed to, because of their twin thing. He swallowed hard, trying not to get too deep down in his mind about all of it.
He needed to pinpoint what it was but it was difficult. He nodded when he thought he figured it out. Pausing as he thought how to word it appropriately. “Probably not to trust everybody.” He laughed bitterly. “When I was really little I was probably the complete opposite of myself now. I wanted to be around everyone, wanted to know everyone and be friends with everyone. Anything anyone said I took it for gospel because I never thought that anybody could just say things and not mean them. I thought if you said something that meant it had to be true, because otherwise why would they bother saying it. I never believed that people lied.” He scoffed at that thought. At how stupid he’d been. “Wouldn’t that be a wonderful world.” once again his laugh was bitter and he shook his head. “I learnt quite quickly that it wasn’t true. Everything changed after my dad passed. Noticeably at least, it was probably a long time before that in reality.” He shrugged. He had bottled most things up since then and he didn’t want to suddenly let all of those emotions out at once, so he had to force himself to pull himself together, at least metaphorically. He put a smile on his face and looked at Nana. “I think my mom was enough to make that very clear by the time I was old enough to see her true colors, but if she hadn’t been…” He sucked in a breath, not aware of how shaky it was all of a sudden. “My stepdad made it crystal clear.” It was the most he’d opened up to anyone, ever, and the most he’d opened up to Nana. Chiles had given him ample opportunity but he always felt he had to be strong for her. Like he had never had that person he could show his weakness too. Someone that he could show that actually these things that had happened in his life, that he’d experienced, even if some of them had been second hand through his sister. Well, they’d hurt him too, they’d broken him down little by little. Now he was really thinking about it, and beginning to open up, because this was only the beginning, he was realising just how much he had put himself back together in the first place. Before he had then continued building on that foundation, so to speak. He had caused a barrier and a wall of himself. Not just around him, it was like he was entirely a wall. Maybe that was why no relationship had ever worked for him before. Maybe that was why Nana and him did. Because he could almost sense that he could tell her everything before it had even been discussed. He would never have believed in some of the things that he felt with her until he now felt them. He had also never spoken to anyone about himself the way he had just done with her. It was like the dam had burst and the river had come flooding out. It could be how they’d discussed that they were going nowhere now without the other just a few moments ago. But he knew it was also all of the other things they’d said. He felt the deepest connection with Nana that he’d ever felt with a possible partner and now she was his wife and the thought made him want to beam with pride. He honestly couldn’t believe his luck despite how ridiculously cliché that might sound. He’d gone on for such a long time now that when he glanced at the clock he realised they could pick their new jackets up at last which meant that it was almost time for them to get their tattoos. That thought cheered him up. “Sorry for rambling so much. I think I overshared there.” he chuckled. Hoping not to have scared her away but knowing that he wouldn’t have, because she was different and for once he could be confident in that without having to ask and check. He looked at her, put his hand to her cheek and titled her head up just slightly to look into her eyes. “Shall we head off? Go get those jackets and then move on to the next thing?” he asked a smile on his face. He felt lighter. He felt, all of a sudden, like a weight had been lifted.
Nana looked at Alfie after asking her question, almost immediately regretting it. It had seemed like a good idea at first, he’d asked her the same question just moments before, so she thought it would also be nice to hear about the hardest lesson he’d ever had to learn, so she could know him better. After all, Nana wanted to know everything about Alfie, from the most important experiences in his life to every silly detail. She wanted to learn about his past, live the present moment to the fullest with him and hopefully create a future together. But right now, judging by the way he took his time to think of an answer, Nana could tell he seemed somewhat uncomfortable, something she didn’t want at all. So she was just about to tell him to forget it, that he didn’t have to answer if he didn’t want to, and they could talk about funnier stuff. But then Alfie nodded and spoke, making Nana feel somewhat relieved and grateful. Grateful that even though it was somewhat difficult to him, he still chose to share a little more of his past with her, and it made her admire him even more. She felt she could trust him, and hoped he felt the same about her. Listening as he spoke, Nana tool his hand in hers, gently caressing it while she nodded softly, truly paying attention to every word, wanting to understand. “I can understand, I’m still like that most of the time… of course I’ve learned the hard way that people don’t always tell the truth, nor do they mean all the things they say, but I still expect the best, even if I get hurt sometimes…” Nana smiled. She knew people called her naive, but she didn’t care. She knew her naivety prevented her from getting bitter, and she was okay with that, preferring to still believe that there was much more good than evil in the world. “But hey… for better or for worse, I’m a terrible liar…” She chuckled a little, trying to lighten up the mood. “So I promise I’ll never lie to you, or say things I don’t mean. I trust you, Alfie, with all my heart, and I hope you know you can trust me too.” She smiled, dark eyes looking deeply and lovingly into his blue ones, before she raised his hand to her lips and softly kissed his skin. “I’m so sorry, about your dad…” Nana mumbled as she kept listening to Alfie, and the more he spoke, the more her smile seemed to fade away. It made her truly sad that the people who should have been there to protect him and support him above all, seemed to be the ones who made him lose faith in people’s honesty. “I’m so sorry, Alfie… I can’t imagine what you went through… but the good thing about families is that they don’t always have to be related by blood. We can choose our own family too, and I’m so so happy and proud that you chose me to be your wife.” Nana was smiling again, it was a warm, cheerful smile, because she felt truly happy that Alfie was now part of her family as well. She knew that it hadn’t been easy for him to dwell on his past, to tell her more about his family, so she felt so proud of him for doing so, and extremely moved that he trusted her. Nana knew that one of the reasons why her and Alfie were getting along so well was because they tried their best to truly communicate their thoughts and feelings with each other, they were honest and played no games, and the more they spoke and got to know each other, the more connected with her husband she felt. When he apologized for rambling so much, she chuckled softly, slightly shaking her head. “Of course not… You know you can tell me absolutely everything, no matter how important, or how silly…. I love listening to you, I always will. And thank you so much for sharing a little more of yourself with me, it means the world to me.” She smiled wide, her chin casually resting on her hand, finding it important to reassure Alfie how much she’d appreciated him opening up to her. Feeling Alfie’s touch on her cheek only made her smile more, slightly turning her head to kiss his hand and then taking a quick glance at the clock. “Oh, yes! The jackets! I can’t wait to see them, they must be stunning!” She announced excitedly, quickly getting up and holding out her hands for Alfie, to help him up as well. The changing of subject seemed to lighten up Alfie’s mood and it made her happy. “Okay, let’s go get our jackets, and then our first ink together!” She added, with a bright smile upon her lips, overflowing with excitement for their next adventure together.
