the discourse is pointless

transmasc, gay, autistic | 20 | he/him only this is my arguing blog. click for mobile about

[sepulchritude]

Do new ace people these days know about black rings?

[anotherknifeinmyhands]

uhh, i don’t.

[boyplushie]

yeah! there’s a thing where ace people can wear a black ring on the middle finger of their right hand as a sign to show others that they’re ace!

(I couldn’t find a version of this pic without the bottom text, sorry)

[stubbornseedling]

I had no idea this was falling out of common knowledge. Boost to get it rolling again! Quick tip from an ace who’s been wearing the black ring for like five plus years now and has gone through several either broken or too scratched to wear- save yourself the trouble, go straight for ceramic.

there’s also aro rings, pretty much the same concept but with white rings, dont leave us out of it!

It fell out of common knowledge because exclusionists destroyed our communities 

[tired-lesbian-hours]

No you heathen, it’s out of practice because it never belonged to your community. It was never an ace thing. Those are called Equality Rings, they were worn as a promise that the wearer wouldn’t get married until gay marriage was legal. This also extended to bisexual and trans people. Stop trying to co-opt gay history and rebrand it as something for ace people.

[terflies]

(still)

[eroticcannibal]

Huh, no one has heard of this and suddenly over the past day or two, I’ve seen multiple blogs say it out of nowhere, with nothing to back it up?

Exclusionists have a habit of doing this, do you think they plan it, or are they a hivemind?

[celciusdiscourse]

Bigot bias really is a wonderful, hideous thing. Thankfully the most recent replies call that addition out for the unfounded bullshit it is, but if you scroll up in the notes, there’s a lot of people just. Accepting this, no questions asked. Because they already think so badly of ace people and their communities that they want to believe it despite coming from literally nowhere.

And this isn’t the first time this has happened.

The term “a-spec” went through the same exact bullshit! Despite having no source aside from the claims of a group of exclusionists, and even that was refuted by the entire rest of the autistic community and a simple google search.

And that this reply would be added right after somebody mentions the damage aphobes do to online ace communities?? The specific damage of silencing ace people about their community? Huh. Isn’t that just a hilarious coincidence?

Anyway, black rings on the middle finger have been an ace community thing for the past 14 years, and I actually have a source,

which not only exactly dates the development of the symbol, but also shows the exact process of how the community came up with it. In fact, if you read through the thread, there’s people already on page 2 discussing how to implement it without infringing on parallel communities’ symbols (like triangles, or lesbians’ own secret rings).

So who’s actually the one “co-opting history” here??

[oreganotrail-deactivated2019121]

if you plan on starting T at any point do not diagnose yourself as asexual. that will change

[tem-pissed-in-a-t-pot]

Please tell me this is a joke

[twink-privilege]

nah i can tell you with confidence t didn’t change my attraction capabilities only libido so like this post only makes sense if you literally cannot tell apart “attracted to someone” and “horny” which seems like a You problem

[wormy-onions]

@ exclus please be careful when ur doing those “[character] is allo and FUCKS” jokes to troll the inclus. make absolute fucking certain that the character (and the inclu in question if you’re directly responding to someone) is NOT A MINOR. don’t attribute anything sexual to underage characters even as a joke I’m begging you

[animefacialrecognitionsoftware01]

JGHHGGFJGHGHJHAHAHAHAHAHA

[fuckyeahasexual]

[wodneswynn-deactivated-deactiva]

It's funny how exclusionist Tumblr defaults to "virgin" as an insult while being belligerently sex-negative themselves

[wodneswynn-deactivated-deactiva]

Y'all all sound like "OP is cancelled and problematique b/c they get off to anything other than a quick fuck in the missionary position between two married partners for the purpose of conceiving a child"

[toothyblowjob]

exclusionist tumblr: i hate asexuals bc they all treat sex like it's something dirty

also exclusionist tumblr: if you have any kinks you're a terrible person

[wodneswynn-deactivated-deactiva]

Eeeyup

[themintycupcake]

Also "I'm allowed to call you gross, mocking names like 'turbovirgin' because it isn't a slur and you're a cringe snowflake if you get upset."

