phil lester you're a genius

Sarah, 30ish, NY. Introvert who's still discovering herself. Formerly melapplesphan. (icon by twilightciel)

[perrfectly]

“I wonder how biology can explain the physical pain you feel in your chest when all you want to do is be with someone.”

— Dan Howell (via perrfectly)

[madgf-deactivated20171109]

and that’s why friends should sleep in other beds, and friends shouldn’t kiss me like you do

commission for @hazyphil - thank you so much for the lovely idea :((

reblog, don’t repost!!

[miiriya]

you ain’t grading a college paper

[vanlifunhouse-deactivated202101]

Do this for any company that asks you to review their employees always.

[an0nymz]

You wouldn’t believe the number of times I swear I get 4/5 star ratings at my job just because the way people think is “well 5/5 means perfect and nobody’s perfect, 4/5 is good!” The company I work for doesn’t understand this common mentality at all, and will let people go over not having consistent enough 5/5 ratings. Obviously they don’t inform the customers of that.

[fwizard]

this also applies to your restaurant servers!!

[misha-mishaila]

Drew a photo realistic drawing of @danielhowell haha. I love his loafyness.

[shroomfucker]

Ah, to be a sleepy prison guard on the way to a chair by the cell of an adventurer… Maybe I will wear my oversize ring of keys extra loose tonight.. who knows what could happen if I were to uh… doze off.. ;)

[insanitysilver]

tfw you read those first couple lines of a fic and your shoulders just relax because the writing is good and you know you can rest there for a while

[vestiges-of-light]

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[higglety]

good job everyone

[topshotpicks]

[theblogchoseme]

How deep was that? Her whole body disappeared.

[briges]

its the G A T E W A Y  T O  S A T A N S  L A I R

[impossible-soufflegirl-deactiva]

did i reblog this already? i don’t even know. fuck it, here you go.

[thatskristy-deactivated20131015]

dead. 

[kage-hide]

Where. Did. The. Body. GO?!

[bobbyflayvor-deactivated2018072]

OMG LMFAO I CAN’T, I’M CRYING, THIS IS SO FUNNY. LMAO I’M SUCH A BAD PERSON HELP

[pumpkinlore-blog]

Am I the only one that, seeing the “it’s the Gateway to Satan’s Lair” comment, images Satan just sitting on his throne of skulls chilling when suddenly this girl plops in from above and he goes “What the fuck?” while sipping his blood-of-the-innocents martini or…?

[hrmphfft]

[everydaylouie]

ghost choir 👻 🎵

[teacupfulofstarshine]

I DID NOT THINK ANYTHING COULD TOP GHOST DUET

I WAS WRONG

I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO HAPPY TO BE WRONG IN ALL MY LIFE

[danhowellgifs]

big same

[dudepositivity]

If you have depression and find yourself taking naps often due to chronic fatigue I just wanna remind you that you aren’t wasting time. You aren’t running out of time. You need rest, you need to catch up on the energy that you spend fighting your depression. It’s all gonna be okay. Life is long, you’re not wasting it by sleeping a little more often.

[japhannie]

if they reference the betta as "our son" you will find me crying in a corner

[two-fond-dorks]

"Phil's gone ahead and made a big life decision without consulting me" is one of the most married things I've ever heard please punch me in the face.

[a-boy-cutting]

Depression in summer is weird. It’s not dark and brooding, for me - it’s white and hazy and confusing. You feel very absent from everyone and everything and all the light seems a little too bright for your tired eyes.

[darkestelemental616]

#false nostalgia so intense it makes your skin itch

[reiding-and-writing]

Reblog if you're a fanfic writer and you wanna know what your followers' favorite story of yours is ❤

[kingwizardandthelizardgizza-blog]

Douglas Adams is the best when it comes to describe characters

[quasarkisses]

they need to teach classes on Douglas Adams analogies okay

“He leant tensely against the corridor wall and frowned like a man trying to unbend a corkscrew by telekinesis.”

“Stones, then rocks, then boulders which pranced past him like clumsy puppies, only much, much bigger, much, much harder and heavier, and almost infinitely more likely to kill you if they fell on you.”

“He gazed keenly into the distance and looked as if he would quite like the wind to blow his hair back dramatically at that point, but the wind was busy fooling around with some leaves a little way off.”

“It looked only partly like a spaceship with guidance fins, rocket engines and escape hatches and so on, and a great deal like a small upended Italian bistro.”

“If it was an emotion, it was a totally emotionless one. It was hatred, implacable hatred. It was cold, not like ice is cold, but like a wall is cold. It was impersonal, not as a randomly flung fist in a crowd is impersonal, but like a computer-issued parking summons is impersonal. And it was deadly - again, not like a bullet or a knife is deadly, but like a brick wall across a motorway is deadly.”

[nudityandnerdery]

And, of course: “The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.”

[assassinregrets]

the one that will always stay with me is “Arthur Dent was grappling with his consciousness the way one grapples with a lost bar of soap in the bath,” i feel like that was the first time i really understood what you could do with words.

[marsdaydream]

I will reblog this every time I see it because these are some of my favorite sentences in the English language.

[ochibana]

(・ω・)゛