Hi everyone, this blog is dead and I no longer post here.

If I know you IRL, you can follow me on my personal blog. thx

[thabeehive-deactivated20160215]

lil’ kim, as joan of arc, styled by marc jacobs for flaunt magazine (circa 2005).

church.

[dattinator]

[semiconductorwave]

[asciiheart]

The nuclear family is probably the greatest enabler of child abuse, ever.

Putting two people in complete control of another person (who is particularly vulnerable and has few legal rights) and then having no oversight for the whole arrangement is the absolute worst idea.

Families are garbage.

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Hahaha wtf

[yourownpetard]

I wouldn’t even know where to start with this. omg.

[amal-wa-ahlam]

OP, what would you propose as an alternative to families?

[asciiheart]

communal child raising

less isolated familial structures in general

children being made aware of how they should and shouldn’t be treated

Some form of child protection services that don’t just believe the parents and assume a child is lying when they report abuse

more legal and counselling services made available to children

[tracyalexander-deactivated20201]

I don’t get people that are like “lol, what? that’s so weird, lets laugh at the very notion that traditional families are abusive”.

[itsfridaybutimstillaro-deactiva]

communal child raising is the traditional family. 70-100 years ago 4 generations lived together in the same house, having 4 grandparents, 6 aunts and 15 cousins around every day was normal.

[queeranarchism]

Things that should be mentioned:

- These communities are not necessarily connected by an biological ties. In a lot of these multigenerational ‘families’, including people in the family who are not relatives or married into the family is totally normal. This has always created a lot more space to support people without families, support people who do now want to partner up and to create communities in which couples who can not have children (like some queer couples but not all & other couples too) can be a part of child raising. 

- Having a lot more young people around often means young people learn from each other. In many cultures young people form a non-hierarchial group that learns together and can do a great deal without adult supervision. 

The nuclear family doesn’t just facilitate abuse, it facilitates hierarchy. It’s a training school for obedience to authority. 

Now, which system would push such a training school strongly so it could get docile obedient citizens? Which system whould push the nuclear family. 

I’m not saying it’s capitalism but it’s capitalism. 

And then there’s the fact that the 2 parent, nuclear family can be most easily pushed into the pattern where one adult works an extremely exhausting job many hours a day that leaves that adult hardly capable of doing anything else, while the other adult takes on all the other things that adult would otherwise have done: care for children, clean the living space, prepare food, prepare clean clothing, etc. for free. What we know as traditional gender roles. 

This way capitalism gets one intensely loyal worker who feels ‘responsible’ for ‘supporting a family’ while all the work to keep that worker going is done for free by an unpaid worker in the home. 

And, you know, communities need a lot less stuff. A community of 50 can do just fine with one or two hammers. 25 nuclear families need 25 hammers. The nuclear family demands a huge amount of commodity purchasing. 

[thehighpriestofreverseracism]

🆘🆘🆘🆘🆘😭😭😭😭

[rackletang]

[daughterofmulan-deactivated2018]

The Glorification of White Crime

Take a facet of crime, and then look at television shows/movies that feature those criminals as protagonists.

White mobs.

White pirates.

White serial killers.

White political corruption

White drug dealers

I mostly want to talk about this as a TV phenomenon, but pick a crime, any crime, and Western media has probably made a movie/TV series/play/etc. with a white person that romanticizes the criminal activity. No matter what, a white person can do whatever terrible crimes and still have a TV/movie fanbase that loves them.

When you see black or brown people committing crimes on screen, you are to see them thugs and criminal masterminds and people to be beat down.

When you see white people committing crimes on screen, you see a three-dimensional portrait of why someone might commit that crime, how criminals are people too, and how you should even love them for the crimes that they commit because they’re just providing for their families or they’ve wronged or they’re just people and not perfect. This is particularly a luxury given to white male characters, since there few white female criminals as protagonists.

If and of the above shows were about black or brown folks, there would be a backlash of (white) people claiming that TV and movies are romanticizing criminals and are treating them too much like heroes and that it will affect viewers and encourage violence and “thuggish” behavior. And yet fictional white criminals get to have a deep fanbase who loves these white criminals, receive accolades and awards, get called amazing television that portray the complexities of human nature. Viewers of these characters see past the atrocious crimes and into their humanity, a luxury that white characters always have while characters of color rarely do. The closest that mainstream TV has come to showing black criminals as main characters is probably The Wire, and even then, the criminals share equal screen time and equal status as main characters as the police trying to stop them.

The idea that crime can be so heavily romanticized and glorified to such a degree is undoubtedly a privilege given to white characters. The next time you hear someone talk about Dexter Morgan or Walter White in a positive way, it may be an opportunity to rethink how white people can always able to be seen as people no matter what they do, while everyone else can be boiled down to nothing but a criminal.

[lkeke35]

If you don’t believe this is true then look at the reaction America had to Rock and Rap music. When Rock was being produced by black people it was the sign of the coming apocalypse. Or at least it was until white men appropriated the music and then it became the best thing ever invented. The subjects remained the same, sex and criminal activity. Only the races of the performaers changed. So much so that almost no one remembers that black people invented rock n roll.

