how are the types w/ crushes and flirting?
INFP: INFP has already envisioned an entire life together, but you’ll never know because they jump into the bushes every time they see you. INFP brings spare bushes in their backpack in the event that they run into you in a desert.
ENFP: Did you ever have personal space? Don’t get used to it. You wake up one day to find ENFP has moved into your house. ENFP has always been there.
INFJ: INFJ sacrifices goats to the spirits for guidance and invests in magic herbs. Maybe don’t drink that tea they just gave you.
ENFJ: ENFJ asks if you need help on your homework, and before you know it, you’ve told them your deepest darkest secrets. How did that happen? ENFJ has never felt more alive.
ISFJ: Melts into a pool of tepid rose-scented water. Oops.
ESFJ: Over a period of months, ESFJ amasses a comprehensive database of information on you. One day, you mention you’re thirsty and ESFJ offers you your favorite drink. “How did you-” you begin. “What?” says ESFJ. “Here, have a cookie.”
ISTJ: “Siri, how does one flirt? Asking for a friend.”
ESTJ: “I have a romantic interest in you. Is it reciprocated? Please RSVP to my secretary by Wednesday.”
INTP: Says nothing. Little do you know that their “anxious tapping” on the table is actually a binary profession of love.
ENTP: ENTPs flirt with everyone except the people they actually like.
INTJ: INTJ has written a series of algorithms for interaction with you. “Hi INTJ,” you say and touch INTJ on the shoulder. INTJ was not prepared for this. Error: self destruct. INTJ bursts into flames.
ENTJ: “You. Me. Dinner. Tonight.” Refuse at your own risk.
ISFP: Hires a group of friends to surround them and have fun at all times. ISFP is such a fun person, always laughing, you think.
ESFP: Takes a cue from the male anglerfish and physically attaches to you.
ISTP: Frustrated with cumbersome emotions, ISTP performs a self-lobotomy at home with a wrench and some pliers. ISTP has trouble with fine motor function for the rest of their life, but DIY surgery is otherwise successful.
ESTP: *smolders* You’re done for.
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