I am a happy Oof!

Hello there, my name is Amy. It has been a long time since I was active on tumblr, and I am not committing to being back but I might post stuff sometimes. The pages below are probably inaccurate by now, since it has been years since I wrote them and there's only so much editing I feel like doing. Anyway. So hey, welcome to my blog.

[evil-britney]

*takes off my leather jacket to reveal a second, secret leather jacket underneath*

[sounddesignerjeans-deactivated2]

you mean, skin?

[degenerate-perturbation]

What an absolutely terrifying addition to my post. Thank you.

[dosomethingprettywhileyoucan]

Money spell! Reblog to charge it with your intent; the more people see it, the more powerful it becomes. Magic should be fun!

[deadgorl]

this actually does work the witches of tumblr really are out here doing something lol

NOW THIS MONEY POST I AM HERE FOR

[sassysugarnyc-deactivated201904]

Yesss November come throughhhhhhh!!

[darkcocosb-blog]

Reblogging with all my intent and desire.

[darkcocosb-blog]

I Made $750 For Nothing

[theechrysalisamidst]

I need a transition and also to not be in abject poverty

[earthshaker1217]

I too require money.

[fnb1223]

would like some money plz

[spacematriarchy]

reblogging bc after I saw this last time I found out that I haven’t been getting my orphan’s benefit because of an administrative issue, not because I no longer qualify, and got a whole year of back pay

[gottacatchemsome]

Reblogging because I just got a letter in the mail that there is still some money in my 401k from the job I got pettily fired from and so I’ll be getting somewhere around $650 dollars, thereabouts, in about a month.  I MEAN WHAT.  Witches of Tumblr, my hat is off to you.

[ourmissallison]

Money money money

[frodo-sam]

For within these rings was bound the strength and the will to govern over each race. But they were all of them deceived, for another ring was made. In the land of Mordor, in the fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Sauron forged in secret, a master ring, to control all others. And into this ring he poured all his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One ring to rule them all. One by one, the free peoples of Middle Earth fell to the power of the Ring.

[neglectedrainbow]

solidarity always 💙

[sakura-haruka]

Bonus: 

[monstermonstre]

i love how in jurassic park the woman has a phd and cargo shorts is out there solving problems and digging her hands in dinosaur poop for science 

but they still had to have a token sexy character so, instead of the usual screaming blonde with a torn shirt and tight shorts, we have him

the chaos “rock star” scientist who got a tiny bit bloody so he had to open his shirt all the way and rest his injured body in this very practical position

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

Story Time: in 2012, when I still lived in Florida, I used to work for a credit union, and I had the absolute worst manager and assistant manager. They were sloppy, lazy, and offloaded their work onto other people. No biggie; I’m grown and I can handle my job and not stress because I’m damned good at it. Problem: the manager and assistant manager, who happened to be best friends in real life, also happen to be very, very conservative older women. I’m talking like, hardcore conservative Christians, the kind who are not very good people and are very unlike Christ. I don’t make it a point to tell people I work with my business because when you work, you’re busy and you don’t want to burden other people, right? At least, I don’t. Subject of my love life comes up after a while of me staying in my lane, and I’m also not a liar, so I casually mention that I happen to be gay and I’m dating someone at the time. The change in my managers was almost immediate. From that point on they tried their utmost to make my life miserable, but I wasn’t going to break. Fast forward about a month after this mess and one of the tellers, Tanika, and I have become really good friends, and she pulls me aside one Monday morning to tell me that she overheard the manager and assistant manager talking about firing me, and she didn’t want to get too involved, but she didn’t think it was fair so she wnated to give me a headsup. Here’s the best part: these asshats are SO lazy that they literally say - or so Tanika tells me- that they’ll wait for the end of the week to do it, because otherwise they would have no one to cover my Wednesday shift, and they’d have to sit on the teller line, and no siree Bob, they’re too good for that! Too important! Too. Fucking. Lazy. Immediately I type up a two week notice at my station, print that shit out, and take it to that sloppy ass manager in her sloppy ass office. They have no receipts on me, but these people will find anything and use it to get rid of you if they can, and I’m not having a forcible termination on my record and dealing with how that will look to future employers. Keep in mind that I’m not supposed to know that they’re planning on firing me, and I’ve done my homework on company policy about two week notices (they had just changed it in January, and it was February). I give her the paper, sit in front of her, tell her some cock and bull story about needing more time for school. She looks upset, tells me to leave the letter, and go back to my station. I pull out a second copy of the letter and say: “Sure! But, first, I need your signature on this one, which is my copy of the two week notice.” Her face was a Goddamned mask at this point, but I could tell she was burning up inside. She’s trapped; she has to either sign it and pretend everything is fine, or she refuses and I go in on her for her “suspicious behavior” and call her higher ups. She signs my copy. I go back and finish my day. Day ends and the assistant manager comes to me and tells me they have spoken to the president of the credit union and they have decided to terminate me anyway. Tells me I need to turn in my drawer and vault keys immediately and leave the premises. I refuse; “I’m not leaving until we count my drawer down together, I have a printed and signed copy of my balance, and you have signed paperwork confirming that I have given you all keys back.” She has no choice. I walk out with all necessary paperwork, get home, and immediately email the credit union president telling him what happened and how I think it’s utterly unprofessional for an employer to behave this way. He calls me the next day to my personal phone, and tells me the manager and assistant manager both told him I had quit on the spot and walked out without so much as a goodbye. I tell him I have a signed two week notice from the manager, because this sloppy ho can’t even keep own story together for five minutes. He tells me to photocopy it and email it to him. I do. Tells me he is going to have a discussion with the manager and call me back ASAP. Calls me back, apologizes profusely, and tells me that I shouldn’t have been treated as such, so he offers to pay me for the two weeks I had give notice for, ON TOP of an extra two weeks of compensation, and I didn’t even have to show up to the branch anymore. He was paying me a full month for no work to make up for the situation. First paycheck comes in, and I put on my best outfit. Pick out the hottest shit in my closet that says: “I look incredible” but also “I have free time and you don’t” and “enjoy working here while I get paid while napping at the beach,” and I walk my happy little ass into that bank to pick up my paycheck like:

