vorfreude

(n) The joyful, intense anticipation that comes from imagining future pleasures. I am too full of life to be half loved.

[mossghoul]

Tbh I think the worst thing about tumblr-flavoured social justice is that it’s slipped out of tumblr and now informs university policies and practices and the dominant views of the 18-25 crowd.

It’s accessible because nobody ever thinks beyond repeating catchy quips as if they’re 10 year old debaters who haven’t moved beyond the tactic of hammering in a team line by quoting it verbatim every 40 seconds. It doesn’t require deeper analysis, it doesn’t require critical thought, and it prioritises the individual and being better and more pure than others in a way that’s very appealing.

Like I wouldn’t give a shit if the nonsense that passes for analysis and praxis was confined to this site, but it has tangible effects.

[emirael]

I lost my father to Pokemon Go and I regret so many life decisions. I’m the one who told him about the game. I’m the one who initially encouraged him. What have I done?

Now he starts every phone call with a Pokemon update. He gets all the names wrong and asks me what a Dragonite is called every time he brings up the “fat fighting orange dragon”

It’s gotten so bad he’s started watching the anime on Netflix. Help.

[emirael]

Okay adding to this. My dad isn’t great at remembering the names of things. So during our pokemon update phone calls, he says shit like this:

“I have a cool pineapple head now!”

“I was down to my last stripey ball trying to catch the blue dragon snake. I told him if he ran away I was gonna be so mad.”

“And the gym had one of those big fat orange dragons!” (he still can’t remember what a Dragonite is called)

BUT THEN. but then. he’s also like, OUTRAGEOUSLY into it now? He’s level 27 and talks about how “the gym wars are brutal, babe,” and how long it takes to take down a level 10 gym? (LEVEL T E N)

And a couple weeks ago he called me to talk about the merits of the old-style Gyrados (which he pronounces guy-rad-os sorry I can’t stop him) that has the dragon breath move, versus the new ones that don’t because Niantic made a change. And he has like 6 Gyrados because his work is by a Magikarp nest or something? HOW MANY fucking magikarp do you catch for 6 gyrados? He’s about to evolve two more. H E L P.

and he says shit like, “Learning about individualized values really radicalized my thinking.” and he means it. Before he evolves ANY pokemon he googles CP estimates and has a pokemon calculator??

This morning he called me because he finally has enough Dratini candy to evolve a fat fighting dragon and wanted to talk about which Dragonair he should evolve. (One with high CP but bad IVs, one with medium-high CP, but okay IVs, and one with the lowest CP of the 3, but A+ IVs) And at this point he’s so far beyond my skill with the game (he’s been higher-leveled than me for months now) that I don’t even know what to tell him. I literally can’t advise him.

My father is more of a pokemon master than I ever was. The other day he texted me the team rocket theme song.

[emirael]

Team Instinct. I told him I was Team Valor when I first told him about the game and he was like, “Okay I’ll join your team babe!”

And then idk he forgot?? And when his account crashed after a week he did a Pikachu restart (that should have tipped me off about the impending obession tbh) and he picked Instinct again.

I ain’t even mad bruh. He so clearly belongs in Instinct. He’s happy there. It’s his natural habitat. Before work he goes and meets up with some other Instinct people to take the Georgetown Cupcake gym in DC. It’s super cute.

My dad will be your Team Instinct dad if you need one

[emirael]

So my dad has always been in the habit of getting to work early. I don’t know wtf he used to do, but now when he gets in early, he goes to the Georgetown Cupcake gym in DC and apparently teams up with “some friends I’ve never met” to take down the gym for Team Instinct.

Then he goes to work and keeps the game open so he can grab Magikarp every couple minutes. Apparently his work is like ON a friggin nest.

He keeps his Pokemon Go habit a secret at work. Nobody knows. On his lunch break, he says, “hey I’m gonna go for a walk” and goes on a 12-pokestop loop. He makes sure to hit up the local Dratini and Pikachu nests (the presence of which is UNFAIR AF). He also take a few minutes to reinforce ‘his’ gym, by which point has been under attack a few times.

At work, he keeps his phone on data instead of wifi (he has unlimited data. For some godforsaken reason he went through 30GB/mo BEFORE Pokemon Go.) because that means his avatar jumps around a bit more?? He says he opens and closes the app a few times to reset it and get the GPS connection to reset and nab him a few pokemon.

Apparently he gets about 140 pokeballs a day. And goes through them all.

[emirael]

This got a new batch of notes, so here’s a Dad Update.

