Oh, Mama, I’m Just Having Fun

• Mutuals-Only | 18+ | Est. 08/25 • Follows back from @milleansxmort!

[thrillxseeking]

Independent, private, & selective Survival AU Daisy Farley from The Vampire Maurice. Combination canon & headcanon-based portrayal with canon-divergence set just before her death. Loved by Ellie & written in affiliation with Sunny’s Maurice. 28. She / Her.

A STUDY IN: the masks we wear to hide our pain, the desire to forget at any cost, addiction & sobriety & relapse, relentlessly grasping for things that no longer exist, the losing and finding of oneself, waking to the realization that you no longer know who you are, and immortality as both blessing and curse.

IMPORTANT LINKS: carrd. memes. opens. wishlist. promo. more info. pinterest. playlist: daisy.

HEAVILY FEATURING: her maker & father • baby brother

BLOG ROLL: @milleansxmort ( Celeste Toussant - Fat Vampire ) • @monsterxmade ( Anya Calwyn - Fandomless / Multifandom OC ) • @royaltyxbound ( Calliope - Fae Princess OC )

[thrillxseeking]

// I know I just put out a Christmas starter call here but I actually think I’m going to put Daisy on a hiatus until at least the end of January. She is still very much in development and I just don’t have the time or energy to put into that right now and it’s stressing me out a bit trying to keep up with her. I’ll try again after the holidays and once I’m settled but for now, I think I’d rather just focus on my primary three. Thank you guys, though, for all your interest, patience, and understanding. <3

[paper-wounds]

[baddogmari]

when you feel like you’re starting to get better and suddenly the impending doom sets in again and you know the cycle is about to repeat

[needxheavenxnow]

Against her will, her face turned a shade of crimson at Daisy’s bold suggestion. She had never really considered such things, partly because she was saving herself for marriage, but mostly because Isabelle didn’t openly have discussions about sex with… well, with anyone, much less herself. Especially not Klaus, as they’d only recently started seeing each other. They had barely even held hands, so it made the situation all the more mortifying for Isabelle.

With a nervous laugh, she gently removed Daisy’s hands away from the sides of her face. "Perhaps you’d like to call him and ask him yourself?" The only reason why Isabelle bothered humoring her again was because she had reached her wit’s end. It felt much like she was dealing with a stubborn, demanding child in a way, though Isabelle couldn’t decide which was worse. Calling Klaus was mildly tempting. It would be nice to have some help, but maybe he wouldn’t know how to handle someone under the influence either.

“I-Maybe you’re right, but I-I’m sorry, I just can’t! I made a vow to wait until marriage, and I won’t break that promise now. It’s very important to me. And do you know what else is important to me? You. I care about you, even if you don’t care about yourself. I wouldn’t want anything bad to happen to you. I really hate seeing you like this. That’s why I’m begging you… Please, drink some water and have something to eat. Please."

[thrillxseeking]

Daisy’s lower lip juts out in a petulant, childish pout. She doesn’t see Isabelle’s denial the way she’s supposed to — as concern for Daisy, as a desire to stay true to herself and her principles. Sober, she would have respected it. But not now.

The look is quick to shift again though, mood labile in the midst of her inebriated state. Now, amusement twinkles in her eyes again. Oh, what Isabelle didn’t know. It’s almost adorable.

“That won’t help,” she says.

Water and human food would affect her none, after all. Her body can’t digest it. The only reason this is working is because she had already gone through two humans so inebriated themselves they were barely conscious. It was the mixture of their blood and the substances they had already absorbed into their own veins that made the high linger more than a few seconds and even then, the effect was lesser.

God, sometimes she really misses Thrill. Sometimes, only in moments like these when she is so desperate for the fix of it, she almost resents her maker for destroying it even if it had been to save her life. Even if no one could have known that Daisy’s addiction isn’t just mental the way all addictions are for other vampires. It’s physical. It’s blood-deep ( deep enough that the echoes of Thrilloglobin can be felt in the blood her human descendants, though she’s still unaware of it ). Those echoes, the essence of the drug, are preserved forever in her unchanging body.

