Into the Depths of a Messy Brain

Title says it all 

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Thoughts

Every single time I miss you

I end up asking myself

a thousand questions for justification.

Is it just loneliness or do you miss him?

What is it that you miss?

The conversations, the care, the love

Because what else do you know about him?

Nothing.

The thoughts always seem to end at one question

Does he ever think of me the same way?

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Life

It's exactly what I wanted but why does it seem confusing when it comes by?

Is it human to feel so lost every time a decision comes by? Or is it weakness that crumbles me to the ground?

I know I can do it but somehow I do not seem to escape the shadow of self-doubt.

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Laments

I am amazed by how often you pop into my thoughts.

When I think that maybe I have gotten rid of you, you appear just like that. To show me that I was not alone. That you felt the same in certain ways.

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Laments

When the dust cleared, my eyes looked to you

Even when I knew that you wouldn't be here

because I pushed you away.

Although I can still justify the decision,

I miss the shoulder to cry on

and the effort to make me smile.

But those are not reasons enough

to keep your big heart confined in my hands.

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Laments

Sometimes I can feel my mind losing control. I can feel the strings going off my hands and then I desperately try to get a hold of them.

I am not made for this life. I am stuck here with no end in sight.

I don't understand why she can't see it or care about it.

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

The Dark part of the Tunnel

And when I thought it was almost over,

I saw the road elongate right before my eyes,

With no end in sight.

My mind is not my ally anymore.

She keeps asking,

Can't we just end this now?

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Overwhelmed

Stretched and Pulled, in every direction

I try to come up for air

But I am trapped just below the surface.

I am hanging on to a strand of sanity,

hoping to come out the other end

with a shred of happiness and love.

And maybe get this weight off my heart.

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight Just a touch of the fire burnin' so bright No, I don't want to mess this thing up I don't want to push too far Just a shot in the dark that you just might Be the one I've been waitin' for my whole life

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Laments

I keep hoping it's me.

When you say you can't get over it. When you say you can't move on. I hope it's me.

Because I can't either.

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

If it's not obvious enough, I have a thing for his hands.

Neelavelicham (2023)

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

So, it's over. The project has come to a close. We're back exactly where we started - Eric, me, the cat, slightly worse for wear, sitting in the outer boroughs, eating

So, thanks everybody! And guess what?

Bon Appetit!

The last of the Julie and Julia food scenes. This was truly a fun experience. Until next time :)

Dish above :

Pate De Canard En Croute [Boned Stuffed Duck Baked in a Pastry Crust]

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

It’s Judith Jones, the editor who’s responsible for getting Julia’s cookbook published way back when. The woman who recognized history in an onionskin manuscript. 

Boeuf Bourguignon which was the first dish she cooked upon reading Mastering the Art of French Cooking for the first time.    

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Laments

I am sorry for hurting you. 

Maybe you were my one chance at getting the love I always dreamt of. Maybe we would have been perfect. Maybe it could all have worked out. 

It was just not the time. At least that’s what I say to myself. 

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Okay, this is slightly embarrassing but I don’t have a clue as to what these dishes are. 

I tried some researching but couldn’t find anything conclusive. Rather than spread false information, I think I’ll leave to people who might have an idea about it. Please do let me know if you know these dishes. 

Other than that, bon appetit! 

P.S - I believe this is one of the sweetest moments during the Julie Powell-Eric Powell relationship. 

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

A preview of Boning a duck.  

This scene beautifully depicts the relationship between Julia and Paul Child. The shot of Julia from the perspective of Paul is delightful. Her positive and cheerful disposition is infectious.

More detailed shots of boning a duck coming up in the future posts.   

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

Hot Chocolate from Kaapi & Co., MG Road, Kochi

Highly disappointing hot chocolate. They used to have this Hot Chocolate which was a rich blend of cocoa. But it has been reduced to a menial version of the original. Would not recommend it at all.     

[through-the-clouds-and-away]

And we are BACK!!

The Chapter of Boeuf Bourguignon with a cameo by Raspberry Bavarian Cream

I fell in love with the dish on first sight. Boeuf Bourguignon is the most beautiful dish of the entire movie. Something about the preparation and Julie’s style of cooking strikes the scene. 

To be honest, even the burnt version of the dish looks amazing to me.