Her old self... A part of her wanted to laugh at that. Who had her 'old self' actually been aside from a stupid, naive fool? She'd put her trust into something - someone - and been hurt for it, time and time again... And every time, she'd picked herself up and dusted herself off, thinking that if she just got stronger, it'd all be better. She could make things work like they needed to be if she could just take control and fight harder to make it work...
But in the end, all she'd done was cause pain, both to herself and those around her, averting her gaze for just a moment as the small, nagging voices in the back of her head reminded her of exactly that. Her chest felt tight, sore... How much had she even failed the boy before her, she wondered...?
"...I am sorry," she'd repeat after a moment's pause, pulling her gaze back up to Ren. Care of the kids had always been a unit-wide task; with them all viewing one another as family, they'd been quick to take to helping with care of first Sofia and Anastasia, then Niko, and it had just become commonplace to ask them for help when they needed it... But Ren was just a teenager, himself. Being a Fatuus already stripped him of far too much in his life, she couldn't ask him to be a temporary parent, too! He deserved better - Everyone deserved better, and she had-
With a deep breath, Kag stepped aside, opening the door a little further. If he wanted to step inside, she'd welcome it - She just hoped he wouldn't mind the mess the bedroom had become, tissues strewn everywhere, bed a mess, plush fox left on a pillow that normally would have been Childe's... The dim lighting had been comfortable, at least, Operative stepped away from the door in hopes of pulling herself back together, even just a little. "It's fine. If he has a problem with you checking on me... Just...."
Just... What? A part of her screamed it was bad to go against orders; what if they got found out for being lazy? What if-
"Tell him I asked for it." That would be good enough, right? Then if anyone got in trouble, it'd be her, and she... She deserved it, honestly. "Keep up... Mmm. Keep up your training as you have been... Tell... Tell me about how you've been more. How... Things have been out there."
Just talk to me for a bit... Please...?
'Are you two having issues again?'
The question teased at Ren's mouth, its desire for the teen's thoughts to go unfiltered threatening him to ask the obvious with only his self control to keep his curiosities unvoiced. With the room he could see past the door frame a wreck and Kag's disheveled look not helping prove anything otherwise; it actually didn't take him long to connect the pieces. Kag and their Harbinger were usually an almost inseparable pair, but now that Ren really got to thinking about it-
He actually hadn't seen both Kag and Lord Tartaglia in the same room together in awhile. Though Childe still talked about Kag as if there were nothing wrong romantically...was their Operative falling in battle really the only thing that'd lead to her absence?
" ... "
Still, Ren knew when to be cautious with his words So this time, instead of saying too much, he'd simply bow his head in a slight 'thanks' for her hospitality before stepping his way inside Kag's room sit on a small sofa inside. Normally, he wouldn't mind the blankets that laid strewn all over its cushions, but today? Their chaos just added to the awkwardness of the room.
" I really don't think he'll mind. Last I heard, he was busy with something else anyway, but he wouldn't really say with what. But he'll be back tonight though, I'm sure! " Ren would fidget, lightly lifting a hand to toy at the coin pendent he often wore as his 'good luck charm' just to give his mind something else to think about.
" Other than that, there hasn't been that much going on lately? Emi and I went out for a picnic for my birthday and Rei ate so much of that cake I saved you a piece of, I actually thought she was gonna cry after. She did manage to drag us all out to go look at the ocean after that though, so she couldn't have been feeling that bad. "
" She...hasn't been by to tell you that already though, has she? "













