trying on a metaphor
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AnasAbdin

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occasionally subtle

@theartofmadeline
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if i look back, i am lost
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
KIROKAZE
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Janaina Medeiros

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@tonetic
I like the night, I have clearer ideas in the dark.
Serge Gainsbourg (via quotemadness)
Girls like her were born in a storm. They have lightning in their souls. Thunder in their hearts. And chaos in their bones.
Nikita Gill (via quotemadness)
Chicken soup for the hole
Douching with chicken soup
Please do not douche with chicken soup
However much you love somebody, you should always keep a part of yourself to yourself. Never give it all. You can never be yourself otherwise.
Aidan Chambers (via quotemadness)
I’m not confused. I’m just well mixed.
Robert Frost (via quotemadness)
So this post is really long, but because there are so many people out there struggling with negativity and anxiety and depression like I do, I wanted to share this.
Positive thinking really will change your life.
Now most people will tell you things like "oh just think positive and everything will be perfect!" Or "Positivity will fix everything!" At which point we groan or sigh or roll our eyes, or even all three. But that's not really how it works.
So lemme explain the truth of what positive thinking means and is.
Positive thinking isn't a fix all for your life. It won't make all your problems go away, it won't suddenly make everything perfect. Cuz life isn't perfect. You will always have problems. And it can't fix all the physical stuff either. It also won't make your anxiety and depression go away. I WON my fight with negative thoughts and I still have both anxiety and depression. But I learned how to manage them better and recognize which thoughts were real and which were ones from my anxiety and depression. And I learned how to stop letting them completely rule my life.
What positive thinking WILL do is help you manage your depression and anxiety by helping you learn how to combat the negative thoughts and feelings with logic and positivity, and how to recognize the difference between your true thoughts and feelings, and the false or exaggerated ones fed to you by your anxiety and depression. It will help make the effects of those things less. It will help you by you not having to constantly fight your own mind just to feel things without the added burden. You will learn how to cope with things better and just manage your life better in general.
Positive thinking is something you have to learn, or in some cases, re-learn. It's recognizing that you are thinking/saying something bad about yourself or something negative, recognizing that it's a lie, and pausing for a moment to combat it. Something like "Ugh I'm so stupid" gets corrected to "I make mistakes but that's okay because I will learn from them" or "I'm ugly" can be corrected to "I might not be my type but other people might find me attractive." It can start with EVERY time you have a negative thought you mentally tell yourself "No. That's not true." or "That thought was a complete lie." Sometimes it may help to say it out loud. It's a fight and a really big mental struggle to change a negative way of thinking when you've been stuck in the habit for a long time. It may take MONTHS of CONSTANT effort for you to notice a change. It will be exhausting, and sometimes you will wonder if it's worth it because it is so tiring to constantly correct and fight your mind.
So.. why is it worth it? First let's talk about negativity itself. Negativity becomes a habit, and one that can be VERY hard to break. But once it is a habit, often you have trouble even realizing that you're doing it, or that it's as bad as it is. Negativity can become familiar. It can feel like it's the only reality, or like there was never life before it. Negativity is in many ways, an addiction just like drugs or alcohol, except it's a purely mental addiction. And like many addictions, it tricks your brain into believing that it NEEDS to feel that way. That there is no existence outside of it. Often it will draw on negative past experiences to reinforce the lies. It will convince you to surround yourself with people who feed it and blind you to the fact they are feeding the lies. It can be very convincing. When you try to break the habit, that addiction will try everything it can to convince you to give up and to stop fighting. It will try and convince you that you can never win. But it's not true. And like most addictions, it can be broken, and NEEDS to be broken for you to have the best possible quality of life.
And the truth is, negative thinking doesn't just affect you and your life. The people around you who love and care for you end up suffering because seeing you hate and doubt yourself hurts them. You end up belittling their feelings and emotions about you and, most times, unintentionally tell them that they don't matter. And you can seriously hurt those you love because of it without even meaning to. Especially when they want to help but can't, or because you don't know how to let them. So changing your thinking, putting in that effort, and truly trying to correct your negative mind helps improve the lives of everyone around you.
And as far as what it will do for you? What makes it worth it for YOU? All those times you have wished, dreamed and imagined what life would be like if you didn't have to constantly fight your own mind? All the times you wished you could just respond to things in life normally without all the extra suffering that your anxiety and depression tacks onto it? That you wished you could just be "normal". Positive thinking can help make that a reality. It seems like a fairy tale that a world like that where you don't just exist could be real. But it really can be better.
