At fourteen, I was a miserable angsty teenager who had just moved to Australia and really, what better to accompany a horrible attitude than to consistently listen to a record about heartbreak? I was so young, I knew absolutely nothing about love and couldn’t in reality relate to many of her songs but she touched my soul more than any other artist ever had. And little did I know how important she would become to me. At fifteen, I spent a lot of time stealing the neighbours wifi watching interviews, previous shows and performances and by time the end of the year approached, her DVD was about to be released. I begged everyone in my family to buy it for me blissful and ignorant to the fact it had already been wrapped and hidden. (badly, I might add because yes, I went snooping unwrapping and rewrapping it before Christmas Day) And on Christmas night, I escaped to my aunty’s bedroom and watched her concert with chills down m spine and a longing to be in that audience. That same year, she announced she was expecting her child and I thought to myself 'this is the moment she disappears. This is the moment we never hear from her again' and though my fetus self was heartbroken that my chance to be in that audience was likely gone, I was happy. Because she was happy and that’s all that mattered. At sixteen, I fell down the stairs and grazed my back and with Doctor’s orders, I stayed home from school the next day. Thrilled because coincidentally it was the same day as the Oscars. With a blanket and a dozen pillows to rest on, I watched the love of my life perform and then win that Oscar. I was so fucking proud of her. SO FUCKING PROUD. At seventeen, I was in my senior year of high school and was struggling with my final exams, friends, what the fuck I was gonna do with my life and all the while, she was my safe haven, my constant. I listened to her albums when I was upset, stressed, overwhelmed, happy. She was my calm in midst the storm of my life. Most people in my life assume my love draws from her music alone but I fell in love with her personality even more so. She was like the friend I needed to make me laugh, to cry with me, my reassurance I was okay. At nineteen, 25 was released and it wasn't until I heard hello for the first time that I realised how much I had missed her. It was a welcoming home. I listened to every song intently, downloaded a VPN to watch her BBC special and then pre-recorded it when it aired here. I had been awakened. And so had my love for her. When her tour was announced, being a student at the time there was no absolute way I could've made it to any one of her tour dates but that didn't stop me from calculating how much it would cost to fly to the other side of the world. I fucking hate to fly. But for her, I would've done it in an instant. At twenty, it finally happened. Six and a half years had led to this moment. She announced her Australia/New Zealand leg. At first, I thought it was a hoax. This wasn't really happening. She wouldn't fly that far, she hates flying more than I do. But it wasn't. It was real. On a Thursday in November, I got an email that was going to change everything. My tickets had been purchased. And on a Thursday in March, my entire life changed. I go to witness the performance of a lifetime. I cried, I laughed, my mouth rested a gape in awe. I am no longer that miserable, angsty teenager. I grew up, fell in love, felt devastating heartbreak and through it all, Adele had remained the most influential figure in my life. It opened my soul and I will never forget this night. If you never came back, my dear, I'd completely understand. But I hope you do. Something's have changed since I was fourteen, but my love for her has remained the same. Until the next time, my love. ❤️
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