[nyxtic]

i love how like. he him lesbians never fucking asked yalls opinions of them and yet EVERYONE suddenly wants to give their two cents

[nyxtic]

weve been existing since the fucking sixties but now that its suddenly cool to be a class traitor (i.e. transmed/truscum) its SO easy to throw us under the bus and act like we're the ones who opress trans people

[capcourse]

especially the ones that say he/him lesbians trigger their dysphoria. like im really sorry youre going through that but you need healthier coping mechanisms to deal with that rather than hating a group of people you choose to not understand 

[2sweet4]

i just dont get it?? doesnt the he/him pronouns contradict the lesbian label like?

because lesbian is wlw but if you're using he/him then? ur a man not a woman?

not looking to start arguments or whatever im genuinely just confused cuz ive been seeing this for a while and just do not get it

[nyxtic]

the first thing about he him lesbians you gotta understand is that pronouns =/= gender

one good analogy is clothing. wearing masculine clothing (i.e. masculine pronouns) does not mean im a man. im a women who wears masculine clothing

its all about presentation and the rejection of femmininity

we are NOT men, because men cannot be lesbians. we are women and/or nonbinary people who use he him pronouns to present ourselves

[fucklikeapoet]

i have nothing against anyone but that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard in my life. “we are not men, because men cannot be lesbians. We are WOMEN and or NON-BINARY people who use HE/HIM pronouns to present ourselves.” there’s a difference between lesbians who present masculine and those using he/him pronouns. Most Trans folks aren’t upset with y’all we’re upset at the stupidity of literally that sentence right there. I get it you know present how you want, but don’t get upset when people are gonna contradict that because you’re contradicting yourself. “Oh I’m not a guy but ima use he/him pronouns.” there’s nothing wrong with being non-binary and idk why you even put that on there because most of the non binary folks I know uses they/them pronouns. And even if they presented either as more masculine and or feminine, we don’t get upset about their usage of pronouns if they did go by he or she. But please, reread what you put out in the internet because its hella disrespectful to trans folks and our struggles because we actually experience that struggle of fighting for our rights and gender to be perceive by others as how we present it.

[eroticcannibal]

Yeah sorry it's not disrespectful to us at all for people to use whatever pronouns they are most comfortable using, regardless of their gender. Stop trying to act like shitting on he/him lesbians is a trans thing. It's not. We're not with you on this.

[twink-privilege]

@fucklikeapoet another trans guy here to say that i am more comfortable (=completely) with any lesbian who uses he pronouns to signal his complicated lesbian identity and relationship with gender than i am with anyone, cis or trans, who chooses to attack them over something that in no way hurts us and that they have been doing for decades. there is no way for a lesbian to disrespect my gender simply by existing in his, her, or their (or any other pronouns they might use) gender and sexuality in a way that makes them comfortable. period.

so:

[kiyagan-deactivated20191129]

nonblacks need to stop attaching “non-” to everything like half of yall dont even know what the fuck youre saying and youre adding it to shit thats already got a word for it…give it a rest

[tptoh-moved]

sorry to add a comment but its not even english: its aave! people keep saying shit like “im sorry did BLACK PEOPLE invent the non prefix” like no we didn’t create the non prefix but “nonlesbian” “nonmlm” isn’t english lmfao. imagine sounding that stupid for the sake of being too lazy to use the right term

[twink-privilege]

? what’s the one word term for “not lesbian” or “not mlm”

[eroticcannibal]

I’m really not fond of the gaslighting narrative anti-kink people are starting to push

“Oh we’ve never had a problem with kinky people being there and wearing leather! It’s those people doing scenes-” BULL. FUCKING SHIT. I have been watching this discourse develop, you are FUCKING LYING. YOU HATE US BEING THERE, YOU HATE WHAT WE WEAR AND YOU FUCKING SAID SO YOURSELVES.