Happily greet the manager and assistant manager, who are both there like:

Say hello to my friend Tanika, who is at the teller line like:

Enjoying the fuck out of this show, right? Like, she can’t say it out loud, but she’s fucking living for this goddamned circus and it’s written all over her face! I talk to her and loudly tell her how amazing it feels to have four weeks off with pay, and how polite and nice the bank president is.  Then I walk my happy little ass out of the bank like:

But not before saying bye to the manager and assistant manager and reminding them that I’ll be back in two weeks to pick up my next check, “probably right before I head to Key Largo for the weekend.”  …and that’s the story of how I once absolutely wrecked two people who thought they could use their positions of power to come for me unfairly, and a story I’ll be telling my grandchildren so they know, as grandpa knew on one February morning of 2012, that you take bullshit from absolutely no one.

[blackourstory]

Happy Black History YEAR!

[badbilliejean]

Greatness.

[shiny-bonsly]

loving how my old history teacher talked about them like a terrorist group

[laborreguitina]

boost me up

[centralkvetchmonolith]

Wow okay so for those skimming, there’s a memo up there from THE DIRECTOR OF THE FBI that sets a mission to LIE about the good things the Black Panthers were doing, spread rumors of them being terrorists, and terrorize the communities supporting them.

If you think the Black Panthers were terrorists and you’ve never heard of the community-building, it’s because there was a literal government conspiracy to make you and people 45 years ago think that way.

[waltzingwithmonsters-deactivate]

i’m reblogging again (bolding mine), because people need to fucking know this. especially white americans. 

[pleatedjeans]

Three cheers for these guys [x]

[blackphoenixincorporated]

This is how to be a good ally.

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

Using their Bro-ness for good, not evil

[ladyflowdi]

So a tiny story: on Black Friday a few weeks ago I went to Gamestop to buy my brother a game for Christmas, and I noticed this older man was watching me like a hawk. He was loitering around the front of the store without really buying anything, and every time I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye he was looking at me. I went to look at the PS4 games, and he was looking at something right behind me. I checked out the Nintendo games, and he was looking at them too. I was the only woman in the store, by the way.

By the time I got in line to pay he was loitering at the front of the store again, and I just had that feeling that he was going to try and take the game I just bought, or steal my purse, as soon as I left the store. OR, he was going to try and follow me home. And I know I don’t have to explain that terror to any woman reading this, but all I could think was that I’m in this Gamestop alone with at least twenty other men and something is about to happen. I’m beginning to freak out, to the point where I’ve just pulled my pepper spray out of my purse and into the pocket of my coat. 

So there I am, next in line to pay, and there is this GIGANTIC dudebro right behind me, and I say gigantic as a 6 foot tall woman. He says, “Ma’am? Don’t be offended, but would it be alright if I walked you to your car?” and I was like “Are you serious?” and he was like “There are some weird guys in here right now. Have you noticed that guy watching you?” and then I showed the dudebro the pepper spray in my pocket and he was like “Right on. Would you still let me walk you to your car?” and I said yes.

