The Electric Servant

Call me--Just don't say the name.

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I’m seriously sitting here now using the slider as the whole smoking device, like we did in Baltimore when the bong broke and Travis was too lazy to go to the smoke shop.

That time, the slider itself also broke after a week or so of it being our only piece, I’m too shaky to roll good joints, someone there didn’t like blunts so this girl Ashley seriously rigged a PBR can and the whole house just used that for... I lived there maybe 3 more weeks and the same can was still being used somehow.

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A buy a friggin $50 bong half on impulse, thing works great for 3 days and then literally breaks in 2 pieces when I pick it up. This wasn’t some kind of accident while I was messed up, I mean the stem of this vase-shaped thing pulled in 2..

And of course there’s no refunds on glass pieces

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My Dad said 'being in a church doesn't make you a Christian more than being in a garage makes you an automobile' and at the moment he spoke these words I was taken up in a snake-like pattern of glowing lights that shined like gold... like a DNA spiral sort of shape, and when they unified at the top I realized I WAS God, this infinite consciousness fragmenting itself into a piece just to observe itself. When the experience wore down, my Dad said it was probably time we all started going to Wednesday night church again, and not just Sunday morning praise and worship anymore.

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i have a truth for you to speak into reality: it’s called getting a j-o-b

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pray to your “god” SEE WHOS LISTENING

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LOOP3--I’m Illuminati Disinfo

The first single from “$33 Million in Bank of America Checking Account”

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This is the only girl who never complains to me

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sometimes when you just at home sittin on the couch daydreamin and your bitch just gettin on your motherfuckin nerves then you geeked up too, fuck it

Ann Shulgin

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The thing a lot of people don’t realize about the whole Illuminati thing is that the idea got its start in rural Pennsylvania, where I’m originally from. The Amish got this idea back in the 50s or 60s and have been running with the ball ever since, and the idea of an actual secret society that directly serves Satan was originally propagated by Christian conspiracy lecturers who got their start within an hour radius of my hometown a long time before Dan Brown was writing novels or celebrities were covering one eye in pictures.

As a result of this, it seems like the folks back home take this idea very seriously and as a result about half the feedback I get on my LOOP3 project is evangelism about magick being DANGEROUS and how there’s nothing funny about organized Satanism.

The thing is, every Satanist I’ve ever met in real life is so insecure and starved for attention I don’t think any of them could actually stop being drunk and trying to get laid long enough to organize any kind of coherent plans beyond getting together in costumes, which mostly seems to be for their own amusement anyway.

But then when I point this out, I’m told to tell it to all the kids who disappear every day for human sacrifices and ritual sexual abuse.