But it really does take work. You have to REALLY put in some MAJOR MAJOR effort. And you have to do it CONSTANTLY. And.. Even if you change your way of thinking, you will still struggle, still suffer, still have to fight and claw your way through life. But it will make that struggle easier. It will make the fight easier. Cuz let's be honest. A fight is much more easily won when you're not fighting yourself at the same time.
I say these things as someone who used to struggle all the time with negative thoughts. After my first major fight with depression, I had a nearly constant battle with negative thoughts. I hated myself, I felt worthless, like a failure, like I wasn't good enough for anything. I put myself down all the time because I felt like I wasn't worth anything. But eventually I decided I had enough. And for the next several months, I slowly changed my way of thinking. I forced myself to consciously remind myself that every negative thought I had was a lie. That it was wrong. I forced myself to stop them as soon as I thought something negative. I didn't let myself go down the vortex of negative thoughts. Basically, I taught my brain how to squash them. And let me tell you, it was HARD. It was EXHAUSTING. Some days I didn't feel like I had the energy to mentally fight those thoughts but I forced myself to anyway. And very gradually.. I realized that I wasn't having to fight the negative thoughts so hard. I had them still a lot but shutting them down wasn't as exhausting anymore. And as more time passed, eventually, I realized I was having less negative thoughts because my brain was learning how to stop them before they even happened. It was becoming second nature to just think something bad and be like wait nope oops that was negative, this is the reality "insert positive but TRUE thought instead". And over time, eventually I almost completely stopped having negative thoughts all together. And I began having BALANCED thoughts instead.
But in that journey of mine I learned also that being TRULY honest with myself was also very important. You can't fully stop negative thinking by telling yourself lies. Fake it til you make it can be a temporary bandaid but you have to learn what is real and what is not. And the first step is recognizing that ALL negative thoughts are lies. Even if they are triggered by a mistake or something that someone said, or something that happened, negative thoughts will always feed on those things and in turn, try to convince you that that mistake is 100 times worse, which makes those thoughts lies. A single sand sized grain of truth in an entire beach of lies doesn't make the lies suddenly true. And that's an important thing to remember. When you are trying to heal and learn how to stop negative thinking, it's important to surround yourself with positivity. Positive people, places, things that build you up. Because those positive things will help give you the energy to fight and to win your battle.
Just remember. It's a really tough battle.. Possibly the toughest you will ever have in your life. It can't be won in a day or a week, or even a month. It takes a long time, and a lot of willpower, and you will have to push yourself past every mental and sometimes even physical limit your brain will tell you that you have. But when you win that battle.. Everything you went through really does become worth it.
So this is a call to arms, for anyone who struggles with negative thoughts. Pick up your weapons (positivity and willpower) and get ready for the fight of your life. And you better believe that as long as you keep fighting, you are guaranteed to win.
A thought about mental health
I was just thinking about something very important.
It's okay and even GOOD to break cultural norms if your cultural norms are toxic and/or hurting you.
It's never disrespectful or wrong to actually take care of yourself and you are not less of a person for doing so. In fact the opposite is true. You are a BETTER person for overcoming toxic social norms and working to better yourself.
Even if doing so means you need to seek therapy or medication or outside help.
THE BRAIN IS AN ORGAN JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER PART OF YOUR BODY AND CAN GET SICK OR DAMAGED TOO.
If you overwork or don't take care of your heart it can get sick and start to break down and not work right. If you overwork your muscles they can get damaged and tear or bruise. If you don't properly take care of your teeth they can get damaged from that. Your brain is no different. It gets overworked and damaged and sick too. It's actually completely possible for your brain to get overwhelmed and confused on how to handle things because it is constantly doing so much.
In fact you are more likely to need help and treatment to help your brain stay in top shape than you are to need help with any other organ because the brain is used so much and is so important. Literally it controls every single other organ and part of your body so it gets overworked even more than the rest of your body does. There are actually probably more people on the planet right now who actually need help managing their mental health than there are people who don't. And that's just because of how society is these days because current society is damaging to us. Just because your parent or grandparents didn't need mental health help doesn't mean you are weak because you do. Today is a totally different world than the one your parents grew up in and also we understand more about the brain now and what it needs and what is unhealthy for it than we did when your family members were young.
