Based on this wonderful request from my baby girl @tomitsulikeslemons !!!! DADDY SHINJI (literally)
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Somehow, you knew there was new life growing inside of you. A woman's intuition, you supposed, but the positive test result in front of you confirmed it.
You were pregnant with your husband, Shinji Hirako's child.
At this verified discovery, a flurry of emotions hit you at once, and you began to sob. Overwhelmed, you sank to your knees in the bathroom as you tried to comprehend what this meant, your world flipped upside down without the need for your husband's zanpakuto. You were ready and you were not, excited and terrified, confident and insecure. One moment you were smiling, crying happily and laughing through your tears, and the next your brows were furrowing together, worry tugging at your heart that what if you weren't a good mother? What was going to happen to you now that you were going to be responsible for another human? Were you a bad person for thinking these things? No, you were happy. So, so happy. Putting your hand on your belly, you hadn't met your child yet, and you already had so much love for them, more love than you had for anything or anyone else in this world.
And speaking of love, Shinji, you breathed, your silly Shinji, your other half, the father of your child, what would he think?
You had talked about having children with him, so the concept wasn't entirely foreign, but you weren't exactly trying per se. He never disapproved of the idea, but this was sure to be overwhelming for him too. How would he take this?
He'd been so busy as a Captain now, you hadn't even got around to telling him that night. Or the next. It wasn't until the third night that the truth became too heavy for you to carry on your own.
He was being stupid and oblivious, too busy thinking with his dick and trying to get you out of your clothes. The kind of behavior that got you in this situation in the first place, he initially didn't notice your anxious mannerisms.
But your dearest wasn't a complete moron as so many thought of him. Observant, sensitive, and intuitive, when he snaked his arms around you from behind, you felt him still.
"Wait a minute," he whispered before spinning you around to face him, pressing a hand into your chest to confirm his suspicions. "You're shaking, and your heart's racing. Sweetheart?"
The jig was up. You tried to smile, but it came out crooked and frightened. It only made his face further contort with worry.
"I have something to tell you," you confessed timidly.
Shinji frowned deeply and released you. "Oh, shit. Please don't divorce me."
You couldn't help but scoff at him. "You dork! I'm not going anywhere!" He always had a way of making you laugh when you needed it most, but you couldn't keep putting this off. You exhaled shakily, "actually, it's quite the opposite..."
The poor, confused bastard. He raised an eyebrow at you, not quite following. "The opposite? The opposite..." He narrowed his eyes in thought.
"Shinji." Exasperated, you grabbed the hand he dropped from your heart, splaying his fingers over your stomach. "I'm pregnant."
His narrowed eyes shot open, brightening at your words. He looked at your tummy, as if he'd already find a bulge there, then back up at you again, then back down, then back up. He was being so quiet, your man who normally never shut up, it unnerved you. You were raising your eyebrows at him expectantly, needing him to say something, anything.
Then he was kneeling before you, putting both of his hands on your stomach, in disbelief that his child, his, was growing somewhere in there. "No way," he breathed, smoothing his palms over the surface of your torso. "You're pregnant? Really?" He looked up from where he knelt, his sharp features gone soft.
"Mhm." You nodded, smiling gently, his softness contagious.
Shinji looked at your belly again, gasping in disbelief, processing your words. His silence again worried you, made you reach for his hair and tangle your fingers through it, hoping to get his attention.
He shot up from where he knelt, startling you, scooping you into his arms and spinning you around in a flash, whooping and hollering maniacally. He placed you back on your feet to hug you and deliver sloppy, innocent smooches all over your face, smothering you.
He pulled back, panting, holding you by your shoulders. "I knew I was a sharp shooter, but this - this!" He shook you, laughing. "Holy shit! I'm gonna be a dad! I'm really gonna be a dad!" He chanted, grinning wide. "And you!" His voice broke off as he curled a hand around your jaw, looking utterly soft and kissable again. "Oh, my little mommy! My sweet baby's havin' a baby! My baby's gonna be a mommy!"
Emotion exploded almost painfully in your chest as you were reminded of that fact for a second time. You were going to be a mother, and him a father. The father of your child. The statement didn't seem true, but alas, it was. His excitement made tears spring from your eyes all over again. Your lip wobbled but strained into a smile as you joined in his laughter. He understood the weight of your emotions, pulling you into his chest in a suffocating embrace to sob it out. He rubbed your back and thought aloud over and over again, "I'm gonna be a dad. We're gonna be parents."