He has 114 Pikachu candy. I hate him. Apparently he’s watching the anime almost every night. He’s on season 2. I think he’s just gonna go through and watch it A L L which is a prospect so terrifying it needs no explanation.

Out of the 6 Gyrados he’s evolved, he’s kept the top 3. He sent me some screencaps the other day of his current top-contender Magikarp and the pokedex entry, where you can see he’s caught 585 of them.

Five hundred eighty five. Who tf has TIME for that??

Apparently he still hasn’t decided which Magikarp to evolve.

He should make level 28 in a day or so.

[airyairyquitecontrary-deactivat]

this dad will truly protect the world from devastation

[the-sapphic-raven]

But will he protect all people within our nation?

[therightfit]

Oh hey I haven't been on Tumblr for like 2 months?? Sup Anyway I cleaned out a bunch of clothes and other shit from my room today and I can't believe I can continue to accumulate so much STUFF. It's kind of disgusting. Ugh.

[sorayachemaly]

EVERY bar should do this

[alexanderofbrennenburg-deactiva]

smol cat

[thawrah]

i think the weirdest thing is having left over information about someone. like i still know someone’s favorite girl name. or their favorite season. or someone’s address. i remember someone’s favorite ice cream flavors. and someone’s favorite childhood book. and the mental disorder their uncle has. i remember the ages and birthdays of their siblings. i remember the song they said they’d sing to their spouse. where do i put this down? where do i learn to forget?

[hinihana]

some flowers, just for you.

[giblie-deactivated20160329]

[ferretfyre]

“Isn’t it strange, to create something that hates you?”

[therightfit]

I had a dream about my ex

I saw him at a bus stop or something on my way somewhere? And we kind of did that head nod acknowledge thing, I was very uncomfortable. Somehow we were talking a bit and he said he was getting out of town for good. All I said was, does your mom know? And as I was walking away I just yelled back, Tell your mom! And he said he did. And then for some reason after that we were back at the scene where we were talking. Then B shows up, because I guess we were meeting up or together already and he had gone somewhere, so then we were all pretty uncomfortable. I awkwardly introduced them to each other. And at this moment I was looking t my ex and realized how different he looked, he had lost a lot of weight and had hipstery glasses. I guess he was saying he was unhappy and needed to get out ASAP. So then somehow I'm in "his" apartment, where he lives with her, and apparently their infant? Ex is not there since he has left.And idk I was there with B's group of friends and we were just there but she wasn't home. Then we see her car pull up and we're like, oh shit, and are scrambling to get out. And when she gets to the door I wake up.

[therightfit]

So I scratched my car on a concrete post in the parking garage this morning and I'm really fucking shaken up and upset about it I hate driving, it's the worst

[therightfit]

When you treat the same patient who only finished radical treatment a year ago.

[doublesslightpeppa-deactivated2]

@ God y do u waste beautiful eyelashes on ungrateful men

[mostlycatsmostly]

[yellowxperil-deactivated2026012]

srsly tho this is absolutely a thing that dudes do all the f***ing time

like where if he knows a girl doesn’t necessarily want to give him a hug, he will trap her in this position in front of witnesses where she has 2 options- both of which are undesirable for her, while simultaneously desirable for him

if she doesn’t want to hug him, whatever she does, it will suck for her.

she can 1. say nah and be the fucking asshole in front of other ppl or 2. forsake her corporeal boundaries and allow unwanted intimate contact

it’s a f***ing trap

[bombchelle]

F***ing hate dudes forreal.

[poltxsexkitten]

too many f***ing times ugh

[potamideriver]