Alfie knew that the time he had taken to gather himself in order to tell her about the hardest lesson he’d ever had to learn, just as she had told him before, was probably too long.He knew that he’d probably more than likely made her think that he didn’t want to share with her, or didn’t trust her enough to do so, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. He trusted her possibly more than he had ever trusted anyone. And although it may have taken a little longer than necessary, albeit for good reason, he had told her, eventually, because he knew he could. The sad thing was that even though he had opened up a lot it was probably, more than likely even, that it wasn’t the full story. Not because he didn’t want he to know it, but because he knew that he could talk to her until the end of time, and still not have told her everything about him. His past, or better yet, his family’s was a long and complicated one, with lots of twists and turns to their never ending tales. As ridiculous as that might sound. He noticed and appreciated the way she took his hand in hers as he spoke, it was like a comforter, a blankie for a small child or something of that description. He felt like her small acts like that told him so much about her each time she did them, even if it was just a reiteration of what he already knew, that no matter what he said she was supportive and brilliant as always. Although he had never had any doubts that she would be. He listened to her responses just as intently as she listened to him tell his stories, and he nodded and made sounds of agreement. Especially as she spoke of how nobody seemed to ever tell the truth. The way she spoke of still expecting the best made a little flutter response in his insides and he pulled her hand up to kiss her knuckles, she was so pure and sweet, he felt like he had never met anyone so natural and real as she was. He nodded when she said she trusted him and hoped he could trust her too, but in the moment was unable to respond, due to it taking all his effort to muster his ability to relay what he was telling her. He appreciated the way she looked into his eyes after she had said so, almost an act of proof that they could trust one another that was needed in the moment due to the nature of what he was talking about. When she said she was sorry about his dad he shrugged like it didn’t even matter but the sad look in his eyes said different and he made sure to once again connect eyes with her. An act to not only show her that he still felt sad about the loss of his father but also to back up their idea of trust between the two of them, that he wasn’t hiding his true reactions from her. The way she tried to lighten the mood just a little was sweet and he mustered the best smile he could in response along with a small chuckle. It was natural, but all he could manage at the time, he just needed her to know once again that he appreciated every tiny thing she did for him or tiny show of support. When he was finally finished with what he was telling her for now he had apologised but like the true Nana he knew she had told him not to and he pulled her close for a hug. Just wanting to feel her against him for a moment or two, just feeling like he needed that closeness to help him get back to normal, to just close off the sad chapter of his talk and go about their business. “I needed that.” He practically whispered almost in explanation but knowing he didn’t need to explain to her. He had also wanted to thank her for listening and always being there. He finally felt able to smile just as wide back at her now he’d had his helpful hug and even laughed a little at that thought, helpful hug, he’d have to share that one with her, they could start calling it that from now on. He took her hands when she held them out to help him up, his smile still present on his lips because her brightness and excitement was as always catching and he found himself instantly feeling happier than a few moments ago, just with the way Nana was so normal with him, despite what he’d spoken of, but that was what he needed, for someone to just listen and be there and then not dwell on the past, listen and maybe learn but never dwell. That was one of the many reasons they were already so perfect together. He took her hand in his. “Let’s go oh perfect wife of mine.” He grinned and gestured for her to lead the way, the smile never leaving his lips, because it never did when he was in her presence.
Alex almost couldn’t believe his ears. In fact, he could’t believe much of what had happened recently. Two years ago, he’d left this small town behind, along with all its small town minded people and the memories he’d made there, swearing never to return. He had bigger dreams after all, and this place would only hold him back. So as soon as he got the chance, he packed his things and moved to Los Angeles, certain that if he wanted to be an actor, preferably a famous one, LA was the right place to be.
Once he got there, nothing was as simple as he’d planned and his acting career felt like an unreachable dream once more. Still, he wasn’t one to give up and after many failed castings, Alex decided to enroll in acting classes and workshops, wanting to learn the right techniques and improve himself. Without monetary support from his family, he found a job as a barista. And while it wasn’t well paid, his charming nature and thoughtfulness towards the costumers earned him some good money on tips. Although, Alex had always been the ambitious type, born and raised surrounded by the best things life had to offer, and it didn’t take him long to understand that his charm and good looks could earn him more than just a few tips. Working as a barista in the morning, attending acting classes in the afternoon, on some nights he would assume the identity of Jax and work as a male escort. He wasn’t too proud of this, but at least he was now able to lead the lifestyle he wanted, certain that one day the tables would turn and he’d finally be able to support himself solely by being an actor.
At last, that day seemed to have arrived when Alex was cast for a small part in an upcoming series. It wasn’t the role of his dreams, but surely a good start, with a nice salary and the chance to become well known. Much to his surprise, a few episodes would she shot in the small town Alex used to live in, before moving to LA. So here he was, sitting at the town’s only pub, chatting with an old friend from high school after running into him just as he was leaving the hotel and prepared to go for a walk. In the middle of the small talk, something caught Alex’s interest, and now kept repeating itself inside his head. ‘Do you remember Chiles being pregnant? Wait, weren’t you together at the time? I wonder what happened to the kid…’ the other said, while Alex could only lift an eyebrow. No, he didn’t remember anything about a pregnancy, but Chiles was indeed his girlfriend at the time. He cared deeply about her, but she didn’t seem to want to follow him in the pursuit of his dreams, so he had to leave without her. And yet, if she’d been pregnant, she would have told him, right? Not that he was thrilled about becoming a father, but he would have liked to know. Making an excuse to leave the pub, Alex had to find out for himself, this was too serious for him to ignore. Maybe his old friend had just misunderstood? But what it he didn’t? Before he knew, Alex found himself in front of Chiles’ family home. This was a small town after all, and one could walk everywhere. Hoping that she still lived there, or at least someone who could give him her contact, Alex rang the bell, patiently waiting for someone to answer with a lump in his throat.
@thecarpenterclan
Since giving up the baby Chiles had to admit she'd been constantly looking over her shoulder everywhere she went. Despite knowing she wasn't going to run into Alex because he wasn't here. She would double back to avoid someone that might be him or check before she walked around a corner. She'd avoided any and all interactions with any mutual friends for fear of him finding anything out and had been doing anything she could to take her mind off of things. Even though her mom had told her that he wanted nothing to do with her, so she knew he wasn't going to just suddenly come back for her, as much as she wished he hadn't gone in the first place, or that she'd gone with him. Apparently there was some letter in which he'd said he didn't want to see her ever again or something like that, not that she'd ever seen it. Anyway he was off living it up in the land of dreams, he wasn't going to want his small town, on and off never even serious, dowdy girlfriend bringing him down. Let alone a baby he didn't even know about. She often had times when her brain would overtake and become crowded with all the what ifs and could have beens, so much so that she was eventually forced to think about everything. The only thing that seemed to do anything to stop it was when her mind was occupied or she was asleep. So she'd been working non stop, shifts in the day as a sales clerk and nights in some grim bar doing whatever they needed basically. She worked as much as possible to keep her mind occupied and she slept the rest of the time. She'd had a particularly rubbish shift the night before and was sleeping to prepare for the next one when the doorbell rang. Something told her she'd been dreaming of her baby girl, not that she was hers anymore but she had to stop herself from thinking too much about it before she got upset as usual. She groaned in frustration at the disturbance. Wondering who the hell it could be. Her mom was away for a few days and the only other person who showed up unannounced was her boss, and she sure hoped it wasn't him. She was slowly forcing herself out of bed when whoever it was seemed to become more insistent with the doorbell. Maybe her irritation was just causing a repeat of the stupid sound in her head, who knew. Either way she felt unhappy about the situation and in her frustration she didn't even think about her outfit and fled down the stairs shouting "All right, I'm coming." The last person she expected to see when she swung the door open so casually was Alex and she almost literally dropped her jaw in shock. She stood with the door ajar just staring at him before eventually stepping aside for him to come in. Unable to speak she made a gesture to invite him in instead, whatever this was she didn't want to do it on the doorstep. She stood there in the hall in her lacy bralette top and tiny shorts and couldn't move or say anything. What felt like the longest time passed by before she finally managed to croak out. "What are you doing here?" The words sounded wishy washy in her head and she wasn't entirely sure they'd come out as a coherent sentence. She swallowed a lump of fear rising in her throat and looked to the floor to avoid eye contact. It wasn't until a gush of wind swept leaves inside she realised she hadn't even closed the door. She shut it, glad of the few seconds with her back to him to gather herself as much as possible. Then thinking as quick as was possible in this situation she forced a smile. "I'll make us some tea." She didn't wait for any kind of response she just made her way into the kitchen, her hands shaking as she tried to get the things together to make a drink for the both of them, cups clinking as she fetched them down from the cupboard. All she could think about making tea was that right now she could do with something much stronger. She shook her head, telling herself she was being ridiculous as her thoughts began swirling and taking over again and she tried desperately to replace all the negative ones. 'Maybe he's just on a visit and he doesn't know anything.' She thought, trying to convince herself more than anything that if she just stayed cool and acted naturally everything would be fine.
