pretending to be functional

The Magnus Archives. Other various and sundry fandoms that I am sporadic enough with that I won’t list them here. I read and write fanfic like it gives me sustenance. come scream into the void with me.

[threemargaysinahat]

pinned post

Hello and welcome!

Just a couple of creatures in a hat trying to get by in this world.

I read, I write, I hyperfixate.

TMA, Malevolent, and WHA are my current active obsessions. This is, of course, liable to change, as is my wont. The heart goes where the heart goes.

I'm 21. I don't tag well. View at your own risk.

AO3 is attached.

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

Honestly bizarre that tomatoes get all the flack for “not being a vegetable” because they're technically a fruit when:

A) There are a ton of fruits that get categorised as vegetables. Like this also applies to pumpkins, squashes and cucumbers.

B) The fucking mushrooms are standing there at the back of the crowd in this witch trial, trying to look inconspicuous because they somehow got into the vegetable club with no fucking controversy despite the fact that they're not even plants.

[couldntbedamned]

If you come across anyone who starts off with "Scientists don't want you to know..." you need to understand that they're lying. They're completely full of shit and working a grift.

Because they've never met or spoke with a scientist.

Scientists WANT YOU TO KNOW. Scientists want you to know SO MUCH. Scientists would be THRILLED to teach you EVERYTHING they know in EXPLICIT DETAIL. Scientists LOVE to share information and their findings and their theories. They don't want to hide anything, ever. They are SO HAPPY to share.

[herpsandbirds]

[animals-riding-animals]

toads riding snake

[tamascotchi-deactivated20190101]

they took midnight train goin anywhere

[hroethvitnir]

#minoring in zoology was a mistake because now i know all those toads are trying to have sex with the snake#i have to live with this knowledge and now you do too.#fucking amplexus frogs will try to get with anythinfb that moves#and also anything that doesnt move

[haunted-hideaway]

Oh my.

[askabiologist]

just to verify this is so legit. Frogs and Toads are horny bastards. and will hump anything regardless of their health and safe or general ability to reproduce. Think of really drunk frat guys… like that. 

[lockaccle]

So what do you say, Artie?

[prokopetz]

The popular misconception that vampires than shapeshift arises from the fact that vampirism is caused by a parasite with a complex life cycle involving several intermediate hosts. Rat, bat, and wolf hosts are all necessary for the successful reproduction of the vampiric parasite at various stages. Unconventionally, the parasite's life cycle crosses biological kingdoms, with certain stages obligately parasitising gourd and squash plants, though the effects of vampirism in gourds are not well recognised in most communities, allowing these plants to function as reservoir hosts.

[the-skys-a-social-construct]

obsessed with lenny trying to explain the messed up seance to the hyde family while arthur’s standing next to him like this:

[butchyena]

this is the funniest fucking billboard possible. who the fuck paid for this

[bish0ps]

Remember when you could look things up online. Do you remember how we used to search

[growingdark]

calm downnn you can keep your stupid stone

[nonbinaryjudean]

OCD things that you don't hear about:

episodes of paranoia, delusions, and dissociation

cyclical thoughts/spirals

magical thinking

episodes that can be very similar to psychosis or mania

attributing human emotions to inanimate objects

dermatillomania and trichotillomania

false sensations (like bugs crawling on skin)

paying way too much attention to very small things

physical health issues caused by compulsions

symptoms that are "problematic" (doing things that are considered "wasteful", needing reassurance or validation from others...)

extreme, deep, dreadful fear of things that can't truly be explained

disconnect between emotional and cognitive/logical responses or thoughts

contamination fears

problems with addiction and dopamine regulation

other people trying to force exposure therapy onto you without your consent and it making your anxiety way worse

list making

[monstersovka]

✷ 🍂 ✷

[doomdaysdecays-deactivated20251]

me: if only there was a fruit that looks like an apple but is actually a pear

the baffling papple:

[lesbeid0u]

[prguitarman]

Good morning ✨

[nozaeron]

arthur's taking the knife from hyde's hand, calming his violence down with belief and pacifying gentleness. that's our triple platinum violent dog soother here. 7 seasons of "your anger does not destine you" repeating experience ARE showing

[crowley-stardust]

you are NOT immune to cunty little detective. at some point in your life your brain will be taken over by a fictional detective and there’s nothing you can do about it. it WILL happen to you. you might even end up transgender about it