You stayed in his arms for a long time, standing there, and then in bed, relishing in the comfort and safety you felt when you were with him. You were grateful your child would grow up to experience the same, to be loved and protected by someone so special. When you were finally calmed down enough, he had something else to say.
"I'm gonna be such a dilf."
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The seasons were different, more meaningful, as your baby grew through each of them. The rest of the autumn and holiday season was special now that there was an impending addition to your family. As the leaves fell and the weather changed, you were reminded of the change happening within you. You frequently made and shared cozy, nourishing meals and treats with Shinji, spent more time cuddled up with him rubbing your belly and whispering sweet nothings in your ear as the evenings got darker and colder. Quality time spent with him was more frequent, slower, more deliberate.
At holiday festivals with your friends, you and Shinji had to find ways to cover the fact that you weren't throwing back drinks as you normally would, being that the pregnancy was still only in the beginning stages and you had yet to break the news to them. You were never alone, your husband always at your side, careful, calculating, safeguarding.
"Oh, she's not feeling well tonight," he'd speak for you, protectively slinging an arm around your shoulder and tugging you into his side, glaring at the person prodding you.
On the occasion that he let you respond, you'd save yourself with something as simple and uncomfortable as "ah, I've been putting on some pounds recently, and I'm trying to cut back on the extra calories," pretending that you were ashamed of your growing stomach when really you were elated.
"Yeah, you are looking a little more filled out these days," Soi Fon replied impassively when you told her this, making your jaw drop despite the fact that you were mostly lying.
"What the hell does that mean?" You had to pull Shinji back from getting into an argument with her, nervously laughing it off and excusing her blunt nature.
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Then came the harsh winter, and you didn't mind so much being stuck indoors this year. You enjoyed staying at home with your little bun in the oven, taking long, warm baths, lighting candles, asking Shinji to bring you home whatever you were craving that day. You were actually starting to fill out now, and so you shared the news with a few close compatriots in the new year.
"Oh, congratulations!" Orihime beamed, hugging you, holding your hand, and talking your ear off about motherhood, being that she already had a little boy with Ichigo.
"Yeah, congrats." Ichigo smiled in agreement, proudly slapping Shinji on the back. "Little scary that Hirako's gonna be a dad, but congrats!"
"HEY!" Your husband frowned.
Rukia asked you about the gender as she watched her own little girl playing with Renji, if you had a preference for a boy or girl. You explained that you and Shinji agreed to let the gender be a surprise, coming up with a variety of names should your child be a boy or girl. You'd both be happy no matter who your child turned out to be, gracious that you were even blessed enough to have a child at all, or so Shinji told you. For every boy name he came up with, there were 3 more girl names. You never nagged him about it, but you had the inkling he wanted to be a girl dad.
Now that people were starting to find out, he was increasingly going all "dad mode," as he called it, not caring who was around to witness it. Shinji always had a bit of a protective streak, but now...you couldn't so much as step outside without him rushing to your side, holding your hand or arm to help you along.
"You could slip on ice!" He'd reason.
"My love, it's nearly fifty degrees out today. There's no ice."
You couldn't blame his overprotective behavior much. You were going through a lot of behavioral changes as well, much worse than anything he was.
For one, you had become incredibly needy for him. It was odd. You'd thought you wouldn't want to be touched being that you were swelling up, but on the contrary, you were constantly in heat, begging for him to satisfy you no matter the place or time.
"You sure you want this? What if I accidentally poke junior?" He'd grin and tease you.
"You're big, but you're not that big, Shinji. Just fuck me already."
"Ouch. So impatient, momma," he tsked. "But I guess I've got to take care of my wife, don't I?"
And for another thing, you were a rollercoaster of uncontrollable emotions, especially the more your pregnancy progressed. You were constantly snapping over the smallest of irritants or bursting into tears over minor inconveniences, like the day Shinji brought you a tray of sushi in an attempt to cheer you up after you were already having a particularly difficult day.
"You idiot! I can't have sushi!" You shouted at him, heated with fury over such a small matter and with the effort it took to fight off tears.
"Ah, forgot about that." Shinji scratched the back of his neck sheepishly, dumbly.