thecarpenterclan:
Alfie could listen to Nana speak for eternity. He was sure of it. She had such a special way about her when she spoke. She was passionate and thoughtful. He felt like every little silly question or topic led him to realise something else about her and always something good. He wasn’t sure anything bad would seem bad on her anyway. He felt like she could make bad look good, however ridiculous that might seem. When she said he sounded like an irritated old lady he shrugged and smirked at her. Nothing she said could be taken negatively, she was so bright when she said most things. They had laughed together more than he had probably laughed his entire life and he liked it, it made him feel almost lighter, carefree when he was laughing with her. He felt like they could find humour in the silliest of things and share that together, which he found enlightening. It was new and different with her, whatever they did, whether he had done it before or not, she brought something new and that was great. She made everything seem fresh. He noticed the way she smiled when he pushed her hair back, it was almost becoming his signature move with her, it was simple, but it also brought a closeness between them. It was intimate, he wanted to really see her, and all her beautiful features at all times. He didn’t want her hiding behind her hair with him. He needed her to know she never had to hide anything with him and he guessed this was his subtle way of saying that. Maybe it wasn’t self explanatory though. He still enjoyed the reaction it got, and what it gave him so he would continue to do it. Probably forever. He also enjoyed the feeling of her caressing his hand with her thumb, another intimate but simple gesture. And anything that was almost like her opening up to him, even if it was tiny, he’d take it and enjoy it to the maximum. He smirked slightly at the way she beamed when he said he’d take her. He leaned forward and encircled his arms around her. “Not going anywhere without you ever again.” he spoke with a joke to his tone before returning to their previous position. Placing his hands back in hers, almost like a puppy begging for attention. She brought out those sides to him, but for her he didn’t mind being a little more needy, a little more weak. He knew they could be however with each other, because they understood each other. At least he felt like they did. He felt like he understood her better than he had almost anyone before despite the fact he knew he didn’t even know every little thing about her yet, but he wanted to. He listened to her answers to his questions, nodding in the right places and watching her intently. His eyes widened just slightly when she suggested a camera. “We should get one anyway, we should detail this and all future trips, we could even make a scrapbook or something.” He stopped suddenly when he finished saying that, wondering if he’d just gotten a little too carried away, if it was actually a silly idea so he moved on quickly. “I thought you might mention something fashion related, that’s your passion, like music is mine.” he beamed, liking their similarities. Although he liked their differences almost as much, it meant they would always have something to talk about, though he was certain they could never run out of things to say to each other. If they did, it would probably still be fine, he’d never really understood the idea of comfortable silence but he thought with Nana, it could probably be so. He laughed loud at her saying he would be her spirit animal, she was just the sweetest and he smiled wide, almost with pride. He thought for a while when she asked what would be his spirit animal, pursing his lips in thought. “I think maybe a fox.” he decide eventually. “They’re sly and cunning which I think are sophisticated features more than people might realise, in a positive sense of the words at least.” He nodded. “I’d like to think I could be cunning like a fox. Maybe I couldn’t but I’d only ever be cunning for good, if that’s possible.” He sniggered at his silly ideas, shaking his head slightly. “Plus, I think foxes are underappreciated in their beauty, they’re sleek and they don’t care that they’re ginger. In fact, they’re ginger and proud.” He smirked at this little notion. He already had his next question ready for her and he looked at her as he sat up straighter. “Before I ask my next question, how long do we have until we can pick up the jackets?” he asked as he glanced at the time. “Right, next question, what is the hardest lesson you’ve had to learn?” It was a bit more of a serious question, but it was good to change direction once in a while, and they had done nothing but since meeting each other.
Nana absolutely adored being in Alfie’s company. She’d realized that much earlier, of course, not too long after they’d met, but now, the more time she spent with him, the more she felt certain of it, and the more they talked and learned about each other, no matter how important or silly the things they shared were, the more in love with him she fell. Whenever she spoke, she felt like Alfie really paid attention, and she felt heard, like she could say whatever came into her mind and just be herself, no matter how silly or clever. She felt like he’d never judge her, or like she had to think carefully about the right thing to say not to upset him or not to make a fool of herself, like it had happened so many times in her past. Alfie set her free, in a way no one else had ever done before, and she only hoped she could do the same for him. He was truly special and Nana wanted to make sure he knew how much she loved and appreciated him, because that was exactly how he made her feel. Like when he pushed her hair back, it was a small gesture but Nana felt absolutely loved and cared for whenever her husband did this, never failing to put a smile across her face. Alfie had the gorgeous looks of a bad boy, but he was so thoughtful and gentle, always making her feel so safe around him, Nana found herself feeling a little less insecure now. He’d already seen some of her flaws, she’d told him about the things in her past that made her this way, and yet he was still here, being so sweet to her. So she wasn’t afraid to completely expose herself to him anymore, not only her body, but also her soul. Especially her soul. She knew he’d understand her, like she would always understand him. And because of this, she never doubted for a second that marrying him was the best decision she’d ever made. Still caressing his hand with her thumb, Nana brought it to her lips, placing a soft kiss on his inked skin. And when he wrapped his arms around her, telling her he’d never go anywhere without her ever again, she beamed at him, happily cuddling up to him and giving his cheek a big kiss. “Neither am I, my love. You’re stuck with me now.” She giggled, the thought of them being together from now on making her happier than she could express. Once they broke the embrace, she loved how Alfie’s hands immediately found their way back to hers, a simple but intimate gesture that told her he wanted to be as close to her as much as she wanted to be close to him. They were on their honeymoon after all, and even though it had barely just started, it felt perfect so far. And as she kept answering his question, Nana noticed and appreciated how he listened to her intently, loving it when he liked her suggestion of getting an instant camera. “Yes, yes! A scrapbook of our trips sounds like a perfect idea! Where we can put our pictures and also write some thoughts, maybe some lyrics you come up with… so years from now we can remember everything and have a good laugh, maybe show it to our future kids…” She spoke with enthusiasm, not giving it much thought, because it was so obvious she did want a future with Alfie, she wanted to experience everything with him. “Yes. Hopefully one day I can have my own fashion show and your band could be there playing live. I think it would be awesome!” She beamed, loving how their passions were so different and yet could come together so perfectly. And Nana would always help Alfie in the pursuit of his dreams, and she’d be there to celebrate with him when he achieved them. Happy that he seemed to like her choice of spirit animal, she listened to his, nodding in agreement as he explained why he’d choose a fox, laughing a little when he mentioned them being ginger and proud. “That is very true! And I agree, foxes are very beautiful. We call them kitsune in Japan, and there are many legends surrounding them. They are believed to be extremely intelligent, live very long lives and have magical powers, like the ability to take on a human form. The older the kitsune, the more tails they have, up to nine tails. A kitsune with nine tails is older than a thousand years old!” She told him, smiling wide, always happy to share her heritage with him. Surely it was a myth people told little kids, but she thought it was interesting nonetheless. At his question, Nana looked up at the clock on the wall. “Half an hour, I think.” She informed, excited that their custom leather jackets were almost ready, but they still had some time to talk a little more. “The hardest lesson I had to learn…” She frowned, humming as she thought. “That I can’t please everyone at the same time, that sometimes I was doing my best to make everyone happy around me, but I was the one feeling sad… I learned that it’s not worthy, so I might as well just be me. And I can only hope people will love me and accept me for who I am, and accept the choices I’ve made. But if they don’t, at least my conscience will be at peace, because I did what I thought was right.” She told him with a soft shrug, a lesson she’d learned based on her relationship with her family, especially her father. “How about you? What’s the hardest lesson you’ve had to learn?” Nana asked with a smile, tilting her head a little and feeling curious about Alfie’s reply.
