Just a Bundle of Tantrums

Kay'Lee; 23; Homebody; Anxiety Stricken

[thelostgiirl]

Tired

Im tired. I am tired of all of this. I’m tired of living from one tear to the next. one anxiety to the next. I feel like i’m at an all time low mentally. Before I have just been numb when the depression took over. This time it’s different. I feel so many things at once. I should be happy, it’s my senior year of college, i’m engaged and should be over the moon (i mean i am so happy), I should be all happy about all these things. But everything is making me cry and feel so overwhelmed that I can’t think straight. I talked to the doctor to try to get help but she said if i can’t get better i should go to the hospital... I don’t want to do that. I want to graduate and live my life how it should be right now. I just want to feel normal and happy again. I want to be happy but i can’t feel that way. I really am trying.. I can’t force it. I’ve tried. I know at the end of this phase everything will be okay but right now i don’t feel like there’s any hope. I feel like I’d rather be gone than have to do this again. I’m so fucking lost. 

I’m just posting here again to be able to vent and have an outlet not to get sympathy..

Until next time...

-K

[bookwormingparty]

[meme-theft]

[thelostgiirl]

May 5

I’ve gotten worse. Dramatically over the past week. I feel the worst depression wise I’ve ever felt. Dalton has had to bathe me. I can’t get out of bed. He’s the one who told me I should talk to you. I have finals this week and idk how I’m gonna do it. Idk how I’m gonna go. I don’t know how im gonna do.

I had a dream about Madison ( close friend who’s mom killed her) last night so vivid I could smell and feel her. I felt like she was telling me something. I have never believed in talking to people after they die but it’s hard not to now. I feel like I was with her. It was the strangest experience I’ve ever had. I just want to talk to her again. I want to tell her everything and I can’t here.

I feel so worthless. I feel like I’m wasting my life away right now.

[sulfur]

[thelostgiirl]

April 29, 2019

Well I haven’t gotten on here in a long time. ESP after they took off the porn. Lol.

It’s been rough for me mentally the past year but even more the past couple months. I got on medicine and it worked for a little bit but now i feel like I’m going down hill again.

It’s been a rough couple days. My mental health sucks so bad. Yesterday I couldn’t get out of bed or do anything. I cried all day and had to energy to do anything. Dalton (boyfriend) had to make me shower and he washed my hair and my body for me. Which was the kindest thing anyone has ever done for me. It’s been so bad. I feel like garbage and I want to do things but I just can’t get up and do it. I’m sitting here on my couch crying because I’m so tired of feeling like this. IM SO OVER FEELING DEPRESSED AND LIKE GARBAGE. I feel like I’m wasting my life away. I’m tired of not being able to sleep. I’m tired of having migraines I’m tired of being tired.

I don’t know what to do anymore!!

[oldfarmhousefallfeatures]

Farmsteadblog @googlesearches

[crumbsicle]

give me the pricklies.

[megaelod]

water your plants 🌱

[gutsygumshoe-blog1]

[beautifyings]

I hate when people call randomly… like if you’re not the love of my life or my mother, please text to schedule an appointment first.

[51don]

You gotta let your girl know you’re crazy about her

[sleepy-kc]

Not a fan of long airplane flights? Tired of just sitting for 14 hours? Try out some of my favorite Airplane yoga poses to pass the time 😂✨During this trip we had 6 different airplane rides. 😭🛩✈️ and these napping positions are only slightly exaggerated. Haha! Warm up sketching and trying to shake off the jet lag. #character #gesture #nap #yoga #airplaneyoga #sketch #sketchtillyouwretch #oodlesofdoodles #doodle #drawtillyoubawl #draweveryday #vacationisover #backtowork https://www.instagram.com/p/Brlp_YKl649/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=o04tx1smzoqq

[foster-the-morning-deactivated2]

i love people who get excited about stars

[neckkiss]

St. Elmo’s Fire (1985)

[engineering-for-cats]

Happy Thanksgiving!

[poinsciuri]

i dont really… WANT… to leave tumblr. ive been here since 2011