Story time. One day I was on the MAX (basically a giant street car that goes all over the metro area) on my way to meet up with a few friends. I didn’t look at anyone, I didn’t speak to anyone, I just stood to the side on my phone making sure I wasn’t going to be late to my meeting. Out of no where, this guy comes up to me and starts to chat me up. Me, being who I am, am absolutely terrified to tell this guy to f*** off. He was at least half a foot taller than me, and was way too bulky for me to fight back. So I suck it up at humor him, say hello. Before introducing himself or asking me for my name, he asks me out on a date. Not wanting to piss him off I try to make light of the situation and I laugh, telling him that my boyfriend wouldn’t like the idea, but thank you for the offer. He just shrugs and says, “He doesn’t need to know.” At this point I’m scared out of my mind. There’s this guy who, after seeing me run two blocks to catch the train, comes up to me and has made it perfectly clear that he wasn’t going to leave without getting something out of me. I deny him a second time, saying, “I don’t even know you’re name. We’re strangers, I don’t know you.” He finally introduces himself and asks me for my phone number. I tell him I don’t give my number out to people I’ve just met and he says, “Fine, but at least take mine so we can meet up later.” So he watches me plug his number into my phone (which I deleted as soon as I knew I was safe and away from him) as we’re pulling up to my stop. I tell him I need to leave and switch trains and he tells me, “Oh, I’ll wait with you. I don’t have any plans, so I’m in no rush.” It’s important to note what at this point he had previously told me that he was late to a job interview, but he has all the time in the world because he still hasn’t gotten what he wanted from me; a yes. I get off of the train and he follows me, and waits at the platform with me for over ten minutes until my train arrives, asking me all sorts of personal questions about where I live and where I was going that day. As soon as the train pulls up he grabs for me and says, “Do I at least get a hug before you go?” I was terrified. I was embarrassed. This dude, who before even asking me for my name asks me out on a date and then continues to harass me after I tell him I have a boyfriend, asks me for a hug only fifteen minutes after meeting. People around us were staring at me, as if I was being rude for denying him, and every inch of me was mortified. I wanted to run, but I felt like if I had done that he would have chased after me and things would have gotten worse. So I did, and he squeezed me so tight I felt like I was going to burst. It took me a good ten seconds to get him to let go and I ran to the train car just as the doors were closing. He was trying to get me to miss my train so I would have to wait with him even longer. I would have been stuck there for over a half an hour until the next train came by, and the platform (aside from the few buses coming by) was now COMPLETELY EMPTY. He knew EXACTLY what he was doing and he knew EXACTLY how to get me alone with him. People, if you are in a situation like this do not feel obligated to give in. If someone is making you uncomfortable and asks to touch you in any way, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SAY YES. Make excuses, be blunt, just straight up say ‘no’. If possible, go to someone else near by who you think can help you and ask them to help you. It’s important for guys to learn that they can’t get what they want just by asking over and over again. I got lucky. But not everyone does. Please, everyone, Be Safe.

[d-o-llf-a-ce]

SECOND STORY TIME

So I was on the transit bus alone one time. This was my first time riding, and so already I was PETRIFIED. I sit down, pull out my ipod, and begin to play some games. This guy sits down next to me, and begins trying to have a conversation. I don’t really respond, I don’t even look at him, just give half-hearted “mhm”s and “oh”s, as I don’t want to be rude if he was just striking up a friendly conversation. He then asks me on a date.

Now, as I stated before, I already was absolutely petrified. My heart stopped and I didn’t know how to answer. So I just didn’t. He didn’t let up and I could feel his eyes on me. I quietly stammer out a “no thanks” and my stop HAPPENS to be coming up, so I pull the string thing to let the driver know I want to stop there, and once we stop and the doors open I get up and he asks me, “Well, can I at least have a hug before you go if you won’t go on a date with me?” 

This makes me break. There are now people staring, as we are the only people standing up and not getting off… So I just start crying. Hell, I am bawling almost instantly. He looks so fucking freaked out and people are now getting up to come over and comfort me/question him. I don’t stop crying, and he keeps trying to comfort me by touching me, and people are yelling at him for that. 

AND THEN. AND. FUCKING. THEN. THE GOD DAMN BUS DRIVER. A VERY EASILY 6 FOOT BURLY MAN. COMES OVER TO US. PULLS THE GUY AWAY. AND KNEELS DOWN. HE THEN ASKS, IN THE MOST CALM VOICE, “Did you request the stop?” I very slowly and shakily nod, as I am still crying my eyes out. He then asks, “Do you want to get off?” I give a quiet “mhm” and nod once again, and he offers me his hand. I take it, he stands up, and he escorts me off the bus. He asks me questions such as where I was going next, if I was going to meet someone shortly, if I was going to transfer buses from there. He was very polite and waited for me to answer the entire time, and my friend (who I was going to be meeting there) showed up. He asked me if this was someone I knew, I said yes, and he said alright, have a good day. He then told me- and this is something stuck in my mind forever, so it is word for word-

“If some guy EVER starts harassing you like that again, do exactly what you did there. Cry. Cry and scream and have a temper tantrum. Not only will it throw him off, but it will get others to notice. They might not interfere, they might, but you will have gotten their attention and if you happen to go missing the next day the search for you will be a hell of a lot easier because everyone in that location will have seen you screaming and crying with a guy now very awkward with his actions. They will know. That is what my daughter did, and three days after she went missing she was back in my arms. I pray for you and every other person like you who has this done. You stay safe now, okay?” And after I began blubbering again, I nodded and he left.

