Pretty much every day when i come home, i remind myself of all the stupid shit i’ve done, the shitty things i’ve said to people, all the people i’ve had feelings for that i repelled in one way or another, and the only way i can imagine the person i love feeling anything for me is when i picture myself going into work and shooting myself up against the white wall behind the cash registers at work. I don’t look forward to anything anymore, i’m not excited for any concerts coming up, nor for Halloween, my birthday Christmas, etc.
Dear God, please take this burden from me, I don’t want to feel this way any more.














