This Is Rainey's Journey

[thisisraineysjourney]

Transformation Time!

Sometimes you need to look back and realize yesterday you was just as fabulous as you are today. Give yourself grace and bask in all of your accomplishments.

This was written a few years back and tucked away in my drafts. I didn’t post it, truthfully because I thought it was arrogant and not all that great. Looking at it today it speaks volumes to my heart and soul. Why wouldn’t I share this…Enjoy! I’ve never been big on New Year’s resolutions but goals, goals have been a huge part of my success for almost as long as my youngest is old. In 2010…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Unease

There is something odd about the world today. Seeing other people share stories much like mine. It’s odd because here you are a picture of success but your past would be no indicator of it.

You see people discussing sexual predators, molesters, pedophiles, rapists, the list goes on and on.

You’re happy that they see it now, the injustice of it all, the shock, and all you want to do is…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Currency

I stand in line to make my purchase and exchange currency for goods.  I see him, the beginning of this story, did he know what he did, does he understood what he stole?  He doesn’t, nobody really does.  I complete my purchase and I walk towards him, eyes locked, I know, he knows and the story begins. Currency.

So much of my life was exchanged for guilt, shame, fear, remorse.  All I wanted was…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Love Me...Please.... Thought I would share this with you. I've been experiencing a great deal of anxiety and tonight after I took time to face it beauty was born. I am still the woman I once was. The desire is the same it's just hidden a bit more. . . Check out my latest blog post. . Link to my blog on my page. . http://thisisraineysjourney.com/2020/03/27/love-me-please/ . . . #thisisraineysjourney #fibrowarrior #fibromyalgia #fibromyalgiaawareness #chronicillness #spoonie #spoonielife #chronesdisease #thrombophilia #pulmonaryembolismsurvivor #factor7mutation #psd #ptsdrecovery #pmdd #highfunctioningdepression #endometriosis #womenwholift #kneerehabilitation #metoo #iamasurvivor #traumasurvivor #iamforher #writer #bossbabe #lovetoread https://www.instagram.com/p/B-OXFSQntOi/?igshid=15ot7tg6l5oop

[thisisraineysjourney]

Love Me...Please

Love Me…Please

Tonight I spent some time writing in a twenty three year old journal. I purchased it when I first arrived to Arizona during my first marriage. It’s only half full and most entries are during my episodes of great love or great sadness. There were mention of lost friends, lost love, and some adventures. There were overwhelming feelings of great despair. The cry to be loved. It’s all I ever really…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Thursday I did a little grocery shopping on my day off. I did it under the radar and didn't go crazy. But I was worried. Worried about people and their reactions. . . I am glad I did because the world is crazy right now. Am I concerned? Definitely. But less about the virus and more about people and flattening the curve. . . I will go out as little as possible not because it's the end of the world but because of science. For those who need to go out keep it clean and at a distance. . . It'll be a trying few weeks maybe longer. Told my husband today "well it looks like this will be the first world crisis we survive together". Do I have fear? Yes. Do I have anxiety? Of course. . . Let's be kind, rational, and if you have extra please share with those who couldn't get their groceries in time. . . #thisisraineysjourney #fibrowarrior #fibromyalgia #fibromyalgiaawareness #chronicillness #spoonie #spoonielife #chronesdisease #thrombophilia #pulmonaryembolismsurvivor #factor7mutation #psd #ptsdrecovery #pmdd #highfunctioningdepression #endometriosis #womenwholift #kneerehabilitation #metoo #iamasurvivor #traumasurvivor #iamforher #writer #bossbabe #lovetoread #covid_19 #socialdistancing #flattenthecurve https://www.instagram.com/p/B9uTMObHijg/?igshid=bpk7q0bzwizh

[thisisraineysjourney]

I'm Not Smart Enough

I'm Not Smart Enough

It hit me today. I’m smart. Imagine going through life thinking that. Imagine finishing in the top 30% of your high school class, completing your undergrad in your thirties, while working a full time, intense job, raising three kids while your husband worked nights, and not just going to school part time but full time. Four classes a semester for three years. Starting a job as the receptionist…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

