* but i'm just the sidekick !

𝖠𝖬𝖤𝖱𝖨𝖢𝖠'𝖲⠀⠀𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐋⠀⠀𝖭𝖠𝖳𝖨𝖮𝖭𝖠𝖫 ⠀⠀𝖳𝖱𝖤𝖠𝖲𝖴𝖱𝖤.

[treasured]

*   from @analyticallyminded​  :   “took me a while to find you.”   (✉︎)

the  bible  says  something  about  lampshades  and  bushel  baskets,      about  how  goodness,   how  love,     shouldn’t  be  hidden.     -----   or  something  like  that    ;      sunday  school  was  several  years  and  excommunicable  sins   ago.       still,   he  thinks  of  it  now,      seated  across  from  her  in  a  black  sweatshirt  with  the  hood  up  at  hole - in - wall   coffee  shop   where  he’d  requested  she  come  meet  him.       even  google  maps  didn’t  recognize  the  address.       ❝  yeah,    i   bet.    i’m  sorry.     i  mean,    we’re  both  pretty  hipster,    but .  .  .   ❞     he  tries  for  a  smile,     while  under  the  table,     scrawny  knees  in  dark  denim  squeeze  tighter  around  his  laptop  bag.      his  eyes  wander  to  the  left  of  his  lady  to  survey  the  establishment,     where  they  sit  alone  save   the  barista  in  a  muscle  tee.     tattoos  cover  no  less  than  80%  of  visible  real  estate  of  his  skin  and  a  nasty  resting  bitch  face.    quickly,    riley  averts  his  eyes,    drops  his  voice. 

❝   ben’s  got  us  wrapped  up  with  these  guys.         and  i’m  not  saying  they’re  the  mafia,     but  i’m  also  NOT  SAYING  they’re  NOT  the  mafia,     if  you  get  my  drift.     i’ve  been  instructed  to  keep  to  certain .  .  .    territories.     ❞  

[andhungry]

PACIFIC RIM SENTENCE STARTERS.

‘  when i was a kid, whenever i’d feel small or lonely, i’d look up at the stars. wondered if there was life up there.  ‘

‘  tens of thousands of lives were lost.  ‘

‘  this was just the beginning.  ‘

‘  to fight monsters, we created monsters of our own.  ‘

‘  we got really good at it. winning.  ‘

‘  hey, kid. don’t get cocky.  ‘

‘  please, after you. age before beauty.  ‘

‘  you know what i’m thinking.  ‘

‘  worry about yourself, kiddo!  ‘

‘  ___, listen to me!  ‘

‘  suits and ties, flashy smiles. that’s all they are.  ‘

‘  bad news: three guys died yesterday.  ‘

‘  well, orders are orders. what else am i supposed to do?  ‘

‘  took me a while to find you.  ‘

‘  i can’t have anyone else in my head again. i’m done.  ‘

‘  haven’t you heard? the world is coming to an end.  ‘

‘  so where would you rather die? here, or ____?  ‘

‘  oh, no, call me ___. only my mother calls me doctor.  ‘

‘  he was 2,500 tons of awesome. or awful. you know, whatever you wanna call it.  ‘

‘  shut up. i don’t love them, okay? i study them.  ‘

‘  things have changed. we’re not an army anymore, we’re the resistance.  ‘

‘  i didn’t know it was this bad.  ‘

‘  sorry about your brother.  ‘

‘  you haven’t told me what i’m doing here yet.  ‘

‘  numbers do not lie. politics and poetry, promises, these are lies. numbers are as close as we get to the handwriting of god.  ‘

‘  politics and poetry, promises, these are lies.  ‘

‘  and this… is the point where he goes completely crazy.  ‘

‘  fortune favors the brave, dude.  ‘

‘  they won’t give you the equipment, and even if they did, you’d kill yourself.  ‘

‘  she’s one of a kind now.  ‘

‘  i think you’re unpredictable.  ‘

‘  you take risks that endanger yourself and your crew. i don’t think you’re the right man for this mission.  ‘