When rap music started its rise to in popularity in the 80s, it was performed almost exclusively by black people. It and the performers were vilified by the media, people tried to ban it and place restrictions on it. The same reaction they had when Jazz (also invented by black people) rose in popularity, when rock music got popular and now rap music. Notice that these musical styles only go mainstream once they’ve been adopted by white performers.

This humanization of white pathology happens in all forms of media.

[oneofthosecrazycatladies]

[for-marginalized-bw-only-deacti]

If anyone remembers George Lopez called black people roaches back in the day during his stand up. I don’t know why he’s so openly accepted in our community. And I still side eye his television show where he had a white girl play his daughter and a white Latina woman his wife. He’s probably colorist too. Other men of color are no different.

And that stand up event wasn’t just about him saying the comment about not bringing a black person home, it was also about how easy it was for him to call a black woman a bitch, which proves despite all the marching about women’s rights, people’s views haven’t changed towards women, and how people applauded him disrespecting a black woman. I feel if she was a woman of any other race people would have felt uncomfortable and thought he took it too far.

I have all the reasons in the world why that incident was not okay, and why he’s forever a disgrace in my eyes.

[traptacular-deactivated20180125]

i know that’s right

[traptacular-deactivated20180125]

[lloro-na-deactivated20210824]

lmao i really love how people in the notes are like “you’re justifying violence against a child” PLEASE black children get shot on playgrounds and in the comfort of their homes, syrian children get bombed and orphaned, brown kids get seperated from their fucking families and y’all are silent. Assuming he got jumped by other children his age he had what he had coming. If i saw this child I obviously wouldn’t put my hands on him being an adult, but if my 15 year old nephew decided to fuck him up I would’nt stop him. Y’all better learn we aren’t here for this fucking shit anymore, we’re not our elders YOU WILL CATCH HANDS FOR ATTACKING OUR EXISTENCE if you wanna be bold be ready for the consequences you pussies 

[humansofnewyork]

“My husband and I sold everything we had to afford the journey. We worked 15 hours a day in Turkey until we had enough money to leave. The smuggler put 152 of us on a boat. Once we saw the boat, many of us wanted to go back, but he told us that anyone who turned back would not get a refund. We had no choice. Both the lower compartment and the deck were filled with people. Waves began to come into the boat so the captain told everyone to throw their baggage into the sea. In the ocean we hit a rock, but the captain told us not to worry. Water began to come into the boat, but again he told us not to worry. We were in the lower compartment and it began to fill with water. It was too tight to move. Everyone began to scream. We were the last ones to get out alive. My husband pulled me out of the window. In the ocean, he took off his life jacket and gave it to a woman. We swam for as long as possible. After several hours he told me he that he was too tired to swim and that he was going to float on his back and rest. It was so dark we could not see. The waves were high. I could hear him calling me but he got further and further away. Eventually a boat found me. They never found my husband.” (Kos, Greece)

[birdcagesanddemons]

Just some things to chew on. For people who have never considered the other perspective.

[caringcoffeechats]

Not everything happens for a reason. Some things happen purely because evil exists in the world. That did not happen to you because you deserved it. It didn’t happen to you because you needed to learn a lesson. There are lessons you can learn without experiencing pain.

[jay-walden]

I remember the days I prayed for the things I have now.

(via jay-walden)

[dragonageheadlines]

Top 10 of 2016!

#10

#9

#8

#7

#6

#5

#4

#3

#2

#1

[thefemcritique]

In my opinion, the most dangerous stereotype and one that allows racism to flourish is the one that “racists” are people who live in southern or flyover states, shop at WalMart, are Evangelical Christians, do not go to college, and vote Republican. A lot of urban, non-Christian, educated “progressives” like Lena Dunham do a good job of convincing themselves that they are not racist, b/c they drink espresso, and listen to jazz or Mos Def, and live in cities, voted for Obama and sometimes have sex with POC, and as a result, they give themselves free reign to engage in racism on a regular basis.

Commenter nicthommi in a discussion of Lena Dunham on Racialicious (via thefemcritique)

!!!!!!!!!!!

(via audrelawwd)

[reverseracism]

Apparently Woody McClain from BET’s #NewEdition tweeted this back in 2011.

It’s been trending for a few hours now. *sigh* at least it’s out in the public before too many Black Women cap for him.

[smartypants1111j]

Life comes at you fast

[nyreelovemenot]

2011? I wanna believe he’s grown by then.

[luvheritage]

Not trusting it. Unless we see evidence of that growth. Which I doubt we’re gonna find.

[reverseracism]

6 years ago is a long time. He may have changed in that time he may have not. When we’re younger we definitely more ignorant due to lack of information or experience.

His PR could be breaking their backs right now telling him to talk only about dark skinned Black Women to water down what he has said in the past. He owes me nothing and quite frankly I have not and probably will not be checking on him and his actions.

I just thought I would share knowledge before some women get invested with support only to get your heart broken.

[feminist77-deactivated20150228]

Many white women have said to me, ‘We wanted black women and non-white women to join the movement,’ totally unaware of their perception that they somehow ‘own’ the movement, that they are the ‘hosts’ inviting us as ‘guests.’

bell hooks, “Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center” (via straightbacksnohangtime)