So I paid, and waited while HE paid, and he walked me to my car. And just as I was getting in, the weird guy who’d been loitering came out of the store, saw me and my dudebro, and turned around and walked away in the opposite direction. 

In short: men who recognize that women are unsafe in dark alleys, college campuses, grocery stores, gas stations and retail stores and do something about it are the kind of quality men that this world needs more of.

[yuuri-katsuki-on-ice-blog]

Please for the love of god yes.

[warriormale]

The Warrior protects.

He does this through his Prowess, his Ability to Protect.

His fight Ability, combined with his Willingness to Protect, earns him Worth in the eyes of his fellow Men.

Train and fight!

Always protect those in need!

WarriorMale

[tylerposey]

I totally forgot you go here.

[notesforselflove]

Reminder:

Please eat.

You deserve to eat.

Your body needs the nourishment and energy food has.

Try to eat 3 meals a day (breakfast lunch and dinner)

Please eat. 

[aerixi]

[hol-hot-wholesome]

You have been blessed by the Forest Gods. You will now have good luck for the next 6 months, simply by seeing this post. You are also protected from Slender Man, Bloody Mary and Jeff the Killer. You DO NOT NEED to reblog this post, you are already Protected. This being said, do not feel discouraged, you are free to reblog this if you wish.

In short, we present IMMUNITY STAGS.

[shredsandpatches]

NOTE: Immunity Stags not valid in medieval England. Void where prohibited.

[prokopetz]

I think the perfect illustration of how absurd the psychology of executive dysfunction is that, when I’m having a bad function day, I often find it helpful to groan like an annoyed zombie before undertaking some physical task. Like, it doesn’t just make me feel better - it legitimately helps. I have performatively registered my protest against the very concept of Doing Things with whatever powers might be listening, and can therefore proceed to Do The Thing.

[animatedamerican]

I have found it immensely helpful to whine “I don’t wanna” or some variant, aloud, before Doing the Thing.  Never particularly thought of it as performatively registering my protest, but that’s it, that’s exactly what it is.

[afrodesiaq-deactivated20250629]

I also never considered the performative protest aspect of this but I also vocally register my Not Want To Do The Thing just before I get up and do the thing and it’s super helpful.

[naamahdarling]

My GF and I do this and it’s honestly so helpful.

[truly-fantastic-me]

“wouldn’t you rather earn something than have it just handed to you?”

Yeah when it comes to actual awards and fancy goods, but when it comes to basic needs, basic human decency, and accomodations, those things should always be handed to people. No one should have to “earn” those things.Value people as people, not base it on how much they produce. 

[mythiass-deactivated20230515]

yeah but that creates a severe dependency that could be exploited easily, and creates a slippery slope @musical-clarity

[thebaconsandwichofregret]

Actually studies show that people who live in places with universal income (who are given money with no strings attached just for being citizens) do far better work than those who don’t and are more enthusiastic to do work.

This is because they still want nice things and will work for those but the part of their energy that was devoted to worrying about if they have enough money to pay the rent and bills this month is now freed up to do other things.

Some people will always be lazy and take advantage of the system, but they are always a tiny percentage and it seems ridiculous to me to punish the majority and severly hamstring their abilities just because a handful of people will simply live of basic income rather than work.

[tiwaztyrsfist]

It’s been tested a couple times. In Canada, in some European countries, and the results are always the same. There are two groups of people who show a statistically significant (Greater than one half of one percent, or 1 in 200) increase in Not Working and living off the guaranteed income. Parents of Children under school age, and full time students. Among ALL other groups, employment actually INCREASED. Why? Because guaranteed minimum income means that homeless people can get at least a basic low end apartment. It’s hard if not impossible to get an above board job without a permanent fixed address. Also more people were able to have and maintain a BANK ACCOUNT. It is often hard to get a decent job without an account that can accept Direct Deposit for paychecks. Also, lost work time due to illness and injury decreased across the board. It turns out if people are getting a decent amount of money each month they can A> afford to eat better, and B> obtain decent medical attention both preventative and emergency. Crazy right? So why hasn’t it caught on? Because it doesn’t directly benefit the people in power, and it increases THEIR PERSONAL taxes, their CORPORATE TAXES, and thus decreases their PERSONAL INCOME. So, because Jeff Bezos and Alan Greenspan might fall from making 100 billion dollars a year to making 99.8 billion dollars a year, it’s a hard NO and we can all fucking die.. The End.

