just gonna leave this here for anybody who wants it
free copies of:
the bonnie and clyde proshot
hadestown
the great gatsby(jeremy jordan)
dear evan hansen
jekyll and hyde
ride the cyclone
Next to normal proshot
website for free pdfs of books
a bunch of free movies and tv shows
enjoy!
update from like a year later: guys i stole all these from a girl who turned out to be a really horrible person so the more you use them the better i feel actually
theoretically, i understand the appeal of having percy, annabeth, and grover go to college. annabeth wants to be an architect, percy wants to be with annabeth, and grover's gonna need some kind of degree backing his environmental preservation efforts. but like, i just can't see it happening.
annabeth was tasked with redesigning olympus after the destruction of the second titan war. that project is her child. she eats, sleeps, and breathes her designs for the palace. as soon as she graduates high school, that is her number one priority. this is her monument that will last forever, this is what her hubris is driving her to accomplish. college and mortal qualifications can wait until she's finished, until olympus is perfect, until her designs are real and tangible and ready to last a thousand ages, until she's made her mother proud and her father regret pushing her aside. and if she's building a family on the side, one strong enough to withstand two wars, one who will never leave her, never let her fall alone? that will last, too.
percy never had a childhood. he can barely remember a life before his abusive stepfather gabe, before he had to grow up too fast to protect himself and his mom. he never got to celebrate getting rid of the bastard, because by then he'd been thrown headfirst into the mythological world, into the expectations that come with being a child of the big three. he's twelve years old and already the fate of the world is in his hands, and he won't fail. he's fourteen, and the weight of the world rests on his shoulders, turns his hair grey. he's sixteen, and he has to make a choice, to trust someone who had betrayed him time and time again, but he doesn't know if the outcome of that choice will be the end of the world or its only hope. he graduates high school, having lived longer than he'd ever dreamed, and does not immediately throw himself into college. it's time to experience the world that he's sacrificed so much for.
grover is the lord of the wild. he spent his whole life searching for the one being who could save the planet, could keep it whole and healthy and alive. he found him, found pan, and had his hopes crushed. pan was dying. he was giving up on the planet and the people who'd believed in him for millennia. pan put all of their hopes on grover's shoulders, made it his responsibility. he stepped up to the challege, used his passion for searching and made it passion for fixing. he started immediately, despite how dire the situation was, despite all the others telling him he was wrong, that pan was still out there, that he needed to believe in a dead god. yes, he needs to find a way to get the mortals to see the effect they're having on the wild, on the environment, on the planet, but first he needs to find out how bad things truly are. he's traveled north america, he's gathered nymphs and dryads and spirits for war against the titans, but north america isn't the only place in danger. the world is his domain, and grover will rise to the challenge.
(Using this as an opportunity to talk about architecture studies - for the record I am a civil engineering student but Iāve done some architecture classes at uni and the things Iām going to talk about are pretty universal I think).
So first off from a practical standpoint unless annabeth is going to be doing the Olympus project for the rest of her life, at some point sheāll need actual qualifications to enter the industry which is the main thing uni gives.
Secondly a huge benefit to uni architecture (at least for the courses Iāve been to) is direct feedback from qualified architects and to be in an environment with peers. Having someone talk to you about your designs and your thought processes is literally invaluable and while annabeth is a genius (Iām being genuine) having to debate with someone with a different perspective makes you stronger. Annabeth doesnāt have that company in camp or with the gods.
In relation to architecture and the books themes specifically, thereās a lot to be gained from learning about modern architecture and how design ethos has changed. (I donāt know a tonne about architecture history but) the idea behind a lot of the ancient monument buildings we have is to try and make the visitor *feel* the power of god. Usually they did this by their massive scale and immaculate craftsmanship. There was an idea that the building defines space and the activities within. More recent thoughts are about versatile designs to adapt to its inhabitants and activities. I feel like this reflects the themes of the first book series. So Annabeth learning and adopting this different design philosophy would be fitting methinks.
She is called a weather goddess because people in Kenya literally worshiped her as one.
Her claustrophobia is from being buried alive as a child.
I was really underestimating her power. While frozen as a statue and essentially unconscious she generates a storm so large that it stretches from New York (ish) all the way to somewhere in the Caribbean (where Scott has to shelter from a severe storm and almost gets hit by lightning).