Alfie thought for a while about the hardest lesson he'd ever had to learn. It was a difficult one. Because the truth was he'd had to learn quite a few difficult lessons in his life. Truth be told he'd gone through quite a few things that someone his age probably shouldn't have, or had been witness to things at least. Maybe witness wasn't quite the right word but, most of it was because of his twin sister and if he hadn't been directly involved himself, even after to help clean up a mess, he definitely knew too much about things that had happened. Even if he wasn't supposed to, because of their twin thing. He swallowed hard, trying not to get too deep down in his mind about all of it.
He needed to pinpoint what it was but it was difficult. He nodded when he thought he figured it out. Pausing as he thought how to word it appropriately. "Probably not to trust everybody." He laughed bitterly. "When I was really little I was probably the complete opposite of myself now. I wanted to be around everyone, wanted to know everyone and be friends with everyone. Anything anyone said I took it for gospel because I never thought that anybody could just say things and not mean them. I thought if you said something that meant it had to be true, because otherwise why would they bother saying it. I never believed that people lied." He scoffed at that thought. At how stupid he'd been. "Wouldn't that be a wonderful world." once again his laugh was bitter and he shook his head. "I learnt quite quickly that it wasn't true. Everything changed after my dad passed. Noticeably at least, it was probably a long time before that in reality." He shrugged. He had bottled most things up since then and he didn't want to suddenly let all of those emotions out at once, so he had to force himself to pull himself together, at least metaphorically. He put a smile on his face and looked at Nana. "I think my mom was enough to make that very clear by the time I was old enough to see her true colors, but if she hadn't been..." He sucked in a breath, not aware of how shaky it was all of a sudden. "My stepdad made it crystal clear." It was the most he'd opened up to anyone, ever, and the most he'd opened up to Nana. Chiles had given him ample opportunity but he always felt he had to be strong for her. Like he had never had that person he could show his weakness too. Someone that he could show that actually these things that had happened in his life, that he'd experienced, even if some of them had been second hand through his sister. Well, they'd hurt him too, they'd broken him down little by little. Now he was really thinking about it, and beginning to open up, because this was only the beginning, he was realising just how much he had put himself back together in the first place. Before he had then continued building on that foundation, so to speak. He had caused a barrier and a wall of himself. Not just around him, it was like he was entirely a wall. Maybe that was why no relationship had ever worked for him before. Maybe that was why Nana and him did. Because he could almost sense that he could tell her everything before it had even been discussed. He would never have believed in some of the things that he felt with her until he now felt them. He had also never spoken to anyone about himself the way he had just done with her. It was like the dam had burst and the river had come flooding out. It could be how they'd discussed that they were going nowhere now without the other just a few moments ago. But he knew it was also all of the other things they'd said. He felt the deepest connection with Nana that he'd ever felt with a possible partner and now she was his wife and the thought made him want to beam with pride. He honestly couldn't believe his luck despite how ridiculously cliché that might sound. He'd gone on for such a long time now that when he glanced at the clock he realised they could pick their new jackets up at last which meant that it was almost time for them to get their tattoos. That thought cheered him up. "Sorry for rambling so much. I think I overshared there." he chuckled. Hoping not to have scared her away but knowing that he wouldn't have, because she was different and for once he could be confident in that without having to ask and check. He looked at her, put his hand to her cheek and titled her head up just slightly to look into her eyes. "Shall we head off? Go get those jackets and then move on to the next thing?" he asked a smile on his face. He felt lighter. He felt, all of a sudden, like a weight had been lifted.
yah this place is a hellsite but some of u are genuinely good n kind ppl & it shows
Nana was about to go out with Alfie for lunch when she realized she’d forgotten her phone at the office. Giving her husband a quick kiss, she rushed inside the building to grab it quickly, unaware of the person passing by at that exact same moment.
Takumi Ichinose was a tall, elegant Japanese young man. A successful businessman working for his father’s company, a company that once worked together with the one belonging to Raiden Serizawa, Nana’s father. And in his eyes, Takumi was and would always be the only right man to marry his daughter, the perfect union between families and companies. And this union almost took place, if Nana hadn’t opened her eyes and got out of a toxic relationship on time. Now married to Alfie, almost by fate’s design, she couldn’t be happier. But neither her father nor Takumi believed it would be a lasting relationship. Confidently walking towards the blue-eyed young man in a leather jacket, Takumi removed his sunglasses as he started speaking. “Finally we meet. I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced before, but I’m assuming you’re Nana’s little Vegas… mistake, am I right? You do realize this is just a phase, right? Little spoiled princess dates a bad boy in a leather jacket driving a motorbike kinda thing? Such a cliché… but soon she will come to her senses, what kind of life would she have with you anyway? She’s grown up accustomed to the best things, surrounded by people of a way higher level than you… surely she’ll want that back. And when she does, and decides to come back to me, the one she should have married in the first place, don’t make a fuss about it, okay? It was always meant to be this way. I still don’t know if I should take her back, but my soft heart tells me I will.” He gave Alfie a triumphant smile.
