March 31st, 2018: Full Blue Moon in Libra. And I’m trapped in a glass case of emotion.
I bet you’re already feeling that statement. Or you’re suppressing it really well. But are you really? There’s a rising tension, a seething frustration, a mournful wolf cry in your soul. You might find yourself suddenly screaming (in your own context) the lyrics to “Grammy” by Soulja Boy:
“What do you want from me cause I’ve given you everything
What do you need from me - are you not happy with anything?”
“Is it not good enough?
Am I not good enough?
Have I not gave enough?
Tell me what do you want from me
Tell me what you want”
At friends, lovers, or even random people that get under our skin for “no reason”. We want appreciation for our efforts! We want other people to see us and acknowledge our achievements in life! We want personal success and feel like we’re getting the shit end of the stick. Stomped on by people who are or were supposed to lift us up! But this blue moon in Libra will be a hard pill to swallow because Purity Ring covered “Grammy” ten times better than the original and looking for validation from others during Aries season is a lesson in futility. Nobody will be able to award you a gold star big enough to quiet your personal insecurities. Nobody can give you enough reassurance if you refuse to give yourself a pat on the back for your own hard-won efforts. The prince isn’t coming to save you. Not this time. Soulja Boys across the world will have to analyze for themselves on March 31st why they think/feel they aren’t good enough. Most often, it’s because of something we’re doing to ourselves.
Because underneath all these tumultuous desires and angry outbursts is a small aggravating grain of truth: we’re looking for outside validation from others because we’re insecure about ourselves on the inside. We don’t like who we’ve become or how we’ve allowed ourselves to live. Perhaps even your own name, which felt so right before, has become stagnate upon your lips. So you’re desperately grasping for something or someone to stabilize us. And in this Year of the Earth Dog (which focuses mainly on the virtues of personal authenticity and pragmatism) is ruthless in identifying that which no longer serves us. There’s no glamour or illusion strong enough that you can project to cover up the skeletons in your psyche. You’re gonna have to face your own false perceptions of Self or they’ll rob you of love, friendship, success, joy…your life.
We can’t look outside of ourselves to define us. We must go inward.
We must confront that which we desperately do not want to confront. We must stop picking ourselves apart for our faults and projecting them outside ourselves and onto our allies. It’s that clawing, grasping, fearful emotion that’s REALLY putting a wedge in-between us and our relationships. But more to the point, it’s our willingness to tear ourselves down, or burden under a false persona that’s really fucking us up! Libra is usually the sign of diplomatic partnerships and balanced harmony (within self and others) but with it being 10 degrees Libra and squared or opposed to pretty much everything in the sky right now, it paints a very different picture…
The symbol or idea behind 10 degrees Libra is that of the cultivated persona, the mask we put on to try and appease others. Bingo bango! Someone in the back of the Tumblr class nailed it! What we’re dealing with is the false ego.
We’ve stopped being able to see ourselves by trying so hard to match up to some perceived standard of perfection.
We’ve slaved away to make sure that everyone likes us, our friends, and partners when we’ve stopped loving ourselves!
All of this yearning for someone else to love us for who we really are is distracting us from actually working on…well, ourselves. Who we really are, or want to be anyways. It’s a smoke screen we’ve created out of fear of rejection or pain. All this pressure put on other people to make us feel safe in ourselves is actually taking away from the one relationship we should REALLY be working on…the one with ourselves. The instant we start treating ourselves with the same love we expect from others, that’s the minute that fucking tension will leave our relationships. Because we’re at ease with ourselves so others will follow suit. Since this is Earth Dog year, people will be more sensitive to unspoken internal turmoil or resentment either internal or external. People will be able to sense your uncertainty, your inability to see yourself, and be repulsed. Why? They’re also dealing with this psychological drama too and maybe some of them aren’t equipped to 80 carry you through this League of Legends match in silver-tier (for those who don’t play the game allow me to translate: nobody can force us to love and appreciate ourselves, on some base level it must come from you because you want to love yourself). Also analyze the fact that some people won’t be willing to carry you. Are you placing too much pressure on them instead of taking care of yourself? Or are they not as genuine a friend or partner as they say? Now is the time for analyzing how you treat yourself because it’s a reflection of how you treat others around you.