It made you explode, a cascade of waterworks streaming down your cheeks. Another thing that had changed was how much softer he was with you, if it was even possible for him to get any more so, despite how bitchy you had been. So then you were crying because of your hot-temper, hurt curling around and squeezing your heart at the helpless way he looked when you yelled at him.
"I'm being so mean to you! I'm so sorry! I'm a horrible wife!"
"What?! No!" He'd pet your hair and kiss your tears away. "If anything, I deserved it. I am an idiot for getting you sushi. Wasn't thinkin', doll. I'm sorry."
Shinji had learned a lot of patience through the months, and it made him a better man in every aspect of his life, not just at home. He was never the most tightly-wound, but he had mellowed out considerably as he took care of you and his unborn child each day, growing into a gentle guardian before you had even given birth.
"He's been so calm lately," Momo informed you over lunch one day. "Training has been a lot less strenuous. Everyone on the squad keeps joking that they hope you stay pregnant forever," she giggled.
"Glad I could be of help," you giggled along with her.
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When the spring came, you were much bigger, getting ready to blossom just as the season was. As it got warmer and sunnier, Shinji made a show of shading you wherever you went, protecting your sensitive skin from the sun, and on those stormy days, he stayed inside with you, making you comfort food and falling asleep with his head in your lap as you read aloud or listened to music, introducing your child to the art you loved so much.
The fickle weather reminded you of your inner world, the way one day you'd wake up sunny, full of joy and love and readiness to meet your baby, and the next, stormy, full of trepidation and worry and unpreparedness, fretting constantly over the questions you had been asking yourself since day one: Will I be a good mother? Will I be able to handle this? Am I a bad person for being so afraid? For feeling so unprepared? Should I be doing more?
Shinji was always there to listen and coax you out of the storm, massaging your sore back as the rain fell outside, he'd confess his own worries.
"I feel the same way," he'd say. "Some days, I feel on top of the world, like I can do anything, and fatherhood won't be any different, but other days, not so much. I'm anxious about being a good father too.
"But we're in this together." He placed his hands over your stomach in the shape of a heart. "And I know you'll be a great mother, so why shouldn't I be a great father too?"
"You will be a great father. You already are," you assured him sincerely.
Your baby stirred inside as if to say, "yes, he is! Yes you are!"
"OH, OH! SHE KICKED! SHE KICKED!" Shinji shrieked, feeling around in hopes of catching another flurry of movement.
"She?!" You laughed excitedly.
"Or he. I don't know, it just slipped out." He chuckled abashedly.
You smiled knowingly to yourself. "Maybe she's excited about hearing her daddy talk so sweet."
"Yeah, maybe." He smiled.
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Now came summer, and you were about to pop. It was as if an eternity passed and simultaneously, no time passed at all. You were changed and you weren't. You remembered the day you found out like yesterday, feeling almost exactly the way you did that day, but more matured. One thing was for sure, no matter how scared you were, you were ready. You'd never felt more ready for anything in your life, bursting with love and impatience, needing to meet your child, whoever they were, whoever they'd become.
Shinji felt the same way, and he had become equal parts amusing and annoying as you approached your due date.
"You think today's the day?" "How you feelin'? How's our girl...or boy?" "What was that?! Are you having contractions?!"
You laughed at him. "No, I just stubbed my toe."
You surprised yourself with how calm you were even though you were soon to be ripped open. Sitting outside under an umbrella next to Shinji, you were sucking on a popsicle, enjoying the hot day when there was a faint cramping sensation in your abdomen, so light, you hardly noticed and ignored it.
But then it was there again several minutes later, a little more noticeable this time. You straightened in your seat, which caught Shinji's attention, always on high alert.
"What is it?" He asked urgently, staring at your large, round stomach.
"Just a little cramping." You forced a smile.
He gave you a pointed look.
"I don't think we should panic yet. My body's doing funny things all the time." You waved a hand dismissively. "And I haven't finished my popsicle."
It was barely a moment later, Shinji hadn't even a chance to retort, that you were straightening again, gasping as pain shot up your back, making you drop your popsicle.
Your husband shot to his feet. "We're going," he demanded, pulling you up to stand. "Better safe than sorry."
The last thing you saw before being ushered away was your popsicle melting against the concrete, leaving a red stain. And it was a good thing, that he was permanently in dad mode, stealing you away from your quiet day and your treat, because you were indeed going into labor.