‘  wow. thank you for your honesty.  ‘

‘  one day, you’re gonna see that in combat you make decisions. and you have to live with the consequences.  ‘

‘  you promised me.  ‘

‘  vengeance is like an open wound.  ‘

‘  to me, you’re dead weight. you slow me down, i’m gonna drop you like a sack of shit.  ‘

‘  i’ve raised him on my own. he’s a smart kid, but i never knew whether to give him a hug or a kick in the ass.  ‘

‘  it’s a dialogue, not a fight.  ‘

‘  better watch it.  ‘

‘  i’m not crazy. you felt it, right?  ‘

‘  this is worth fighting for.  ‘

‘  if you’re listening to this, well, i’m either alive and i’ve proven what i’ve just done works, in which case, ha ha, i won. or i’m dead and i’d like you to know that it’s all your fault. it really is, you know, you drove me to this. in which case, ha, i also won. sort of.  ‘

‘  are you gonna say anything?  ‘

‘  you look good.  ‘

‘  like when you blink your eyes over and over and over again and all you really see are like, frames. it was emotion.  ‘

‘  i’m okay. just let me control it.  ‘

‘  you are a goddamn disgrace. you’re gonna get us all killed.  ‘

‘  why don’t you just do us all a favor and disappear? it’s the only thing you’re good at.  ‘

‘  so, what, you’re grounding us?  ‘

‘  one: don’t you ever touch me again. two: don’t you ever touch me again.  ‘

‘  now, you have no idea who the hell i am or where i’ve come from, and i’m not about to tell you my whole life story.  ‘

‘  you know, you live in someone else’s head for so long… the hardest part to deal with is the silence.  ‘

‘  well, that’s classified. so i couldn’t tell you. even if i wanted to. but it is pretty cool, so i might tell you. i’m gonna tell you.  ‘

‘  jesus, we can’t just sit here and watch them die.  ‘

‘  let me in, i’m a doctor!  ‘

‘  we have a choice here. we either sit and wait, or we take these flare guns and do something really stupid.  ‘

‘  as harsh as it sounds, there is no time to celebrate. we lost people. no time to grieve.  ‘

‘  how sick are you? and why didn’t you tell me?  ‘

‘  i haven’t exactly had a very good day, okay?  ‘

‘  we’re gonna own this bad boy!  ‘

‘  by jove, we are going to own this thing for sure!  ‘

‘  today, at the edge of our hope, at the end of our time, we have chosen not only to believe in ourselves, but in each other.  ‘

‘  today we are canceling the apocalypse!  ‘

‘  as for you, well, you’re easy. you’re an egotistical jerk with daddy issues. a simple puzzle i solved on day one.  ‘

‘  i just don’t want to regret all the things that i never said out loud.  ‘

‘  well, my father always said, if you have the shot, you take it. so let’s do this.  ‘

‘  all i have to do is fall. anyone can fall.  ‘

‘  i can’t find his pulse. i don’t think he’s breathing.  ‘

‘  no. don’t go. please.  ‘

‘  you’re squeezing me too tight. i couldn’t breathe.  ‘

‘  where is my goddamn shoe?  ‘

[treasured]

*  surprise, we’re baaaack !   :   for @staticveil​

 ❝   -----------  so,   just  out  of  curiosity  :        were  you  BORN  this  bitchy  ?       or  did  you  have  to  go  to  school  for  it ?     maybe  a  master’s ?    ph.d  program ?   ❞        a  small,   teasing  grin  is  disguised  around  a  straw  as  he  glances  at  her,      sucks  long  and  hard  on  his  milkshake.      double  chocolate,    whipped  creme,    hold  the  cherry.   

[treasured]

okay,    pay  attention   :      i’ve  brought  you  to  the  library  of  congress.        why ?        because  it’s  the  biggest  library  in  the  world.       it’s  all  right  here.       over  20  million  books.         and  they’re  all   saying  the  same  thing ---------------    LISTEN  TO  RILEY. 

[treasured]

where are my french fries???

