Ramblings of an Upstart

I like to waste time and talk nonsense.

[noamchimpsky]

anyone else having a…hmm. what’s the word? Really Shit Time? 

[thatsbelievable]

Q: Do Bats Owe Me Money?

A: Only if you have entered into a business arrangement with them.

[futurefrenzy]

I can’t believe the straighties are comparing us to seatbelts… like what is this? Grade 2 sex ed? Grow up.

[aspacelobster-deactivated201812]

[stolentweets]

[japancocaine-deactivated2020042]

[goldnpoc]

the last part had me laughing lol facts tho she preaching 

[beyonceknowlesme]

Jesus Christ, these kids today are getting smarter and smarter

[imagine-loki]

Imagine that one of the main reasons why Loki pulls pranks and cause mischief is just to impress you and make you laugh because he loves nothing more but to see your beautiful smile.

[jazzytee]

[madam-slay]

[jazzytee]

[sheglows]

*me taking yet another buzzfeed quiz at 2am* please tell me who i am

[turings-deactivated20180627]

in an attempt to appeal to the pathos of my potential employers, i wrote my resume using the same format a no-kill shelter would use to describe a geriatric dog

[turings-deactivated20180627]

i am a gentle, mild-mannered young man looking for a forever job to spend the rest of my years in. though i may not be the most talented and versatile person on the job market, i’m the perfect employee for someone out there, and that someone just might be you(r company)!

[anotherwellkeptsecret]

pet owner: *hears noise*

pet owner: 

[pics-that-make-you-go-hmm]

[officialcrow]

this website is proof “be yourself” isnt advice applicable to everyone some of yall really just need to keep that weird shit inside til you die

[thenatsdorf]

The best Sisyphean task.

[insanely-smart]

@beaglebitch

[lowbrowcomicinterludes]

This is Heaven.

[dailyb99gifs]

Favorite Brooklyn Nine-Nine Characters (as voted by our followers): ↳ 3. Raymond Holt 

[tvneon]

[seokjinings]

*finishes coffee* I really want more coffee

[aqualung209]

Bear1-1000.jpg

[ihitthat-sexually]

[rcktpwr]

why are you literally waging war on introverts..

they keep talking about harry potter and i cant stand it anymore