manifesting.. 🙏

tannertan36
AnasAbdin
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

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$LAYYYTER

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@thisisnotchelle
manifesting.. 🙏
“Fall in love with someone who’s comfortable with your silence. Find someone who doesn’t need your words to know it’s time to kiss you.”
— Unknown
I could still remember how badly I cried that day at the sanctuary questioning God what did I do in the past to deserve such pain and heart breaks. Looking back, I thought I couldn’t make it being a single mom, not until I realized it’s good being alone rather than be with someone who puts too much stressed and toxicity in your life. It has been a long journey, mommah Chelle!
Now, Iam 6months pregnant with my second born, been with the love of my life for one year and seven months.. Not too long though, but I guess it’s not about how long you two been together, as long as you both are willing to compromised yung’ anong meron kayo ngayon. Thankful as always. I might be feeling sad at times, but I’d rather love to feel those happiness and sadness as long I am with you.
Felt a little bit inspired that’s why I post this. Ang random lang ng ganitong pakiramdam while waiting for him to get home from work. Thank you for choosing me mahal.. I truly appreciate every small details that you are doing and sacrificing for our future family. And also, I am forever thankful that you accept Me and Renzo are comes in a package, instant daddy ka.
Can’t wait to see our little bum, lucky to get experience the rest of my years with you.
a lot.
Send me a letter to my inbox
A- are you single? B- birthday? C- crush? D- did u get ur first kiss? E- easiest person to talk to? F- favorite song? G- good at? H- hair color? I- in love? J- jealous of? K- known as? L- longest relationship? M- middle name? N- number? O- one wish? P- person last texted? Q- question always asked? R- reason to smile? S- song last listened to T- time you woke up? U- 3 biggest wishes? V- violent moment? W- worst fear? X- ex you still liked after it was ended? Y- your last hug? Z- zodiac sign?
Facts about me being here at Tumblr
✨ Tumblrista since 2012
✨ I blocked most of my friends who follows me here (so if you can still see my post and we're friends in real life then lucky you, lol)
✨ I usually follows blog who shares their personal experiences and dramas, bcos that's where I could learn something new.
✨ I don't usually write when I'm happy. Most of my kwento and dramas are when i'm feeling sad, or when anxiety attacks
✨ My boyfriend knows that I have a Tumblr account but he never try to open this because he knows that im uncomfortable with it. Hehe
✨ this is my safe haven
“There are so many things can make you happy. Don’t focus too much on things that make you sad.”
— Unknown
My stalking skills surprise me sometimes too..
So, it's over on the internet about privacy issues. If it's okay lang ba to check your bf/gf phone. We all have different point of views regarding that, and I respect everyone's opinion kahit ang cliche ng sinabi ni Ellen Adarna that she's referring to someone's beauty and labelled thru external attributes.
In our case, ako yung pala-check ng phone and socmed accounts ni boyfie. I asked him if it's okay with him, and he said yes. It's really not a big deal at all.
So here's the kwento nga.
Di naman kami everyday magkasama ni boyfriend, pag nagkikita lang kame like twice a month doon ko lang naman nachecheck ang phone niya and wala rin naman akong access sa socmed accounts niya.
Last Saturday morning, maaga ako nagising and I checked his phone. I looked for a 'keyword' just to clarify things or icheck yun mutual nila nung Ex niya (which is aware si boyfriend doon na may grudge ako dun sa tao kase nakita ko one time July 2020 tumatawag pa sakanya si girl kahit almost a year na silang hiwalay) ayun nga, I opened one messenger sa mutual nila and there I saw chats that was year 2019 pa (hindi pa kame magkakilala by this time)
To my surprised.. Nag-message si Boyfriend doon sa friend and telling her that
"nakita na na ng mga kawork ko si Kai, may kamukha daw syang manager dito *sends pic*" i was really shocked nung nakita ko yung picture, guess what, Selfie ko yung naka-send.
Following that message, "magkasama ba kayo? Pakita mo sakanya, taena kamukha niya jan sa picture na yan hahaha"
and the conversation goes on. The Ex replied the day after using yung messenger nung friend and sabi "di ko naman kamukha eh"
Hindi ko alam kung anong dapat kong maramdaman. Napatingin ako sa selfie ko na yun, inisip ko kung saan nakuha ni boyfriend yung picture ko that time kasi hindi ko pa naman sya kilala and hindi kame friend sa FB. Hindi ko alam irereact ko nung nabasa ko yon. Kamukha ko ba sya? Yung conversation August 2019 pa, nagkakilala kame November 2019, we became official January 2020.
