oh my god stop saying abuela was gaslighting her family for years
People keep tossing around the word gaslight without knowing what it actually entails. Abuela would have to be (a combination of) constantly (and I am talking BEFORE the events of the movie because proper gaslighting takes time)
lying about her actions, lying about events, lying in general
trivializing emotions about her behavior as "you're just crazy" and "it's not a big deal"
blaming others for her own mistakes or making up false rumors
lovebombing
pretending things did or did not happen
...to the extent that the victims:
second guess themselves
start to doubt their reality, their judgements, their perceptions, their feelings
...combined with Abuela enjoying the control.
I feel a lot of actions in the movie border it, but aren't actually gaslighting. The only Abuela actions I would say count are the cracks scene and the argument. Pepa is told to suppress her feelings, not that they’re false or fake. Bruno was ostracized and blamed for his visions, but never questioned his reality. (Although it’s possible he did start to blame himself, but that’s definitely more on the villagers.) Mirabel was treated lesser than the others, but she still has a sheer amount of confidence and, again, doesn’t question her reality.
It bugs me to hell and back. We don't see in the movie anyone ever question their sanity. That's something someone would do if being gaslit for years. We only see a fraction of their lives - two days, and these two days are prefaced with several stressful events that altered the family dynamic, and even then I saw zero real evidence of prolonged gaslighting.
stooooop
