incorrect quotes from the 118

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: HELP! I TOLD BOBBY I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK! Eddie, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

[totallycorrect-911]

Chimney: As usual, Chimney has to save the day! Hen: As usual, Hen has to hear about it.

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: *casually taking four stairs at a time* Chimney, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fu-

[totallycorrect-911]

Hen: I was voted "friendliest classmate" in high school. Chimney: I was voted "most likely to become a clown"... Buck: You think that's bad? I was voted "most likely to get rabies"!

[totallycorrect-911]

Bobby: You have an impressive pain tolerance. Buck: Thanks, it's the trauma.

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: We should normalize not loving family members. Eddie: You can just say: "I hate my dumb fuck parents" or whatever. Talk like a normal person!

[totallycorrect-911]

Chimney, to Eddie: When was the last time you let someone hug you? Eddie: *thinking* Eddie: 2021. Hen: 2021...? Eddie: Yeah. I almost died and it really freaked Buck out so I let him hug me.

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: Small creatures are much more vicious because they have a smaller body to bottle up all their emotions. Bobby: Ridiculous. Give me some examples. Hen: Wasps? Chimney: Terriers? Buck: Athena.

[totallycorrect-911]

Bobby: While I'm gone, you're in charge Buck. Buck: Yes! Bobby, whispering to Hen: You're secretly in charge, but I don't want him to feel bad. Hen: Obviously.

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: I'm going to get myself some soup. Bobby: Be careful not to burn yourself, it's hot. Buck: Pfft, I won't burn myself. *30 seconds later* Buck, entering the room: I burned myself.

[totallycorrect-911]

Chimney, spraying a melted cutting board with a tiny water gun: We gotta cool this bitch down. Cool it down. Buck: I actually just put the cutting board in the oven... Hen, visibly confused: Okay, so you decided to put the cutting board in the oven? Chimney, spraying Buck: You FUCKING DUMBASS! Buck: Dude, I forgot- Chimney: OH MY FUCKING GOD! We're trying to make Chicken Alfredo right now, and you fucking MELT the cutting board in the oven at 400 DEGREES FAHRENHEIT!? Bobby: *watching in complete confusion while trying to process this whole situation*

[totallycorrect-911]

Bobby: Truth or dare? Buck: Truth. Bobby: How many hours have you slept this week? Buck: ... Buck: Dare. Bobby: Go to sleep. Buck: I don't like this game.

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: You are, of course, wondering why it is I have brought you here tonight. Bobby: Actually, Buck, after all these years, I just sort of go with it.

[totallycorrect-911]

Bobby: I'm telling you, my team is competent. Chimney, rushing in: Bobby! Buck tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!

[totallycorrect-911]

Bobby: Go to sleep or you'll hate yourself in the morning! Buck: I'll hate myself in the morning regardless.

[totallycorrect-911]

Buck: Are you busy? Eddie: Yes. Buck: Cool, listen to this.

[totallycorrect-911]

Bobby: Buck, is that my mug you're drinking out of? Buck: No, it's mine. Bobby: It... looks just like the one I have. Buck: You don't have one like this anymore.