schitt’s creek sentence meme / episodes 1.03 – 1.05
feel free to change pronouns, tenses, wording, etc etc for your muse.
“It must be a nice feeling, considering you don’t have a lot right now.”
“You don’t see anything wrong with this?”
“People come from all over to take a picture with it.”
“They dare to call me irrelevant?”
“Shag carpeting! That’s irrelevant.”
“There wasn’t like, a spark or anything.”
“She was face down on the floor earlier, dragging herself to the closet.”
“My horoscope said I shouldn’t assume responsibility for anybody but myself today.”
“I know this is a bizarre concept for you.”
“It’s not like your boyfriend left you for a Scandinavian flight attendant.”
“I should be the one in the closet, not you.”
“I think we should go get something to eat, because when you’re eating you can’t be talking to me.”
“I’ve been told I have really good taste.”
“Why do they give you table scraps? Are you like, a poor person?”
“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”
“I’m eating egg whites and hoping the building will collapse.”
“That must have taken such courage to ask me that.”
“You’re going to work until it hurts.”
“I can be cool without drugs.”
“Well, how does that make it any better?”
“When they get mean, you tell them to go to hell.”
“You’ll find some glimmer of something to hold on to.”
“Putting groceries in a bag isn’t as complicated as one might think.”
“Why must you be so constantly irksome?”
“Do you not know my middle name?”
“We have so many disasters bombarding us right now.”
“You’re pretty. What’s that like?”
“You’re not the only druggie in town.”
“Orange is the new orange.”
“Who needs fourteen grey suits?”
“You try putting a cashmere sweater in a washing machine.”
“It’s one chromosome away from a crocheted blanket.”
“It’s actually pretty clean around here, which is shocking.”
“What’s wrong with living in a barn?”
“My car’s worth less than your pants.”
“Sadly, and most of the time, I have no interest in what’s going on with you.”
“Babies play that at their birthday parties.”
“I’m miserable, drunk, and hate this game.”
“One time I escaped a drug lord’s trunk by bribing him with sex.”
“How many people do you know who are currently in the prison system?”
“Guys like that will bone anything.”
“Politician’s neglected wife sleeps with farmhand. I love it.”
“I’m just saying that your secret is safe with me.”
“Half the time I’m there he doesn’t even want me there.”
“If he listened to me, he wouldn’t be sitting in a hut making his own underwear.”
“Everything else has been taken from me.”
“Does it look like I shop on Canal Street?”
“And you normally going around spying on people?”
“You left me here to be abducted by long-haul truckers!”
“I’m just not that down with the labels.”
“And you wonder why I make fun of you.”
“I don’t think anybody has sex in here unless they’re paid for it.”
“I’m embarrassed for you.”
“I saw hell, that’s what happened.”
“I know what I saw and I can’t unsee it.”
“Shame on you for attempting that position at 8 o’clock in the morning.”
“This is a conversation we will never have.”
“I don’t want to turn into my parents.”
“I’m starting to get a pretty good feeling myself.”
“Oh my god, are you a dirty peeping tom?”
“I request that you try not to contact me for 24 hours.”
“Yet another disturbing look into his world.”
“Your mess is making me anxious.”
“I’m looking forward to sleeping in a bed that’s not made for a toddler.”
“Why would you do that to me right now?”
“I miss being around loose acquaintances that tell me I’m funny and charming.”
“You are a very bright, funny person with a wide range of knowledge.”
“They’ve got no money issues, that’s why they’re happy.”
“Who wants a shot, because I do.”
“I’m still alive, that’s the main thing.”
“Every time the vein in _________’s eye twitches, we take a shot.”