Yung feeling na napapaisip ako, may resemblance ba kami nung Ex niya kaya niya rin ako jinowa? Pano kung isipin ni ex na "ay yan yung sinabi ni Mac na kamukha ko ah, jinowa niya yan kasi kamukha ko daw" kung ano ano na tumatakbo sa isip ko.
Hindi ko alam kung need ko pa ba to i-open up sakanya since hindi pa naman kame related sa isa't isa nung binitawan niya yung mga salitang yun.
Pero nasasaktan ako just by thinking of it. :(
My 1am thoughts:
🍒 stop overthinking
🍒 stop bad spending of money
🍒 Drink too much water
🍒 maintain weight, kahit goal weight achieved na
🍒 wag muna ako mabuntis. Hahahahahah
Hoy, i've been seeing preggy videos na sobrang unexpected pati tuloy tarot reading pinatos ko na. Praning na praning na talaga ako..hahhaahha
rebloggin' this coz Im 3months preggy now. Just wow. Haha! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
"After this quarantine we will be together for a lifetime" - Mac
How can I be so lucky. 😭😭😭
im sorry baby if mommy is crying right now.. im sorry for feeling sad tonight, baby 😔😔
Unexpectedly, met one of my highschool batchmate. Tho, na-recognize ko na sya atfirst pero di ako nag-approach. Haha! Kasi she was like
"mom, whats your order? Me i'll get the brewed coffee lang"
So while transacting she kept on looking at my nameplate, assuming na kilala niya din ako. Then she asked..
"are you from Dasma North? Coz u look familiar"
Me: uhm, oo, why?
Girl: yah, i see, ikaw yun taga-section1! Ilang years kana as Barista?
(the way she asked me obviously hindi niya na-recognized na ako yung Manager on duty not until makita niya si Ghia, wearing a blue uniform)
Me: 4years na.
Girl: ohh wait, ikaw yun Manager?
Me: haha yes. Di lang halata.
Girl: halaa grabeee ang galing. Actually, barista din ako ngayon sa *toot toot*
Me: ah niceeee!
Girl: suspended ako one week. You wanna know why? Just because hindi ko inallowed pumasok sa store yun anak ng isang na guest na 14y/o. Haha! Funny right? 15yrs old below is not allowed naman talaga mag dine in or pumasok sa mall. But it turns out na kakilala nila yun may-ari ng shop at ki-nomplaint ako as impolite approach, which is ginawa ko lang naman ang tama. You know what, gusto ko talaga pumasok sa Coffee Bean, twice na ko nagpasa ng resume but i didn't received any call. Haha! Nakakatuwa lang to see some of my batchmates are achieving their goals right now.. While me eto, pa-suspend suspend lang sa trabaho and wala pa rin na-aacchieve as of this moment. 😂 Well, siguro kanya-kanya talaga tayo ng time. And mine's not right now.
..
After hearing her short confession, what i have realized..
Your job right now is someone else's dream job, BE GRATEFUL..
Not a gamer.
So one time sa sobrang paranoid ko binuksan ko yun ML ng jowa ko. Tas nakita ko dun na connected pa sila nung Ex niya, inisa-isa ko pa yung parang friendlist don or active list ata yon, kasi ano ba namang malay ko kung nag uusap sila or naglalaro pa sila non.
(kung ano ano kasi nakikita ko sa facebook, atsaka malay ko ba dun sa ML na yan)
May naka install din sa phone ko na ML pero si Mac ang naglalaro pag magkasama kami. Never ko pa un itry na laruin or pag-aralan.
Nalungkot lang ako kasi never naman namin pinag awayan ung paglalaro nyang un, di naman ako immature para magpaka toxic dun. Nalungkot lang ako kasi sana man lang hindi na sila connected dun, na sana nga hindi sila naglalaro na. Alam naman nyang ang laki ng grudge ko dun sa tao, kaso it turns out lang na tama lagi yung hinala ko.
Ayoko kasi pilitin gawin ung isang bagay ng dahil lang gusto ko syang sabayan.
---just a mababaw story na gusto ko lang ishare---
My 1am thoughts:
🍒 stop overthinking
🍒 stop bad spending of money
🍒 Drink too much water
🍒 maintain weight, kahit goal weight achieved na
🍒 wag muna ako mabuntis. Hahahahahah
Hoy, i've been seeing preggy videos na sobrang unexpected pati tuloy tarot reading pinatos ko na. Praning na praning na talaga ako..hahhaahha
trip talaga natin tumambay sa tumblr ng ganitong oras 🙂
our 2nd valentine's together
Kapag masaya ka talaga hindi mo na maiisip magsulat. Just the thought of looking lang at the picture, you get to think kahit yun mga small details lang na nangyari noong araw na yan.
Typical na nag-coffee date, then dinner date.
But the time we spent of talking about life, future, and even chismis sa ibang tao (haha lol!) sobrang ichecherish mo talaga.
Don't get me wrong, cavite-muntinlupa lang ang peg namin, everyday kaming may contact thru any means of communication pero hindi pa din kami nauubusan ng pag-uusapan especially pag magkasama.
And syempre hindi mawawala jan ang mga pag iinarte ko na "ikaw na bahala kung ano kakainin natin", almost a year with this guy and alam na alam ko kung paano sya inisin with my actions. Haha! I love you.