Her relationship with kitty is explicitly maternal. She often refers to kitty as āmy kittenā.
She says she has night vision?
Sheās not actually super athletic at this point. At one point she used her cape to hang onto a ledge and then has to climb her cape to get back to safety. The physical effort leaves her saying all she wants to do is sleep. Compared to her other teammates sheās pretty physically weak.
She loves wearing a head scarf when sheās in casual dress.
Sheās pretty creative when she fights. Against magneto she changes the air pressure to try and sneakily exhaust him and later tries to starve him of oxygen by creating an air vacuum with a localised hurricane.
Sheās got nuanced morals. After doom turns her into a statue (explicitly the worst thing for her claustrophobia) she easily accepts his apology and him saying that they could be allies in the future. She later (after some deliberation) was about to murder magneto in his sleep.
Things I learned about Kurt Wagner (Nightcrawler) today
From Uncanny X-Men (1963) around vol. 1 issue #150
He and Logan, while not being the premier gear heads in the mansion, were the two in charge of repairing the damaged blackbird (after kittyās christmas) implying mechanical proficiency.
Kurtās powers are easier or harder to use depending on the direction of travel. The easiest is horizontal movement from North to South (following magnetic lines or something?). The hardest is a vertical teleport but even then he āported several miles directly upwards when pushed. It made him exhausted like being forced to suddenly run long distance (but he still had enough energy afterwards to swim for one hour in freezing water and then break back into a castle while evading capture so he really is just built different.)
Kurt is teeeeeny. Heās about the same size as kitty.
His bamfs arenāt loud but the smell really is a problem for stealth.
Carrying one passenger while teleporting is painful to the point of screaming for Kurt. The exertion risks killing both himself and his passenger.
He has a girlfriend! A woman called Amanda Sefton who is a magician.
I know itās just a product of Burnie burns having a very consistent writing style but hearing Church apologise to Tex in season 3 literally almost word how he apologises in season 9 still wipes me out.
I canāt believe they literally never made epsilon and Washington talk to each other. I mean obviously itās because actually addressing washās experiences in any amount of detail would immediately kill the shows tone but still. It creates the hilarious implication that for season 10-13 wash and epsilon just didnāt make eye contact and stood on opposite ends of the canyon
(The best of this post and its reblogs, but with links that work)
Here is a website where you can scroll down to all the different levels of the oceanĀ
Here is a website where you can see the future of the universe
Here is a website where you can press aĀ āmake everything okayā button, over and over, until things really are okay
Here is a website that you can read if you feel like a burden
Here is a website where you can look at strobe illusions (TW strobe/flashing)
Here is a website where you can cut stuff up (TW blood/sh)
Here and here are websites where you can play with sand
Here is a website where you can draw with macaroni and other fun foods
Here is a website where you can paint someoneās nails
Here is a website where you can grow a garden with emojis
Here is a website with hundreds of videos of people hugging you (rightfully dubbedĀ āthe nicest place on the internetā because it really is, yāall, it made me cry)
Here is a website that will take you to other useless websites
Here is a website where you can make a tiny cat play bongo drums (and other instruments!)
Here is a website to help give you gentle reminders <3
Here is a website where you can grow a tiny farm
Here is a website where you can take a bunch of scientific personality tests
Here is a website of calm rain noise
Take a breath. Itās going to be okay, I promise.
You may have already mentioned this in some of your other metas, and I just missed it, so please ignore this if it's redundant.
Do you think Bruce is projecting onto Jason by pushing him as a Robin? Obviously, Jason wanted to be Robin and was excited about it, and Bruce let Jason do other things, but (if I'm not mistaken) before Tim came into play, solidifying the whole Batman needs a Robin/support to keep him upright, Bruce and Dick becoming Batman and Robin, in the beginning, was also sort of a coping mechanism.
I think there are a few examples of Bruce enabling this kind of mindset. Like in Gotham Knights #43ā44 (sorry), every time Barbara brings up Jason's inner turmoil, Bruce refocuses on his ability as a Robin; similarly, when Jason finds out about Two-Face and his dad, he is hurt, and Bruce acknowledges that but then does the same thing, zeroing in on reassuring Jason that he made a mistake but is still a good Robin.