Don’t fall for it. They are trying to make kinky people look melodramatic and like we are siding with people non-consensually involving people in scenes. It is a lie. Do not fall for it. This is about us being allowed to be at pride. They want us gone. Don’t believe otherwise. 

[wetwareproblem]

Here’s the thing I’ve been puzzling about since this wave started: WHAT people doing scenes in the street?

Seriously, where the fuck is this a regular enough occurrence that we need to have Discourse about it?

It’s not happening. Y'all just think that someone wearing too much leather, or a collar, or some cuffs, is inherently sexual. And fuck you for that.

[weknowwearebeautifulanduglytoo]

But like if you’ve got a man he’s got a leash that has three other men dressed in leather dog masks and like strappy suits you’re trying to tell me that’s not about a kink?

Like if you wanna wear full leather I’m down for people wearing full leather. But leather dog masks and a pet kink is not what people are coming to pride for. So don’t bring it

[eroticcannibal]

First of all who said kink stuff isn’t kink stuff Second of all, if you aren’t ok with dog masks, don’t go to pride. Pups been there a long time, why should they leave? Just walk away. Avoid them. third of all, this is about people moving the goalposts to gaslight kinky people about what has been said. I’m talking about how this is the first step to excluding us completely.

[weknowwearebeautifulanduglytoo]

Dude pride isn’t about kinks though. It’s about LGBT+. If you wanna celebrate link have a day to celebrate kink.

While there’s crossover being LGBT+ isn’t inherently kinky. You aren’t going to pride to celebrate your kink of being degraded or of being treated like a dog. You’re supposed to be there to support LBGTQIA+ people.

And their families. And impressionable young queer people. And if you’ve got a ten year old trans kid at pride I guarantee their parents aren’t there to explain why that guy is pretending to be a dog. They’re there to celebrate their kid. Pride is supposed to be a safe space to do that

[twink-privilege]

bro they’re GAY (or bi or queer or trans, but kink floats are usually mainly compromised of mlm). they’re coming to pride TO BE GAY AND kinky!

and they marched in the same parade with PFLAG and vancouver school districts and political parties and walmart and all the banks without any kids keeling over dead from being exposed to gay men in their underwear! just like they didn’t from seeing this random leather dude who was marching on his own:

or this nightclub float:

or this swim club!

“mommy why is that guy wearing a dog mask” “i don’t know jessica maybe he really likes dogs!” “thats silly!” “haha yeah!” is a real conversation i’ve heard happen like kids don’t look at them and go “this is a sex thing” they go “that’s a guy dressed as a dog” and then they criticize their dog costume or get excited or think you can only wear one if it’s halloween etc etc

[twink-privilege]

i went to pride the other day and saltily took pics to share on tumblr and i’m debating posting them lmao

[twink-privilege]

here’s the puppy float/trailer

people dressed as or more revealingly:

swim club

drag artists

random guy w the green party

night club

[twink-privilege]

“in the real world the acronym is just lgbt!!!!!”

[twink-privilege]

i went to pride the other day and saltily took pics to share on tumblr and i’m debating posting them lmao

[twink-privilege]

here’s the puppy float/trailer

people dressed as or more revealingly:

swim club

drag artists

random guy w the green party

night club

[twink-privilege]

i went to pride the other day and saltily took pics to share on tumblr and i’m debating posting them lmao

[wetwareproblem]

I just saw a post about the Thomas Sanders debacle, which mentioned that one of the points in the smear campaign was "He acts like a kid but he's almost 30!"

And... That made me pause and notice something.

Look at the things the REGs love to mock about the "wrong sort" of queers, and you'll see it too: A lot of the reason they find things 'cringy' is because they seem juvenile. Being into childlike things is being cast as inherently suspicious - you have to be a Proper Serious Adult if you want to maintain your LGBT membership.