“And I wouldn’t want it to. I’m having fun, Isabelle. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

[thrillxseeking]

// I can’t explain why but this look is just giving peak modern Daisy vibes.

[literaryvein]

L. V., excerpts from a past life

[nixscriptum]

[milleansxmort]

Celeste is love.

Anya is perseverance.

Calliope is passion.

[thrillxseeking]

And Daisy is life.

All of its ups and downs, pains and joys, struggles and moments of blessed ease. All of its innocence and cruelty. All of its contradictions. She is all of it.

[strongsweetmedicine]

“Easy,” he said quietly, glancing over her without staring. “You’ve lost a fair bit of blood.” His voice was calm, not scolding, just stating fact. It was important to be extra sure, in case her balance wavered. When she tried to move past him, he shifted to keep her from stumbling. “You can tell me you’re fine all you like,” he said, gentler now, “but I’ve seen worse nights end that way. Let’s make sure you’re steady before you head anywhere, alright?”

He didn’t wait for her pride to answer, only adjusted his hold enough to take some of her weight, his tone even and warm. “Come on. Just for a minute. Then you can go home.”

@thrillxseeking

[thrillxseeking]

Even she can tell Joshua is concerned about her and maybe in another state of mind, she would have been touched by it, but right now, Daisy only laughs. It’s a high and bubbly sound, the kind of melody that sounds like innocence, once truly so rare only a few people had heard it in full but not anymore. Not as she is now.

“It’s not my blood,” she says. Most of it wasn’t anyways. What little damage her victim had managed to do was inconsequential to the state Daisy had left her in. “My food fought back.”

[thrillxseeking]

What does your blood taste like to a vampire?

( Tagged by: @strongsweetmedicine // Tagging: you! )

fruit punch

your blood tastes like fruit punch, a fruit juice typically mixed with sweeteners and sodas. prominent flavors: sugar, ambiguous fruits, and uncomfortable school dances.

[nightprompts]

&. 𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  various  fluffy  dialogue  prompts  so  soft,  so  sweet,  just  for  you!  )

❛ i just wanted to make sure you’re okay. ❜

❛ there it is, there’s that smile! ❜

❛ you got me flowers? ❜

❛ i’m not afraid of you. ❜

❛ aw, did you miss me? ❜

❛ you’re lucky that you’re cute. ❜

❛ wait, you think i’m cute? ❜

❛ you’re not alone. you never were. ❜

❛ i don’t think i’ve ever seen you smile. ❜

❛ good morning, sleeping beauty. ❜

❛ it’s better with you here. ❜

❛ don’t worry, i’m staying right here. ❜

❛ you’re welcome to stay, if you want. ❜

❛ don’t be a stranger, okay? ❜

❛ i haven’t laughed like this in a long time. ❜

❛ hold still. this might sting a little. ❜

❛ you can hold my hand, if you want. ❜

❛ i knew you would be here. ❜

❛ i just wanted to say thank you for protecting me. ❜

❛ before you do anything, try this and tell me what you think. ❜

❛ wow i really can’t speak, huh? must be because of how pretty you look. ❜

❛ we can order pizza, watch a movie, whatever you want. ❜

❛ what, am i not allowed to look at you? ❜

❛ i’m not giving up on you. ❜

❛ is that my shirt? ❜

❛ this is a good look for you. ❜

❛ pinky promise? ❜

❛ c’mere, you. ❜

❛ honey, i’m home! ❜

❛ you remembered? ❜

❛ you’re my family too. ❜

❛ let’s go somewhere, just you and me. ❜

❛ i’m here for you. don’t forget that. ❜

❛ you’re the only thing that matters. ❜

❛ was that your first kiss? ❜

❛ i was worried something happened to you. ❜

❛ your heart is beating so fast right now. ❜

❛ relationships are built on trust, and i trust you. ❜

❛ you always see the good in people. even me. ❜

❛ do you think the moon is jealous of how pretty you are? ❜

❛ nope, puppy dog eyes aren’t going to work this time! ❜

❛ thanks to you, i know what it means to love again. ❜

❛ how about a kiss before i go? ❜

❛ i’m just glad you’re okay. ❜

❛ here we are, home sweet home. ❜

❛ thanks for being here with me. ❜

❛ seeing you happy is all that matters. ❜

❛ keep it. it looks better on you. ❜

❛ i couldn’t stop missing you if i tried. ❜

❛ you feel like home to me. ❜

[quad4xel]

