TorieAteYourFriends

INFJ • AB- • Libra • Rat Plants are dear to my heart 🌱

[theshitneyspears]

every single person in this video is ME

[grawly]

[torieateyourfriends]

The new Death Note movie looks great

[babyanimalgifs]

So fluffy!

[merelybeing]

[just-shower-thoughts]

Next time a conspiracy theorist tries to tell you ‘what really happened’, present a more outlandish theory and accuse them of covering up the truth.

[janothar]

Conspiracy Theorist: “The moon landing was faked!”

Me: “Pfft, you believe in the moon?”

[yeehawlw]

HE JUST FCKING SCREAMS I-

[mielparaoshun]

Lmaoooo

[sushinfood]

[memethiefsteve]

[heartbeatemoji]

this is like so funny but terrifying¿ im laughing partially out of fear

[goodassdog]

[disgustinganimals]

don’t leave animals alone in your home. this could happen to you.

[veryfemmeandantifascist]

Me listening to George Michael

[rageofthenerd]

View this post on Instagram

I’M FUCKING DEAD Johnny did Agape holy shit

[torieateyourfriends]

@shitmedik

[libertarirynn-deactivated202006]

Responsible af. 10/10, good doggo.

[trashg0d-deactivated20180217]

You can’t be mad at him

[psychedelicfelon]

Definitely should give him a treat

[mjalti]

why come they called him “beast” in the castle when everyone knew his name cuz they’d been working for him forever anyway? like …. i would just be like “hey chewbacca-Adam” or some shit, there’s no reason to call him beast … id hide in my room all day too if my employees started making fun of me..

[teaboot]

If my manager decided to pull some rude ass shit with a witch and got me living the next ten years of my life as an immortal singing toaster oven you can bet your ass I’d wake him up every goddamn morning with a flaming panini directly to the face. rise and shine, you ugly fuck, time hear a song

[teaboot]

I call this one, “ode to an inconsiderate pissbaby” and the first 9 verses are just me screaming at various decibels

[cartooncoyote]

[officialpigeon]

Person: “I’m 6ft tall”

me: *tries to imagine six subway sandwiches on top of eachother*

[danisnotonfires]

[tessie-the-bee]

My naym is dog My frend is smol He dose not fetch Or thro the ball But I not chays Or bite like cat Insted I’m kind I lyk the rat

My naym is rat And this caynine He show me how to have good tyme I stand up tall Upon my toes I stretch my tung I lyk his nose

[advanced-procrastination]

I love you

[katswenski]

[pattythenest]

Are you fucking kidding me

[5weekdays]

[justcatposts]

Omg, he’s trying to sing along

cute animal vines?