But here's the thing: Queer kids, especially trans kids, spend so much time questioning and masking and denying and hiding that we miss a lot of formative adolescent experiences and joys. So when we finally figure our shit out and are free to be ourselves, a lot of us indulge in adolescent stuff as part of our recovery.

(Also, I'd like to take a moment to point out that individual self-expression - looking the way you want, not the way people want you to look - is seen as one of those adolescent things you're supposed to grow out of and how fucked is that)

And that's okay. It's healthy. It's what recovery looks like for a lot of us. So seeing it recast as cringy or suspicious is... Disturbing.

Never trust anyone who says that healing and recovery are bad. Never trust anyone who would cut real people from recovery tools for the sake of abstract ideals.

[jabberwockypie]

I feel like this overlaps with the way that crowd keeps flinging around “freak” as an insult. They are so desperately clinging to and idolizing normalcy as the end-all, and it’s so stupid. Being “normal” is not important.

Queer people, child abuse survivors, (and there are quite a few of us who are both) - in recovery at a certain point it becomes really important to go through those developmental stages that you missed at the age you were Supposed To Be having them.  I’m in my 30s and I have stuffed animals on my bed and a doll collection. I like glitter. It’s not hurting anybody.

And honestly, just let people like what they like, period. One day you’ll be 30. Or 40. Or 50. And if you try to limit your life to . . . I don’t know, taxes? Beige? Golf? Whatever the fuck it is you consider Proper Adult Behavior? You’re going to be miserable. And you know what? You have the right to choose to be miserable, but stop imposing it on other people.

[octopuscato]

Without wanting to derail the original point, but this also goes for neurodivergence. A lot of autistic people are seen as ‘childish’ or ‘juvenile’ in their interests and expression. And as said above - that this is instantly seen as ‘suspicious’...no. That’s not a good thing, that is disturbing. All of these are valid reasons for why someone may not present like what you imagine some stereotypical version of ‘normal adult’ should be. Plus, even with none of them being the case, not being like what you imagine a ‘normal adult’ should be like is...also valid.

It really really irks me that we need a justification for every self-expression that’s even slightly deviating from these stupid parameters defined as ‘normal’.

[wetwareproblem]

I'll go a step further: "Normal" is one of the most powerful and insidious tools of social control, and it should be actively destroyed.

And no, this isn't derailing. My queer and neurodivergent experiences are near-parallel and intertwined.

[dollcourse]

thing about “ace pride” that makes me so mad is the fact that the lgbt community’s origins, whether you like it or not, are deeply rooted in sexual freedom and acceptance. Sorry u guys are so disturbed by how a lot of historical lgbt artists drew sex, penises, breasts, etc. Literally every other group hates us for it so if people within lgbt start complaining or erasing gay people for their sexuality, or trans people for showing confidnece in their bodies through sexuality, you’re literally doing the exact thing we’re trying to combat.

[bricksotherblog]

I’ve seen a lot of hilarious strawmen about asexuality in my time, but “aces want to ban all nudity” is certainly a new one on me

also

@animefacialrecognitionsoftware

[demiboy-mint-choco-deactivated2]

Exclusies just keep making shit up, huh?

@ungracefulace @nicetomeetyouimqueer check this buffonery out

[ungracefulace]

When you start something out with “the thing about ace pride that makes me so mad” you know you’re about to read some freezing take. This was no different

[twink-privilege]

op i hope you have never reblogged or agreed with those “kink at pride is bad and gay men being open about liking sex is the reason the straights hate us” posts that are incredibly popular among the Big Name Exlus rn because otherwise this post is going to kill me

[astridshibe]

tucute: i dont have dysphoria nor am i uncomfortable with my birth gender, but i wanna be a real trans boy uwu

tucute: *goes on testosterone and ends up experiencing reverse dysphoria*

tucute:

[a-cute-trans-man]

sure that happened. So real. So not made up.

