Things I Didn't Click @thingsididntclick - Tumblr Blog

ESPN: "Justin Gatlin can't outrun Usain Bolt or his doping past"

#ESPN #So a few days ago a longtime e-friend invited me to a group that makes fun of Facebook trending headlines #Which made me think of this silly thing I abandoned. Some good memories.#And then like a sign #I saw THIS garbage attempt at poignancy as a Google News top story.#This isn't a comeback. Maybe.

CNN: "'These chorizos are huge!' – how Paul Ryan's sausage…"

#CNN #Tell me ALL about Paul Ryan's sausage.

InformationWeek: "Nokia Kicks Apple's Map In The Apps"

#InformationWeek #oh geez not in the apps #anywhere but there ;___;

NBCNews.com (blog): "'Do I look fat?' Curiosity rover checks its belly on Mars"

#NBCNews.com (blog)#No you don't.#You're not even a person.#Why would you.

The Christian Science Monitor: "Are you a real foodie? Take our quiz!"

#The Christian Science Monitor #I'm sorry but the quiz indicates you are a fake foodie with delusions of taste buds.#Better luck next time!

The New York Times: "At Cat Video Film Festival, Stars Purr for Close-Ups"

#The New York Times #There is actually an interesting discussion about recontextualization and how one enjoys art in this story.#You will never figure that out from this headline.

USA Today: "A nation founded by Puritans, which once banned DH Lawrence's Lady Chatterley's Lover as too spicy, has developed an insatiable appetite for the joys of erotic romance."

#USA Today #Twilight fanfiction has truly ascended to historical importance.

The Washington Post (blog): "Rick Santorum loves talking about hands"

#The Washington Post (blog)#Someone actually spent time compiling quotes for this article.#Think about that.

Forbes: "Want An RFID Chip Implanted Into Your Hand? Here's What The DIY Surgery ..."

#Forbes #phrase that should never appear in any context: ''DIY surgery''

The Wall Street Journal: "Forget the Web, Start-Ups Get Real"

#The Wall Street Journal #http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUH3JQjcweM

MyBroadband: "What do Steve Jobs and a clown have in common?"

#MyBroadband #A: I don't want to shoot either in the face for posing this question.

Zee News: "Shia LaBeouf, girlfriend argue on the street"

#Zee News #BREAKING NEWS: ''Relationships are complicated'' says science

BBC News: "Ecuador's decision to grant Julian Assange asylum occupies the papers with the Times portraying the Wikileaks' founder as a superhero - naked except for a flag of Ecuador."

#BBC News #cover art concepts that make me scream in agony

Time: "Switzerland Has Its Own Kind of Obamacare -- and Loves It"

#Time #I hear in Switzerland they call it ''health care.''

U.S. News & World Report: "I Wish U.S.A. Basketball Had Lost in the Olympics"

#U.S. News & World Report #I wish /!\ CONTROVERSIAL OPINION LINKBAIT /!\ wasn't a thing that existed.

ESPN: "Gabby Douglas' hair draws criticism"

#ESPN #criticisms that cannot possibly belong in civilized human discourse

News.com.au: "Great body, fine head: Women find joy in beer"

#News.com.au #Are you talking about the ladies or the beer there?#Oh right the answer is misogyny.

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