Things Children Tell Me

My name is Miss B. I work with children under the age of 10 and these are the things they tell me. All names have been changed.

[thingschildrentellme]

Emma (age 5): I'm allergic to apples so I can't have applesauce.

*3 hours later*

Emma: I was thinking of cats, not apples. There's probably no cats in my applesauce.

[theonion]

Oh God, Teacher Arranged Desks In Giant Circle 

[thingschildrentellme]

Emmy (age 5): My sister is 6 today!

Me: So she's an old lady now?

Emmy: No... you aren't an old lady until you're 15 or 14.

[bennybennybennybennybennybenny]

[thingschildrentellme]

Kia (age 8): What are your weekend plans?

Me: Watching Netflix and playing with my kitten.

Kia: You forgot one thing, Miss B.

Me: What?

Kia: If you watch tv, you have to exercise.

[thingschildrentellme]

Me: Ignore him, he's not setting a good example.

Callie (age 5): I can't, I see really good.

[thingschildrentellme]

Me: Let's get into line, please!

Gerard (age 5): Is there any room for the fabulous Gerard?

[thingschildrentellme]

It’s been such a long time and I’m so sorry! I forgot to maintain this as I entered my second year of teaching so as I enter my third, I want to do a better job.

I am now at a school I love. I had an amazing first grade class last year that I miss more than anything, and if I could have looped with them, I would have. I am with kindergarten this year and today was our very exciting, overwhelming first day. I have a lot to learn but I am ready to go!

I hope your students are wonderful and that you have wonderful years ahead of you! Remember to take time for yourselves and don’t stay until the custodians kick you out!

~ Miss B

[thingschildrentellme]

Breaking down racism in second grade

[thingschildrentellme]

While learning about slavery

Jake (age 9): Man, I hate white people!

Jenny (age 7): Me too!

[thingschildrentellme]

One of my students is learning English at the moment and this is the answer he gave on a science test. Too cute.

[thingschildrentellme]

We lived in Honduras when my mom was more... flaca.

Christian (age 7) discusses Honduras

[thingschildrentellme]

My brain has goosebumps!

Lola (age 7) discusses... I don't even know what

[thingschildrentellme]

Jolie (age 7): I'm the only girl here!

Me: I'm here too, silly.

Jack (age 7): You're a woman. You already went through puberty.

[thingschildrentellme]

I can see your bra.

Lola (age 7) discusses fashion

[thingschildrentellme]

Well at least I'm not white!

Darcy has strong feelings about being black.

[thingschildrentellme]

Did you know the sun started as a medium-sized potato?

Darcy (age 7) drops some knowledge