[disks-and-horses]

it has, though. what do you think happens when you go on hormones without dysphoria?

dysphoria is when someone’s brain is disconnected from their body. the mind is on estrogen while the body is on testosterone or vice versa. when a trans person goes on hormones, the hormones going into your body will begin to match up with what your brain has.

if your hormones match up, estrogen and estrogen, your body will be on testosterone and your brain on estrogen. and boom, that’s dysphoria.

[a-cute-trans-man]

Please, show me any source that says people who transition without dysphoria are more likely to detransition than people who transition with dysphoria (or people who are misdiagnosed with dysphoria before they transition). Until you have sources, all you’re doing is guessing.

And by the way, the theory that trans people are exposed to different hormones in the womb, thus making the brain develop “female” while the body develops “male” or viceversa, is a medical theory. It might be what happens, but it can also be wrong, because it hasn’t been “proved”.

[disks-and-horses]

i’ll admit i do not have a source for detransition being more common in “nondysphorics”. however, i never stated it was. i said that it has happened before, and why it happens. and it has!

“Cass Bliss” is known as the period prince. they used to identify as a trans man, however i believe they are now non binary. they did not have dysphoria, as proven by their several posts of “free bleeding”, and decided to go on hormones.

bad idea. they stayed themself that they didn’t even recognize themself, and that they felt like a stranger in their own body. they didn’t recognize their voice. that’s what dysphoria is, and that’s what people with dysphoria have to deal with daily.

their instagram has since gone private.

[a-cute-trans-man]

The “period prince” said they had dysphoria, (also you can’t diagnose someone with dysphoria or lackthereof based on the photos they post on social media????) went on hormones, said they don’t regret what T did to them, and only got off hormones because of insurance problems. Quote from this article: “ Had I continued my weekly shots, which I stopped because of issues with my health insurance, my periods may have eventually ceased.” They said the way their body is going back to a more feminine figure is making them dysphoric and they want to go on T again whenever their insurance problems are solved (that’s the last I heard from them, I don’t know if since then they’re back on T. Also the posts in which they said they had dysphoria and didn’t regret T are on their instagram so I could link them to you but you wouldn’t be able to see them i guess).

Feel free to send me if you find of any person who said they were non dysphoric, went on T, and regretted it.

[phobicat-blog]

haha but jsyk shitheads this is so easy your sexual orientation is based on SEX not on GENDER if you’re a gay ftm then you like other ftm’s and cis women! if you’re straight ftm then you like mtf’s and cis men!  everyone has biological sex 

[twink-privilege]

if you like cis women and trans men you’re a bisexual you weirdo

[phobicat-blog]

if you force a gay woman into having sex with a transwoman then you’re homophobic!! if you force a gay man into having sex with a transman then you’re homophobic!! Homosexual individuals are only attracted to people who share the same sex organs as they do! HENCE being HOMOsexuals. It’s not “transphobia” some people just have preferences. 

[twink-privilege]

adjangjanfjsjjfksnfjsjf WHAT

[eroticcannibal]

Humans-off is litterally threatening violence over Deku apologizing Holy shit

[archivedtdp-deactivated20240111]

You love to lie about people, don’t you? No, I wasn’t threatening Deku or anyone considering that situation is literally impossible. All I was doing was expressing my protectiveness over a friend getting unfairly attacked, you utter piece of shit.

Oh look, this idiot still can’t read. It wasn’t directed at Deku for fuck’s sake - it was directed at pieces of shit like you who lie about a genuinely sweet person and start bullshit drama. Plus, it wasn’t even a real threat anyway.

And you, you’re literally over 30 years old so grow the fuck up already. Also, I’m not truscum or transmed at all but nice try, you fucking loser. Nice to see how quick you are to turn hypocrite after YOU followed someone and decided to be a dickbag about the fact that they disagree with you. You’re nothing but a double hypocrite which is even worse considering how old you are lmao.

[archivedtdp-deactivated20240111]

Since these people are cowards who block people before spreading lies about them here I am having to do it this way again. Fucking pathetic.