So this is the second lesson for yall. If you can not have the courage to say no or make an excuse, cry. Let out those sobs and tears and cry your heart out. Because it is going to make people notice and make people aware.

[cosmic-noir]

Reblogging for that second story. This might save a life.

[grumpybeardruid-archive-deactiv]

I just wanna note that bus drivers can be really amazing and good ones do look out for their riders.

[han-syolo-shot-first]

Also, as an additional tip (in case you cannot cry on command or such), you can say, “No, because you’re creepy/creeping me out” and if he persists or tries to laugh it off, say “I do not want to be touched” and look at one of the strangers/persons that is watching.

It: 1. Gives them a sense of urgency in the situation, as the eye contact is a way to make them feel as though you are personally asking for their help and it is now their obligation to help. 2. Contains words so that if you’re in a public place but people aren’t necessarily watching, then they (as natural evesdroppers) can overhear the attention-grabbing words and then notice the situation. Note, this does NOT mean that they will come for help, but you might be able to look someone in the eye (as previously mentioned) or just get some people’s attention. 3. It shows that you have fight in you. As with rapists, those who are physically aggressive (ie. these huggers) choose women they see as an easy target. The moment you show them you are going/willing to fight them, they are less likely to continue. Sadly, this is not always the case, but every little bit helps.

Hopes this also helps, guys, and I’m so sad that this has to even be a post we need.

[oxfordcommaforever]

Dudes who follow me: 1) reblog this 2) don’t be the creepy guy who asks random women for hugs 3) be aware of your friends or random creepy dudes and call them out if they act gross towards girls/womem

[valiantlystrangecomputeruniverse]

Seriously fuck this. Last weekend I was walking home downtown, super late (around the 2AM mark) and this guy comes up to me and asks if he can walk with me. I say sure, I’m honestly too tired to bother arguing and it’s a well lit, fairly busy street. He offers me a cigarette. I say no thanks. He’s offers it again only a couple minutes later and at this point I’m so desperate for something to occupy my hands with I take it. We talk, he’s nice enough. But he also asks pretty personal questions my age, where I’m from etc., he offers a little himself and I answer stupidly because I’m a little tipsy and I didn’t want to be impolite. We get to the point where he has to go. So I’m like “Okay, bye!” relieved I didn’t have to fabricate an excuse to leave and he goes in for a hug. Again, I wouldn’t want to be rude would I? And man is it a lingering hug, I’m the one that pulls away (he wasn’t going to) and still kind of holding me he says “Don’t you want to kiss me?”

I smile, like unable to believe this guy. We’d met maximum 15 minutes ago and I’m supposed to kiss you? Sadly I still I consider kissing him just to avoid a confrontation. But the bottom line is I don’t want to. So, I say, “I just met you. So, no. Sorry.” SORRY. I hate that I apologized. He then asked for my number. And I faltered, so he was all ‘if you’re not going to answer don’t take it.’ And I really do appreciate him saying that, it mostly made me realize he had no ill will, which made me feel a little safer saying, “Well, yeah. It was nice meeting you but honestly I just want to go home.”

He left without further fuss, but now I’m on edge, feeling guilty because he was ‘just being nice’ and I hate that. I hate that feeling of owing them something because they treat you like a regular human.

Seriously guys, approaching girls traveling alone will usually just leave them completely creeped out, and wishing they were safely at home. No matter how nice you think you’re being, I promise she’s coming up with safe escape routes while you talk about whatever it is you’re talking about. And that’s sad, but unfortunately it’s also the society we’re in. Guys feel entitled to affection after performing the minimal amount of politeness.

Even while I’m writing this I’m like, “Was it so bad?” and it was. It made me uncomfortable and scared and all I was just trying to go home. I didn’t ask him to walk me, I didn’t ask for a smoke. He pushed all these things on me while I was minding my own business and then I’m supposed to kiss him? Nope, sorry. Not how it works.

[brilliantlyhorrid]

Reblogging this for basically ALL of it and add my own. A couple summers ago a friend and I were walking home fairly late from a friend’s. We lived in a beach town during the summer so it wasn’t unusual. We were both a bit tipsy and she was telling me some story so she didn’t notice, but this guy walked by us on the phone, then I hear him say, “Hold on I just passed two beautiful girls” once he is behind us and I hear him hang up and am like “fuck, here we go.” 

