✨Twinks✨

He/Him/They/Whatever

[shittysawtraps]

jigsaw reportedly in the process of developing the “saw treat,” which is like a saw trap but good

[lesvegas]

you can only reblog this if you're not racist

[dorkhellbside]

cats love sleeping on or next to you and slowly bake you like an oven roast chicken

[lemonsweet]

The other day my nephew described something as being "like if Slenderman was stuck in a little car" and I yelled YES!!!! bc I thought he was referencing this image I like but then I showed the picture and he was like how do you have an image for that where did you get that

[my-flying-sister]

I love rebloging. It’s the adult equivalent of showing everyone the cool rock I just found.

[the-dandy-liar]

[thememedaddy]

[pukicho]

Am I your special little boy

Not particularly

[vaporsnake]

they should rewrite the bible so that jesus would be a hot 5'2 girl with a creampie fetish from missouri

[vaporsnake]

would you prefer if she had a different fetish tumblr user nutsacktorturer

[thememedaddy]

[thememedaddy]

[cottoncandylesbo]

guy named all trades: 🤤

guy named dead horse: OW OW OW OW OW

[therisingking]

Girl when I tell you my life flashed before my eyes

[saturniandragon]

[lingonberry24]

[foolishmortal]

what if you told someone you liked their shoelaces while you were on your knees blowing them in a bathroom stall and they told you that they stole them from the president

[therisingking]

You bitches really won’t let me catch a fucking break huh

[rabbits-of-negative-euphoria]

if they're gonna remake The Princess Bride, it should open with a kid sick in bed scrolling on his phone. his grandpa arrives with a gift--it's a DVD player with a disc already inside. grandpa hooks it up to the TV and presses play. and we all just watch the original 1987 film again.

[wyrmicelli]

me tongue-deep in a sandalwood candle: 🤤

the tjmaxx employee loading a fourth tranquilizer dart into their blowgun: i need backup

[snowown]

[sp1c3-r4ck-synd1c4t3]

Horny people legally cannot consent. Horniness is a clouded state like inebriation. If you are partway through sex and you realize you might've become horny, it is illegal to continue. If you have ever made someone horny, you are a bad person.

[villainessbian]

Trans positive 1940s mafia goon: of course ya have "broad shoulders" sugar, you ARE a broad.

[bipirate]

*slaps roof of zosan* you can fit so much sexual tension in this bad boy