not a typical human

I feel sometimes as though I am an artist that fears creation. Instead I am sponge-like, cognitively creating, but biding my time until I feel I have something meaningful to create. a thinker. a reader. a lover.

[thinkingsrsly]

Reading some socialist news, most of which I’m on board with, and noticed by he classic throwaway comment that identity politics and proponents of it are to blame for the left’s failures. That the right wouldn’t have the momentum they do if it weren’t for the silly women in gays.

I know the argument is more nuanced than that, and that capitalism and consumerism has created a funhouse mirror version of identity politics that reinforces the worst structures and perpetuates individualism instead of community (plus the in fighting). But a recent citations needed episode really called out left media’s reliance on this myth, which plays right into the right’s hands. I should really finish listening to it as maybe it will help me articulate what I’ve had a icky feeling about in the past. It just seems like the critique is not critique but instead a dismissal of very real violence experience by not white men. And to say that those who advocate for identity stuff are causing our loss in this cultural war is pure none sense, and intentionally or not, seems to have the purpose of upholding the myth that the white cis man is rational and everyone else is frivolous.

just some thoughts.

#identitypolitics #leftism

[anxietyproblem]

[wolfinthethorns]

Honestly, in my work as a therapist, I’m seeing this A Lot, and tbh I still don’t have a satisfactory approach to it. A heavy dose of Existentialist “create your own Purpose” tempered with “when the plane’s going down, put your own oxygen mask on first”, but… yeah, there is no ethical way to work on individual emotional distress without acknowledging the systemic socioeconomic, geopolitical fuckery going on at the moment, and the sheer grief that comes with it.

[castielific]

I’m a guidance counselor/psychologist for teenagers and it’s getting really hard to motivate young people to work for a future they don’t believe in. 

 They look at ther future and see global warming, wwIII, unemployement, political unstability, poison in everything  they eat, the earth and animals dying all around them. 

I saw this video where someone was asking french teens in the 50s how they imagine the future would be. The war hadn’t been over for long and yet it was all positive with like peace and flying cars and such. Then they went and ask the same questions to nowadays teens and hell that was depressing. Some still had hope, but it was just that “well I hope I’ll have a nice house and maybe some kid” but there was such a hesitancy to it, like they didn’t dare to hope too much. 

People mock Greta Thunberg but what they don’t get is that when she said “you stole my dreams”, it was the truth. 

Young people don’t get to dream like they used to. They don’t dream anymore, they grief all that won’t be anymore and that’s just so fucking sad. 

[thinkingsrsly]

I have no problem being confrontational when it comes to abstractions (with women..heh): ideas, defending a group of people, a logical err in thinking. When something strikes a personal cord though? I am paralyzed.

[just-shower-thoughts]

The person who first discovered that coconut could be eaten must have experienced depths of hunger many will never know.

[heckshowerthoughts]

They prolly just saw some other animal doin it my man

[transhumanist-viking-deactivate]

you mean like the coconut crab, which naturally feeds on coconuts by breaking htem open with large claws? 

[the-spoopy-ghost-of-raejin99]

Coconut crab: I sneep. I break ze coconut. I eat ze coconut.

Some dude:

[dontbeanassbutt]

K but have y’all seen what coconut crabs look like cause

Jesus Christ

[kentucky-fried-bucky]

[thinkingsrsly]

I learned about it from this post about crabs...

[sad-plath]

“1. You must let the pain visit. 2. You must allow it to teach you 3. You must not allow it to overstay.”

— Ijeoma Umebinyuo, three routes to healing

[theyatemytailorr]

never in my life did I think that toilet doors would make me so angry

[chongotheartist]

[ballerinaghost-deactivated20190]

I reblog every time for the cartoon lmao

[ribas-hammer]

The 2 genders: physical activity and capitalism.

[thinkingsrsly]

Dread

Between my belly and my throat, rotten vinegar; if there is such a thing. Stomach problems happen when the shoe is close to dropping. Visceral and embodied feeling is just the way it is, but alas, it doesn’t make it any easier.

[thinkingsrsly]

Differentiation

The podcast Scene on Radio helped me articulate something I’ve never really been able to. The conflation of “statistical fact” with and “absolute fact”. The example they used was the statistical fact that men are on average more aggressive than women, which does not make it an absolute fact (i.e., true in all or even more scenarios). The top of the bell curve for women is going to be more aggressive than the bottom and maybe mid part of the bell curve for men. Such an important distinction.

[thegirlwiththecoffintattoo]

Grief is the last act of love we have to give to those we loved.

[bookofmirth]

Me tbh

[thinkingsrsly]

I wonder if my bestie has thought of doing this...

[luxe-pauvre]

[kinghardy]

[thinkingsrsly]

*Dies*

[lulufrost]

[motivation-and-fitness]

[thinkingsrsly]

Yep

[pr1nceshawn]

[thinkingsrsly]

Especially this last <3

[thinkingsrsly]

my circle

Ohh, the circle of sadness, self hatred,shame and that oh-so crippling haze. Every year (I believe you coincide with the seasons but perhaps that is a false correlation I have made) you come back. I try SO HARD to fend you off. I promise it will be different: I prep, I plan and get ready to fight. But alas, here you are. I am beating myself up for my superbly terrible day of work (I am basically an ornament in my office at this point) and feel utterly alone and helpless. I google “sad at work today” and my work’s resources for depression and all the options presented seem to require too much of the steam that’s keeping me breathing. I don’t even know if you can call this depression, especially with my bursts of creativity. So then I think: bipolar? But again that also doesn’t fit; the fast cycles, the minimal mania (perhaps not mania at all... I mean why we gotta call creativity mania as though it’s negative. I just mean it isn’t like my friend K). And those moments of the wheels-a-turning, driving me forward to creation, it sometimes bites me. Because when I am like this, the idea of following through is the heaviest of weights... the corners of my duvet attached to anchors in the ocean. I try to say no, I have gotten so much better at saying no, but I can never be prepared for when I am back here. How long am I back here? WHY am I back here? The part of me that is hard on myself says it is because I have no follow-through. I don’t follow through on my conclusions or in pursuing what I have concluded I need.

I am even upset right now that what am I writing lacks cohesion, order, organization. I have to let it go.

Just let it go.

I wish I didn’t feel alone. Especially since I know rationally that I am not alone (I am so lucky, really). How does one reach out when everyone seems to far and  arms are being used to keep from falling.

[thinkingsrsly]

The borders, Dear Mr. Philosopher, can't be quite as neat as you hope them to be.

Siri Hustdvedt, Delusions of Certainty