fucked up.

don’t report if you don’t have an ed just leave.

[thisishowidisappear000]

i broke up with my ex a few months ago, but i still lived w him

immediately started a situationship with a manipulator ass liar who used all my problems and insecurities to get me as obsessed w him as possible

this man thought he would be the hero in my story, the only light i had to live for. Well he physically assaulted me and became stalkerish when i eventually pulled away

meanwhile i had to sleep in the same room w my ex because i’m broke af and he tried to 🍇 me a few times

i think this is a cycle that never ends and it’s my own fault; i was born evil and seek evilness around me. forever. no matter what i do.

[menheratenshipien]

About a month ago i got banned from reddit and I've been reposting my posts ever since so have this

[headsinthecl0uds]

i'm suffering anyway i might as well be skinny while i'm at it

[ijustwanttobeskinny22]

deadass

[brain-go-brrrrr]

Currently getting over a break up and relapsing on my ed and sh 💪😤

[thisishowidisappear000]

after everything, it’s still you

so moved out, i’m not living in a constant state of fear and triggers, I live alone, in a great big city that I love.

I broke up..well, it’s complicated. He's still the most important person in my life but I dont want to think of this as a problem, I dont have the energies to fix it.

I still hate food: I’m “healthy”, recovered, but my mind remains the same. also i’m on here bc i relapsed so

I thought recovery shoul've been about starting fresh and new, but no matter where you go, who you pretend to be, it's still you.

[thisishowidisappear000]

I will weight myself again on sunday

pray for me

[thisishowidisappear000]

bro i lost 3kgs in 2 days how is that possibile

i’m not complaining tho

[thisishowidisappear000]

all my certainties disappeared when i found out that 10k steps are like 150 cals and not 500

[thisishowidisappear000]

I will kill myself why am I a fucking people pleaser

[ghoulsgoulsgouls]

“I am so sorry for hurting you while I was trying to hurt myself.”

[thisishowidisappear000]

my friend said that I “eat like in war time”

I was like 💀

[thisishowidisappear000]

I absolutely love the fact that the ciobar zero has only 80/75 cals if you use almond milk

I love shit like that

[thisishowidisappear000]

I need tips that aren’t the normal ones like exercise!! starve!! (i already know that) for losing weight i’m begging

[thisishowidisappear000]

oh my fucking god i feel his dirty hands all around me.

[thisishowidisappear000]

so like i’m back to my restriction phase since 10th of february

and today I was really excited about my pants fitting really good again and I told my bf “look I already lost 4,5 lbs!!”

and like he told me “great! let’s see how happy we will be in a month when I’ll be hugging a skeleton and you will disappear”

i..yeah.

[thisishowidisappear000]

I just remembered that time when I was scared of professional diets and my therapist advised me to go to this nutritionist that “put this deadly-skinny girl on a diet that made her not gain weight at all”

isn’t this a little too pro an4 for u miss??🤨

[thisishowidisappear000]

so after a long time of fake recovery I am doing this again

This time i will be less hard with myself, my cal limit is now 500cals (but i hardly never eat this much) and when I fast for more than 24 hours I reward myself (when I am forced to eat) with something low cal that I really love like strawberries or lentils etc.

i’m so happy tho cause I found a lot of new food that are low cal but don’t taste like the absolute shit I used to eat in my honeymoon phase!!