Side blog that runs on queue ⬇️ I’ve been called a genius - because well, I am. DX NPD & ASPD 😇 Machiavellian personality • Rare Dark Triad female • plus a couple HPD traits thrown in 🚬 Basically a blog about the struggles of being cluster B while in a normal but hectic job with many, many colleagues and other NPCs. 🛫 Who doesn’t want to have the lives of 300 people in a flying tube under their control? ⚖️
I’m a ~psychopath~ (read blog description) and a flight attendant. I consider those the two biggest things about me, hence the url.
Posts here are just random thoughts that occur to me during the day/night/whenever, usually in relation to my PDs or job. Sometimes both.
Obviously the icon is not me; nothing is posted in chronological order; things I say happened one day may have occurred on another and posts may constitute several events over years; this is the internet and I am not a reliable source.
I feel so disconnected from the rest of the fucking world, I don't identify with anyone around me, I don't fucking understand anyone, everyone around me is so fucking bland and senseless that I feel like I'm standing upside down on the ceiling and it's fucking exhausting
So. I’ve identified my flatmate as a fellow narcissist and/or “psychopath”.
I play the dumb chatty girl all the time, telling her all my superficial business (it’s my “I’m harmless” act I play to everyone), and she gives me blunt advice that comes across as downright psychopathic (not the reason I identified her, FYI, it’s a multitude of behaviours).
She has a family history of mental disorders, a parent has BPD and 2 relatives have alcoholism. She’s abnormally independent for her age and has no attachment to her belongings or a concept of her own space, able to easily discard anything that doesn’t immediately serve her, and leaving her bedroom door wide open even when she didn’t know me at all. She doesn’t understand my strong desire for privacy.
When talking about other people she’s nasty. She’ll admit to yelling at people, she’ll call them stupid and useless and incompetent, and laughs in agreement about methods to appear the best.
She’s from an upper class background, intelligent, beautiful, skinny (in the athletic way), and has many talents.
I’ve caught her lying to me no fewer than 4 times, about rather important things, and got flustered when I confronted her. Her lies would’ve worked on someone who doesn’t research everything (or is a serial liar themselves).
She’s clever, and experienced, but not as much as me.
We’ve got ourselves into a circle of “I’m going to do this for you or I’ll feel bad” virtue signalling. Like, I’ll do all the washing up because I “felt bad” and then she’ll “feel bad” that I did it, that then she’ll do something for me, when we both in reality couldn’t care less if the other never came home one day. It’s all performative.
It’s obviously the “narcissists love having people owe them” situation. But when it’s 2 of us doing this, god damn this house is spotless and everything is efficient!
She doesn’t catch me watching her sometimes. She made me angry the other day, but I won’t start a fight with the person who controls my living situation. No. I’m slowly gaslighting her. Making her think she’s home alone, turning off a light or moving an object while she’s in the shower or popping into her room, so when she comes out she wonders “didn’t I just do that?”
I always come out on top. There’s some things I won’t even confess on here. But if I confessed - and was convicted for - the crimes I’ve committed, I’d be in prison for a couple decades.
I like to play a game, when I get too comfortable in my life. How many red flags can I drop, that people will talk about having seen in the inevitable documentary that will be made about my life after I commit some awful set of crimes that makes me famous?
I’ve already committed one such crime, tbh. People know I did it, too - but they think it’s just fun gossip. Don’t they know what a threat I was, on that day, to 160 people?