@thecarpenterclan
Alfie kissed Nana, watching her as she went back inside. Smirking and shaking his head at her forgetfullness, letting out a little chuckle. He moved to the side out of the way to wait for her to come back. He noticed someone walking towards him but thought he must be mistaken because he didn’t know anyone else but Nana around here. It wasn’t until he watched him remove his sunglasses that he thought maybe he was after him, maybe he was just going to ask for directions or something else of that manner. Alfie was all ready to tell him he didn’t really know the place well when he started talking. He realised before it even became clear who this man was. Alfie couldn’t help the automatic dislike that etched over his entire body and onto the features on his face, a sneer forming on his lips. He let the man speak, he wasn’t going to stand in public and make a fool of himself. Besides he’d learnt in the past, people like Takumi probably hated it more when they didn’t get a response than if you argued back. He pressed his lips together tight, sarcastically nodding when he said he was just a phase. He knew himself that Takumi didn’t and would never know Nana the same way that Alfie did, or as well as Alfie did. Alfie knew he was trying to get a rise out of Alfie, saying all of the things he thought would hurt, and maybe they did, more than he would like to admit. Despite the fact he was certain they weren’t true, he still had that little niggle of doubt that was now fueled by Takumi’s words. He swallowed hard though, he wasn’t going to let him make him mad. He wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction. Alfie cleared his throat and kept his voice calm and collected. “You can keep believing that pack of lies if it makes you feel better.” He nodded, finally making eye contact with the other male. “Just because the better man got the girl and you’re upset, it’s fine, I can totally understand that.” He smiled normally, and turned to look if Nana was anywhere near yet, he didn’t want her to have to face her ex after what she’d told Alfie about him. He wondered if he should text her and warn her. “Oh and by the way, she’s not a spoiled princess, far from it, which just proves you don’t know her like I do.” He smiled again, he was teasing Takumi, just slightly. “She is a princess, my princess, but she’s sure as hell not spoiled and I won’t stand here and listen to you talk about her negatively. She’s had enough from you as it is without you bad mouthing her when she’s not even a part of your life anymore. I understand, it’s the frustration that you weren’t good enough.” He was teasing him more now, “But that doesn’t give you the right to talk about her. In fact I don’t think you deserve to talk about her at all, good or bad, but especially not bad, and certainly not within earshot of me. Okay?” The truth was he didn’t want to cause a scene or get into an argument, which was why he’d kept his voice almost neutral the entire time, but he wasn’t going to put up with him talking about Nana like he was. He could say what he liked about Alfie, he didn’t care but he wasn’t going to stand by and let him talk about his wife negatively, or at all for that matter. That was the only part that had wound him up at all and he’d struggled to hold himself back trying to defend her.
Alfie could listen to Nana speak for eternity. He was sure of it. She had such a special way about her when she spoke. She was passionate and thoughtful. He felt like every little silly question or topic led him to realise something else about her and always something good. He wasn't sure anything bad would seem bad on her anyway. He felt like she could make bad look good, however ridiculous that might seem. When she said he sounded like an irritated old lady he shrugged and smirked at her. Nothing she said could be taken negatively, she was so bright when she said most things. They had laughed together more than he had probably laughed his entire life and he liked it, it made him feel almost lighter, carefree when he was laughing with her. He felt like they could find humour in the silliest of things and share that together, which he found enlightening. It was new and different with her, whatever they did, whether he had done it before or not, she brought something new and that was great. She made everything seem fresh. He noticed the way she smiled when he pushed her hair back, it was almost becoming his signature move with her, it was simple, but it also brought a closeness between them. It was intimate, he wanted to really see her, and all her beautiful features at all times. He didn't want her hiding behind her hair with him. He needed her to know she never had to hide anything with him and he guessed this was his subtle way of saying that. Maybe it wasn't self explanatory though. He still enjoyed the reaction it got, and what it gave him so he would continue to do it. Probably forever. He also enjoyed the feeling of her caressing his hand with her thumb, another intimate but simple gesture. And anything that was almost like her opening up to him, even if it was tiny, he'd take it and enjoy it to the maximum. He smirked slightly at the way she beamed when he said he'd take her. He leaned forward and encircled his arms around her. "Not going anywhere without you ever again." he spoke with a joke to his tone before returning to their previous position. Placing his hands back in hers, almost like a puppy begging for attention. She brought out those sides to him, but for her he didn't mind being a little more needy, a little more weak. He knew they could be however with each other, because they understood each other. At least he felt like they did. He felt like he understood her better than he had almost anyone before despite the fact he knew he didn't even know every little thing about her yet, but he wanted to. He listened to her answers to his questions, nodding in the right places and watching her intently. His eyes widened just slightly when she suggested a camera. “We should get one anyway, we should detail this and all future trips, we could even make a scrapbook or something.” He stopped suddenly when he finished saying that, wondering if he’d just gotten a little too carried away, if it was actually a silly idea so he moved on quickly. “I thought you might mention something fashion related, that’s your passion, like music is mine.” he beamed, liking their similarities. Although he liked their differences almost as much, it meant they would always have something to talk about, though he was certain they could never run out of things to say to each other. If they did, it would probably still be fine, he’d never really understood the idea of comfortable silence but he thought with Nana, it could probably be so. He laughed loud at her saying he would be her spirit animal, she was just the sweetest and he smiled wide, almost with pride. He thought for a while when she asked what would be his spirit animal, pursing his lips in thought. “I think maybe a fox.” he decide eventually. “They’re sly and cunning which I think are sophisticated features more than people might realise, in a positive sense of the words at least.” He nodded. “I’d like to think I could be cunning like a fox. Maybe I couldn’t but I’d only ever be cunning for good, if that’s possible.” He sniggered at his silly ideas, shaking his head slightly. “Plus, I think foxes are underappreciated in their beauty, they’re sleek and they don’t care that they’re ginger. In fact, they’re ginger and proud.” He smirked at this little notion. He already had his next question ready for her and he looked at her as he sat up straighter. “Before I ask my next question, how long do we have until we can pick up the jackets?” he asked as he glanced at the time. “Right, next question, what is the hardest lesson you’ve had to learn?” It was a bit more of a serious question, but it was good to change direction once in a while, and they had done nothing but since meeting each other.
Reblog if it's okay for anybody to message you if they're feeling lonely during self isolation. Let's get through this together!
thecarpenterclan:
Kyle kept hold of her hand tightly. Leaning against it and holding back all the emotions that were threatening to bubble to the surface. He had a flood of memories of the pair of them. The nurse had said it was a car accident.That had reminded him of how they’d met, only that time it had been a small bump, nothing major. He’d been able to fix it and it had brought something incredible along with the bad. He was sure he couldn’t fix this and it broke his heart a little. They weren’t together now, the same way as they had been last time, in fact he wasn’t even sure he could remember the last time they spoke. He could remember the last time they’d been together, the last good time, before things had ended. Lucy had held a special place in his heart. She was a complete bonus to his pretty boring lifestyle. Despite the fact that he couldn’t exactly remember the certain moments of their lives, like the last time they’d spoken, he could remember the little things. Like the way she laughed, and how she laughed differently depending on the situation. The way she used to crinkle her nose, the way she slept, the way she smelt, the way she tasted. He gulped and looked back up at her, he hated seeing her the way she lay there with the machines and tubes. He stood up slowly, lay her hand back beside her body on the bed and leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. “Please be okay Luce.” He sighed and settled back down with her hand back in his. He could feel the tears slowly springing to his eyes the more he thought of her, of them, and of their relationship. He tried to swallow the emotions back. He leaned down once again, his elbows resting on the side of her bed, her hand against his forehead. Trying not to succumb to the emotions building up inside. He could feel the build up and could tell tears were coming whether he liked it or not, when suddenly she spoke. He moved quickly to look up at her but was gentle with her hand he was still holding. “Lucy.” He whispered. His voice thankful, relieved. He was about to try to explain what little he knew when the door opened and the doctor had finally arrived. He turned his head to him, body turned slightly to allow his head to turn more. He smiled at the doctor’s words, even though he’d seen her he was still happy that it was real, that she was truly awake, he had a fleeting moment that knowing his luck it would be a dream or hallucination of some sort, so the doctors words settled him slightly. He listened to the doctors words, his stomach twisting as he heard what injuries she had sustained. “Will she recover doctor?” he asked before adding “fully recover I mean.” He felt all worked up and worried all over again, despite the feeling having settled somewhat when she had woken up. He was worried now, once again, but this time that she might have permanent damage of some variety as a result of the accident. He licked his lips, trying to gather himself and his thoughts. He nodded when the doctor thanked him for getting there so quickly, not thinking much of it until the words fully registered. Had he said that because he knew more than he was letting on. Knew the extent of the damage done to Lucy, was she not going to be okay after all. He turned back to Lucy. “Listen to the doctor, get some rest, you’re going to need your strength.” He swallowed thickly. “I’m going to go and get myself a coffee but I’ll be here when you wake up.” Without thinking he once again kissed Lucy tenderly on the forehead before getting up to head out of the room.