Like, Jason got it from Bruce, but he unintentionally encouraged that kind of thinking.
oh, i definitely think that bruce is projecting on jason and that it profoundly affected jay. and, while every single one of your observations is apt, i would add that what truly made it so tragic is that he projected his own worst traits on jason while being blind to the fact that jay already shared his best qualities.
tldr: bruce projects himself on jason in terms of grief (saying that jason needs vigilantism to work his grief through) and sees his own worst traits in jason (anger) but doesn't see his own best traits in jay (compassion, love, and sensitivity). ironically, jason does end up developing all of the (projected) worst characteristics of bruce (obsessiveness, and relentlessness in pursuit of the respective perceived idea of justice). this happens even though they were barely present in his early storylines, and only ever manifested when jason was scared or lost. later, they truly came to be because of his trauma relating to vigilantism.
and the long, long version, coming with panels and quotes: under the cut.
first i want to say that the following analysis focuses very specifically on bruce's mistakes, but i don't view the overall of jay's upbringing by bruce solely in these terms. from text it is also clear that bruce deeply loves and cares about jay, and that jay enjoys being robin. now that this is clear, let's get to particularities, and start with jay's origin story.
i truly never stop thinking about the significance of bruce meeting jay in the crime alley, the place of his parents' death. there's a lot to be said about it, but here the focus is, of course, on the fact that he sees a little boy, very much similar to himself, angry and hurt, in the same scenery that brought him so much grief. and jay in some ways does appear to be a mirror of bruce's own agonies, as well as a mirror of his own inclination for seeking justice; and somehow, bruce fixates on the first one, while almost completely dismissing the latter.
bruce looks at him and assumes that the remedy to jason's pain and anger is being robin; and he doesn't stop to think about it. (it has to be noted that there's also classism at play, classism that is mostly a result of writers' own beliefs āĀ collins did state in a couple of interviews that that the motivation behind jason's background was to make his introduction into vigilantism seem less offensive, as jason has already been exposed to crime...)
i think, in this context, it's interesting to look at the two-face storyline even closer, and from the start too. in the beginning, bruce talks of jason's 'street' roots and assumes jay would go "down the same criminal road that took his father [willis] to an early death." he also talks of jason making a lot of progress. later, in batman #411, after jason learns that willis has been killed by two-face, bruce comments that jay "has never been like this...listless...almost pouting--"
this all, along with jay's cheerful and diligent behaviour from the previous issue builds an interesting picture for us: because we essentially learn that jay has been overall an unproblematic child. bruce, of course, attributes this "progress" to the training. however, for anyone else, the logical conclusion would be that jay's quick adjustment was simply a matter of finding himself in a safe and stable environment and receiving continuous support and attention from a parental figure. i find it rather questionable that jason's personality softened down because he had something to punch in the caveāā the more intuitive explanation is of course that he was angry and quick to fight when they first met because he couldn't afford anything else and because he was scared. but months later, in a loving home, he can allow himself to drop his guard; and his cocky attitude disappears until much later.
so the rather unsettling picture that we derive is that bruce is training jay to become a vigilante in order to "channel" his (nonvisible at this point) anger into something useful and just. and he clearly links this to his own trauma in batman #416 (thatās already starlin btw), in his conversation with dick, explaining why he took jay in: āheās so full of anger and frustration⦠he reminds me of myself, just after my parents were killed.ā bruce also mentions that soon after their first meeting, jason helped him and "handled himself well" in the fight, but he doesn't mention that jay has ran away from a crime "school" and intended to stop injustice on his own only because he was ignored.
the theme of bruce comparing jay to himself appears again in detective comics #574 (barr), where it is approached with a much more... critical look, thanks to leslie's presence and her skepticism of bruce's actions. after jason has suffered nearly fatal injuries at the hand of the mad hatter, bruce reminisces on his own trauma and motives. he tells leslie: "i didn't choose jason for my work. he was chosen by it...as i was chosen." leslie replies: "stop that! (...) you do this for yourself... you're still that little boy (...)" then, the conversation steers to the familiar ground and the topic of anger. in bruce's words, again: āi wanted to give jason an outlet for his rageā¦wanted him to expunge his anger and get on with his lifeā¦ā and finishes "and instead, i may have killed him."