[dracofidus-deactivated20200523]

Self-dates are so hugely underrated.

Go see that weird experimental art film nobody else seems to care about.

Go to a gallery and spend 40 minutes with one painting, without worrying that the person you’re with is bored.

Go to the theatre and immerse yourself in the play entirely, with nobody to pull you out of your reverie.

Eat alone at a restaurant so you can give your full attention to the food.

Take yourself on a walk with your headphones in and soundtrack your life, or listen to the silence, and really appreciate it.

Spend time with yourself for a while. Treat yourselves in ways that require no compromise. Love yourselves. Take yourselves on dates.

[trashprinxe]

I have $24 to last me til Friday, what should I buy with it?

[transhuman-priestess]

a pallet of ramen noodles

[trashprinxe]

I hate ramen noodles tho

[transhuman-priestess]

hmmmmm bees?

[trashprinxe]

Are you suggesting that I eat bees for a week

[vanishinginthepark]

This is roughly what I make sure I have in my kitchen all the time along with rough estimates of local prices (MN). I buy a lot of things when they’re on sale and stockpile them. 

instant oatmeal packets with fruit in them - $3 probably and this can be breakfast all week and maybe even a lunch or dinner too since you usually get 10 packets

bag of rice - $2-3 depending on size. 1 cup dry rice makes enough for about two meals depending on what you add in. if you get cheap rice, rinse it before cooking

canned beans - usually under $1 per can - mix the can with your rice and you have a meal. chili-spiced beans will make bean tacos. Rinse non-spiced beans before adding to anything.

Tortilla - usually around $3 but you get like 8-10 of them. Tacos, wraps, and quesadillas are all fair game here

lettuce - $2 max around here, either a head of something or bagged precut depending on preference, use as a salad or on tacos

protein other than beans of some sort - probably $5-7 for meat, $2-3 for eggs. sometimes I can get bags of frozen chicken breasts in this price range and each is usually 2 meals if I add in a bunch of veggies. fry/scramble eggs and add to any of the options. 

your favorite stir fry sauce - $3ish

vegetables - $5ish. literally anything that you can 1. fry in a pan and 2. you’ll eat. fresh carrots are usually pretty cheap. get frozen if it’s cheaper and you’re strapped for cash/prep time on this part. 

alternative to stir fry:  pasta (~$2), fresh tomatoes (~$2), cheese (~$3). 

cheese and fruit if you have extra - look if your store has loyalty cards for free that you can load coupons on for cheese there’s always one it seems like.

[trashprinxe]

ahh thank you!!!

[hagar-972]

Reblogging because there’s never knowing who’ll need it.

Adding also: the single most nutritious food on earth is potatoes in their peel. Potatoes + some milk and butter = everything you need. They don’t last all that long, but they’re fairly cheap and the quickest cheat to “How do I not fuck my body up.”

(Cooked potatoes’ll last a while in the fridge. Potatoes nearing the end of their useful lives? Cook them to half-done first, figure out what to do with them later.)

Easiest baked potatoes: slice thinly but not paper-like, spread like cards, brush with oil (a silicone baking brush is totes worth the little it costs), spread salt and pepper (a little less than you think you’d like), cover with foil, stick in oven or toaster-oven at 150C for 40min. (If you have the patience, at that point click up to 180C, remove the cover and add 10-20min.) Reheats well, lasts in the fridge longer than it’ll take you to nom.

Dead-Animal-Free Whole Protein: some legumes + some grain. AKA rice and lentils, or rice and beans. (Maybe some fried onion for flavor; onion’s cheap and stays good a descent while. Fried onion makes everything taste better and keeps forever in the freezer, so frying up a bunch and keeping portions is not a half-bad idea.) (If going for the beans option - lentils are cheaper around here but fuck if I know what it’s like in your area - dump some tomato sauce and oil in; canola or soy are best health-wise, and far cheaper than olive; avoid corn.) Oh, what does instant couscous go for in your area? It keeps for fucking ever, it’s usually cheap, and it takes well to any and all added taste.

If you get to choose, black lentils taste the best and need the least soak-time (0-20min), green lentils are best for cooked stuff and red lentils are best in soups. (Red lentils + potatoes + root vegetables of choice + spices; cut into small pieces, cook, run through the blender if you wanna [stick blender’s awesome], freeze in portions.)