HE SIMPLY NODS. alexei doesn't know how it feels to be turned. he was already thirty - one by the time daisy was born, four years post - european exploration. he'd spent every year, from 1918 to 1925, exploring as much of europe as he could. france, poland, estonia, ukraine, every single country he could get to. he would've continued travelling if he hadn't gotten the distinct feeling that a hunter had been following him. no, he had no definitive proof, but he'd felt eyes on his back, felt watched. after that exploration, alexei had spent the next two decades as a homebody, never left the house for anything. he had staff get him blood, cigarettes, alcohol, anything he'd needed.

❝ in russia, we would say things like 'neither down nor feather,' which essentially meant 'good luck' and 'to make an elephant out of a fly,' which meant to make a big deal of nothing. i was told that one quite a bit. that i was dramatic and making a big deal of something small. as if it was my fault that i was worried a hunter was following me. ❞

A SHRUG. ❝ that is what it is called, the google. i do not understand why people think it is so funny when i say that. ❞ that's just how alexei talks. it's how other russians he's met in america that speak english refer to things. it still confuses him when people laugh after he comments 'the instagram' on things. ❝ it is a thing the children find interesting, apparently. i do not understand it. how is a head in a toilet entertaining ?? the children these days are entertained by very odd things. i have been referred to as 'skibidi' and have been told that i have 'rizz,' which apparently means charisma. or that i am 'eating.' i was told that means i am 'slay,' but i had to use the google to learn what that means. it means that i am doing well or that i look very good. and i agree. i am doing well and look very good. ❞

[thrillxseeking]

Daisy is lucky in that one regard, she supposes.

She, unlike most of vampire-kind, had never had any dealings with hunters. America is different from Europe in a lot of ways and vampire culture here is one of them. They are all so young here. Traveling across the ocean was hard back then with no planes to speed to journey and the threat of the sun making travel by boat an uncomfortable and dangerous endeavor. Her vampire parents were from Europe — France, specifically — and she knew that they had come to America only three years or so before Maurice had turned her. She knew they had risked the weeks on the ocean — Maurice three times, actually — and had done it successfully by stowing away in a crate in the cargo hold. The vampires who traveled to America then were few in comparison to the entirety of the European population, and those made here were only a few hundred years at most. It meant vampire hunters were few and far between here too, the American Vampire Nation established after the widespread belief in monsters began to wane, no ancient vampire-hunting sects established. Of course, there were some that expanded here. But not like there was in Europe and in the millennia before her.

Daisy flashes a rare smile ( rare when she’s sober anyways ) as his explanations shift into his usual brand of self-confidence and self-praise, a giggle sounding along. His arrogance doesn’t irritate her like it might others. It amuses her. It astounds her. It contrasts her own cycles between depressive self-hatred and quiet acceptance of who she is.

“They’re very silly. But children are supposed to be. We may not understand it but they’re happy and I’m glad for that.”

[roomsick]

[theresastargirl]

“No, of course. They keep assuring me of that. Celeste, especially, she… well, once we got over the initial awkwardness, or I did, we… she’s assured me that I would have been gone long before this.”

Her gaze lifts to the other, raising an eyebrow. “What, with the glamour? Maurice would have had to do that, and I dunno if he would. I mean, if he had to, sure, but I still. I think I’ve got all my memories in tact so far.” A pause. “Can you glamour? I would imagine so, but like… what’s it like? Between that and turning into bats, which I was informed isn’t true in the lore, that seems like the cool abilities vampires have.”

