Untitled

[andrewjelqingjihad-deactivated2]

[twiliightprincess]

i feel safe knowin members like this are workin in the FBI

[8lackrom]

tips on writing essays:

skip the title! You can always come back to it

skip the intro! It can often be the hardest part

skip all the body paragraphs

skip the conclusion

skip the whole fucking essay fucking do it who gives a shit 

[brown-eyedbaby]

[tastefullyoffensive]

[wellillbedamned]

Hey can the man who made this commercial please step forward?

I just want to talk

[goopy-amethyst-deactivated20250]

I can’t believe the red M&M’s canon humanization is Danny DeVito

[wellillbedamned]

I’m really surprised that you restrained yourself from making a vore joke

[goopy-amethyst-deactivated20250]

The FBI agent assigned to me would kill me of I try to say that Danny Devito is into vo

[kingofthenorth]

“What if raccoons figured out the secret to starting fires?” is the scariest hypothetical question my dad has ever posed

[ayellowbirds]

that’s the distinction between goblins and raccoons

[silly-overwatch-stuff]

“IT’S OVER, PHARMERCY. I HAVE THE HIGH GROUND.”

By wahw_ow

[tag-redfield]

Excuse me what

[adonischildsupportcase]

[quickweaves]

I’m glad I watched this

[gh0stcity]

One thing I’ve learned in life, if you act really self-assured and confident you can pretty much get away with anything.

[gh0stcity]

For example, I’ve watched someone walk on to a plane with no passport. Just walked right on.

[jennitheodd]

Once walked out of a dude’s house with a pair of his pants slung over my shoulder. Did all the usual eye-contact, saying-goodbye movements and noises, just… while stealing his pants. He did not notice. 

[razorlightt-deactivated20161221]

I told my English teacher that she graded my final paper(I did not turn one in) and that she told me it was well written. She scrambled 3 days trying to find the nonexistent paper, then apologized to me for losing it and gave me a 96%. Confidence is key

[whiskey-and-a-wry-smile-blog]

my dad’s mate just walked out of a shop with a canoe and didn’t get questioned

[matt-the-blind-cinnamon-roll]

Humans are like bees: if they sense you’re an intruder all hell will break loose, but if you get inside the hive they just assume you belong there. Be confident.

[normalwizard]

we should honestly start using this gif instead of the “how could you say something so controversial yet so brave” one

[cincosechzehn-deactivated201901]

[the-light-of-animation]

Why not? Because it’s all for naught. Oh, dear! I can’t tie a knot.

requested by Anonymous

[somethingclassic]

[captainspensaurus-deactivated20]

the fact that there’s only about 5000 people who’ve reblogged this scares me. That means that less that 5000 people know where these come from.

I feel old…

[sahltyy]

very odd

[nosdrinker]

literally every person on earth has read the very hungry caterpillar

[squareenix-official-deactivated]

Why does this man hate himself so much? (x)

[dreams-squared]

JOHN PLS

[bonerfart]

surfing the internet in 2020: sweet, this lootbox I just opened will allow me to check my emails at 80% of full speed for the next 8 hours

[gif87a-com]

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

How many horsepower is 1 horse?

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

Okay logically it follows that a horse is 1 horse power but what’s the standard? Because horses aren’t the same

[fullmetalwindbreaker]

the average horse can produce almost 15 horsepower

[e-seal-deactivated20210319]

[ruinedchildhood]

[d-e-l-ete-d-deactivated20181014]

Shang went for the D

But settled for the pussy

[ducktorphil]

scoured the entire kingdom for the pussy

[baggyandkitty]

slayed a dragon for the pussy

[thefrankwhiteproject-blog]

Turned into a frog for the pussy