Hey guys
So uhhhhhhh... remember when I said a few days ago that I was back?
Yeah actually I'm not quite as back as I originally intended. 😅 In fact, pretty soon after this, I may not be back ever. Like, this is one of the last posts I'll make on this blog.
Don't worry, I'm fine!!! I am thriving and life is moving forward at God's pace. Actually, that's why I'm planning to leave soon.
While I was away in another country where my sole focus was the Lord's work, I asked God if there was anything He'd asked me to do that I'd been holding back on. Anything I needed to surrender to Him. And any time I've ever asked God that, the answer is always whatever thing is capturing more of my attention than He is.
In this case... FNAF.
I've been hearing Him say it for a while. Which has puzzled me, because in the past the things He's asked me to give up has always had something in it that wasn't good for me. But FNAF, though often dark and depressing (and admittedly not without its narrative flaws), has never seemed "bad" for me. (You could actually do a lot worse in picking an indie horror franchise to hyperfixate on!)
But even though FNAF isn't a bad thing to think about, the fact remains that I think about it a lot. Probably more than I think about the things of God. And so, my friends, it's time to step back.
And what's crazy is this is the first time I don't feel like I'm being scolded by God about this!! This is the first time I've felt at peace with simply stepping away from an obsession! It's crazy, guys, but I think that's from God! I've grown closer to Him. I know how much He loves me. It's not a fight anymore, it's a partnership. An understanding that I want to take back my time and thoughts and energy and give them to something greater and more worthy--the most worthy. It's like God is asking "What could happen if you give Me all your time?" And for the first time in my life, I find that exciting rather than scary. :)
(Okay, it's still a little bit scary. But still. I'm at peace.)
I think that FNAF being in a waiting period between games and movies is a big help for this change (another blessing from God). It would be a lot harder to step away if the new game was upon us NOW lol. And I know I've lost a lot of time scrolling the internet for updates and theories and who liked my post and did anyone make any new memes about the latest trailer and--
Maybe it's time for me to rest from all that.
It's not a bad thing. :)
I've had a wonderful time running around in this community on the internet, getting to experience an fandom and its events in progress in REAL TIME alongside other people who are also experiencing it, which is something I missed out on a lot growing up. It's been a blast!! :D Thank y'all for hanging out with me.
I'm most likely still going to see FNAF 3 when it comes out, I just won't be posting about it. Which kinda sucks, because I'd love to hear y'all's thoughts too. And about the next new game. But I really do have other stuff to spend my time on. Like my original fiction series that is supermassive and needs all the time I can give it. And whatever else God has for me.
I'm also probably going to keep writing Night Terrors in the background (because it's become a savior for my sanity when my original fiction is being difficult), just not posting it. Maybe when I finish it I'll upload the entire thing to AO3, but for now that project is going silent. Which also sucks as I didn't want to start something and not finish it, but it's okay. The Aftons are safe in my heart. :)
FNAF will always have a special place in my heart, as will any of you guys I've gotten to interact with. And I'll still be here on Tumblr! If you ever wanna hang out, come visit my other blog, @peeta-mellarks-smile, where I ramble about The Hunger Games and all the other stuff I love. Drop a comment on a post if you wanna chat! Leave an ask in my box! Send me a DM!!
I'll miss you guys. :) Have a good time out there, and remember: God made you special, and He loves you very much.
-Tortilla <3
Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. (2 Corinthians 5:17, ESV)
















