What a Capybara is?

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Misleadingly relieved

You know... Sometimes I feel like I just took a huge shit. But then I get up, and it's the most mediocre pieces of poop I've ever seen. And suddenly the whole schmeagle is ruined.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Clingy netflix

Jesus fucking Christ netflix, I already agreed with your new fucking terms, stop asking. I'll agree with whatever the fuck new policy you have, i'll even give up my freaking privacy but STOP ASKING ME TO AGREE TO YOUR SHIT THROUGH YOUR ANNOYING POP-UPS. Why you have to be soo needy? Keeps fucking suggesting, recommending shows that you think I'm gonna like... Fucking hell. YOU DON'T KNOW ME. Every fucking day. Java wants to update... Flash is outdated... Windows needs to update. You wanna a angry user? INTERRUPT HIS MASTURBATION. That's all it takes, companys of earth.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

I original

Sometimes I get afraid that I am just a collection of other people's thoughts and perspectives, and that I will never come up with something original and my existence is pointless and the chocolate milk tastes bad etc etc... But then... Then I remember that I came up with some pretty funny made-up words when I was younger. I'm good.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Yeah, just bring supplies for my baby and what you're gonna eat and drink.

Found a baby shower invite on top of the kitchen table. It's addressed to my mom, and it asks her to bring diapers, food and drink for the party. Y'all know what it lacks? The name of the family or even the name of the baby. Actually there's nothing but demands on the thing. It's not even a party... It's begging. It's imposing. Kinda like this: -Bring two packages of diapers. (And then the person jumps a line, not to intertwine the diapers with the begging for food and drinks). -2 liters of soda. - a cake. Yes. They demand a cake.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

dad is without a job

My dad got fired and I kinda feel sorry for him. Not because of the firing part, you see, but because since then my mother is treating him like he suddenly lost both his legs in a weird accident. It's kinda my family reaction to every single bad thing that happens to you... To treat you like a crippled person.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Dad is without a job

My dad got fired and I kinda feel bad for him. Not because of the firing, you see, but because my mother has been treating him like he lost both of his legs since then. It's kinda my family reaction to every single bad thing that happens to you... To treat you like a crippled person.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Give me space, mother

My mom has extra-sensorial notion of the space around her, I'm certain of it. And how she uses it? To keep bumping in to me whenever I go to the kitchen. I should hug her more.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Whenever I present my dog with this treat that I buy for him, I imagine everything goes silent in his little hearing thingys. Other dogs barking on the street? Nope, can't hear them. The fucking itch in my tail? It is forgotten. The fly I've been trying to catch mid fly? Couldn't give a fuck. For about 15 human seconds, he has never been closer to eternal doggy happiness... And then I open my hand and it is empty. Because fuck him and his easy achieved happiness. I wonder if there is a human equivalent feeling for this? Sex probably. I wouldn't know.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

I'm gonna send you to the wrong place, lady.

Wanna know how I know that people suck? Every fucking time someone asks ME for directions, I end up feeling shitty because I don't have a clue where your fucking street is.

[troubledcapibara-blog]

Svetlana

I just google’d the name Svetlana, for no reason. Makes me wonder if Svetlana is googlin’ the name Lucas for no reason also.

Go ahead Svetlana, google me. I dare you.