You'll Never Make It On Your Own

You’ll Never Make It On Your Own

Trauma courses through my veins it races through my mind.  Simply seeing a car on the side of the road opened the floodgate of memories that have been stuffed down so far only flashes sneak through, but now they flow as free as thought.  I wrote 12,000 words in twenty four hours,12,000 words. I think that’s the word count needed for a short novel.  My entire traumatic life in 12,000 words the…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Congratulations #dafnewiswell #dafneann for taking hold of your dreams and never letting go. I hope this is the first of many books published. In fact one day I hope to join you. You are an inspiration to myself and many others. #thisisraineysjourney #dafnewiswell #dafneann #breakthrough #holisticlifecoach #prayerjournal https://www.instagram.com/p/Bxs9Q9-F_Uz/?igshid=1jkuy4k7gvz6x

[thisisraineysjourney]

Exhausted...

Exhausted…

I’m sitting at my dirty kitchen table waiting for my potato and leeks to start to boil so I can start the timer. My mind was racing as I was washing the dishes I dirtied to start my food prep for the week. I’m exhausted…I can barely keep my eyes open but if I don’t do these things my week will suck so bad because I’ll make bad food choices. I’m also waiting for the timer to go off for the washer…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Another run complete. Only 5 days till the 5k. Keep me in your thoughts as I have a reoccurring flare that should come this week. If it does I won't be able to run due to the complications it causes. Till then I'm going to train as if it's a non-issue. #thisisraineysjourney 25k #runforseniors #endometriosis #fibromyalgiaawareness #adrenalfatigue #migrainewarrior #ptsdrecovery #pulmonaryembolismsurvivor #thrombophilia https://www.instagram.com/p/Bw272_eFHdT/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1etnj9bblqdv4

[thisisraineysjourney]

Valentine's gift from Hubby. Homemade gifts are the best. Check out J&J Custom Printing on Facebook to see his other great custom creations.#thisisraineysjourney #happyvalentinesday❤️ https://www.instagram.com/p/Bt4dmUrF6eH/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=o4ap6dci953r

[thisisraineysjourney]

With all the foods that I'm sensitive too along with my calorie restrictions there's not a whole lot of "treats" left that I like. I'm trying to stretch and explore new options. I'm in no way a sugar free fan but this is pretty good. Soy sugar free vanilla latte. Thank you ethos!! #thisisraineysjourney #sugarfreelatte #ethos #foodsensitivities #eliminationdiettime #fibromyalgiaawareness #endometriosis #pulmonaryembolismsurvivor #ptsd #traumasurvivor (at Ethos Coffee Cafe) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtlYkxxFTaZ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=16gkxdbf93zif

[thisisraineysjourney]

My Super Power

The past few months I’ve been finding the balance between humility and confidence, between stretching and stuffing myself into a box. I’ve been testing my new limits and understanding where to stop before I run right across that line.

As I navigate through my professional career and overall amazing life I am regularly faced with choices, choices I never had before. Ten years ago the choice…

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[thisisraineysjourney]

Best tacos and Menudo in San Antonio. That is except my Menudo. #thisisraineysjourney (at Rocky's Taco House) https://www.instagram.com/p/BtbcCxpFkuN/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=otnsw08moljh

[thisisraineysjourney]

#dailymeditationgoals #dailyyogagoals #thisisraineysjourney #fibromyalgiaawareness #hpxlife #pulmonaryembolisurvivor #endometriosis #mentalhealthawareness https://www.instagram.com/p/BtLWyB_Ff3p/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1vipyxlkcus4t

[thisisraineysjourney]

This man has still not been caught. Our family has survived a great evil. We wish he could be caught and brought to justice, in spite of that we continue to live our lives to the fullest, his actions do not get the final say in our life. #thisisraineysjourney #metoo #ptsd #traumasurvivor https://www.instagram.com/p/Bs8VFDqFTGr/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=113z0cdtpido5