Welcome to the Bunghole..

Welcome to the Bunghole. -If you can't drink it all don't come at all!! {Please Read the disclaimer before starting... Then go to the Navigation to follow properly.}

[thespewcrew]

Welcome to the game of Quidditch.

The game is played by two teams of seven people (three Chasers, two Beaters, one Keeper, and one Seeker) and involves four balls (a Quaffle, two Bludgers, and a Golden Snitch).

The Keeper guards the goal posts, while the three Chasers score goals with the Quaffle by tossing it into one of the opposing team's three goal posts. The two Beaters keep the Bludgers away from their team and hit the Bludgers towards the opposing team, and the Seeker catches the Golden Snitch to end the game. The team whose Seeker catches the Snitch is awarded 150 points, but this does not necessarily mean they will win if the other team still has more points after the Snitch is caught.

The object of the game is to score more points than your opponents. Each goal is worth ten points and catching the Snitch is worth one-hundred fifty points. The game ends when the Snitch is caught or an agreement is reached between the captains of both teams. Some games can go on for many days if the Snitch is not caught (the record, according to Quidditch Through the Ages, is three months).

[thespewcrew]

The Rules of Quidditch.

The worldwide popularity and playing of the game of Quidditch is closely monitored and analysed by International Confederation of Wizards' Quidditch Committee

In 1750, the Department of Magical Games and Sports set down official rules for the game of Quidditch.

Players must not stray over the boundary lines of the pitch, although they may fly as high as desired. The Quaffle must be surrendered to the opposition if any player leaves the boundary (it is unknown what the penalty is if a player on defence leaves the pitch).

"Time out" may be called at any time by the Captain of a team. Time out may be extended to two hours if a game has already lasted for more than twelve hours. Failure to return to the pitch after this time will lead to the team being disqualified.

Penalties can be awarded to teams by the referee. A single Chaser may take the penalty by flying from the central circle towards the scoring area. The opposing team's Keeper may attempt to stop the shot being scored, but all other players must not interfere (it is unknown if the Seeker may still attempt to catch the Snitch while a penalty is being attempted).

Contact is allowed, but a player may not seize hold of another player's broomstick or any part of their anatomy.

No substitution of players is allowed throughout the game, even if a player is too injured or tired to continue to play. (Note: According to Goblet of Fire, during the Quidditch World Cup, at some point it lasted for days, and the players had to be switched out so that they could get some sleep).

Players may take their wands onto the pitch, but they must not be used on or against any players, any players' broomsticks, the referee, any of the four balls, or the spectators.

A game of Quidditch will only end once the Golden Snitch has been caught, or at the mutual consent of both team Captains.

Only the Keeper can block quaffle shots thrown by the opposing team.

[thespewcrew]

Fenway Park: Take One

Squeaky and I left the Bunghole in the care of Dobby and Trix-y for my first time at Fenway park. It was Squeaky's present to me after I got let out Azkaban without trying to escape. It was also a present to herself for graduating Lumberjacking with Grandpa Studmuffin.

We drove by where the Old Man on the Mountain used to be, until one day the S.p.e.w Crew hiked up there and I got in a heated debate with Old Man River about whether Curling is a real sport or not. Which I think it is, I got a little mad and threw a pebble at him.. Well it missed him and mountain man on the tip of him nose. and.. well.. his face slide right off the mountain never to be seen again.. NH banned the S.p.e.w Crew for life & then death... and beyond. I guess the people of the North liked him or something. Old Man River was so upset after that incident he summoned a rain storm that wouldn't let up. By the time we got to the park which took a while because my navigational skills were less then up to par. We got lost a lot... 

Needless to say the game was canceled.. Fluff!! It was just so happened the Joker was there having a grand ol' time laughing at all the losers who spent all sorts of money to watch the grounds crew sit in a water logged dugout. Though greatly disappointed Squeaky and myself Jumped the wall & slid across the infield tarp, using it as a giant slip and slide.         

[thespewcrew]

Thats What Bilbo Baggins Hates

Blunt the knives, bend the forks Smash the bottles and burn the corks Chip the glasses and crack the plates That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!

Cut the cloth, tread on the fat Leave the bones on the bedroom mat Pour the milk on the pantry floor Splash the wine on every door! Dump the crocks in a boiling bowl Pound them up with a thumping pole When you're finished if they are whole Send them down the hall to roll That's what Bilbo Baggins hates!

[thespewcrew]

Meeting Squeaky

Squeaky comes from a long line if Elves belonging to the Kennedy family. She was the Wedding gift to Maria Shriver and Arnold Schwarzenegger. Squeaky enjoyed her life in California. She had many Elf friends, one of which was a green haired elf named Skittles. They even had a brief romance. It would have been longer but Squeaky let slip the news of Arnold's "other son" and naturally the Govenator gave Squeaky Clothes. Skittles wanted nothing to do with her after that scandal. Heartbroken Squeaky apparated to the Caribbean to drink her life away, and to her surprise she met Winky. They hit it off immediately & after a few drunkin nights involving cat tipping & eventually Community Service : They hatched a plan to resurrect Dobby. All they had to do was dig him up & get him to London.          