The moment Lucy opened her eyes, even before she understood where she was or what had happened, she saw Kyle. He was the last person she would have expected to see, but the one whose presence never failed to bring her some sense of calmness, as if everything was going to be alright. It had always been like that, since the day they’d met until the moment they’d split over something silly she couldn’t even remember now. They hadn’t talked in forever and she thought they probably never would again, but she still missed him from time to time, even if her pride never let her admit it every time her friends asked. She missed all the good times they had together, how kind and thoughtful Kyle always had been, always so reliable and responsible. She’d always thought of him as her safe haven, someone who’d always help keeping her balance when her life got too hectic. She did try to forget him, but she’d always be looking for him in another person, even if subconsciously, and maybe that’s why things never worked out with anyone else after him, until she gave up on relationships and just focused on enjoying life. Maybe she still hoped they would meet again someday, and their relationship could somehow be fixed, just like their cars so long ago. Maybe that’s why she’d never changed her emergency contact. It had always been Kyle. Because she knew, if something ever happened to her, her dad would always pay for the best care available, surely, but the one who would actually care enough to stay there by her side would be Kyle. And her instinct was right. He’d come for her, even after all this time, even if he didn’t really have to, he was there beside her, holding her hand with a worried look on his face. He looked exactly as she remembered him, beautiful, with kindness in his eyes and more often than not wearing his overalls covered in oil. The thought made her want to chuckle a little, but her body hurt too much for that. “T-Thank you.” She smiled softly, her voice almost in a whisper. When the doctor came in, finally explaining what had happened to her, memories of the accident started coming to her mind. She remembered fighting with her dad, the anger, driving fast… then some sort of animal on the road, and not much else. Only darkness and pain afterwards, until the moment she woke up and saw Kyle. Hearing as the doctor described what injuries she had sustained, the pain in her body started making sense, but the more he talked, the more scared Lucy felt, always expecting he would mention some kind of irreversible damage, something that would leave her forever disabled or deformed. Much to her relief, he didn’t. But Kyle’s question let her know he’d been thinking the same. “We believe yes, she will recover. We’re doing our best and Miss Fern is a strong young woman.” The doctor gave both of them a sympathetic smile, before he excused himself and went to check on other patients. His words didn’t exactly made Lucy feel better, but there wasn’t much she could do now to change her situation, besides cooperating with the doctors. When Kyle told her he was going to get himself a coffee, Lucy widened her eyes, panicking a little. Now that she was awake and after listening to the doctor’s words, now that he knew she wasn’t dying, would he leave her again? She didn’t want him to leave, she wanted him to stay there beside her, he made her feel safe and less scared. But then she realized, she had no right to ask such a thing of him, he’d already done more than he should just by being there in the first place. “Okay.” It was all she muttered, closing her eyes for a brief moment the moment he kissed her forehead, a sweet smile upon her lips. She remembered his kisses all too well, and their tenderness hadn’t changed, not even one bit. Watching as Kyle left the room, it didn’t take long before Lucy fell asleep again, perhaps due to the strong painkillers she’d been given.
It wasn’t that he was even thinking of leaving her there. He couldn’t do something like that even if he did have it in him, which he most definitely did not. He just needed a breather. A few moments to himself to be the best for her support wise. To gather himself so that he could think of and put her needs first, she was the most important thing at the moment, and he needed to really pull himself together so he didn’t fall apart right there in front of her. That was the last thing he wanted and the last thing she needed right now. The thing was he had been absolutely terrified. When he’d received that phone call. Sure not much of it had gone in, definitely not all of it. That was because once he’d heard her name and the word hospital, the rest after that had been pretty much a total blur. So those two words together had caused a nervousness within him, anxiety almost and he’d been absolutely scared stiff that she might die. It wasn’t like he could say he thought he was going to lose her, because unfortunately she wasn’t his to lose anymore. He was in the hallway of the hospital now, he’d stopped near the first drinks machine he’d come across and put his money in for a coffee. He stood there in the hall and let out a huff, half laughing at the irony of it all. Because despite the fact that they’d split up quite a while ago now, he had still worried that he would lose her forever, even though he probably didn’t even have the right to feel that way about her anymore. Actually, that was probably what hurt the most if he stopped and really thought about it. Even if he really tried to think, and dig right back into the past in his memory, he still wasn’t able to pin point the exact moment everything had gone wrong between them. Which in turn meant he didn’t know which of them was to blame, if either of them were, who knew, maybe both of them were. He also didn’t know because of this if he could have done anything differently, that somehow might have changed things. She was brilliant for him, well she had been. She had brought out a side of him he hadn’t even known to exist. As a whole he was a pretty serious person, always had been. He’d always felt like he had to be, for his family after everything had gone wrong, like he had to hold them all together somehow. In turn that had meant he had grown up far too fast and had never had the chance to experience the fun or rebellious part of teenage years like most people. Until her. He remembered she had been like a ray of sunshine in his mostly cloudy days, she’d brought life to his boring and repetitive existence. Sure it was cliche, but it was the truth. She’d brought out his fun side, his wild ways, as much as they existed at least. He’d actually finally begun to understand what his brother Alfie liked so much about being so wild and carefree. She’d shown him how to be like that, shown him so much that he had never even known existed, in the way they acted together as well as how she’d made him feel, he’d felt things he’d never felt before. Gone through emotions he’d never before experienced. He felt a wave of frustration and anger as he thought about the past, and he slammed his fist into the wall. His serious demeanor held him back slightly and so it wasn’t like he made a massive whole in the wall or anything but it sure hurt his knuckles. He let out a bitter laugh, noticing the people in the waiting room down the hall, bending to look around the corner to see what was happening. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do anymore. Should he even be here? Did she even want him here? He grabbed his coffee from the machine and moved to the other side of the corridor to the plastic seats against the wall, partly to get out of sight of prying eyes but mostly so he could sit and have a think. He knew he needed to try and calm down, to press refresh so to speak. He wanted, more than anything, to be what she needed in this moment but he didn’t know what the hell that was anymore. He ran a hand all the way down over his face, the bristles of his unshaven chin sharp against his hand. Holding his hand out then, he examined his knuckles from hitting the wall, bending, stretching and curling his fingers. It hurt, sure it hurt, but not as much as his head did in confusion right now. As it swam with all his thoughts, all the craziness. Almost too much to handle. He’d heard once that the body was only able to process one site of pain at a time, so whatever hurt the most would be what you would feel. He wasn’t sure if it was true, or if he believed it, but it sure worked in this scenario. His scraped and red knuckles should be painful without even moving his fingers, but his head just hurt more. The thing about it was, that his head wasn’t even really a physical pain as such. Maybe it wasn’t even his head that hurt but his heart. He was just, like always, the sensible guy who followed his head over his heart in any given situation. He sighed, it was ridiculous really. Maybe if he was different everything else would be. Maybe if he’d followed his heart in their relationship things wouldn’t have gone south so quickly. He shook his head. He noticed the time on the clock on the wall. Lucy was probably going to think he’d abandoned her. Getting so caught up in his mind had caused him to be away for a while. He took a deep breath and stood up. Going back to the machine to get another coffee before heading back to her room. He’d gotten her a coffee, her favorite, because he still remembered what it was. Despite everything, the tiny memories and facts like that, all the good stuff between them, were what stayed in his head over anything else, above all the rest that had passed between them. Plus he knew well enough, that she would not be happy with him if he had gotten his own caffeine fix and not got her one.He wasn’t even sure if she was allowed to drink it, but he supposed, as the saying went, it was the thought that counts. He took his place back in his seat beside her bed and laughed in his head at the irony of his considering it his place beside her. Still after everything. He was glad to find she was still asleep, although how was he to know she had been the entire time he had been gone. He knew she needed rest though, so he didn’t plan on waking her. He could probably do with a quick fix sleep himself actually. At least then his mind would have less chance to spin so much around in it, to confuse him anymore than it already had. Still, he wasn’t going to go to sleep. He needed to watch over her. He felt like that was his job, just as a friend of course. Despite the flutter in his heart when he looked at her. Watched her breathing and checked the monitors she was hooked up to. Yes he was a head over heart guy but that flutter sure was strong. Even his head couldn’t argue with that.
