Today's Document
Kiana Khansmith
ojovivo
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Jules of Nature
Kaledo Art
oozey mess
Monterey Bay Aquarium
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d e v o n
KIROKAZE
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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Sade Olutola
dirt enthusiast
Misplaced Lens Cap
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YOU ARE THE REASON
Janaina Medeiros
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@thisbehailey
I bet there's at least one guy who uses a wheelchair who became a sneakerhead just for the laughs. Wearing pristine bright white brand shoes like "if you let your shoes touch the ground you're a bitch. If you keep them on display and never wear them, you're a coward. I'm the only one doing this correctly. Fuck you, get on my level."
I know that I'll certainly never be someone they'd build a memorial for, but if I could get one, I'd like to get one of those park bench statues that are sitting on the bench. Specifically of me sitting casually looking towards the other seat at an angle, looking intrigued with a "surprised but not disappointed" kind of a look on my face. Kind of a "huh, won't you look at that."
I want that specifically so people can make it a meme to post pictures of themselves showing me stuff. Like memes off their phone.
Or maybe things that they are proud of but don't have anyone else to show them to. Like your school graduation papers, this cool knitting project you finally finished, your baby who's never going to see their grandparents.
And I also want a clause that they will absolutely fucking never put those anti-homeless things of any kind on my damn bench. So if there's ever someone who's got nobody else to keep them company, they can at least spend the night with me.
This is so sweet! When I started reading it I thought you were gonna use the bench statue to look at people's crotches.
Some people are 100% gonna flash their tits or bits at it but everything's allowed for as long as nobody gets hurt and the cops won't catch you.
A PORN BOT UNFOLLOWED ME?
not that i care
thanks everyone :) more
I fucking hate the french language. They'll call something shit like "the fatal allure of the dark shimmering mistress" and it's slang for when you stick your dick in a wine bottle and get stuck.
by Yuming Li
Youtube is full of ads, spotify is full of ads, tumblr is full of ads, pinterest is full of ads. Everything uses ai. Every new update makes the website/app worse. Youtube auto translates almost every video I want to watch. Sometimes pinterest only loads ads for me. Check out this new ai feature. Here's a new update that breaks ur laptop. Here's a new update that breaks ur phone. Why are u complaining about ur phone, just get the newest iphone lol. Join my patreon. Join my membership. Pay a monthly membership to get all features. Upgrade your membership to get even more features. Subscribe to netflix. Subscribe to disney. Subscribe to amazon. Subscribe to hulu. This content isn't available in ur country. This content was removed. This website was removed. This feature only exists for apple. This app only exists for apple. U need to a WiFi connection to play this game. U need an account. We need your email to finish creating this account. We need your number to finish creating your account. We need your id to finish creating your account. In order to delete your account please write an email. In order to delete your account you need a laptop. Oops our database was hacked and ur information was stolen. Ur data was sold from this random website u used once 10 years ago. Spam call. Spam call. Spam call.
this year for halloween im going to be difficult
If you put a dish in a dishwasher, it gets washed. If you put a shirt in a dishwasher, it gets shredded and breaks the machine.
If you put a shirt in a washing machine, it gets washed. If you put a dish in a washing machine, it gets shattered and breaks the machine.
Maybe you are not weak. They just put you into the wrong washer.
Fun fact: you can avoid midlife crisis by literally simply just skipping it. Straight-up just skip being middle-aged. Once I turned 30 and aged out of the "young adult" bracket, I skipped straight into being a weird little old man. Record youngest bizarre old geezer in generations. Now if I'm lucky and play my cards right, I've got like 80 or 90 years of being a weird lttle old man left in me. If I manage to do a hundred, I'm going to start telling people that the secret to living to 130 is that I ate an entire pine cone every single day.
That, or that I can't die because heaven isn't taking me and the devil owes me money so he's avoiding me.
"Your love language is what you were deprived of as a child" actually no you're allowed to want, prefer and like things without everything tracing back to some dormant unprocessed trauma. You can just say you want to bounce on it without having to explain how as a child you always wanted - but never got - a trampoline.
"New Yorkers bite more people than sharks annually" is an excellent example of how statistics can be misleading. Like yeah no shit, do you have any idea how rare it is to even encounter a shark in the wild? They're not exactly urban animals. I'm pretty damn sure that if sharks were living in big cities like pigeons, just strolling down the streets looking for food scraps, you'd see a lot more news stories about New Yorkers biting them.
I know I couldn't handle having kids but if I was left in charge of some, I'd take them to the park to feed ducks. Not bread though, you shouldn't feed that to ducks. We're feeding them lettuce. Let the ducks going apeshit over lettuce show the kids that lettuce is actually awesome. When they go home, their parents are baffled by the fact that the kids are now willingly eating salad. In the most horribly animalistic fucked up way possible.
Someone looked at a a swarm of bees around a hive and thought “Those bastards are hiding something delicious in there”
Yea they sure did, after watching badgers and bears go after it you moron