[thespewcrew]

Songs of the Bunghole

Weasley Is Our King.

The Green Dragon.

Hey Ho To The Bottle I Go.

A Pirates Life For Me.

Thats What Bilbo Baggins Hates.

[thespewcrew]

Weasley Is Our King

First Version. When he did bad... Weasley cannot save a thing,

He cannot block a single ring,

That's why Slytherins all sing:

Weasley is our King.

Weasley was born in a bin

He always lets the Quaffle in

Weasley will make sure we win

Weasley is our King. 

Weasley is our King,

Weasley is our King,

He always lets the Quaffle in

Weasley is our King.

  Second Version. When he did GREAT!! Weasley is our King,

Weasley is our King,

He didn't let the Quaffle in

Weasley is our King.

Weasley can save anything,

He never leaves a single ring,

That's why Gryffindors all sing:

Weasley is our King.

[thespewcrew]

Hey Ho To The Bottle I go.

Hey, ho, to the bottle I go, To heal my heart and drown my woe! Rain may fall and wind may blow, But there still be many miles to go! Sweet is the sound of the pouring rain, And stream that falls from hill to plain! Better than rain or rippling brook, Is a mug of beer inside this Took! Strange and dark is the world outside, But in the pub we've naught to hide! With lots of ale, and barley wine, This evenin' is surpassin' fine! Harvest's in and cold without, An' hobbits strong are hobbits stout! Naught to fear, and naught to think, For hobbits now have ale to drink! The Shire lays right down to sleep, In slumber long and slumber deep! Hushed be hobbit lass and lad, With faces plump and faces glad! A land of peace and a hobbit hole And in a pouch a pipeweed roll! Never falter, never fear, For the Shire will always be here!

[thespewcrew]

A Pirates Life For Me

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We pillage plunder, we rifle and loot. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We extort and pilfer, we filch and sack. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Maraud and embezzle and even highjack. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me. We kindle and char and in flame and ignite. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We burn up the city, we're really a fright. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We're rascals and scoundrels, we're villians and knaves. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We're devils and black sheep, we're really bad eggs. Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. We're beggars and blighters and ne'er do-well cads, Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Aye, but we're loved by our mommies and dads, Drink up me 'earties, yo ho. Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.

[thespewcrew]

The Green Dragon

Oh you can search far and wide, You can drink the whole town dry, But you'll never find a beer so brown,

Oh you'll never find a beer so brown,

As the one we drink in our hometown, As the one we drink in our hometown. You can drink your fancy ales, You can drink them by the flagon, But the only brew for the brave and true... ..Comes from the Green Dragon!!

[thespewcrew]

In the beginning there was Meade...

House Elves of Harry Potter- You know them as the servants of 'Old' Wizarding Families. They only become free when presented with clothes.... These are their stories after the events of book 7, But first lets have a little recap... shall we

Our story begins with Winky 'the Drunk'.

So after being sacked by my Master Barty "The Grouch" Crouch, My pal Dobby got me a job at Hogwarts. I cooked..... & drank heavily for a few years. After a {Certain incident with a cat.} *Which was NOT my fault...* - Mrs. Norris you LIAR!!! I spent a little time at Azkaban Prison cleaning toilets. I developed Tourettes Syndrome (FucKiNg SquIRrel..) due to the fact that Papa Smurf was there & told me the highlight of his stay was when Bubba came to visit him after lights out. (You know what Bubba makes you do, right? Toss the salad..) No perv! Literally toss the salad - for the next meal.

So anyways the boy who lived - well... lived some more. I was finally able to leave Azkaban, S.P.E.W became 'HUGE' thanks to Hermy, Henry, Hemroid, HERMIONE!! So me & some House Elves met while {Traveling the Caribbean} decided to find Dobby, dig him up, Take him to Merry Old London, and have him resurrected. Apparently this woman Evelyn O'Connell is the best at this sort of thing. He came back fine.... He just has a wonkey eye; Like he can focus on you for a few seconds but it'll start drifting to the side.

So once we got that situated we all ended up moving to a little town called Salem. When I say S.P.E.W had become 'huge' I mean it was so big that we the free Elves of the world were able to start a {Professional Quidditch League.} I also opened a bar called the {Bunghole}.

My name is Winky the Drunk and these are our stories......

[thespewcrew]

Disclaimer!!!

We be but fan girls who own nothing!! The concept is ours but the Characters + all else we use from songs, movies, books, what have you is NOT ours.. This is for fun so please don't sue us... You'll only get debt. Now sit back & enjoy... This is not an RP.