Worry, fear of loss, sadness, control, obsession over a partner/relationship, rash judgments/misspoken words, muddled intuition, and the demand to be validated externally are all themes of this full blue moon. Also manifesting problems that aren’t there by sheer virtue of believing in your most negative personal thoughts about yourself is another huge biggie here.
So what’s the point of this moon besides being plain fucking awful?
It’s highlighting the areas of our lives and selves that NEED OUR PERSONAL ATTENTION. We can no longer distract ourselves with the visions of others or your perceptions of other people’s visions of you. We need to re-connect with our own internal mirror and see ourselves. And if we don’t like what we see there reflected in that mirror, we need to take action, and change it! One of the benefits of this moon is that if we acknowledge this cultivated persona, this false mask, this shadow self that we’ve been trying so hard not to see…we will get the opportunity to RECREATE OURSELVES. That’s right, this moon is about stripping the false mask, so we can see ourselves. But more to the point, so we can BE ourselves. If you don’t know who you are anymore, it’s time to take action, and do something to figure it out! Nobody else can do this soul searching for us. Nobody else can tell us what we base our dreams, our visions, or our future around. There’s only so much someone else can give you if you refuse to give to yourself.
I’m not telling you that figuring yourself out is easy. It’s the hardest fucking thing to do. But this moon, with all the planets and signs where they are, is screaming at you to live and love yourself. If you don’t, can’t, or haven’t figured out how to live and love you…give yourself a chance to find out on March 31st.
It isn’t that they don’t want to love or see you. But if you don’t know yourself, if you can’t see yourself, how can you expect others to? Most people aren’t that telepathic.
The best thing you can do right now is give yourself a chance to know who you really are by admitting who you REALLY AREN’T anymore. Some friends and lovers might fall by the wayside but in the long run, do you really want to pretend anymore? Aren’t you tired?
To all the Soulja Boys screaming out there, the point to this moon is that you ARE good enough. But you gotta allow yourself a little self-love. The only reason you aren’t good enough is because you believe you aren’t. And nobody’s perceptions of you (perceived or otherwise) can actually influence OR CONTROL your ability to be loved and appreciated. OR ANYONE ELSE’S ABILITY TO LOVE YOU. Unless you let it. The same way a boat won’t sink unless water gets inside it. We’re really fucking with ourselves hard here and only by taking it upon ourselves to try and stop self-punishing can we evolve into people we actually like. We can’t control how others see us, we can only control how we see ourselves.
Give yourself the love and appreciation you want others to give to you. Because continuing to appease others or the perception of other’s and garner praise with a false persona will only have you loved or known for who you aren’t.
Here’s some ideas to deal with this moon:
-Get rid of physical objects or psychic attachments that no longer reflect who we are or want to be.
-Meditate on visualizing your most successful and fulfilled version of yourself. Then write a detailed list describing everything about that version of yourself. Burn it in the flame of a white candle.
-Treat yourself to something nice like a relaxing bath, a refreshing walk to your local park, reconnect with nature and spend time underneath a tree, smell some flowers, exercise, watch a funny comedy.
-Cry. Actually just let it all out and cry. Give yourself all the room to vent that you need. Hell, maybe put all that emotion into an art piece or some writing!
-Do a death ceremony and sacrifice your false mask/persona so that you can live and be a more genuine and fulfilled individual. *
-Cry and put food near your bed and stay hydrated. *
-Pretend all negative/intrusive self-talk is being spoken in the voice of Gilbert Gottfried. *
-Maybe it’s actually time to say goodbye and have that hard talk with your partner that you’ve been putting off or ignoring.*
-Talk to your Tarot or Oracle cards.
The point is that when confronted with all this worry and fear and unexpressed energy…we need to DO something with it. Something transformational that speaks true to who we are even if that transformational something…is just allowing yourself the curiosity of wanting to live one more day…
To see what your future can hold. To give yourself a shred of hope to see what you can become.
dededos
theartofmadeline
germansingergirl
snowghoul
gummygunk
yousharknotpass