thecarpenterclan:
When they walked into the cafe it was almost like a reset. The smell and the atmosphere felt like just what they needed. Their was a happy murmer of people in mid conversation, chatting and laughing together as family or friends and he smiled and held Nanas hand a little tighter, she was his family now too. They were about to add to the atmosphere and he liked that idea. The smell of coffee filled the air and his nostrils and he inhaled sharply before letting out a happy sigh. When they arrived at the counter he began looking over the menu. It was quite extensive. All the usual simple coffees, teas and hot chocolate and then so much more. Things he’d probably never even heard of let alone tried. He pursed his lips as he tried to decide but there were so many options. He turned to Nana, her hand still in his. “What would you like?” he asked simply. Bringing her hand up to kiss it once more and noticing the ring, he laughed lightly and ran his finger over it. “Should we go and try find a replacement while we’re here?” he asked, it was a change in subject but he honestly wanted her to know he wanted a permanent ring on both of their fingers. He noticed the batista watching them and smiled. ‘Newlyweds?’ the man asked them and Alfie beamed, there was something so lovely in the fact that it must be quite obvious to outsiders. He nodded happily. “Met and married yesterday.” he told him, noticing the rise of his eyebrows in slight shock that he quickly tried to hide. Alfie laughed and gave Nana a sideways glance. The man offered them their drinks on the house and a pudding to share which Alfie thought, though he probably wouldn’t admit it, was an extremely cute idea. He couldn’t help but wonder if they made any money if they offered all newlyweds free stuff. “You decide what we get gorgeous.” he told Nana. Once their order was placed and they’d been told it would brought over to them Alfie picked a table with a small couch in the corner. “That one?” he asked before moving over to it before she even answered. He didn’t want to sit across from her and so he sat and patted the seat beside him. Wrapping his arm around her once she was sat down and kissing the top of her head and then lifting her chin to kiss her softly on the lips. “Don’t you love that we must be giving off that honeymoon stage vibe?” he questioned then wife a grin so wide he probably looked like he slep with a hanger in his mouth. “I for one hope we give off that vibe until we’re in our joint room in our retirement home.” he added with a full loud laugh. He was much more relaxed now and felt like they were back to their usual silly selves. He didn’t want to go back to their previous conversation but he also didn’t want it to be a dark cloud over their heads. “Just so you know. I expect you to be a stay at home mom once we have kids too. You’ll definitely have to give up the job and stay at home. In fact I don’t think I’ll want you leaving the house at all.” he stuck his tongue out at her and chuckled. His teasing was trying to show what a ridiculous notion the whole thing was. It was a modern era after all. Or whatever they called it. It wasn’t like it used to be. He looked at her locking eyes. “Seriously though, I want you to know, even though I keep calling you Carpenter, you don’t have to change your name. Like if you have to keep it because of work or you just want to keep your maiden name. I’ll understand.” he kissed her cheek. “Obviously it would be the highest of honours if you do want to be a Carpenter but I know in this day and age not everybody changes it. I mean, you have to go and register to change it anyway don’t you?” He paused in thought, not sure if that was true exactly. It wasn’t like he’d been married before. “At least I think you do.” he shrugged and relaxed back into the couch now he’d got that off his chest. His arm stilled wrapped around her shoulders he pulled her gently back with him, so she was leaning against him. He enjoyed having her so close. He’d never get tired of it. Their drinks and dessert arrived and he thanked the man. “Chai Latte. I think this is the first time I’ve tried one.” he commented on his drink choice. “I think when we’re settled wherever we decide to settle.” he didn’t make any mention of where that might be, not wanting to get back into anything too serious again. “We should pick somewhere close to be like our local cafe and we should work our way through the entire menu. Everything that’s vegetarian friendly that is.” he winked at her. “Although I don’t know if many cafes have things that aren’t. I mean I don’t think drinks are ever non vegetarian friendly. Maybe non vegan.” he was rambling and he chuckled. “Are you a vegan?” he asked her. He didn’t think she was but he hadn’t ever actually asked. He shrugged again and unhooked his arm from around her to sit forward and get his drink. “What did you pick for our freebie?” he licked his lips as he looked at it. “Also. I want you to start the get to know me game.” he grinned cheekily at her. “Ask me anything, anything at all.” he picked his cup up and took a sip. “Wow that’s hot.” he let out a huff of laughter. “I think I’ve seriously burnt my tongue.” he stuck it out as though trying to inspect it, knowing he looked silly. Like the silly person he could be her turned to her with his tongue stuck out and his eyes crossed. “Take a look for me.” he requested the words muffled as he spoke with his tongue still stuck out. He couldn’t stay that way for long though as he once again laughed loudly. He enjoyed being his immature self with her sometimes. Not afraid to let that side of him come out. Sometimes he felt like he hid it for too long but he was more than happy to share it with her and just be himself. Whatever he felt like doing or saying, for the most part with her he never felt like he couldn’t.