                ❝   .  .  .    definitely  NOT  in my belly.     if that’s what you were insinuating.   ❞       

[treasured]

analyticallyminded‌: 

               ❝ i’m no expert on such matters, but typically i think those types of magazines are usually meaning something more along the lines of sex and dates, not getting yourself punched, i assume? in the eye. ❞     she may sound exhausted, and she is, really, but it’s more out of concern than anything else. gentle hands tilt his head back, exposing the mottled bruises to the light.

                 sharp intake of breath manifests itself in pointed HISS,   assault of direct light to retinas.    swollen lid blinks shut in defense.     did he mention his head aches,   rattled from force of impact ?      no,  of course not.    too busy flirting.         ❝   yeah,   bar fight.    some jerk at this ------  this real seedy place ben agreed to meet an informant.   ❞        half - hearted shrug,   down play.     it’s no big deal,  jem.    half  smile,    crooked,    cracked.      ❝   you should see the other guy. ❞

[treasured]

analyticallyminded‌:

✿┊open.

    ❝ next time you’re planning to injure yourself to get my attention, just remember that a little sweet talk works wonders. ❞

              ❝   see,   you say that,    but i read in an issue of cosmopolitan that you’re supposed to shake things up in a relationship ----  keep things FRESH.  ❞        and what,    after all,    is fresher than these purple and blue hues darkening his eye socket,     what more intimate than her fingers against the side of his head surveying the damage with her critical eye ?   

[treasured]

64

ACCEPTING:  my spotify wrapped 2018 starters  /   “CLEAR”  -  needtobreathe 

              YOU AREN’T HUNGRY?    is what her eyes are asking.   

              YOU’RE  ALWAYS  HUNGRY.     she knows him too well.    ARE  THE  PANCAKES  NOT  GOOD?     ARE THEY NOT WHAT YOU WANTED? 

               ❝   i WANTED  pancakes.   pancakes are .  . .     pancakes are what i wanted.   ❞     he answers the questions she hasn’t asked.   it doesn’t dawn on him that maybe she was asking different ones or that he should let her speak things aloud instead of assuming he can read minds.    ❝   and they’re GOOD.   everything you make is .  .  .    is so GOOD.  ❞     as if he really knows that,  empirically.    he’s had all of two bites,   maybe three,   all fluffy batter and maple syrup and ——- blueberry?     are these blueberry pancakes?   fuck if he knows, he hasn’t gotten that far.        

                 ❝   it’s nothing,    it’s just —————  ❞       it’s just that  HE’S  SO  FUCKING  TIRED,    but that’s not fair to say  because   she’s so tired,   too.      and that doesn’t even scratch the surface of their issues,   doesn’t make a dent in the pile of shit they haven’t talked about.    there’s a weird sediment has settled in their bones,   making all their movements stiff and awkward and achy.     at this point,    they’ve ignored it so long,    they’re pretending they’ve shaken it all out and sweep it under the rug to live with all the dust bunnies.       (    he thought he could live like that,    that he could live above them,   could reconcile sleeping at his place or on her couch for the rest of his life so long as it meant he still got to claim some kind  of connection to her.   )      

                BUT HE CAN’T.      he can’t and it’s tearing him up inside. 

                ❝   we don’t have to .  .  .     we don’t have to hash out everything  right here right now when you’re .  .  .    and i’m .  .  .  ❞     eyebrows knot together,   adam’s apple bobs with a thick swallow.     he’s not making eye contact,   not connecting sentences together.       ❝   it’s not right,  ❞     IT’S  SELFISH  is what he really means,       ❝   for me to get to —- for me to dictate when o– or how we talk about .  .  .    you know.  ❞      he’s the one who left.     he’s the one who left  LIKE THAT.      he’s the one making a mess of,  well,    everything. 

                ❝   i just wanna —–   ❞      he heaves a sigh weighty as a dumbbell,  wants to look at her again,   but fears what questions her eyes might ask this time.        ❝   you’re the only thing that i —— that i’ve ever been sure of and i know .  .  .   ❞        his mouth hangs open,   a million big and little sentiments that he doesn’t know how to communicate hanging thick in the air between them. 

                                                       (  which is,  of course,    just another way of failing her.   )