the recognition that bruce's projection on jason and involving him with his work might have fatal consequences is, as always, fast forgotten once jay wakes up and proclaims that he wants to continue his work as robin.
but to circle back, i think there's something else worth our attention, something deeply ironic, that is showcased in that issue: that bruce has no evidence for jay's "rage." when leslie talks of bruce's past, she recalls his tendencies to get into brutal fights at perceived injustice as early as in school; when bruce talks of jason, two pictures that are juxtaposed, are that of jason fighting as robin and jason... smiling, playing baseball.
so, in the early days of jason's training and work in the field, we see bruce talking of jason's anger a lot; but we barely see it.
that being said, jay is angry sometimesā and i think your observation about how bruce deals with it is incredibly interesting and accurate.
we first see jay truly and devastatingly angry in the two-face storyline. bruce focuses on jay's reaction as robin, which is, in fact, aggressive. but something that he barely addresses is that jason's first reaction is sleeping all day, and not beating anyone to a pulp; in fact, this vengeful instinct seems to arise only when he is put right in front of two-face. and his third instinct, once the rage (very quickly) dies down after the altercation with two-face, is crying, because bruce hid the truth about willis' death from him. jay, while crying, asks bruce: "you have taken me out into combat-- but you spare me this?" in response, bruce lectures jason about how grief inspires revenge, which is, again, deeply ironic, given that jay seeking out revenge seemed to be prompted and enabled solely by the role of robin. moreover, his question suggests that at this point he saw grief ("you spare me this") and fighting as two different things.
the final is, as you said, bruce focusing on making it into a lesson on vigilantism, or, in his own words, "tempering revenge into justice." personally, i think in this way bruce directs jason to bring his grief into the field as a powering force, something that he didn't necessarily have an own incentive to do. the flash of compartmentalisation between his ordinary life and being a sidekick that jay has shown by questioning bruce's decision is lost. emotions are now a robin thing, and they have an (informal) protocol, a moral code. and when jay is confronted with an emotionally exhausting case next āĀ the garzonas case, i believe that the focus on "tempering revenge into justice" is exactly the problemāĀ we don't see jay crying, we see him frantic about finding the solution. this, right there, is bruce's obsessiveness, that in my opinion, was developed in jay specifically as a result of how his engagement with vigilantism combines with his deep sensitivity.
and, needless to say, his sensitivity is all the same as that of bruce ā they both can't stand looking at other people hurting, they both wear their hearts on their sleeve, caring way too much ā the thing is, bruce never quite acknowledges how they are similar in this matter. instead, he focuses on his sparse bursts of anger, wanting to bring jason closure in his grief the only way he knows it āĀ in a fight for a better world. so, as you said, he focuses on jason's ability as robin.
which just doesn't work for jason. at all. we know it from how his robin run comes to an end: in the first issue of a death in the family (batman #426) alfred informs: āiāve come upon him, several times, looking at that battered old photograph of his mother and father, crying.āĀ to that, bruce contends: āin other words, i may have started jason as robin before he had a chance to come to grips with his parents deaths.ā he also tells jay that the field is not a place for someone who is hurting; a message that is the opposite of what he's been saying for years now, and something that i imagine was difficult for bruce to conceptualise, because then he would have to question his own unhealthy tendencies. it's a bit late to come to this realisation; bruce's self-projection that caused him to worry so much about jay's anger has already turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy that will fully manifest itself in utrh, when jason does the only thing he was taught to do with grief: try to channel it into justice.
As an Aussie listening to Sweeney Todd is kind of funny because we are supposed to believe that being sent to Australia literally drove Sweeney mad or is a big part of his disillusionment with the world and like⦠no, Australia was actually pretty chill for the convicts (of course all of this ease came from stealing and murdering First Nations people, like I can not emphasise enough how colonisation was genocide. There was a house which the First Nations people literally called the killing house because the inhabitants would give poisoned bread to the people there). But in the early days of the colonisation there literally werenāt enough soldiers to really force the prisoners to do anything so the convicts worked when they liked and however much they liked. Later on when things like the barracks were actually established things did get worse for convicts but thereās a reason so many convicts sent for their wives. Iām supposed to imagine Sweeney Todd more or less chilling in sunny Botany Bay and see a man being driven mad by the cruelty of the world. Yeah ok.
