Richard is very imposing and very pushing and believes he knows best for others, which we see in both his romantic relationships. He also has a habit of stripping away other's agency and ability to make their own choices, like with Cyprian.
But I don't feel like we touch on enough on how much he doesn't seem to acknowledge his own agency. He justifiably and honorably acknowledges the dangers of the power dynamic between him and Cyprian. That being that if Richard wanted him and Cyprian didn't, he would be coerced into consenting to basically being raped. We see this with his mother, who was raped repeatedly so that he and his brother could be born. Heck, even Dominic who consented, but was never sexually satisfied, who kept it secret for years.
These are totally justified fears and honestly the book is way too hard on him for this, in my opinion. Yes, Cyprian can say no and yes, he would be able to find another employer very easily, but that's because of the unique situation he's in. Remember his cousin who was assaulting a maid before Richard intervened? She likeky wouldn't have had such an easy time refusing or finding employment if she had. Richard had to step in there and put a stop to it for her.
And speaking of Richard stopping things, back to my actual point of this post. There's a lot of talk about how Cyprian could say no and how it should be his choice and all that but like... No one ever directly says, "Richard, you are not a rapist. You wouldn't do that."
No seriously, think of about it, let's just say Cyprian had felt like rejected him and couldn't say no. Ate we to believe that his body language wouldn't show it? Whether he stiffened and didn't reciprocate, or if his movements became less passionate or robotic or if he simply fought against him physically. Or even if he just said no. Cool, yay, he has agency amnd spoke up... And Richard is double his size, is wealthy and has connections and influence. He could just rape him, fire him and charge him for slander if he tried to reveal the Richardians. It isn't like Will, Shakespeare or anyone else are goong to back him up when it means they and their lovers swing, too. He'd be able to find employment with someone else if he didn't speak up and get labeled as a man who spread lies to ruin his ex-boss's reputation. He'd have to keep quiet and find someplace else to work and just deal with the trauma or pain that comes from what happened.
So again, I jusr find it weird that no one says, "Richard, you are not like your father, you would respect him if he wanted to stop" or "Richard, you are not a rapist, you can stop as well". He goes on and on about how it isn't fair to his partner, rightfully so, and while that does seem quite pushy and demeaning, it just... It seems selfish to place all the blame on if his consent (while ignoring that Cyprian has consented and made the first move) and none on himself for just... Not being a rapist.
He says that his father had a right to rape his mother, they needed heirs, and it feels so...weird. It sounds like he is parroting the beliefs of the time, but I wonder if he truly believes that at all deep down. Clearly he doesn't, he would have married Cyprian is allowed and yet it's clear he values consent from his partners and recognizes it's importance.
But Richard seems to have this deep rooted fear that he will somehow end up like his father despite being the farthest thing from him. It is just...something that has bothered me and I didn't know how to explain it succinctly, so here's a long rambling mess instead.