Ignoring that damage doesn't make you stronger or better. It actually just makes that damage WORSE the longer you ignore it. Ignoring it is more likely to kill you because it puts extra stress on your brain which can physically cause it to break down more and more over time. In other words, ignoring your mental health literally means you are intentionally causing yourself brain damage. Not to mention how that damage also damages the rest of your body as well.
You wouldn't ignore other illnesses or damage like cancer or a broken bone because "if I ignore it it will go away and ignoring it makes me stronger". No, people know better than that. Such things cannot simply heal on their own without some sort of intervention to heal properly. Depression and anxiety are the same. They can't heal without help and intervention. So why would you ignore your brain's health when doing so is literally just as bad to ignore as cancer or a broken bone?
Treat depression and anxiety and other brain illnesses like you would cancer or a broken bone. Go to the right kind of person who can fix it and do it asap. Waiting won't help anything and will just make it worse.
Swallow your pride and take care of yourself. You will be a better person for doing so.
(Also healing your brain means you will be less hurtful and toxic to others too! Even and especially if you aren't meaning to hurt others in the first place. A sick brain causes toxic behavior even just by accident simply because a sick brain doesn't function normally.)
someone: sorry if I seem too needy
me: haha it's okay
me internally: please need me. please tell me everything about your day, how was your breakfast, what did you think about last? did you think about me? please need m
Star-Crossed (TV Show) Sentence Starters Pt. 1
❝ It’s not about making a point. It’s about saving my sister. That’s my job. ❞
❝ No, your job is to support her! ❞
❝ We’re from two different worlds, _____. ❞
❝ You have no idea what you’re talking about. ❞
❝ We can’t keep pretending that doesn’t matter. ❞
❝ Us minorities gotta stick together. ❞
❝ It only matters if we let it. ❞
❝ Did anyone see you come in? ❞
❝ I never got to say thank you. For saving my life. ❞
❝ We may be from different worlds, but in some way we’re still the same. ❞
❝ Do you think it doesn’t kill me every time I have to walk away from you? ❞
❝ I would feel a little safer if you and your can of pepper spray were around. ❞
❝ I am your weakness and I don’t want to be. ❞
❝ You’re a good guy, right? ❞
❝ I’m not a good guy, but you make me want to be one. ❞
❝ After the carnival he won’t even look at me. ❞
❝ You really know how to sweep a girl off her feet. ❞
❝ His whole world came crashing down. Now he has no one. ❞
❝ I can’t ask you to wait for a day that might never come. ❞
❝ Can this day possibly get anymore insane? ❞
❝ Looking real pretty, sweetheart. ❞
❝ Try to relax, you’re not be judged. ❞
❝ How did you get that scar? ❞
❝ The thing at the lake, I’m not going to hold you to it. ❞
❝ You need to cool off and I need some air. ❞
❝ All you ever do is push me away and pretend like I don’t exist. ❞
❝ I would give you everything. Just not now. ❞
❝ I wanted to keep you safe. ❞
❝ Don’t hurt him! ❞
❝ You don’t know this, but I’ve come pretty close to death before and I learned you have to believe you’re gonna make it or it’s like you’ve already lost. ❞
❝ When we were together you always came first. Still do. ❞
❝ My path always leads me right back here…to you. ❞
❝ Fighting for my people nearly lost both our lives. ❞
❝ No baby of mine is going to live inside a jail. ❞
❝ That jail is my home. ❞
❝ All I can think about it kissing you. ❞
❝ I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m not a little girl anymore. ❞
❝ If you could all just take the testosterone down a notch, you’d see we all want the same thing here, right? ❞
❝ You’re a knockout even if you’re knocked up. ❞
❝ You’re just like your father, full of naive optimism. Look where it got him. ❞
❝ It took 10 years for you to reconnect with him and like 10 seconds for you to dump him? ❞
❝ Do you think that I’m the kind of girl that’s worth fighting for? ❞
❝ I think you’re the kind of girl people go to war for. ❞
❝ I just don’t think you and me are worth fighting for. ❞
❝ I don’t think you can get really close to anyone until they’re completely honest with you. ❞
❝ You have an obsession with helping people, you know that? ❞
「やはり…愛されている」
[Certainly….I’m Loved]
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOUCHAN!!!!! <3333