Once they stepped into the Cafe, Nana liked it immediately. It had such a cozy, friendly atmosphere, and everyone there seemed to be having a nice, relaxing time. Just what they needed after their serious conversation. The way Alfie held her hand a little tighter, made Nana turn her head to smile at him, leaning in against his arm. She felt happy to be there with him, he made her happy. As they walked towards the counter and took a look at the menus, she felt like a kid in a candy shop. There were so many options! Truth be told, back at home she’d visit her local Starbucks quite often, but here there were things she’d never tried or even heard about. When Alfie asked her what she would like, she chuckled. “I don’t know… there are so many things!” She admitted, loving the way he brought her hand to his lips to kiss it. She truly loved it when he did it. “And yes, I’d love it if we got permanent rings. I want everyone to know I’m your wife!” She beamed at him, a sense of pride in her voice. At the barista’s question, Nana nodded with enthusiasm, placing a kiss on her husband’s cheek and laughing a little at how quick Alfie was telling him they’d just met and got married yesterday. She thought most people would think they’re crazy or strange, but to her, if felt even more special how they met not only 24 hours ago and were already this in love and close to each other. She’d seen couples dating for years and never being like them. As the barista offered them their drinks and dessert on the house, she thanked him with a smile, thinking it was such a sweet gesture. “How about…” She glanced at the different options. “Chocolate cake!” It wasn’t very original, but she did love chocolate. “As for drinks… I’ll have what you have.” She smiled at Alfie, thinking it was fair that she chose one thing and he chose the other. She did love his choice of table, if given the possibility, she’d always go for those tables with small couches, finding them the most comfortable. As she sat beside him and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, Nana immediately cuddled up to him, kissing him back and raising a hand to caress his cheek. His remark about them giving off honeymoon stage vibes until they were in their retirement home made her laugh, but it also gave her such a heart-warming feeling, just imagining them growing old together, all the things they’d do and the wonderful memories they’d make as the years went by. “I think yes, we’ll be one of those couples. I also think you’ll be one of those men who get even more beautiful and charming as they get older.” She smiled wide, believing every word. When he joked about her having to stay at home, taking care of the kids, she laughed with him. “Well, if you’d be a stay at home dad as well and always stay in the house with me and our little ones, then maybe it wouldn’t be that bad.” She gave him a playful wink. It had been a bad memory from her past, but she was so glad they could both joke about it now. She knew Alfie would never make her feel trapped, and she would never want to take away his freedom either. When he mentioned her not needing to change her last name, she furrowed her eyebrows a little, shaking her head, then softly cupped his jaw with her hand to make him look at her. “But I do want to be a Carpenter, nothing would make me prouder. I really want us to be a proper family.” She beamed at him. “I’ll change it officially, once we get back home.” Home. It felt like a strange concept to her now. She knew her apartment studio was in LA, as well as her parents’ home. But that was her life before Alfie. Right now, she felt her home was with him, wherever they might choose to live together. Relaxing back into the couch with him, she cuddled up to him a little more, resting her head on his shoulder, just enjoying their closeness. Once their drinks and dessert arrived, Nana smiled happily. “It’s my first time trying Chai Latte as well.” She chuckled. “But this cake looks delicious!” Grabbing one of the forks, she took a bit of the cake and brought it to Alfie’s lips. “Is it good?” She wanted to know. “Also yes, to picking a local Cafe! We’ll be those kind of regular costumers who always sit at the same table and stay there for hours, long after we’ve finished our meal, just laughing and talking about our day and other silly things.” She liked to imagine little bits of their future together, it made her happy. At his question about her being a vegan, she shook her head. “Nope, only a vegetarian. I’ve got a sweet tooth, and I find it hard to find desserts without eggs or dairy, so… but I always pick the vegan options, when they’re available.” She told him with a smile, feeling happy that he remembered her eating preferences, and that he seemed interested. At the mention of the getting to know each other game, Nana hummed for a moment, trying to think of a good question. “Hmm… how about… a very cliché one. Three things you would take with you to a desert island.” She grinned, but then widened her eyes as Alfie seemed to have burnt his tongue with his drink. “Oh my… are you alright?” She laughed with him, the silly face he made only making her laugh even more. When he asked her to take a look, she had an idea and giggled. “Wait, hold still!” Taking her phone, Nana stuck her tongue out as well, coming closer to Alfie, and took a picture of them both with their silly faces. “We should totally use this as our ‘just married’ picture, to break the news to our families.” She joked, showing him the picture, and loving just how playful they could be with each other.
Alfie was glad that him and Nana felt so comfortable. They could laugh and joke and just be silly with each other, but he even felt secure enough with her to get emotional. To actually talk about his feelings, not just in relation to her but also in general. Which was why he knew that when it came to the time they both knew was right, they’d openly tell each other everything about themselves and their pasts, good and bad. It was also why he knew that even when he might joke and tease her that she knew him well enough to know he was only teasing, even if the subject might be almost on the inappropriate side, he was happy that she already seemed to know him well enough to understand that it was nothing more than a joke. He felt as good with her, if not better than he had ever felt in a relationship, despite only having known her for around 24 hours. He’d had relationships that lasted months, ok so not many, but a couple and he’d never felt this close to them despite knowing them for much longer. He liked it though, liked how he felt closer to her than any girl he’d ever been in a relationship with. He enjoyed the intimacy he felt with her in what would seem like very un-intimate moments to anyone else. He was already beginning to love all the little things. He laughed when she seemed so worried about his tongue, laughing even more when she whipped out her phone and took a selfie. He put his tongue back in his mouth and looked at the picture, his hand covering hers that was holding the phone, angling it slightly more towards him to see it properly. “I can imagine the response from family now.” he laughed louder, much more able to laugh properly now his tongue was back where it belonged. “How could you do such a thing?” he put on a mock voice, not even sure who he was exactly pretending to be. “When you’d only just met...” he paused and winked at her with a smirk. “And then announce it to all those you supposedly love via an instagram post.” he doubled over as he laughed then before sitting back up straight trying to act more normal once more. He turned to her, tucking one foot under his other leg as he angled himself on the couch, scooching closer to her a little. He tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and sucked in a breath as he once again took in her beauty. He smiled as his eyes locked with hers once again. Every time he looked into her eyes he almost got lost in them, every single time, and he was certain he would never get tired of that. The actual reality of it, and the sensation it gave him. It was almost like when you’re have that almost falling sensation. Like a somersault in his stomach. His smile widened a little as he continued looking at her. Then he shook his head. “Right. Erm... Desert island.” He paused, putting his attention back on the question. “Right. Only three things?” He pressed his lips together tight as he contemplated it. “Okay, well you. You’d be the first thing. I’m not sure I’d even need anything else.” He was grinning wide at her then, at his majorly cheesy answer. However in reality, it was true. He felt like if he had her by his side, he could do anything and get through anything. “Music. I think that would be my second thing.” He nodded pleased with that answer. “Music can be great for any mood, and keep you entertained for hours. Plus I might then also get to use all that sudden free time to be inspired and write some of my own songs.” He was still smiling, a grin that was so obviously a smile that said he felt proud of himself. Like a little boy once more, as he so often was with her. He paused once more in thought again, unsure for a moment what his third thing would be, then as though having a light-bulb moment he bounced a little on his seat in slight excitement. Even more like a child in that moment, always feeling free to act like that with her, it was a breath of fresh air. “Oh, oh.” He spoke excited. “Food. That would be my third thing. But not just one lot.” He added then. Pointing at her with a wink. “See I thought that through, it would be an unlimited supply of food.” He nodded his head so firmly it was as though he thought it was the best idea he’d possibly ever had. He put his hand on her knee and squeezed. “Now. I want to know the same from you, I feel that was a good question. However, I don’t want to be accused of not coming up with something on my own, so I’ll also ask my own question, and therefore you get two.” He stuck his tongue out at her. “So ha.” he laughed, his head tipping back slightly. “And your second question...” he paused and took a swig of his coffee, trying to act natural and not show that he was only doing it to buy himself more drinking time. He watched her over the top of his cup. Then when he’d finally thought of something he put the cup down. “The second question is...” He paused for dramatic effect that time, even though he wasn’t sure it was a brilliant question. He did think it could say a fair bit about how someone viewed themselves. “What animal would you consider your spirit animal?” he raised a brow at her.