@androgynousblackbox, kindly go fuck yourself. Honestly, you’re so full of shit.

> Yo, to people claiming that person didn’t explicitely said “Me, human-off, would beat the shit out of Deku the nerd if I had them in front of me” and so we are spreading nothing but lies…

I didn’t say I’d beat the shit out of anyone since it was a hypothetical to begin with, but no, it had nothing to do with Deku.

> When done with that, don’t even attempt to tell me those are completely separate instances with no relation to each other because that chicken is not going to fly.

Your links don’t mean anything. They’re just you going off and you’re clearly a full-on liar who pulls stuff out of their ass. They don’t prove anything. In which, I replied to the short one already and I’ll be addressing your long ass rant once I’m done with this bullshit.

> Finally, just in case wasn’t clear: I encourage blocking, not harassment. Don’t go after them to try to initiate shit because that is not how we play here. Harassment is still bad even if the target are highly questionable people. Just block them out, deplatform them.

That’s not how you play at all - you block people and then you lie and you slander, so don’t even try to make yourself seem like a moral person here because you’re very much not.

Also, you’re not gonna deplatform me, dude. Not to flex or sound full of myself or anything, but I have a shit ton of followers and a lot of the notes from the shit I reblog about this drama have been in support of me so yeah sorry not sorry but you’re not gonna drown me out any time soon. You’re just anti-free speech, hypocritical, pro-censorship losers and that’s all you’ll ever be.

[twink-privilege]

[eroticcannibal]

Im going through the piv critical tag for shits and giggles and I found the FUNNIEST thing

[eroticcannibal]

I can’t get over this. This is the best post ive ever seen. “Women”/those with vaginas are pure little angels who would only ever masturbate with their hands uwu

[eroticcannibal]

There’s just so many things wrong with this

People with vaginas can only orgasm through clitoral stimulation? Gspot who? I know people who can orgasm from just nipple play, or tickling, or having their feet licked, or dirty talk, or just straight up thinking themselves into orgasm. Bodies are weird!

Why would you think people shouldn’t be doing fun things just cus it won’t get them off? HAVE YOU HEARD OF FOREPLAY?

this person clearly either doesn’t know many women or people with vaginas, or they aren’t open with this person cus…. we horny, ok? Almost everyone I know with a vagina owns a dildo. Even the ones who wouldn’t go near a dick. Most of us own several. And WE USE THEM. A LOT. CUS ITS FUN. Like if you aren’t a fan of sex toys.. fine? But like…. they are designed to be fun.

“Getting off with dildoes is an idea propagated so that-” nah. Just go ask any cis man how he’d feel if his girlfriend was using one. Most of them are actually really against sex toys in general cus its a threat to their masculinity. Again, we use them because they are fun!

“I don’t know any women who own sex toys cus we can get ourselves off” ok first of all no not everyone can do that, second of all, so? You could also survive off mashed potatoes and butter, doesn’t mean you should. Sex toys make getting off quicker/easier/more fun/introduce sensations you wouldn’t otherwise experience/etc. I mean, folks with dicks don’t exactly have a hard time getting off, and you’ve seen the popularity of sex toys aimed at them, right?

Women are pressured into buying sex toys to practice getting off to PIV? Shdjjdjdjdje go ask anyone with a gspot wand if that actually makes a difference in piv sex. The only person who’s practicing makes a difference there is the one with the dick.

“Vibrations make the act more tolerable” WHAT DO YOU HAVE AGAINST ORGASMS.

[twink-privilege]

every time i see a radfem say that penetration is painful or unpleasant im like you just don’t like penetration your body just doesn’t like it it’s not some universal experience like some people just find it unpleasant it happens but it’s not the norm alternatively ur using too big dildos or going too fast or ur not producing enough lubricant like it’s FINE but to claim that ppl w vaginas are just Conditioned into it by the Patriarchy bc u don’t like them is hilarious and peak radfem thought process

like getting off definitely feels better if u have something in for a lot of ppl hnfndndjssh