this stable ground @thisstableground - Tumblr Blog

I DID IT

#answered ALL the questions even though i was VERY BORED OF CELLS BY THE END #wow i do not know what to do with myself now

second assignment DONE! if i ever draw an azo compound again im going to jam my hexagon stencil right into my eyeballs

now i just have. One day in which to do my entire cell bio assignment ha ha oops

#its easier than chem tho #every time i submit for that module im like. i mightve just made ALL this shit up

prokopetz

"Online fandoms used to be kinder" buddy, when I was a teenager people used to build entire websites as "hate shrines" to specific characters they disliked, then get together and form webrings entirely devoted to hating that character. A puzzling number concerned the girlfriends of random X-Men.

#literally discovered what fanfiction was through a snark site when i was but a wee 12 year old #remember when doing a line-by-line MST3K style takedown of someone's fic was a totally normal thing

clowndensation

he has 2 electrons... who? the boy reading this...

shocked--kwarrtz

first final assignment handed in, only two more and 9 days until i am DONE with second year and i will have my life back and can have hobbies and a personality and thoughts again

#im only doing one module at a time for third year lol #yall im gonna get SO much writing done once summer is here #and get back into drawing

neptunianfairy

landscapeexposurenetwork

Photos by https://neptunianfairy.tumblr.com/post/785083490030977024

picnics-in-markarth

These are blooming everywhere outside my apartment and it smells so nice!

maniatown

Girl whose most frequent mistake is inaction voice: wow I keep making mistakes I better not do anything

a success at the dr for once in this shortlived but turbulent bipolar assessment journey! i knew that my love for finding sources for all my arguments wouldn't let me down

#i wont underestimate the NHS ability to ignore everything anyway and still refuse the referral #but GP is going to try again to get it put through and also thinks that mostly they're just trying to pawn patients back to primary care #theyll probably realise pretty quick im way more annoying to them this way #yes i WILL memorise the relevant NICE clinical guideline codes just so i can cite my exact sources aloud without having to check my noteboo #for the drama

they closed my referral, so pretty much the ruling seems to be "if you take the quetiapine and get worse then we'll re-instate it and if not, tough shit" like y'all fuckers haven't even met me one time yet and i didnt ever agree to taking quetiapine because theres no logic behind prescribing me it

#they did remove the cannabis abuse diagnosis tho lmao #so theres that #ill get some more clarification on wednesday but i am not pleased with this

thisstableground

i forgot how much fun it is when you go to the doctor with an incredibly well researched and articulated point and they go. nah here's another random drug with no explanation that in all honesty kind of seems counterintuitive to what you were asking, and no further information on whether you'll be getting an actual proper assessment at any time soon

thisstableground

shoutout to the retired elderly man who saw me crying and punching the wall outside and took me for a cup of tea though. if mental health crises have taught me anything its that older people who have been put through the wringer by life are usually located outside of any medical facility and they are always ready provide you with free food, drink or cigarettes bc that's not the first time it's happened to me

thisstableground

hey dont worry guys! i checked my NHS app and sure, i've still not got anything useful through, but my bipolar assessment referral has completely disappeared from that section, AND they've added a misleading substance abuse diagnosis to my health record!

thisstableground

ive turned the corner into being really mad. i found the info about what they'd be prescribing me in my patient notes - 25mg quetiapine, no titration upwards. i'm only a second year chem student so ill accept that maybe they have arcane reasoning that will be explained to me in my followup with the GP next week or that i've misunderstood my research, but the therapeutic dose for quetiapine for mood stabilisation or treatment of mania or depression is usually around 300mg according to clinical guidelines, effects starting at around 150mg. at 25mg it's primarily a potent H1 receptor antagonist, largely sedative with no real action on mood.

you wanna know what else functions primarily as a potent H1 receptor antagonist, largely sedative with no real action on mood, useful for sleep? fucking 15mg mirtazapine, which i'm already on. and which they recommend i stay on alongside the 25mg quetiapine, for some reason. if i wanted a stronger sleepytime effect i'd halve the medication i'm already on (more sedative action at lower dose) because i know i tolerate it well with minimal side effects but im not DOING that because i didn't come in asking for sleep treatment!! if i add quetiapine on top of it there's no benefit to my mood but there is, i'm pretty sure, a risk of stacking the sedative, metabolic and anticholinergenic side effects. so i'll be just as sad and unstable but also sleepy, hungry and dry-mouthed. GREAT THANKS DOCTOR WHOEVER YOU ARE WHO I'VE NEVER MET hey any word on that waiting list?? any word on whether you are actually putting my referral through or was the lunchtime call with the GP enough for you to make a full diagnostic statement? i'm not taking your fucking 25mg quetiapine until a specialist can explain the logic

#IS THE PLAN TO JUST MAKE ME SO SLEEPY I DONT HAVE THE ENERGY TO BE SAD #BECAUSE JOKES ON YOU I CAN BE SO DEPRESSED EVEN WHEN I AM TIRED AND FULL OF BRAIN FOG #id almost say thats actually the main thing that categorises a depressive state for me!!! wow!!!

thisstableground

i forgot how much fun it is when you go to the doctor with an incredibly well researched and articulated point and they go. nah here's another random drug with no explanation that in all honesty kind of seems counterintuitive to what you were asking, and no further information on whether you'll be getting an actual proper assessment at any time soon

thisstableground

shoutout to the retired elderly man who saw me crying and punching the wall outside and took me for a cup of tea though. if mental health crises have taught me anything its that older people who have been put through the wringer by life are usually located outside of any medical facility and they are always ready provide you with free food, drink or cigarettes bc that's not the first time it's happened to me

thisstableground

hey dont worry guys! i checked my NHS app and sure, i've still not got anything useful through, but my bipolar assessment referral has completely disappeared from that section, AND they've added a misleading substance abuse diagnosis to my health record!

#motherfucker if you wouldnt put alcohol abuse on there for a few glasses of wine a week leave me and my low-volume weed useage alone #edit: turns out that was from my adhd dr just before i did the bipolar referral so its probably fucked me from the start

thisstableground

i forgot how much fun it is when you go to the doctor with an incredibly well researched and articulated point and they go. nah here's another random drug with no explanation that in all honesty kind of seems counterintuitive to what you were asking, and no further information on whether you'll be getting an actual proper assessment at any time soon

thisstableground

shoutout to the retired elderly man who saw me crying and punching the wall outside and took me for a cup of tea though. if mental health crises have taught me anything its that older people who have been put through the wringer by life are usually located outside of any medical facility and they are always ready provide you with free food, drink or cigarettes bc that's not the first time it's happened to me

#theyre always like. oh yeah ive been there #and then give a bunch of advice that isnt actually that helpful but its still nice to get

i forgot how much fun it is when you go to the doctor with an incredibly well researched and articulated point and they go. nah here's another random drug with no explanation that in all honesty kind of seems counterintuitive to what you were asking, and no further information on whether you'll be getting an actual proper assessment at any time soon

#day is going bad