The long hours that followed were a fast-paced blur. The peaceful summer day was suddenly bursting with feeling and noise, the cold air conditioning inside the hospital fighting against your sweaty skin, strange sensations and haziness. You could hardly process what was going on, blinded with pain, the only person who grounded you was Shinji, your rock. He sounded distant, but he reminded you over and over again that he wasn't.
"It'll be okay, sweetheart, I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."
All the pain, the damage inflicted on your body, the blood, sweat, and tears, it was all worth it the moment your baby came out, and your life had finally changed for the better, a love like you had never felt before truly coming to fruition as reality shifted in front of you. You'd do it all again. You'd take this feeling, this unconditional love, and bottle it up to carry with you forever if you could.
"It's a boy!" The doctor cheered.
When you finally got to hold your baby boy, nothing else mattered. The entire world was in your hands, so fragile and so precious that it made you sob uncontrollably in your exhausted and delirious state, cooing to him as he cried, talking to him and telling him how beautiful he was, how much you loved him.
It was extremely rare that Shinji ever cried, and now, there were silent tears streaming down his face, in shock that he played a part in creating this beautiful, little boy. Like you, he knew this was the epitome of love in the flesh before you. You both knew the moment you saw him, you'd do anything for him.
Shinji, who didn't get to have his baby girl (yet), was so in awe of his little guy. He held him with a tenderness and reverence unlike anything you'd seen, crawling into the hospital bed with you to cuddle up as a real family. He took care of you, softly as usual, as you came back to health, and he cherished every little moment of this newborn stage, chattering nonstop to the nurses, the doctor, to you, to friends, to family, anyone who would listen about his son, his son!
"I'm in love," he confessed as he held the tiny boy at home for the first time.
"So am I."
Your son started to bob his head against Shinji's chest, looking to be fed.
Your husband passed him over to you with a smug grin. "Oh yeah, he's a ladies man for sure. Just like his daddy." He winked.
Motherhood was everything you imagined and somehow everything you hadn't all at once. Your son had challenged you, changed you, shaped you in ways you couldn't explain. You were constantly tired yet always finding it in you to go, go, go, constantly stressing but somehow relaxed as ever, knowing this was exactly where you were always meant to be.
And Shinji, he was a fantastic, eccentric, loving father, as you had no doubt he would be. Hearing him playing with your little boy and the sounds of your baby's laughter quickly became your favorite sound in the whole wide world. Your heart swelled each time you saw Shinji twirling him in the air or blowing raspberries into his chubby belly. He was a new man, matured, with quiet strength and so much affection to give, one you were so deeply in love with it was incomprehensible.
He had become great around children generally, not just your son. On play dates with the little Kurosaki and Abarai toddlers, the children would chase your husband and pull his hair and roar with laughter at his quick wit and goofy antics. You rested easy knowing your son would grow to live a vibrant life with lots of love and laughter, never a dull moment with Shinji's playful nature.
You'd never been happier, and you were grateful for every day, every moment, even those filled with stress and struggle and challenge. You continued to grow and raise your son, both happy and sad at how beautiful it was to witness but how fast it happened. Shinji bought him a toy sword and you imagined him years and years from now, with a zanpakuto of his own, getting into dangerous battles, and you already fretted over your baby boy. He'd get taller and stronger, but he'd be your baby forever.
You mourned the loss of previous baby stages as he hit each new milestone, consuming food besides milk, starting to babble, walking, talking, learning new things and amazing you with how smart he was. It was bittersweet, but it wouldn't be the last time you got to experience it as you witnessed that positive test result for the second time.
"Ready to do it again?" You asked your husband with a grin, so much changed already from the last time you told him you were pregnant, shown in the very way you revealed this to him.
"Of course I am, mommy!" Shinji lifted your son in the air. "Of course we are!" Your little boy giggled and cheered, though he didn't know yet what he was cheering for. "Though I do have a request for how to do things differently this time round..."
"And what is that?" You giggled.
"When we can, we find out the gender." He raised his eyebrows hopefully.
"You still want a girl, don't you?" You came forward, kissing your son on the cheek.
"I love my mini me so much obviously," Shinji nuzzled him affectionately, "but yeah. I do."
"Then a girl we'll have." You kissed your husband.
And you did.