in your fic āpaint it overā is that how you imagine jason making it out of the explosion at the end of utrh? not exactly the events that follow, but the preferable characterization of bruce digging jay out of the rubble and carrying him to help. and how do you think jason made it out canonically (without the help of bruce) also!!! what are your thoughts on the specifics of jasonās scar and how heād behave toward it. i liked the part of your fic where jason was temporarily unable to speak due to the trauma his neck received. i think the scar is something that rests on the junction of his shoulder/neck, and that can be hidden with whatever clothes he wears -> no one knows he has it (or how he got it) either. i like to imagine while bruce knows his batarang made contact with jasonās throat itās never fully registered to him that it scarred until he sees it for himself (and while i believe bruce would turn the moment in head over and over again until itās engraved in his brain, his delayed realizationāto meāis due to his repression of the occurrence)
oh i adore this whole ask. some of it i explained in my notes, but this fanfic is quite dear to me, so i will elaborate.
short answer to whether this is how i imagine jay making it out of the explosion: not exactly?
the premise that i wanted to explore with paint it over is almost the opposite of a fix-it, and definitely not what i believe it should be in canon.
what i wished to explore there is, however, the part of utrh that is perhaps the most shocking to many readers: that bruce leaves jason to die.
in-universe, i think the answer why it happens is surprisingly simple enough: bruce does not come because he is just... not there. my understanding is, that in a way, the events of under the red hood did not happen. there is nothing to follow. that purple mist in the finale of the utrh, that is often read as a force resurrecting jason (not technically wrong, either)- i believe that is the timeline already rewriting itself, making the whole story into something that was not.
and the reason for the above is the infinite crisis. if i'm not wrong, it's also the inifinite crisis miniseries where bruce meets dick right after the explosions in (or of) bludhaven-- that in batman clearly happens in the background of his confrontation with jay. however, in infinite crisis (#4, just checked it now), bruce tells dick: "i wanted to make sure...you're alright... i was in new york when it hit. got here as soon as i could." which could be a lie or a matter of the editorial not being synced enough- but i'm willing to give them a benefit of the doubt given how it ties with that sudden, stunted ending of utrh.
this makes sense for canon for several reasons. in the animated movie, since it spares us the infinite crisis tie-in, bruce says of the whole incident: this changes nothing. it changes nothing because although aditf isn't, utrh is a tragedy; it changes nothing because since his death, jason is necessarily always pushed at the peripheries of the narrative, no matter how much the fate itself tries to fix it, becoming a tragic footnote. the dead have one right and it's the right to remain silent. and that is ironically ensured on a cosmic level, with his violent attempt at being seen hidden in the folds of the timeline. you can also see it clearly in canon -- i believe it was not until the infinite frontier that the events of utrh got just tangentially mentioned (before that, even lobdell barely touched upon it). other than that, they have no consequences; they are barely ever spoken of; they seem to slip out even from jay's solo comics.
this move was necessary for batman, as a character and as a title: let's say bruce does hold red hood as he does in the alt cover of annual 25 (and the cover of the deluxe edition of utrh.) that would implore a reckoning with his failure and his (suddenly non-productive) grief that would either reconstruct the whole myth or lead to some terrifying implications. these terrifying implications are, essentially, what paint it over is about. it's about the worst happening and about there being no way back from it. and jason, in receiving what he wanted (his father's love and care) wants to deny that reality. they both want to. yet even jay cannot ignore it completely -- and i chose to use the batarang injury to emphasize it.
and about the scar: i mentioned it briefly before, but in the au jason aggravates the wounds on purpose, hence it will scar worse and cause long-term issues for his voice. it's a theme i also keep in some of my other stories (to come...) and i very much think this is what would happen in canon if he had to take care of that injury. yet as it healed, i believe he'd take to hiding it, mostly. still, as it stands, my primary take might be that in canon (if it was to follow the interference into the timeline from the crisis at least) jason would simply end up with no scar at all, and only memories for evidence of what happened, which is perhaps worse for him too (but of course better for bruce. and as it happens, this is bruce wayne's story and everyone else is just living in it- or dies in it- for better or worse. and if we're ignoring that metaphysical timeline bullshit, as you said, i believe bruce would repress it all anyway.)