When possible, get instant soup mix. Get the good instant soup mix. (The kind that’s not made primarily of sugar, yeast or both. The rest is optional.) Dump 1/2tsp (or more, but start on the low end) into couscous, or chicken, or sprinkle over potatoes being stuck in the oven. Whatever. It’ll make most cooked-food-type things taste better. And again, lasts forever on the shelf.

If  you can have eggs (goodness knows they’re sometimes expensive), dump some tomato sauce in a pan (tomato sauce lasts forever on the shelf), add some oil, onion/beans to cook in it, hot peppers if you wanna, then when it’s nearly ready crack an egg or two in. Hard-boiled eggs last a remarkably while in the fridge, so when eggs reach near the end of their usable lives, just hard-boil and stick in the fridge. (Have eggs as often as you can, particularly as you have brain-shit going on. You need all the eggs, salt, and 60%-or-more chocolate you can get. Brains are made of cholesterol and salt, so folks with neuro or other brain shit need more of both. Potassium is also aces. You know what has the most potassium? Tomato paste.) Grated cheese keeps in the freezer for ever. Grated cheese will make a lot of things taste nicer. Preserved lemon juice keeps forever in the fridge. Grated cheese + oil + lemon = instant and awesome pasta sauce that’ll liven up the weeks-old dry pasta in the fridge. Slices bread also keeps well in the freezer. Try to have half a loaf or a loaf. Dry bread gets cut in cubes, mixed with oil and the aforementioned instant soup, stuck in oven at lowest until properly dry, then kept in an airtight jar to add to soups. (Over-ripe tomatoes come cheaper. They get turned into soup or sauce, then frozen in portions.)

[anextremelysadmeme]

this is a very good post but why are we glossing over the fact that the alternative to ramen is bees

[sunreon]

i have it on pretty good authority that bees are not an affordable eating alternative to ramen.

[camwyn]

Seriously, bees are expensive

[taraljc]

Trufax. 

And speaking as someone who is also living off oatmeal, beans, and brown rice, if you need recipes, I have them! 

Today I made 16 bean soup with chicken sausage and it was crazy good and I got 8 servings out of the one batch (froze half). I usually get the cheapest beans I can find, and GOYA bags of beans are usually $1-2. I soaked them overnight,rinsed them, and threw them in a gallon lidded saucepan with 2 boxes of chicken stock (also on sale for $2), two bay leaves, sauteed green pepper, onion, and celery, some garlic from a jar, about two tablespoons of dried herbs de provence,and the “fancy” bit was adding $6 bourbon and apple chicken sausages. You can actually sub veg stock for chicken and skip the sausage and make it vegan and it would still taste great.

Oh and I’ve been doing steel-cut oats. I don’t buy the name brand ones, I just pick whatever store brand/generic I can get for less than $4. They take about ½ an hour to make, but they’re super tasty and I make 2 cups of dried oats at a time with dried cranberries and that’s breakfast for 4 days at least. 

I’ve also been making black bean soup, red beans and rice, and curried potatoes and chick peas. I got 100 quart and pint take-away containers from Amazon for $20 and they all stack neatly and are perf for one serving of whatever.

[amireal2u]

Additionally, depending on where you live, whole rotisserie chickens are something like $4-$7 and are easily 4 - 6 servings of protein and on TOP of that, if you stick the carcass in a ziplock bag and then the freezer you have excellent soup makings. Using bones in soup literally squeezes all viable vitamins and minerals out of the suckers. Soup made from lots of bones is great to keep around if you get sick, it’ll feed and sooth you relatively easily and as you get better you can add noodles. ON TOP OF THAT, a quarter to a half cup of soup broth added to a lot of dishes also adds those nutrients PLUS flavor.

[jmathieson-fic]

Here’s my “How to eat for a week on $30″ post.

[geardrops]

don’t forget Good and Cheap: Eat Well on $4 A Day

[lickmetilllicecreammmm]

Yall are clutch for this lmao cuz ima need this for about the first month after I move

[watts-of-dragons-deactivated201]

Reblogging cause who knows what your followers are going through rn

[sj0]

you have been visited by the seven magic dragon balls your biggest wish will be granted but only if you reblog

[hersheyhipster]

Couldn’t risk it.

[justjengie]

didn’t realize they change colors. now I know o gotta wish.

[pinayputa]

THIS SHIT IS REAL I GOT THE JOB I WAS NUTS ABOUT BC I REBLOGGED THIS YESTERDAY maybe it’s a coinkidink but it okay just take the necessary steps to achieve what you’re wishing for and YOU CAN DO IT