He came up and starts walking next to us and my friend who is much more no-nonsense than me keeps shutting him down. Obviously he picks up on the fact that I’m much quieter and goes over to my side and puts his arm around my shoulder. I freeze up, because along with not liking physical contact from strangers, I literally don’t know what to do. Technically he hasn’t said anything threatening, so would I be dramatic or crazy if I told him to not touch me? While the “must be polite” part of me was duking it out with the self-preservation part, my friend just goes, “NOPE” and physically removes his arm from my shoulder. 

Then he asked us what was wrong, he just wanted to get to know us. My friend stops walking and says we don’t want to get to know him, leave us alone. He asks what’s wrong again, then moves to stand behind me and loosely wraps his arms around my neck/shoulders. Not restraining me in any way, but way too personal, like we’re posing for a fucking photo or something.  Way too close, and definitely uncomfortable/alarming. 

Apparently something switched on in my brain because my spine literally straightened up immediately and just on the border of projecting/yelling, I was like “If you don’t let me go RIGHT NOW I’m going to call the police.” 

EVEN THEN part of me was like technically he hasn’t committed a crime which is SO FUCKED UP. But I just kept repeating myself (because dude kept insisting he was just being “friendly”) until I took out my phone and he backed off. 

So be loud, even if part of you is questioning it. I would much rather overreact and risk embarrassing myself than not do anything and risk god knows what. 

[becketted]

Not wanting to piss him off I try to make light of the situation and I laugh, telling him that my boyfriend wouldn’t like the idea, but thank you for the offer. He just shrugs and says, “He doesn’t need to know.”

This has happened way too many times to me.

I have made up boyfriends and men have continued harassing me.

I have told them I was gay and men have continued harassing me.

I have made up husbands and men have continued harassing me. HUSBANDS. That did not deter them.

I have been forced to change routes more times than I can count.

I stopped feeling comfortable in a bookshop I used to like because one time a man harassed me while I was trying to read a book in silence.

I got harassed on half empty buses coming back from evening classes so often that I started just getting used to it as somehow the “price” to pay for going to class.

I have been forced to spend EXTRA MONEY to catch the subway because at times it looked safer than the bus (I have had a couple of very scary experiences where I was the only other person in the bus and a man harassed me and the driver didn’t do a thing - there were also good drivers, as that second story tells).

Seriously, this is no way of living.

I hate dudes.

[stilljewelss]

I suspect I am a tad older than a lot of the above posters, so a lot of the street harassment I experienced in my younger years (doesn’t really happen to me now) happened in a time before anyone even called it “harassment.” Girls and women were just supposed to either brush it off or accept it as a “compliment.”

And if you objected to that kind of thing in any way, you were perceived as being really really rude and borderline “crazy.”

That being said, I found that most guys who hit on me in that creepy way could/would be deterred if I made a bit of a scene. The reasoning being that if I “over-reacted” by yelling something like “I said NO! Now LEAVE ME ALONE!” then a) That would draw attention and the people around would know something was up - and most likely figure out or assume the guy was being a creep and b) It would seriously put the guy off in terms of how appealing he found me after that. Even creeps hate crazy bitches.

Now, I only ever used that approach if I was in public with a fair number of people around. The key is to deliberately create a scene, so as a few folks above mentioned, if anything bad does end up happening, lots of witnesses etc. But chances are, the guy will back off because it’s too much sudden attention on him.

As for guys asking for hugs - I used to just tell them I was getting sick. Like the stomach flu. Mention how you just shit yourself stupid in the bathroom a half hour before.* Describe the smell, even. Get graphic. He won’t want a fucking hug after that, trust me.

*Note: Talking about gross bodily functions works to get rid of unwanted creepers in general. I once started telling a guy who wouldn’t leave me alone at a bus stop about my period problems. Blood clots etc. He walked away.

[mr-quiyst]

This saddens me on a visceral level. The fucking length of this post is stomach-turning. This theme shouldn’t be so common.

[elli-jaine-deactivated20160323]

It pains me that there’s not a day that passes during commuting to and from work and campus that there is not some incident of a man giving me or one of my female friends unwanted attention. This has been a daily occurrence since I was 13. And it’s tiring. Really it is.

[allefory-deactivated20180304]

Reblogging because some of the tips on these post might help someone.

[alittlebitoflace]

Erica Choi

[passivites]

Erin Hanson