Perhaps she was poking where she shouldn’t be again, but Ophelia was still far too curious about this world not to. “Sorry, I… I ask too many questions, I know I do. I’m working on not but it’s hard sometimes, you know? Because what if I do lose all this? I want to know as much as I can before hand. Not that it would matter then, but just for the time being, I want to learn it all.”

[thrillxseeking]

“You’re okay. I understand,” she says. “I can glamour. All vampires can glamour, some are just better at it than others.”

And Daisy is particularly good at it. The Thrill she had been born in, that had been immortalized as echoes of its addictive power in her blood, had made her unprecedentedly strong in multiple areas. Her strength and speed remained average, but her blood ties were terribly loud, even capable of moving through Maurice and to his other progeny with a natural ease, and her glamour had been flawless since day one. She hadn’t needed even a single lesson. The boosts Thrill gave other vampires when they imbibed were simply part of her. She just lacked the high — the bloodlust that had once had her tearing through human bodies to get at their blood and the inebriating forces flooding their veins, and the physical lust that had her taking anyone and everyone she could get her hands on; whenever, wherever, and however she could get them.

“It’s like…a connection. Not the kind of connection blood ties give us to our vampire families. More like…by looking into their eyes, you’re delving too deep into the core of their souls, if you believe in that kind of thing. The soul too, not the mind or body because you don’t really control their thoughts or movements. You just…say things to their soul and if you’re good enough, clear enough, convincing enough, they suddenly want to do it.”

She shrugs at the end of her sentence as if it’s no big deal, but suddenly she’s avoiding Phee’s gaze more than before and her fingernails dig deeper into her palm. She’s in control of herself and she knows it, but it’s been harder to resist lately as things seem to shift and spiral around her. As she finds herself wanting to run and hide and forget again. As she finds herself so desperately wanting for the elation Thrill once brought her — a feeling so much like happiness she still confuses the two — though any human substitute never quite reached the same level of it no matter how much she took or how often. Her tongue glides over her lip as the taste rises to the surface of her tongue. She forces a smile, forces the thoughts from her mind, forces her gaze to rise as if to make a point.

“But you shouldn’t be scared. No one here will glamour you to do anything you don’t want to do. Not unless someone absolutely has to. For your safety and all. And you’re safe now so it’s nothing to worry about. I shouldn’t have mentioned it. I didn’t want to worry you further.”

[hollowprompts]

` * 𝐧𝐨𝐧-𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 : 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘴. 𝘯𝘰 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩. 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘥 (+ 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦) 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘦.

𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐭 -

01. avoids eye contact or looking at the floor. 02. wringing hands together in silence. 03. fidgeting with the hem of their shirt, unable to stay still. 04. looking at receiver in long silence before looking away. 05. silently leaves a folded note on the table in front of the other. 06. touches the others arm but pulls back out of guilt.

𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 -

01. slams fist onto a table without saying a word. 02. exhaling sharply through their nose and clenching their jaw. 03. throws an object across the room. 04. crossing their arms tightly, digging fingers into their own skin. 05. pacing the room with heavy steps. 06. glares at the other with a clenched fist.

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 -

01. gently pushing stray hair behind the others ear. 02. resting their forehead against the others. 03. cups the others face with both hands. 04. pressing a kiss to the others forehead in silence. 05. lingering touches against the others face. 06. wraps their arms around the other from behind and rests their head on the others shoulder.

𝐬𝐚𝐝𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 -

01. wiping their eyes before someone can notice. 02. pressing their face into a pillow to muffle sobs. 03. pulls the other into a desperate hug and wont let go. 04. silently reaching for the others hand, needing comfort. 05. walks into the room with red-rimmed eyes and no words.

𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐬 -

01. spins the other around without warning in a hug. 02. links arms with the other and tugs them along happily. 03. provides the other with a handmade gift. 04. tackles the other in a sudden and joyful hug. 05. kisses the others cheek unexpectedly and grins.

𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫 -

01. backing away slowly and looking for exits. 02. hiding behind the other and peeking around. 03. flinches at sudden movement from the other. 04. presses their back against the wall with eyes darting around the room. 05. jumps at a noise and instinctively grabs the others hand.

𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠

01. tucks a blanket gently around the other person's shoulders. 02. applies a bandage with slow and deliberate care. 03. brings them food and water and watches to ensure they eat. 04. runs fingers through their hair in efforts to soothe. 05. rubs soothing circles on the others back while they cry. 06. stays silently by the others side in support without saying a word.

𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠

01. raises a hand but hesitates. 02. grips the others arm a bit too tightly. 03. pushes the other away with more force than necessary. 04. turns their back on the other to begin walking away without a word. 05. rips a shared photo in half without a word. 06. steps in closely with cold and narrowed eyes.

[thrillxseeking]

// Though there was no word for it when she was growing up — or at least not one that didn’t imply insanity and could very possibly get a woman institutionalized and / or lobotomized — Daisy would be diagnosed with clinical depression today and has been affected by it since she was human with the onset probably somewhere in her early teens as she became more and more aware of her own naturally odd disposition as well as her father’s gambling addiction, their resulting financial instability, and the effect it all had on her mother. It most likely gradually increased in severity, hitting peaks before, during, and after her pregnancy; after her father disappearance and presumed murder; and as she adjusted to the fact that she technically died.

Thrilloglobin did change Daisy, it did turn her into something so stereotypically vampire as to be downright monstrous in her unabashed indulgences and lack of regard for human life, but Daisy was also broken from the start and the combination of effects from both Thrill and the vampire agent amplified that brokenness. Even Maurice has to admit at some point that it wasn’t all Thrill that made Daisy this way, that some of it was her.

And it only gets worse after the mafia kills her mother and brother only weeks after her losing her father and days after she’s turned, just as the Thrill she’d been born in is finally making its way out of her system. On top of grieving her family, she blames herself for drinking them to the brink of death that first night, to trying to turn them with human blood still in her veins and damaging them beyond repair in the process, and finally, for making them such easy targets when the mafia came. That’s when the true addiction begins, when she starts to long for the effects of the vampire drug. It’s when she delves into a party scene she may never had joined in life, going on days-long benders of Thrill ( and whatever else she added to it by drinking the blood of inebriated humans ), dancing, and sex, sleeping only when she passed out and waking just to begin again. It’s when she begins to truly self-harm in the absence of those effects, breaking her own bones just to watch them heal and repeat the process over and over again. Anything to numb the pain. Anything to ease the guilt. Anything to forget, even just for a little while.

Daisy doesn’t get a chance to heal from it all in canon, dying just after Maurice put an end to the Thrill trade, but in my head, if she were to survive, the moment he does that marks the beginning of a long journey of coming to terms with it and eventually closing those wounds. The thought of it all will always hurt, and she will always struggle with periods of depression and the desperate want for Thrill, the echoes of it forever in her blood, but with the true high of Thrill no longer available to her and with the help of Maurice and Celeste, she’s capable of going longer and longer without falling into the ruts of her cycles of self-destruction and the subsequent desperate attempts to get her Thrill fix by human means.

Daisy does want to be better. Especially after witnessing the lengths Maurice would go to in order to keep her safe, and feeling the affection he and Celeste have for her through their blood-ties.

If it was just a mental thing for her the way it is with other vampires, she might have been capable of staying clean without the intermittent relapses she experiences, but it’s not. She was born in Thrill and there’s a physical need for it that will never leave her, that she has to learn to resist even in her lowest moments. It’s so much harder than anyone knows. Thrill was such an all-consuming drug and her addiction to it was so intense that the echoes of it passed through Daisy’s latent blood-ties nearly a century later canonically overwhelms both Maurice and Celeste at different points of the series, but she’s trying. She’s steadily getting better at catching herself, at putting a stop to it, at asking for the help she needs to recover from it.

In the current time of this blog, in the wake of the Ring of Fire incident, she’s really struggling, barely holding herself back, and she could go either way depending on thread-specific influences and events, but the Daisy she becomes in those low moments and inevitable relapses scares her and only increases those feelings of guilt and self-hatred in the long run, so she keeps trying and she won’t truly stop trying for long, no matter how bad she becomes in the interims.